Weakness Trap - Chapter 35

The moment Yu Qingluan saw Yan Lanshen, her blood ran cold from head to toe.

Wave after wave of chills washed over her, bringing tremors. Her scalp tingled, and the rest of her body was no exception.

It was as if she had been embraced by the General of Winter and met Medusa’s gaze all at once.

Yu Qingluan couldn’t even move her eyes. Staring blankly in Yan Lanshen’s direction, her mind went completely empty.

Yu Lingxue didn’t move.

She was still inside the room, unable to see Yan Lanshen and unwilling to lay eyes on her.

“Why are you here?” She knew perfectly well how to leave.

Yu Lingxue pressed her wrist against an acupoint to stave off the overwhelming dizziness. Seeing Yu Qingluan’s rigid posture, her heart skipped a beat.

“Can’t I come? I’m here to take my fiancée home. There’s nothing wrong with that, is there?”

“Or do you not want to acknowledge it?” Yan Lanshen had no interest in the person before her, in any sense.

But that didn’t stop her from resorting to this desperate measure to provoke her.

If she couldn’t sever Yu Lingxue’s hopes, she would sever Yu Qingluan’s instead.

For the next two years, Yu Lingxue would be following her. No one could stand in the way.

It was then that Yu Qingluan moved.

Step by step, each lift of her leg felt like being pricked by needles and slashed by knives, forcing her to control her movements, unable to take large strides.

Yet she still moved, inch by inch, toward Yu Lingxue, whom she had hidden away in the room.

Her gaze was so distant it seemed as though her soul had departed.

“Little Bird” Yu Lingxue pleaded, calling out to her, hoping it would make her ignore the person at the door.

“Let’s, let’s just ignore her, okay? I don’t like her, not one bit. It’s you I like.”

Yu Lingxue tugged at the hem of Yu Qingluan’s clothes, pulling gently.

The fabric brushed against her skin, sending a shiver through Yu Qingluan, and a flicker of light returned to her eyes.

She grabbed Yu Lingxue by the collar and pulled her up.

“Little Bird, Qingluan, please, don’t send me away.” Yu Lingxue clung to her arm, still pleading desperately.

Yu Qingluan said nothing.

Apart from seizing Yu Lingxue and ejecting her from her room, from her territory, Yu Qingluan could do nothing else.

She was resolute and decisive, without a trace of reluctance, as she pushed Yu Lingxue out.

Yu Lingxue stumbled backward, colliding with Yan Lanshen, who caught her without a hint of emotion.

Yu Qingluan acted as if she hadn’t seen their interaction, her gaze as cold as frost.

“Don’t come back again.” She gave Yu Lingxue one final sentence before slamming the door shut with a bang.

Closing the door drained every last ounce of her strength.

Yu Qingluan leaned against the door and slid down to the floor. Tears began to fall uncontrollably. Her body continued to tingle and grow cold, and she lost control of her limbs. She couldn’t even wipe her own tears, only staring blankly ahead as her vision blurred.

Her crying had inherited a fraction of Yu Lingxue’s essence.

Only sobs, barely any sound, intermittent gasps for air like a ragdoll falling apart, her heart turned into a pitch black button, ready to be crushed at any moment.

She cried until the morning light seeped through the curtains, casting a pale golden glow.

Yu Qingluan slowly lifted her head and wiped her tears away with a single motion.

It was her fault.

She couldn’t blame anyone else.

She should never have had any further connection with Yu Lingxue, should never have accepted her gestures of goodwill.

It was her own greed, her pain driving her to seek solace, that made her reach for her poison once again.

It was because her heart was too soft. Seeing Yu Lingxue so pitiful, she couldn’t help but want to take care of her and be good to her.

Yan Lanshen had come to warn her.

Yu Qingluan covered her eyes and tilted her head back, tears streaming down through the gaps between her fingers.

She silently paid for her mistakes, feeling a sharper pain than ever before.

Yu Qingluan no longer allowed herself to sink into a daze amidst her tears as she had in the past.

She remained clear headed, soberly accepting the punishment she deserved.

The pain persisted until her phone’s alarm rang.

Yu Qingluan grabbed her phone, opened the messaging app, blocked Yu Lingxue’s account entirely, and then deleted the app.

She also deleted everything on her phone related to Yu Lingxue things she had once been reluctant to part with.

Photos, memos, phone numbers, playlists, even search history on forums and purchase records of gifts she had bought for Yu Lingxue in shopping apps.

The more she deleted, the more her heart ached, and the fewer tears she shed.

After finishing all this, she weakly dropped her hand and leaned against the door, breathing heavily.

Yu Lingxue and she were no longer connected.

Whether it was love or hatred.

They were now strangers. Love and hatred could only belong to the past.

From now on, she must not think of Yu Lingxue again.

She must not repeat the same mistakes.

She could do it she had to do it.

It was just pain. Endure it, and it would pass.

This time, Yu Qingluan would accomplish what she had failed to do two years ago.

Completely expel Yu Lingxue from her world.

“Let me out!” Yu Lingxue struggled to escape after Yan Lanshen dragged her into the car.

“Yu Lingxue, you have a fiancée,” Yan Lanshen said, gripping her chin and staring directly into her tear filled eyes.

“That’s your ex girlfriend. She doesn’t want you anymore; she pushed you away.”

“If you hadn’t come, would she have abandoned me?” Yu Lingxue raised her hand and slapped Yan Lanshen.

The slap drained all her strength, and she could only scoot backward, trying to put distance between them before reaching for the car door handle.

They had finally reunited, and Yu Qingluan had just accepted her again, even if it was out of hatred, even if the process was painful.

As long as she could stay by Yu Qingluan’s side, what more could she ask for?

Yu Lingxue frantically tried to open the car door, her hair disheveled and covering her face.

Tears clung to her strands, making her look truly like a madwoman.

But the car door was locked, and they were already on their way. No matter how hard she tried, Yu Lingxue couldn’t open it.

She could only curl up in the corner of the car, trying to make herself as small as possible, just so she could still catch the faint scent of oranges lingering on her clothes.

She blinked, tears falling one by one. She truly didn’t know what to do. Some things could only be done once; a second attempt would be futile.

Like pretending to be sick or weak, using her appearance to win Yu Qingluan’s sympathy.

She had had time to change her clothes before leaving.

After all, she was going to see someone she loved. She should have dressed elegantly, or at least neatly.

But she had chosen to remain as she was, even leaving the IV catheter in place not just because she was in a hurry.

If there were a next time, would Yu Qingluan even pay her any attention?

Yu Qingluan had never treated her so harshly before. Except in recent days.

When Yu Qingluan had grabbed her arm earlier, Yu Lingxue had genuinely felt fear.

An overwhelming fear, as if something had been irrevocably lost, impossible to piece back together.

Yu Lingxue couldn’t figure it out, and tears continued to fall uncontrollably.

Yan Lanshen, whose earring had been knocked off, slowly bent down and picked up the earring that had fallen onto the car floor.

She looked at Yu Lingxue, her gaze icy cold.

Yu Lingxue was provoked and lifted her head to look at her.

“Yan Lanshen, I’ve told you I don’t like you. I didn’t like you before, and I never will in the future. Your actions, your very existence, make me sick to my stomach.”

Yu Lingxue bit out each word, her voice low but forceful.

Yan Lanshen simply removed the other earring.

“No matter how many times you hit me, the one who marries you will only be me.” She didn’t need to say “unless.”

She just needed to turn her head and stop looking at Yu Lingxue.

Yu Lingxue truly felt a wave of nausea in her stomach and wanted to slap Yan Lanshen again.

Was there any power… that could keep her away from this person?

Hide away, escape for a year or two?

Once Yu Qingyuan fell, and she had control of the Yu family, no matter how capable Yan Lanshen was, she wouldn’t dare to confront her directly.

A year Yu Lingxue coughed violently.

Without Yu Qingluan, how could she endure this year?

Yu Lingxue stared at the crimson stain in her palm, remained silent for a few seconds, and then actually laughed.

If she couldn’t have freedom or love,

Then it seemed there was no need to endure this pain any longer.

After returning to Chucheng, Yu Qingluan maintained a routine of attending school, preparing materials, learning new skills and English, and occasionally doing embroidery, slowly passing the time.

No one knew she and Yu Lingxue had a story in M country.

Even she herself was unwilling to admit it, as if it had all happened in a dream a delusion born from missing Yu Lingxue too much, and now it was time to extinguish that delusion.

One day, seven days.

The first month was truly agonizing.

She would instinctively think of that person, of their final moments of tenderness, of all their shared experiences.

She had to exert effort to prevent her thoughts from slipping into the abyss of decadent pleasure, while also focusing on her own endeavors.

She had only six months at most to prepare for her studies abroad.

Her English was still very poor; the last time she took the IELTS, she barely scored a 5 in speaking, which was her weakest area. She needed at least a 6 in each section and an overall score of 6.5 or higher to be admitted.

Taking the IELTS was expensive, and for her family, it was a significant burden.

She wanted to enroll, and she was determined to make it happen.

She set a goal for herself: she had only one more chance to take the IELTS.

So, during that first month, Yu Qingluan placed a sponge on her desk with embroidery needles stuck in it.

Every time she thought of Yu Lingxue, she would prick herself.

She pricked her fingers and wrists. Later, when Yu Shuhua saw it, she had to switch to pricking her arms and shoulders.

It was a way to quickly snap back to reality, using pain to forget Yu Lingxue’s existence.

At first, she would prick herself dozens of times a day, her left hand covered in bruises, so sore she couldn’t do anything. Gradually, it reduced to just a few times a day.

In just a month, she found she no longer needed the needles to avoid drowning in thoughts of Yu Lingxue.

Yu Qingluan put away that sponge, waiting for the wounds on her arms to slowly heal and the bruises to fade.

By then, she would be able to formally bid farewell to that chapter of her life.

“Qingluan, about the trip to Hong Kong next week that I mentioned earlier, are you ready?” Zeng Lan was also preparing for their company.

There was something they needed to finalize together in Hong Kong. Zeng Lan had done extensive research and found that the location couldn’t be changed, so she informed Yu Qingluan.

By then, almost two months had passed since winter break.

Upon hearing this, Yu Qingluan instinctively glanced at her hand.

The last bruise was almost completely healed.

“No problem. And while you’re at it, get another box of hand cream for my mom.” Yu Qingluan felt relieved.

See? It wasn’t that hard after all.

Now, when she thought of Yu Lingxue, the pain wasn’t so unbearable anymore.

Yu Qingluan figured Yu Lingxue must have given up on her too.

Otherwise, why hadn’t she come to Chu City to find her even once in the past two months? Why hadn’t she tried contacting her with another phone?

They had simply let each other go, tucked away those memories, and treated them as part of the past. That was enough.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Zeng Lan asked, still a bit worried on the plane.

“Lan Jie, we’re already on the plane. It’s a bit late to ask now. Even if I’m not okay, I’ll just have to pretend I am.” Yu Qingluan chuckled.

“It is late, but I can still keep a close eye on you,” Zeng Lan said, patting Yu Qingluan’s shoulder. “Not bad, little one. You’re recovering from heartbreak pretty quickly.”

Yu Qingluan wanted to give her a smile.

But as she tried to lift the corners of her mouth, she realized she still couldn’t bring herself to smile.

…Someday, she would completely let go of all her feelings for Yu Lingxue. When she talked about her, she’d be able to smile.

Only then would she truly have moved on.

“I have no choice but to move on. There’s too much going on. As soon as I get back, I have to take my final IELTS exam. I’ve been memorizing those speaking topics until my head is spinning. I don’t even have the energy to think about that person.” Yu Qingluan forced a faint smile.

“True,” Zeng Lan didn’t press further.

They started discussing the first series Yu Qingluan had painted during winter break. Zeng Lan had taken Yu Qingluan’s designs and planned to create some small, culturally-inspired creative products.

Not many businesses were doing this kind of thing yet, but both Zeng Lan and Yu Shuhua were optimistic about the theme.

When they got off the plane and Yu Qingluan saw the sky over Hong Kong again, her heart clenched sharply.

The last time she was here was during the New Year.

She had followed Yu Lingxue here, only to be harshly confronted by reality.

This time, it was spring, and Hong Kong didn’t feel as gloomy. She was no longer entangled with Yu Lingxue either.

That was good.

Yu Qingluan found the architecture of Hong Kong a bit more pleasing to the eye and got an idea for a new painting to work on when she got back.

After unpacking on the first day, Yu Qingluan sketched out a draft of her new design and decided to go out for a walk.

Zeng Lan was busy with meetings, so she didn’t accompany her.

Yu Qingluan headed to the mall to buy the hand cream she had used last time the one that worked really well.

Halfway there, she suddenly noticed someone standing by the roadside, swaying unsteadily, about to collapse onto the street.

The traffic was heavy, and the light had already turned green. Yu Qingluan could see cars speeding toward them.

Without a second thought, she grabbed hold of the person.

The person seemed to have no strength, their bones soft, their body burning hot.

They leaned into Yu Qingluan’s embrace and looked up at her.

Yu Qingluan almost let go on the spot.

But at that moment, Yu Lingxue tightly wrapped her arms around Yu Qingluan’s neck.

“Little Bird, what are you doing here? I used the perfume you sent me a couple of days ago. It smells really nice I love it.”

She was talking about something that had happened two winters ago.

Yu Qingluan’s eyelids twitched. Had she lost her memory?