Transmigrated into the Zerg Race: Didn't We Agree to Call Off the Engagement? - Chapter 19

“It is all my fault.”

Zerg technology is just too advanced, and these insects certainly know how to play, Sirius thought.

“Mmh, yes! Just like that.” Elias arched his neck, draping his arms over Sirius’s shoulders while his fingers gently patted Sirius’s back. “Be good, Sirius. Do not be sad anymore. You must eat well and be a healthy, energetic male. It is all my fault. I did not protect Sirius well. I did not let Sirius be as happy as the other young males. It is all my fault. Sirius, do not be unhappy all by yourself. Blame it all on me, all right?”

If it had not been for him, Sirius’s abnormalities would not have been discovered. It was he who recorded Sirius’s story on the optical computer, which was eventually detected by the Main Brain. It was also him who, upon hearing other insects say Sirius’s body was too weak and his spiritual power would be low, timidly tested Sirius’s spiritual power ahead of schedule. Because he was a coward, he went everywhere asking about the state of Sirius’s spiritual power.

If it had not been for him, Sirius would not have been under surveillance. He would not have been lost in the universe, gone to that unknown planet, or ended up looking the way he did now. Fortunately, he did not deceive himself or the other insects into believing Sirius would be fine. Fortunately, he worried about Sirius and came to the Central Star; otherwise, would Sirius not have been left to grieve alone? Fortunately, he was not stupid to that extent. Fortunately, fortunately.

Elias kept saying things that Sirius did not understand. He did not know how Elias had wronged him or why he was using this method to compensate. He could not get a word in at all as Elias apologized incessantly. Sirius could only remain silent and do his best to cope.

He did not know where Elias found the medicine, but the supply could be described as steady. The sweet taste made it easy for Sirius to drink, especially after coming out of a chaotic banquet. He was indeed hungry.

“Wonderful, Sirius. You can eat so much now. You used to hate eating the most. No matter what I tried, you refused to eat even a little more. It worried me to death. Sirius was so good as a child. You did not cry or cause trouble, and you even comforted me when I was sad. But why did you hate eating? Was it because you did not like me? That makes sense. I was so bad to Sirius. I did not take good care of Sirius. How could Sirius possibly like me? You never proactively came to find me after reaching adulthood. You would not even acknowledge me unless I spoke to you first, and you never said I was yours again.”

Recalling this, Elias felt sentimental. Sirius kept his eyes tightly shut, not wanting to respond.

The newly arrived Sirius had been unwilling to drink milk, and he felt he could not be blamed for that. After all, he was not even willing to eat his eggshell, so how could he be willing to lie beside a human like creature to drink milk? Yes, this could not be blamed on Sirius. It was not that he was a picky eater; the blame lay with the Zerg system.

To provide a young male with the warmth of a home, Elias had personally fed Sirius after taking medication when Sirius was a child. Sirius, of course, was unwilling, so Elias had to put it into a container. Only then would Sirius manage a few sips. Consequently, his constitution was weak during his youth, and the medical insects diagnosed that he needed to keep drinking it until adulthood.

As for not seeing Elias, that was even easier to explain. Sirius was in a state of self rejection, so how could Elias be any different? But Sirius did not know what Elias was apologizing for. Was it for his weak constitution as a child? After reaching adulthood, Sirius had the highest spiritual power level among a group of males, so he clearly had not been affected. What was there to be sorry for?

Perhaps love is simply the constant feeling of owing someone? Or was it that, because of Sirius’s abnormality, Elias specifically thought of this way to coax him, trying to help him find the feelings of his childhood? That would be terrible; he did not want to keep causing trouble for other insects.

Sirius kept his head lowered, being continuously caressed by the female insect, his hair disheveled. The distance between the two insects closed, and the hand Sirius used for support felt a delicate texture. It was a thigh.

Sirius raised one hand, and the two insects naturally tumbled over. They lay side by side, facing each other. Elias’s hand was pinned under Sirius’s head, yet he continued to soothe Sirius, humming a song in fragments to coax him. His cheek pressed against the top of Sirius’s buried head.

“Sirius, you must not bite, all right? You cannot bite anyone. Quickly, let go.”

Elias still used the tone of someone coaxing a child. While being obedient, Sirius moved his head according to Elias’s wishes, feeling that Elias perhaps truly viewed him as a child.

However, they had no blood relation. Under the Zerg system, Elias was practically Sirius’s female insect unless Sirius explicitly stated he did not like him. Therefore, the deeper reason why Sirius had been unwilling to let Elias care for other males might have been that he did not want him to be this intimate with anyone else.

Sirius realized this in hindsight. No wonder he had been infatuated with Julian; perhaps it was because Julian and Elias were somewhat similar. At least when facing Sirius, Julian was just as gentle and intellectual as Elias. Though now, Julian had also become more vivid, possessing his own unique and cute traits. But it was undeniable that in the beginning, Sirius’s aesthetic preferences might have been influenced by Elias.

“Teacher,” Sirius chuckled. “Is it also because you took the medicine that it turned out like this?”

Sirius paused, bringing his hand before Elias’s eyes and waving his fingers.

Elias froze and instinctively moved back, pulling his leg away from Sirius. He tried to hide his state with an air of desperate concealment. He pulled a piece of gauze over to cover himself and turned his head away in shame, refusing to look at Sirius. It seemed as though as long as he did not look, nothing had happened and Sirius had seen nothing.

“Elias, what are you hiding for? Look for yourself and see if that is it.” Sirius was amused by him. He was very reluctant to admit that he seemed to have a rather wicked sense of humor.

“Sirius, do not be like this.” Elias seemed to wake from a certain state, no longer indulging in the imagination of old scenes. Or perhaps because his own reaction could not deceive another insect, he could not deceive himself either, and so he began to feel bashful. He tried to get up in shame, but Sirius stopped him. Sirius lowered his head and asked vaguely, “If I had been willing to let Elias personally feed me when I was a child, would Elias be like this now?”

As a child? Like what? What did he take himself for!

Elias was both ashamed and angry. He wanted to push Sirius away but truly could not bear to. Instead, he was met with the heartless Sirius returning a favor with a grudge.

“Hiss,” Elias winced in pain.

Speaking of which, Zerg blood is green, but they blush when they are shy. Only when they are truly injured and bleeding is it green. Perhaps the skin and the interior are not made of the same material? Sirius reached out, curiously touching the green on Elias’s chest, leaning in to sniff it.

Is it really an insect? It even has the scent of leaves. Speaking of which, the insects Sirius knows all prefer eating vegetables; only he insists on eating meat. The Zerg are quite miraculous.

Sirius’s thoughts wandered, drifting toward common insects. Common insects and the Zerg clearly share the same origin, yet the Zerg are always superior when facing them, as if they are exceptionally noble. They are clearly the same thing. He heard that there are even eccentric insects who eat common insects.

Looking at Sirius, Elias felt a bit angry. What a wicked male. Elias saw that he was in a bad mood and was kindly soothing him, even inviting him to eat and coaxing him the entire time, yet he returned kindness with a grudge. Not only that, he even started daydreaming on his own.

But Elias could not truly be angry with him because he always felt he owed Sirius. Whatever Sirius did to him was surely right. Thinking this way, the pain vanished, replaced by a sense of security. It was as if by being in pain, his guilt was lessened. But he knew that guilt would not be lessened just because he, the guilty insect, suffered.

The victim was right in front of him. He wanted to atone. He wanted to atone for his sins. The victim was so miserable, yet he was atoning just to make himself feel better. Could such intentional compensation truly be considered atonement? Was it not just for his own comfort? But if he did not atone, what else could he do?

Elias loosened his clenched fist and patted a familiar rhythm against Sirius’s waist.

Actually, when Sirius was small, Elias not only had to help him undress but was also responsible for dressing him. Sirius would feel embarrassed then, waving his hands to drive him away. When he could not drive him away, he would comfort himself that they were at least the same sex. He only later learned that the Zerg did not see things that way.

It truly is miraculous. Before this, Sirius never imagined such a scene. Perhaps because he saw the young male’s body, he had to take responsibility?

Thanks to Elias, who had been so considerate from childhood to adulthood, always doing so much for him. Speaking of which, Elias was still too much, even more so than Julian. Was it because the rainforest was truly good for raising insects, making the female insects fair, delicate, and exceptionally supple?

Elias’s voice was also very pleasant and melodious. Perhaps this was because he loved singing lullabies? Hearing his voice always made Sirius feel at ease.

Sirius continued to lean against Elias’s chest. After following Elias’s movements, he made a new request. “Teacher, why are you not singing to me anymore? When I slept in the past, Elias always sang to me. Now that I have grown up, will you no longer sing for me?”

Amidst the warm lullabies, Sirius wandered in a cozy and comfortable environment. His unused tail hook tapped out a comfortable beat. If it had not missed the mark, one might have thought it was a conductor’s baton in a commander’s hand.

That was not right either; Sirius had hit the mark. It was Elias who failed to keep the tune because Sirius was truly wicked and kept causing trouble.

On the other side, in the male apartments.

Because Sirius had proactively greeted him, the security robot did not drive Julian away, but it still stood firmly at the door. Julian was somewhat helpless. The male was not even home; he did not know what the robot was protecting. Was it afraid he would steal something?

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