Shadowed Love: A Lover Who Refuses to Let Go - Chapter 39.2

It was not regret over a broken home, but the realization after so many years that the happiness they pursued was just a mirage. The most impulsive and brave years had slipped through the cracks of time.

This only strengthened Yin Yunzhu’s resolve to stay single. She had originally held some hope for her relationship with Jiang Menghe, but now the warmth and ambiguity had faded, leaving only the cold, bare facts.

The gap between the two of them was like the difference between clouds and mud.

Shan Songyue let out a bitter laugh, as if she didn’t dare to look her daughter in the eye. “And you? Do you support the decision I made?”

“What are you saying?” Yin Yunzhu said helplessly. “We’ve lived together since I was a child. Of course I support you more than anyone. I’m just worried, how long do you plan to keep Xuan in the dark?”

“It’s not that she can’t handle it, it’s just that I’m afraid those mean kids in her class will gossip behind her back.” Madam Shan used a cloth to toss the discarded green onions and ginger into the trash, then stood up to tidy the pots and bowls.

“I’ll find a time to talk to her,” Yin Yunzhu offered a hand, walking into the kitchen and turning on the faucet.

The rapid stream of water looked white and frothy. She was distracted as she heard the woman behind her speak.

“Take your time when you talk to her.”

Many things usually start showing signs early on. When the two went to the Civil Affairs Bureau to handle the paperwork and were told about the one month divorce cooling-off period, they had been in frequent contact during that time. Yin Yunzhu could see it, and Yin Xuan was no fool either; she was simply anxious, keeping it bottled up in her heart, unwilling to say much.

The afternoon sun was intense. When Yin Xuan woke up, she rubbed her bleary, sleepy eyes, shivering and looking everywhere for a jacket.

Yin Yunzhu just assumed she hadn’t fully woken up yet, which was why she seemed so listless. She found the bright red jacket she had bought for her before the New Year from the walk-in closet and knelt down to slowly fasten the buttons for the little girl.

Yin Xuan had fair, delicate skin, and the vibrant color made her look exceptionally cute and lively. But she kept her head down, looking like a withered flower. Even after walking downstairs, the wind failed to wake her up.

“I told you to focus on eating. You didn’t get enough sleep, did you?” Yin Yunzhu joked as she fastened her sister’s seatbelt.

However, seeing that her complexion wasn’t as healthy as usual and fearing she had caught the recent flu, Yin Yunzhu reached out to feel her forehead.

“What’s wrong?” Yin Yunzhu brushed aside the bangs on her forehead.

Previously, Yin Xuan had been vain in class and followed the trend of growing out thick, straight bangs. Later, she found them bothersome and cut them off from the root. Now, they had grown into short, prickly stubble that looked like a fluffed-up cat’s tail from a distance.

Bai Jiali would never miss a chance to tease her about it, which had made Yin Xuan feel insecure and angry for a long time.

“Nothing,” Yin Xuan replied, clutching the seatbelt tightened across her chest, looking preoccupied.

“Really nothing?” Although Bai Jiali loved to play pranks, she truly adored her only precious little sister. “If someone is bullying you, tell me. I’ll help you get justice.”

“No need,” the child’s stiff attitude was like a cold piece of iron.

“Fine then,” Yin Yunzhu straightened up and started the car.

Sure enough, not long after leaving the Tiancheng Apartments, Yin Xuan couldn’t hold it in anymore. Her cheeks puffed out like a pufferfish. “Aren’t you even going to ask me why I’m angry?”

“I did ask, but you wouldn’t say,” Yin Yunzhu spoke the truth, taking a moment to glance at her.

“You just treat me like a child.”

“You are a child.”

“It’s not like you’re some mature adult either, okay?”

Since the argument was going nowhere, Yin Yunzhu stopped the car at an intersection. The area was filled with parents picking up and dropping off their children. Electric scooters were parked haphazardly, and occasionally, acquaintances would stop to chat.

“I’m not mature?” She frowned in confusion.

Normally, Yin Yunzhu would never take Yin Xuan’s words to heart. But after experiencing the scene of clinging to Jiang Menghe this morning, her thoughts were inadvertently swayed.

Jiang Menghe was not a promiscuous person; in some ways, she was more like a stubborn traditionalist who couldn’t accept new ideas. The small items she kept around her were always used until they were worn, let alone the people in her life.

Yin Yunzhu looked at her pinched ring finger again. After days of careful care, the terrifying purple bruising had faded. The nail was growing slowly, and it would likely take a while to fully recover.

The moment their compatibility had been acknowledged, the emptiness in her heart felt as if it had been filled with cotton, expanding until it was almost overflowing. If it wasn’t a conflict in the bedroom, was Jiang Menghe dissatisfied with the way she handled things?

Where exactly was she dissatisfied?

She was always like this, falling into deep internal friction, overthinking a casual remark for a long time, and being so humble in a relationship that she couldn’t even lift her head.

“When you broke up with your last girlfriend, you were secretly crying in the bathroom. I saw the whole thing,” Yin Xuan spoke up, pulling her out of her old memories.

Being called out by a child, Yin Yunzhu felt awkward, her cheeks flushing with a mix of embarrassment and anger. “That… that was different!”

“How was it different?” Yin Xuan asked back.

“Stop asking so many questions, kid.” Yin Yunzhu turned her sister’s restless head away.

The yellow light flashed, and the sound of honking flooded in with the traffic. Yin Yunzhu slowly pressed the accelerator, hearing Yin Xuan say dejectedly beside her, “You all treat me like a child, thinking I’m easy to fool.”

“What?” Yin Yunzhu didn’t hear her.

“I said, Mom is biased toward you with everything and doesn’t consult me,” Yin Xuan grumbled while picking at her nails. “I’ve clearly grown up.”

Yin Yunzhu was amused and annoyed by this. Leaving aside the lack of consultation, she had never heard of Shan Songyue being more biased toward her than Yin Xuan throughout their lives.

As the elder sister, she had to worry about everything for Yin Xuan. When they were little and Shan Songyue went to work, she was practically the one who played with her sister. If Yin Xuan tripped or bumped into something, Yin Yunzhu would be the one getting scolded at home.

She didn’t understand why, as daughters of the same mother, their treatment was worlds apart. Sometimes she even had selfish thoughts—if only she had been born later than Yin Xuan, then she would be the one receiving all the love and pampering now.

As she grew up and her thoughts evolved, she gradually changed those dark feelings. The bond of sisterhood was etched into her body. She viewed Yin Xuan as another version of herself and always felt she owed her something. She had watched Yin Xuan grow up with her own eyes. Although she was only eight, she was much more sensible than before. Compared to their mother, the little girl was closer to her.

This was the only thing that brought Yin Yunzhu comfort.

“As for who is favored, you should know in your heart.” Yin Yunzhu glanced at the rearview mirror, preparing to turn.

A left turn at the intersection ahead led to Yin Xuan’s primary school. Senior students were already passing by on bicycles, their fresh blue and white uniforms loosely unzipped, fluttering in the wind.

“But you all didn’t tell me…” Yin Xuan lowered her head, her voice laced with a strongly suppressed sob. “Mom and Dad are getting a divorce. You all knew. Even Sister Jiali knew. Only I…”

Her emotions finally reached a breaking point, and Yin Xuan couldn’t hold it back any longer. she lifted her head and began to wail. The voice of a child who hadn’t reached the voice-changing stage was loud and sharp, piercing through the narrow car cabin and echoing outside.

In an instant, parents and students lingering at the stalls by the gate all looked over.

Yin Yunzhu was both anxious and pained. She hurriedly pulled out a tissue to carefully wipe her sister’s face. Large teardrops slid down her cheeks, leaving two clear tracks. This reaction caught her completely off guard. She had just discussed with Shan Songyue after lunch about finding a suitable opportunity to explain things slowly. Now, the plan was ruined, and all the excuses she had prepared for stalling were stuck in her throat.

Yin Xuan hadn’t been in a hurry to go to bed after lunch. She had a delicate and sensitive mind and sensed that the two adults in the house were hiding something from her. In her stubbornness, she always wanted to prove it to them.

Who knew that while eavesdropping at the door, she would find out about the divorce? Most children haven’t experienced great storms. Forgetting to bring her homework was a massive deal in her eyes, let alone a change in the family. A happy reunion was like a shattered mirror, broken into pieces.

“Little Xuan, I’ll buy you snacks, okay? Don’t cry anymore…” Yin Yunzhu patted her back. Seeing that she didn’t get a definitive answer, she didn’t dare leave abruptly.

Yin Xuan wailed with her head back, her throat visible. Yin Yunzhu was at a loss. Seeing her sister cry so hard, she had to call the teacher and ask for a half-day leave for her.

She didn’t know how long Yin Xuan cried. By the time the school gate was closed, the pedestrians on both sides of the road had thinned, and the stalls were being packed up, Yin Xuan finally rubbed her eyes hard and stopped crying, her breathing ragged as if she had been drained of all her energy.

Her eyes were so swollen they were squeezed into slits. She leaned into Yin Yunzhu’s embrace, incoherently repeating a few sentences until she finally fell into a deep sleep.

Yin Yunzhu didn’t blame her. To be able to hold back the tears from the moment she found out until now made Yin Xuan the bravest little girl in her mind.

She held Yin Xuan in the same position until her arm was so numb she almost lost sensation. Even a slight movement felt like the itchy bite of a swarm of insects. Helplessly, she rested her chin on the girl’s head and cautiously scrolled through Weibo.

She rarely used social media, as fragmented information easily disrupted her inspiration. She would occasionally check it because of Jiang Menghe. No matter what the update was, Yin Yunzhu just wanted to know what the other woman did when they were apart.

She saw Jiang Menghe’s name in the search bar again. Unlike before, where it was tied to other stars, this time the tag was just her alone.

[Jiang Menghe Exposed to Have a Tragic Background]

It wasn’t a prominent tag, ranked near the bottom. If someone didn’t bother to scroll down, they wouldn’t notice such a clickbait title in the corners. However, the red arrow next to it indicated that the heat was steadily rising.

Yin Yunzhu had heard many rumors and had never believed baseless gossip. But when a matter was brought to light by so many people, it began to reek of a suspicious conspiracy.

Jiang Menghe was likely being targeted by a rival, with various fabricated images and groundless accusations presented to the public, making it seem like she wasn’t living a very good life.

Faced with the person who had once failed her, Yin Yunzhu should have felt a secret satisfaction, but a voice in her heart pulled at her reason.

It turns out I was also the one being deceived.

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