Self-Perception - Chapter 48

“Yibai is recovering well,” Wen Jinyan suddenly spoke up.

Hearing this, Ji Yibai stopped her chopsticks and looked up, curving her lips into a smile at her as a way of saying thanks.

Su Muqing burst into laughter. “Jinyan, I know you want to show her concern, but your tone is a bit too cold. No need to be so formal, how many years have we known each other now?”

Wen Jinyan sighed upon hearing this and continued eating.

Gu Wansheng placed a peeled lobster into Wen Jinyan’s bowl, took off her disposable gloves, pulled out a tissue, and said, “Her personality is actually quite good, steady, not flashy, gentle. She makes people feel very comfortable in how she handles things.”

Su Muqing and Ji Yibai exchanged a look; the only sound at the table was the bubbling of the hotpot.

Gu Wansheng tossed the tissue into the trash and looked up just in time to catch Su Muqing’s downward glance.

“Is there something you want to say to me?” Gu Wansheng asked.

Su Muqing cleared her throat. “No, no, I just noticed no one was grabbing this fatty beef. It’s actually quite good. Jinyan, you guys should try some.”

Wen Jinyan picked up a slice of beef with her chopsticks and swished it in the pot, the taste was indeed excellent. She immediately cooked a few more slices for Gu Wansheng.

“Ahem,” Su Muqing coughed lightly. Wen Jinyan instinctively looked up and saw Su Muqing signaling her with her eyes.

Her eyelids lifted slightly and then slowly lowered as Su Muqing tapped twice on the phone sitting on the table.

Wen Jinyan opened her phone, and sure enough, Su Muqing had sent her two messages.

[Su Muqing]: Did you see that? Teacher Gu is standing up for you!

[Wen Jinyan] (confused): Standing up for me about what?

[Su Muqing]: How is it that you’re only half-awake to this? I just said your way of caring for Yibai was a bit stiff, and Teacher Gu immediately stepped in to say good things for you. She is head over heels for you!!

Seeing those last words, the corners of Wen Jinyan’s mouth curled upward. She typed with one hand: Oh.

[Su Muqing]: I feel like you’re feeling pretty “good” right now.

[Wen Jinyan]: Drop the “pretty.”

Su Muqing didn’t message her again, and Wen Jinyan stared at the screen, letting out a soft laugh.

“What are you laughing at? Why so happy?” Gu Wansheng, being close by, heard her and looked over, catching the name “Su Muqing” on the screen.

Is chatting with Su Muqing really that fun?

Wen Jinyan slipped her phone into her pocket. “It’s nothing much.”

Gu Wansheng replied with a simple “Oh” and put her gloves back on to peel a lobster for her.

She was having such a great time chatting with her.

“Gu Wansheng.”

Wen Jinyan called her name.

Gu Wansheng replied lukewarmly, “Hmm?”

“Do you want me to help you peel the lobsters?”

The lobster was about to be torn to shreds by her.

Gu Wansheng looked at the mangled shrimp meat in her hand, her chest rising and falling slightly. “I’ll eat it myself.”

Wen Jinyan felt that something was off. When Gu Wansheng was peeling lobsters for her earlier, she was fine, even peaceful when leaning in to talk. It was only after Wen Jinyan laughed that Gu Wansheng became a bit… unusual.

Before she laughed, she was chatting with Su Muqing…

Wen Jinyan suddenly realized. Is she jealous?

“Teacher Gu, do you like eating lettuce?”

Following the voice, Gu Wansheng looked up. She was holding a piece of lettuce, which now wrapped the mangled shrimp meat from earlier.

Gu Wansheng replied without much emotion, “Yes. Body management.”

“Then Teacher Gu, let me move the lettuce closer so it’s easier for you to reach.” As Su Muqing spoke, she moved the plate of lettuce in front of Gu Wansheng.

A muffled sound came from Gu Wansheng’s throat. It was very quiet, but Wen Jinyan, being close, heard it clearly.

“Thanks, I can reach it.”

Wen Jinyan thought the jealous Gu Wansheng was quite cute, but she also felt that Gu Wansheng needed a firm, unwavering answer. She leaned in, resting her head on Gu Wansheng’s shoulder, and whispered, “Gu Wansheng.” After a heartbeat, she added, “I really like you.”

Gu Wansheng’s shoulder line visibly stiffened, then softened. A familiar scent lingered on her shoulder, a faint pine fragrance that wasn’t at all overwhelmed by the smell of the hotpot. The pine scent filled her nose, it was a scent that felt detached from the world, yet the person wearing it was full of life.

“I like you too.” Gu Wansheng turned her head and left a lingering kiss on her earlobe.

The moment Wen Jinyan spoke, Gu Wansheng no longer cared about what happened before. And when Wen Jinyan spoke with that soft, slightly spoiled tone saying she liked her, Gu Wansheng almost couldn’t resist the urge to kiss her.

Their strands of hair intertwined. From an outsider’s perspective, it just looked like two people whispering secrets.

“Want some beef balls? I’ll put some in for you,” Wen Jinyan stepped back, straightening her waist.

The beef balls were on Wen Jinyan’s side, hidden by a plate, so Gu Wansheng couldn’t see them.

“Okay.”

Watching the beef balls go into the pot, Gu Wansheng suddenly felt a bit regretful. Su Muqing and Jinyan were clearly very good friends, it was normal for friends to chat and laugh at funny things. She herself would laugh when watching funny videos with Bai Jin. To be jealous of even this, and to make Jinyan have to coax her and pay for her emotions… why? Jinyan hadn’t done anything wrong. She was truly being unreasonable.

Gu Wansheng pinched her own arm hard, leaving a red mark as a self-punishment.

Gu Wansheng finally ate the beef balls, and the four of them moved from their personal topics to their future plans.

After the meal, Su Muqing suggested a group photo. Aside from Ji Yibai, who was pleasantly surprised, everyone else expected it.

They stood together: Su Muqing on the far left, Wen Jinyan on the far right, with Ji Yibai and Gu Wansheng in the middle.

“Listen to me: three, two, one.” With a click, the moment was frozen. Gu Wansheng took a separate photo with Ji Yibai. Perhaps encouraged by her idol’s sudden friendliness, Ji Yibai hesitantly asked if she could get an autograph. Gu Wansheng readily agreed.

“Sure, where should I sign?” Gu Wansheng looked around, realizing Ji Yibai wasn’t carrying anything to write on.

She couldn’t exactly sign her clothes or her hand. Years ago at a fan meeting, she had met an enthusiastic fan who asked her to sign their hand and said they wouldn’t wash it for months. It had shocked her for a long time.

Ji Yibai realized this and said, “Teacher Gu, please wait a moment!” She rushed into a room and came back a few minutes later, holding a book. She flipped to the blank title page. “Teacher Gu, can you sign here?”

“Of course.” Gu Wansheng took the pen, signed it, and handed it back.

Ji Yibai was so excited she almost jumped, but she maintained her composure. “Thank you, Teacher Gu.”

“We look to be about the same age; Dr. Ji can just call me Wansheng.”

The four of them chatted until past 10:00 PM. Seeing it was late, Wen Jinyan suggested leaving. Su Muqing and Ji Yibai saw them downstairs.

“This is far enough,” Wen Jinyan told them to go back. It was cold and dark, and Su Muqing and the others were only wearing loungewear.

“Remember to message us when you get home,” Su Muqing instructed.

The car window wasn’t fully closed from the outside, only half of Wen Jinyan’s face was visible. “Okay.”

Gu Wansheng drove away. Light music played inside the car. As they crossed the Jiangcheng Bridge, Wen Jinyan suddenly called out her name.

“What is it?” Gu Wansheng asked.

“Jiangcheng… it’s snowing.” Wen Jinyan stared out the window. Since the window wasn’t fully closed, snowflakes drifted in through the gap. She reached out to catch them, but they melted in mid-air before even landing on her hand.

“The snow seems a bit early this year.” Flakes drifted sporadically ahead, and the faint cries of surprise from people nearby could be heard. Gu Wansheng pulled the car into a nearby parking spot.

Seeing her put on a mask, Wen Jinyan asked, “Do you need to buy something?”

“Don’t you want to look at the snow?” Gu Wansheng’s eyes were sparkling as she handed a scarf to Wen Jinyan.

When will it snow in Jiangcheng this year?

She actually remembered.

Wen Jinyan understood her meaning, but considering her status, she said, “It’s the same if we watch it back home.”

They were currently near a shopping mall with heavy foot traffic, and because of the first snow, even more people were lingering around.

Gu Wansheng suddenly understood her concern. She wrapped the scarf around Wen Jinyan’s neck properly, then drove them home.

The snow grew heavier. When the two walked out from the underground garage, they happened to see some children gathered by the greenery. As they got closer, they could hear the children talking.

“I’m going to build a giant snowman!” “Then I’m going to build one even bigger than yours!”

The two looked at each other and smiled.

“What were you like when you were a child?”

Wen Jinyan reached out to touch the falling snow; it melted on contact, she couldn’t even feel its temperature.

“My childhood was very boring. I basically had no friends.” She spoke in a flat tone, but as she finished, she gripped the melted snow water in her hand, she still couldn’t feel the warmth.

“My childhood was also very boring, and I didn’t have many friends either.” Wen Jinyan stared at her, doubting the truth of her words.

“I was too beautiful. The other kids weren’t as pretty as me, so I didn’t want to play with them.”

Wen Jinyan was amused by her. Seeing her laugh, Gu Wansheng laughed too. As they reached the door, Gu Wansheng suddenly grabbed her hand. Wen Jinyan looked at her, confused.

Snowflakes fluttered down, enveloped by the bright glow of the streetlights. The voices of the elderly and children could be heard nearby.

A snowflake landed on Wen Jinyan’s hair again.

Gu Wansheng said, “If we keep walking like this, will we walk together until our hair turns white?”

In the night, under the lights, Gu Wansheng’s eyes were exceptionally bright, bright like tonight’s moon, making it impossible not to look at her. Her eyes could speak, and when she spoke to her, they were always filled with tenderness.

“We will.”

In this night, a promise, both direct and subtle was made.

As for Wen Jinyan, in her twenty-odd years, she had never thought about falling in love. Because of her original family, she held no expectations for the intangible reality of love. Falling for Gu Wansheng was outside her plan, but also within expectation. After all, how could anyone not like someone as good as her?

She never expected she would give such a certain answer for the future.

“Gu Wansheng, I want to build a snowman.”

By the time Gu Wansheng hurriedly came down with a knit hat and gloves, Wen Jinyan had already shaped the body of a small snowman.

“It looks great!” She didn’t scold her for not waiting to put on gloves first, she simply put on her own gloves and joined her. She could see that Wen Jinyan was in very high spirits right now.

As long as she was happy, it was enough.