After My Death, I Became a Heartless Madman - Chapter 58.1

The lights in the hospital room flickered dimly, casting a hazy glow. When the overhead fluorescent lamp was switched on, the world seemed to brighten abruptly, almost glaringly.

After the shallow mark removal procedure, Bai Ruowei had fallen into an exhausted slumber. Miss Bai, unconscious, was wheeled into a general ward, yet her hand remained tightly clasped around Shizhou’s, refusing to let go for the longest time.

The medical staff helped Bai Ruowei onto the bed, and Song Shizhou sat beside it, quietly watching her sleeping face.

The woman looked utterly docile in her peaceful sleep, her delicate features even carrying a hint of restraint nothing like the frenzied, obsessive demeanor from earlier.

Song Shizhou sat by the bedside, shrouded in the heavy darkness of the night.

Recalling what had just transpired, a bitter smile escaped her lips.

Perhaps she had been entangled with Bai Ruowei for too long, to the point where her actions had begun to resemble Miss Bai’s. Maybe, deep down, she too was a composed yet maddening soul, which was why she and Bai Ruowei had been drawn to each other, entwined until now.

Miss Bai’s words echoed relentlessly in her mind:

“Shizhou, we are the right people who met at the wrong time. In this lifetime, we won’t repeat the same mistakes.”

“Song Shizhou, can you give us a chance to rewrite the past?”

Leaning against the wall, Song Shizhou felt a dull throbbing in her head. It was two in the morning, and though exhaustion tugged at her, the chaos in her thoughts refused to grant her rest. So she remained there, absorbing the rare chill of the spring night, hoping it might clear her mind enough to think rationally.

Her feelings for Bai Ruowei were, in truth, complicated.

At the very beginning, she hadn’t even considered reconciling with Bai Ruowei.

She was a contradictory person sometimes yearning for love, other times steeped in pessimism, believing that what was lost should stay lost. Why cling to a past that couldn’t be mended?

Yet Bai Ruowei stubbornly refused to release her.

She wouldn’t let go, wouldn’t allow her to leave first not even in death. Even with the boundary between life and death separating them, she had obstinately waited by the Naihe Bridge, watching for Song Shizhou’s shadow.

Perhaps it was because of their two unhappy upbringings that she held no hope for repairing a shattered relationship. She didn’t know whether to give Bai Ruowei another chance now, whether to forgive Miss Bai, or what their life together would look like if they reunited.

[But this was Bai Ruowei, the one who understood her heart. So despite all her reservations, she couldn’t help wondering: Should she give their love one more chance?]

But what if, this time, they truly could have a happy ending?

A knock sounded at the door, a nurse making rounds. Having spoken too much today, Song Shizhou’s voice came out hoarse as she stepped out to assist with the medical records. For a moment, she felt oddly flustered.

The spring night in the Inner City carried a lingering warmth. The corridor window was left open, and the chirping of nameless insects filled the air, painting a scene brimming with vitality.

Footsteps approached. Before she knew it, Madam Chen had appeared at the end of the hallway, walking steadily toward her.

Chen Ting had originally been in a meeting in the Third District. Upon hearing about Song Lanyi’s incident, she hadn’t initially planned to cut the meeting short. But soon after, news reached her that Shizhou had fallen ill and been hospitalized due to glandular issues. Ms. Chen immediately took the earliest flight back.

Though Ms. Chen’s face bore traces of exhaustion like windblown frost, her overall spirit remained quite good. A wave of warmth and a twinge of guilt rose in Song Shizhou’s heart.

This was a surprisingly unfamiliar experience for her. In her memory, no elder had ever rushed to her side with such concern before.

“Mom, I’m sorry to trouble you to come all this way so late. I’ve made you worry.”

Chen Ting held her hand, her expression unusually solemn.

“You’re my only child. If I don’t worry about you, who else would I worry about?”

“I’ve already learned what happened at your studio.”

A bitter smile appeared on her face.

“I knew Song Lanyi was crazy, but I never imagined she’d go this far.”

“Shizhou, don’t worry about what comes next. I’ll handle it.”

Chen Ting led Song Shizhou toward the hospital lounge, which carried the unpleasant, slightly irritating scent of disinfectant.

They sat facing each other.

“It’s alright, Mom. You’re usually so busy with work. The police have already filed a case, so there shouldn’t be any further trouble. I can handle it.”

Chen Ting remained silent for a moment.

The atmosphere between them grew quiet. Song Shizhou knew Chen Ting hadn’t rushed back tonight just because of Song Lanyi’s matter.

There must be something more important she needed to say.

The white lounge lighting seemed harsh in the early morning hours. Amidst the glaring light, she heard Ms. Chen’s heartbroken voice:

“I’m sorry.”

Song Shizhou felt momentarily flustered.

Chen Ting embraced her.

“Shizhou, your life shouldn’t have been like this.”

“You’re so smart, so kind. You should have had a happy family and comfortable circumstances not this.”

“Not being hurt by so many people.”

Tear tracks actually appeared on Chen Ting’s face.

Having held high positions for years, someone even Mr. Bai regarded with caution, a noble-blooded enigma she shouldn’t have been this vulnerable, this sorrowful.

“It’s because we mothers failed to properly manage our relationship that you’ve suffered for it.”

Song Shizhou’s grip on her arm stiffened slightly.

Had Chen Ting said these words years earlier, when she’d first returned to the Song family, she might have been deeply moved.

But now she felt nothing in this world was inherently “should be.”

If something required “should” to obtain it, then most things in this world actually “shouldn’t” be.

People must keep living regardless.

So instead of breaking down in tears with Chen Ting, she simply took a tissue from her pocket and handed it over with a smile.

Chen Ting composed herself.

“Shizhou, actually from our first meeting, I knew your relationship with Miss Bai wasn’t simple.”

“You might worry I’d oppose your relationship, given your somewhat opposing positions. But whoever you love, no matter who they are, I would never stand in your way.”

Chen Ting’s voice trembled slightly.

“As long as you can be happy.”

As long as she could be happy.

Unlike the restroom filled with the scent of disinfectant, Miss Bai’s ward carried a faint fragrance of osmanthus. Because they had formed a bond, their pheromones were gracefully intertwining, seemingly unwilling to part even for a moment.

Song Shizhou’s mind was in turmoil.

Her relationship with Miss Bai simply shouldn’t be.

Yet the other woman stubbornly refused to let go, determined to turn their “shouldn’t be” into “should be.”

Such a complicated and perplexing relationship. Song Shizhou gave a faint smile, though her pheromones remained oblivious to their owner’s inner conflict, spreading and entwining freely even somewhat intimately.

Perhaps she should set aside these difficult thoughts for now.

Miss Bai was still deeply asleep, her peaceful face showing no awareness of this tangled dilemma. On the chair by the hospital bed lay Song Shizhou’s jacket, its sleeve clutched carefully in Bai Ruowei’s gently lowered hand. Even in unconscious slumber, she refused to let go, as if it were the sole source of her security.

Mid-spring in the Inner City had arrived unnoticed. The lingering cold waves that had persisted for months quietly receded, and the streets were now filled with pedestrians dressed in light spring attire.

In truth, spring had come much earlier, but this year’s weather in the Inner City had been unusually erratic. Several cold snaps in early March had left many severely ill.

The private hospital room was suffused with the delicate scent of flowers. A bouquet of pink-white lilies sat by the bedside, their blooming petals radiant and beautiful.

Mia, wearing a mask, sat beside Bai Ruowei.

“Removing a bond is a serious matter, it could cause lasting damage to your body. Bai, you shouldn’t rush into this.”

“Even if it’s to treat your gland abnormality, you should undergo more thorough examinations first, not act so hastily.”

Her tone was thick with concern.

“At least your condition isn’t too severe.”

Bai Ruowei lay on the hospital bed, her expression weary.

She wasn’t as frail as Mia feared. On the contrary, she looked quite well her cheeks slightly flushed, her eyes bright and alert.

Hearing this, she shook her head.

“I agreed to have the bond removed not to treat my gland, but to receive a newer, deeper mark.”

“So of course, the sooner the better.”

Silence settled between them, Mia’s quiet disbelief hanging in the air.

Only Bai Ruowei could say such insane things with such a calm expression.

Sometimes Mia even wondered if Bai Ruowei wasn’t actually as crazed and obsessive as she seemed perhaps she was simply this composed because she genuinely believed every word, meaning she wasn’t delusional at all.

Mia sighed and decided to change the subject.

“While you’ve been on leave, a lot has happened at the Surveillance Institute.”

The small table by the bed was piled high with fruit. Bai Ruowei casually picked up an orange, peeling it with effortless elegance, not a single drop of juice staining her fair fingertips.

Bai Ruowei smiled faintly.

“Is it related to Mr. Bai?”

Mia hesitated.

“Yes.”

“He suddenly fell seriously ill.”

“The doctor has already examined him. The diagnosis is a combination of several illnesses. The doctor said Mr. Bai has been overworking himself due to Chairman Chen’s return, so it’s possible he suddenly fell ill.”

“But my informant said.”

“His symptoms resemble poisoning.”

Bai Ruowei frowned slightly,

“Poison?”

Mia nodded, lowering her voice,

“Yes. Right now, the Surveillance Institute is conducting an internal investigation. Mr. Bai’s close aides suspect someone poisoned him.”

“Everyone who had contact with him recently has been thoroughly investigated, even his own daughter wasn’t spared. Fortunately, you haven’t been appearing at the Surveillance Institute much lately. Otherwise, if you got dragged into the investigation, it would be troublesome.”

“How about I apply for another half-month of sick leave for you? You can return after things settle down with Mr. Bai.”

Mia, the workaholic, the iron-willed careerist, wasn’t urging her to return to work. Bai Ruowei actually felt a bit unaccustomed to it.

But she truly couldn’t leave right now either.

“Alright, go ahead and apply for it then.”

Perhaps because she hadn’t seen Miss Bai for several days, Mia became unusually talkative. Mr. Bai’s critical condition was the biggest news at the Surveillance Institute, and Mia wanted to chat a bit more.

But Bai Ruowei seemed disinterested.

Her eyes lowered slightly, appearing utterly indifferent to these matters, so she could only offer a perfunctory smile.

Yet Mia inexplicably found that smile somewhat chilling.

A bouquet of lilies stood in the white vase on the table. Bai Ruowei had never been fond of overly vibrant colors, yet these flowers by her bedside were pink. She rested her hand on the cool leaves of the lilies and asked nonchalantly,

“Who sent these lilies?”

Mia’s face flushed inexplicably.

“Miss Song sent them.”

“She said pink better suits your current relationship, so she specifically bought pink lilies.”

As soon as the words were spoken, Bai Ruowei detected a faint fragrance of night-blooming cereus.

Even though the owner of that fragrance was still some distance away, she could sense that person’s presence with startling clarity.

This was because Song Shizhou had marked her once again.

Footsteps echoed softly in the hallway, step by step, as if treading upon Bai Ruowei’s heart, sending a warm current flowing through her.

That person said pink suited their current relationship.

The rich floral scent drifted into her nostrils a warm, sweet fragrance.

As if spring had truly arrived.

Their first meeting after waking was unexpectedly tinged with faint awkwardness.

Remembering this was the first time in so long that Song Shizhou had taken the initiative to visit her, Bai Ruowei’s fingers unconsciously tightened their grip on the bedsheet.

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