A Change of Husband - Chapter 125

“Can I ask one thing?”

Since Lydia had been informed of the death during the coronation, and had witnessed it herself, she couldn’t have missed that this was Asilie’s last request.

So, Lydia nodded her head.

“I’m not trying to burden you, but if I leave, please take care of that person. I’m not asking you to watch over them every day, just… sometimes, when you think of me, take a look at them the way you would look at me.”

“Sister.”

“Even without me, they’re a person with strong responsibility, and they will manage things well. But still, I would like someone to look after them in my place…”

Her calm words eventually blurred into tears.

Her heart hurt, but Lydia still didn’t want to cry with Asilie. She knew all too well that doing so would only hurt Asilie’s heart even more, weighing it down further.

“…Okay.”

With a restrained response, Asilie finally managed to smile faintly, as if relieved.

“Can you promise me?”

“Yes, I promise.”

“Thank you. And I love you, my sister. And… I’m really, really sorry…”

It hadn’t been long since that day, the day stained with tears.

That was when Asilie met her end.

Lydia did not cry.

Someone might have thought her heartless, but the truth was that no tears came out. What was certain was that she couldn’t find a reason for it.

The answer still lay with Agua Nale Roja, who was still staying in the royal palace.

“So, you’ve started to have doubts, haven’t you?”

“What do you mean?”

“You must have noticed it yourself. How you’ve become numb to emotions, how everything, even matters involving your own blood, now seems like an objective issue.”

She felt strange.

It was like when Asilie had been condemned to death—Lydia felt as if something was going to be condemned for her, too, and her heart sank with unease.

It was clear from her expression, but Agua Nale Roja didn’t seem to care for her feelings.

“Becoming sensitive to the flow of energy means you are becoming closer to nature, and at the same time, to the gods. But the more you do so, the more your emotions and senses as a human will dull.”

“…Does that mean I’m turning into a monster?”

“If you want to express it badly, yes. But, in a positive way, you could say you are becoming more attuned to nature.”

“So, I’m becoming something that’s not human.”

“It’s greedy to expect to remain the same after gaining such strength, Lydia. As I’ve told you before, strength always comes with a price.”

“Is there a solution?”

Lydia asked coldly.

If Agua Nale Roja was saying this, there must be some solution, and she wanted to hold onto even the smallest possibility.

Gaining power was a good thing, and using that power for something meaningful felt rewarding. However, she didn’t want to give up her humanity.

“If you’re asking for a solution, don’t you already know the answer?”

“What do you mean…”

“The basic principle of magic. When one side is strengthened, the other side weakens. Power flows like that.”

Sadly, Lydia immediately understood what Agua Nale Roja meant.

“If you stop using your power, your magic will gradually decline. The more transcendent the power, the faster it will disappear if not used. And as time passes, you’ll be able to regain what you lost. But you’ll have to sacrifice what you had.”

“Sacrifice what I had…?”

Then, she had to decide not to use magic anymore.

It was a very simple solution. Yet, Lydia couldn’t immediately decide to give up this power. She felt unfamiliar with herself for hesitating like this.

‘I need time.’

She had to run away.

The day Agua Nale Roja left the Astel royal palace, Lydia decided to leave for a while and went to find Esperad.

“Lady Grandier.”

“……”

“Lady Grandier!”

Lydia realized that the unfamiliar title “Lady Grandier” was referring to her after it was called twice.

Without looking back, she knew who it was, so she continued walking and replied.

“Why ‘Lady Grandier’? And what’s the matter?”

“I heard you’re leaving.”

“I can’t stay in the royal palace forever.”

“Why can’t you stay? Esperad—no, His Majesty the King would allow you to stay here.”

“I’m sure His Majesty would.”

What Lydia had promised Asilie was to visit him occasionally and check that he was doing well, not to stay nearby all the time.

Besides, Lydia believed that her constant presence near Esperad, as Asilie’s sister, would not have a positive effect on him, who needed stability for both the kingdom and himself. In fact, it could have a much more negative impact.

That was why she had decided to leave, and Esperad didn’t try to stop her.

“I just don’t feel like staying.”

“Why don’t you feel like it?”

“My presence would remind His Majesty of his sister. I don’t want that.”

“You must care for His Majesty so deeply.”

“What?”

Edgar’s tone was rather harsh.

Lydia looked at him in confusion. She hadn’t acted rudely nor had she teased him as she did when staying at the Medici mansion. So, she couldn’t figure out what had made him upset.

“…What are you talking about?”

Her question was legitimate, but Edgar’s face twisted with an even darker expression.

“So, you never considered me in the equation?”

“What?”

“You decided to leave thinking about how difficult it would be for Esperad to lose his sister, but you didn’t consider how hard it would be for me after you left. That’s what’s making me angry.”

“Sir… why?”

Too many thoughts tangled in her mind, and she couldn’t quite express them.

She might have been rude, but she felt she needed to clear things up, so she asked again.

“So, why did you think I should consider you?”

“Hah, you don’t know?”

Lydia thought it was a reasonable question, but to Edgar, it seemed like a huge insult.

His expression was so cold that it sent a chill down her spine.

“Did you really not know I liked you?”

“…What?”

“Yeah?”

“So, what exactly did you like?”

At that, Edgar let out a sound of disbelief, then immediately followed up with a question.

“I asked if you didn’t know that I liked ‘Lydia’.”

“What?”

“I said I liked you. I, liked you. So, I like ‘you.’”

Whether Lydia knew it or not, Edgar’s feelings had been there for a long time.

She couldn’t be sure when it started, but one thing was clear—Lydia was the first to hit him with a broom, and it was from that moment that he began to notice her, paying close attention to her.

Moreover, they kept running into each other quite often.

He had followed her at Asilie’s request, lost track of her, and often met her for short conversations after work when they both went to the same spot under the tree. He even saved her from a gunshot.

That was when he realized his feelings. When something threatened her, his body moved before he could think, to protect her.

She had started as a small girl, but at some point, Lydia had become more than just that to him.

“I was so worried.”

He thought her heart would be shattered after losing her older sister, so he made up all sorts of excuses to be near her and even changed shifts to keep watch.

Then, the decision she made, to leave Astel, caught him off guard.

He knew he could never be anything to her, but it felt so horribly miserable, and he was so angry. What frightened him most was that there was a real possibility that he might never see her again.

“Sir, me?”

“Who else would I be worried about? I can’t think of more than one person at a time, you know.”

“…Uh, I don’t know what to say because I’m so surprised.”

“I thought I made it pretty clear.”

“That’s because I…”

Startled by her own answer, Lydia could not help but finish her sentence reluctantly.

“Because I’m insensitive to emotions. And there’s no guarantee that I’ll change in the future.”

“That’s not true. Do you think I’m used to liking someone?”

Edgar frowned, as if frustrated.

“You’re the first, Lydia. I’ve never felt like this before, wanting to think about someone this much, wanting to be with them this much.”

Lydia looked at him with a sad expression. She knew better than anyone that Edgar Villian was a good person. She had once wondered if he had feelings for her, but at some point, she had stopped thinking about it, becoming numb to the idea. She had simply thought that her interest in people had faded away. In truth, it was for a different reason.

“I’m leaving soon.”

Lydia cowardly gave another reason, thinking it was the best way to reject him.

“I will follow you.”

But when Edgar said this, Lydia felt a chill run down her spine.

He would follow her? Even though she didn’t pay much attention to her surroundings, she knew Edgar was a valuable person to Astel. To hear him say that he would follow her without hesitation was absurd.

“I once thought it was crazy to risk everything for love, but now I don’t. If it takes time for Esperad to hold onto you, then he told me to take as much time off as I need. So, if you leave, I will follow you.”

“Do you know where I’m going?”

“I don’t know where you’re going, but I have to protect you, since you might be in danger.”

“I can take care of myself.”

“I know. You’re strong enough to take care of yourself, or even more than that.”

Lydia felt more and more embarrassed. She stammered as she asked him.

“Ah, no, how do you know that?”

“How could I not notice when you act so strangely? I’m so sensitive to your every move, Lydia. Even if I didn’t want to, I couldn’t miss it.”

“…Now, I wonder if I’ve been too insensitive.”

Edgar frowned at her words. He thought she was making excuses to keep rejecting him.

“You want to say it’s just your nature, but from what I’ve seen, you’re actually much more sensitive when it comes to things you care about.”

“……”

“Isn’t it natural for everyone to be insensitive to things they don’t care about? That can change.”

It was strange, yet impressive, that Edgar had a confidence that even he didn’t have. But it didn’t feel like a lie to convince her. Edgar wasn’t the type to lie, and at least here, he had known her for a long time.

As she thought this, Lydia realized that she, too, was certain that “Edgar would not lie to persuade me.”

‘Then…’

Maybe it was time to take a risk.

“So, you mean that if I start being aware of you and caring about you, things could change?”

“Isn’t that obvious?”

“Then let’s go.”

“Eh? Huh?”

Edgar’s face turned red with surprise at Lydia’s quick decision.

But Lydia had finally made up her mind. She wasn’t sure if this was a foolish risk or if she might end up just using him, but…

“The basic principle of magic: If one side is strengthened, the other weakens. Power moves like that.”

If the basic principle of magic also applied to humanity, Lydia could come to a more certain conclusion. The reason one side weakens when the other strengthens was simple: it’s because the weaker side is no longer being used as much. But this also meant that if both sides were used frequently, both could be strengthened.

After all, she had nothing to lose. Even though she hesitated about losing her magic, Lydia could never give up her humanity.

“Let’s go. If you’re confident, try to make me someone who’s sensitive to you, who’s aware of you. I don’t know if that’s possible, but.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Your face says you don’t think that’s possible, though…”

Lydia looked at him with a challenging expression, as if daring him to prove it. To Edgar, she seemed cute. He had come here angry, resentful that she wasn’t considering him at all. He had come to express his feelings, but now he was pleased that she had given him the challenge to prove it.

Edgar smiled faintly.

Everyone around them knew, but he was the type of person who would follow through until the end once he set his mind on something. And he had never failed.

Of course, Lydia was the most unpredictable person he knew, but he was confident.

“You’ll regret being so sure, Lydia.”

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