What to Do If Beta Cannot Be Marked? - Chapter 16

“Then how are you feeling now?” Chi Jinxian immediately scrambled off the bed, forgetting to even slip on the shoes by his feet, his face full of concern.

He had thought there must be a reason why he couldn’t reach Xiao Lu all this time. While he initially suspected illness, before actually speaking with Xiao Lu, Chi Jinxian didn’t want his pessimistic thoughts to become reality.

Perhaps the pain had already subsided, as Xiao Lu’s breathing steadied on the other end: “I was joking with you. I did take medicine tonight, but it wasn’t serious. I was just exercising in the gym earlier.”

If one listened carefully, there seemed to be a very soft chuckle in his voice, though Chi Jinxian couldn’t be sure. If true, this person was truly wicked making someone who cared about him worry like that. Yet Chi Jinxian found himself unable to get angry, instead slumping in relief onto the edge of the bed as he finally remembered to put on his shoes.

Feigning complaint, he said: “Xiao Lu, you’re really terrible.” As he spoke, he leaned back and collapsed onto the soft bedding. “How could you scare me like that? Apologize right now.”

This time, a clear light laugh came through the phone. “Sorry, Xiao Chi.” After a pause, he suddenly lowered his voice and added, “Little Rose.”

His tone was remarkably deep, as if he hadn’t intended to use that nickname yet desperately wanted to say it anyway. Caught between these conflicting impulses, the resulting delivery felt somewhat awkward and uncharacteristic.

Though he heard it clearly, Chi Jinxian’s light breathing suddenly hitched. His bright eyes stared at the ceiling, and for a moment he actually felt as if he were talking to Lu Zhi.

For that brief instant, Xiao Lu’s voice and manner of speaking had sounded exactly like Lu Zhi.

Chi Jinxian hadn’t expected this mere fantasy to make his heart race and head spin as if he’d committed some misdeed. He rolled over to bury his face in the mattress, grabbing the blanket to cover his head as if someone might witness his shameful thoughts and laugh at him.

But this felt terribly unfair to Xiao Lu. During their previous calls he’d never experienced such confusion, and he didn’t understand why it was happening today.

Chi Jinxian attributed it to not having spoken with Brother Lu today.

Yet this was his own issue he really shouldn’t project these feelings onto Xiao Lu, who was his best friend in the virtual world.

The honest Chi Jinxian called out Xiao Lu’s name from under the covers. When the other responded, Chi Jinxian began slowly apologizing, confessing his “impure thoughts” before ending with an unrepentant burst of laughter.

He knew Xiao Lu wouldn’t get angry.

While today’s situation was unprecedented, this wasn’t the first time he’d said something like “I wish Xiao Lu were Lu Zhi” whenever Chi Jinxian fretted over how to cheer up Lu Zhi, he would consult his trusted advisor. Xiao Lu had always said he could be approached about anything anytime. Since Xiao Lu was ever-responsive and constantly available, after discussing strategies for “dealing with” Lu Zhi the next day, Chi Jinxian would often joke: “Xiao Lu, if only my brother would reply to me like you do every day and treat me as well as you do. I really wish you were Lu Zhi, hahaha.”

Each time, Xiao Lu would laugh along before soberly reminding him: “I’m afraid that wouldn’t work. What you want with Lu Zhi is romance, while what we have is friendship, they’re fundamentally different. Your hypothesis doesn’t hold up.”

He thought Xiao Lu would let his “hahaha” slide again today, but unexpectedly, the moment his words fell, the other end of the line suddenly went silent.

Chi Jinxian, who was still burying his face under the quilt, paused slightly in his movements. He even opened his eyes in the dim darkness beneath the covers, an inexplicable unease stirring in his heart.

Just as he was about to say something, he heard Xiao Lu speak in his uniquely gentle and calm tone: “While chatting with me, you thought of Lu Zhi.”

Chi Jinxian sat up on the bed again, nervously fiddling with the corner of the quilt. “No, I.”

“Xiao Chi,” the other interrupted him, his voice betraying no hint of displeasure, as if they were merely having an ordinary conversation. “Although I know… what do you like about Lu Zhi?”

Hearing that the other wasn’t angry, Chi Jinxian relaxed and said, “Huh? Do I need a reason to like someone?”

Xiao Lu replied, “Yes.”

His tone was so insistent and persistent, as if the person Chi Jinxian liked was him, and he absolutely had to know the reason why.

Whether or not he noticed the tone, Chi Jinxian laughed and said, “Oh, I really don’t know. It’s just that the first time I saw him… my heart raced, my face felt hot. Even though I was bold when giving him the love letter, I was so nervous my limbs almost stiffened sigh, you’ve never met Brother Lu. If you had, you’d definitely understand why I like him. It’s not just because of his looks, haha many people say Lu Zhi is a very cold person, but I think he’s gentle. He must have a gentleness that no one else can see, something hidden deep in his bones. He must be a gentleman.”

He seemed to be picturing Lu Zhi in his mind, his voice growing more and more yearning as he spoke. Xiao Lu fell silent again.

After a long while, he finally said, somewhat incredulously, “A gentleness that no one else can see, and only you, this rose, can perceive it?”

Xiao Lu had almost never spoken in such a disbelieving tone before. Chi Jinxian found it amusing and started pounding the bed, laughing out loud with “hahaha.”

His voice barely coherent, he said, “What’s wrong? Isn’t this rose of mine pretty?”

“Pretty,” Xiao Lu replied.

“You’ve never seen me, so how do you know I’m pretty?” Chi Jinxian even added a teasing tone to his words.

Xiao Lu played along: “I guessed.”

Chi Jinxian laughed again, clutching the quilt. After a while, he said, “But Xiao Lu, do you believe in fate? I have this feeling about Brother Lu, that we must have met when we were kids. Maybe I even said something like ‘I want you to be my wife’ back then.”

“Then your ambitions are quite lofty.”

Chi Jinxian chuckled foolishly. He was certain he hadn’t met Lu Zhi as a child. If they had known each other back then, he wouldn’t have had to chase after him for so long it was too pathetic. So, he was just saying these things for fun. Chi Jinxian didn’t dwell on these unrealistic thoughts any longer.

After a while, Xiao Lu said he wasn’t feeling well and was tired, so they ended the call. Before hanging up, Chi Jinxian repeatedly emphasized that he should take care of himself. He sincerely hoped today’s situation would be the last time it happened it was truly frightening, especially when he realized he might actually lose contact with the person. At that moment, his entire heart felt as if it were being squeezed.

Xiao Lu said there wouldn’t be such situations again. Even if he truly had an episode, before the pain overwhelmed him, he would take out his phone and send a message to Little Rose. Chi Jinxian scolded him for speaking inauspiciously and told him not to talk nonsense. Xiao Lu agreed to everything, and only then did they bid each other goodnight and rest.

But without Lu Zhi’s goodnight, Chi Jinxian was destined to sleep restlessly that night. The next day, he woke up early, finished breakfast early, and arrived at school early.

On the way, he remembered he needed to wake up his uncle, so he condescended to give Qi Suiyi a call to rouse him.

By the time he finished the call, he had just reached the teaching building. Chi Jinxian bounded up the stairs in a few large strides. Entering the classroom, he thought it was still quite early and Lu Zhi surely hadn’t arrived yet, so he could slip something into Lu Zhi’s desk drawer to cheer him up.

But as soon as he pushed the door open and stepped inside, he saw Lu Zhi just pulling out his chair to sit down. On his desk lay what could only be described as a lavish breakfast.

A few scattered classmates were already in the classroom. Chi Jinxian closed the back door and glanced at the breakfast on Lu Zhi’s desk.

Lu Zhi was also looking at it, seemingly a bit puzzled, but his expression appeared relatively calm, without much surprise.

When he heard movement beside him, he lifted his gaze and saw Chi Jinxian, who was clearly a few steps behind him, carrying his backpack. Only then did his eyebrows gradually furrow as his eyes returned to the breakfast.

Clutching his backpack tightly, Chi Jinxian hesitated over whether to ask but, still standing by his seat unable to sit down, he finally spoke up: “Lu-ge, did you bring breakfast today? Why aren’t you eating?”

Lu Zhi’s frown deepened, and he didn’t even want to let his gaze linger on the desk for another second.

“It’s not mine,” he said. “Throw it away.” After giving the order, he habitually added a polite thank you.

“Huh? It’s not Lu-ge’s?” Chi Jinxian sat down with a sigh of relief. He had thought Lu Zhi was willing to accept something from someone else and that someone wasn’t him, which would have been a big problem! Fortunately, it wasn’t. He said, “It’s such a waste to throw it away.”

Lu Zhi looked up, and Chi Jinxian immediately broke into a cheerful smile. “Alrighty then.”

He reached out to take the items from Lu Zhi’s desk, but he had been taught since childhood that wasting food was shameful. Once, when he was little, he had gone hungry for a meal because he didn’t finish his food, his father was very strict and impartial, saying if he didn’t eat this meal, he wouldn’t need to eat the next one either. Since then, Chi Jinxian had obediently become a model student who cherished food.

After bringing the breakfast to his own seat, Chi Jinxian pretended to consult Lu Zhi: “Lu-ge, how about giving the breakfast to my deskmate? Baixiao can eat it. It’s better than throwing it away.”

Without waiting for actual consent, he went ahead and placed the items on Jiang Baixiao’s desk.

Lu Zhi didn’t say a word, not even sparing a glance in that direction.

When Jiang Baixiao arrived and saw such a large surprise, he initially thought Chi Jinxian had decided to ditch Lu Zhi and “pursue” him instead. He felt no joy, only shock. Trembling, he said thank you, unsure whether he should actually touch it.

Two minutes later, the food turned out to be truly delicious.

After the first class ended, a person appeared at the back window of Class 10, Grade 12 right by Chi Jinxian’s window.

A boy stood there holding a small bag of snacks. The hallway was crowded between classes, so he stood there somewhat awkwardly, looking as if he wanted to push open the back door but didn’t dare, lingering instead in front of that window.

Chi Jinxian noticed and opened the window with one hand, asking, “What’s up, classmate? Are you looking for someone?”

Hearing someone speak to him, the boy immediately looked over, nodding and stammering, “Ah, I’m looking for Lu Zhi, Senior Lu.”

As he spoke, his gaze had already drifted toward Lu Zhi, who was sitting in the back row wearing headphones and reading a book.

Chi Jinxian followed his gaze and glanced back. For some reason, Chi Jinxian felt extremely awkward.

In two years of pursuing someone, he had never encountered such a situation. Perhaps it was because he was too well-known, but since Lu Zhi didn’t like him, he was seen as non-threatening, so others never bothered to confront him. Chi Jinxian had never directly faced his own rival in love.

“Oh, looking for Brother Lu,” Chi Jinxian turned around and called out to Lu Zhi, “Brother Lu.”

Lu Zhi lifted his eyes to look at him. Chi Jinxian shifted slightly to the side, as if hinting that someone was looking for him. The latter didn’t look outside but lowered his gaze again.

Jiang Baixiao’s expression as he looked at Chi Jinxian was indescribable.

How could he help a rival call out to the person he liked and even make the person he liked look at the rival?

Seeing that Lu Zhi ignored Chi Jinxian, the boy felt that the forum posts were right, Chi Jinxian had no chance of developing anything further with Lu Zhi. And what Lu Wan said was also true: Chi Jinxian was just persistently clinging to Lu Zhi, with nothing else to show for it.

Cheng Fei, who had believed Lu Wan’s words from yesterday “You could also learn from Chi Jinxian and pursue Lu Zhi” suddenly felt a bit more confident. It was a fair competition; whatever Chi Jinxian could do, he could do too.

Cheng Fei took a step closer to the window and asked softly, “Senior Lu did you eat the breakfast I gave you today?”

“Cough.” Chi Jinxian took a sip of water but failed to wash down his embarrassment; the resulting cough only made him feel more awkward.

Hearing him cough, Jiang Baixiao, as if infected, started coughing too. The combined sound effect was quite noticeable.

Lu Zhi removed one headphone, his gaze cold as it passed through the window. “Threw it away,” he replied, then added, “Sorry, but don’t send anything over. I don’t need it. Thank you.”

Cheng Fei wasn’t discouraged after all, Chi Jinxian had been rejected for two years. Sophomores and seniors weren’t in the same building, and class was about to start. Ignoring the rejection he had just received, Cheng Fei shoved the snacks in his hand through the window and placed them on Lu Zhi’s desk. He turned and ran without noticing how Lu Zhi immediately moved his textbook away the moment his arm reached in, and Lu Zhi himself shifted aside as if avoiding the plague.

Seeing the boy leave, Chi Jinxian and Jiang Baixiao both sighed in relief simultaneously.

“Chi Cash,” Jiang Baixiao said after calming down, leaning close to Chi Jinxian and grabbing his shoulder, gritting his teeth and whispering, “Are you deliberately sabotaging me?”

Chi Jinxian waved his hands repeatedly, whispering back, “No, I didn’t know someone was pursuing him… let alone that he’d come looking right after class.”

Jiang Baixiao asked, “He called him ‘senior’ is he a sophomore or a freshman?”

“How would I know?” Chi Jinxian scratched his head, still feeling a bit awkward.

If he had known this would happen, he would have rather wasted his second meal since growing up and thrown away that breakfast. Maybe then he wouldn’t feel so mortified.

But that wasn’t important. At the moment, Jiang Baixiao was very curious about one thing.

He asked, “Is this how you react to your own rival in love?”

Chi Jinxian was puzzled. “How?”

“Aren’t you jealous?” Jiang Baixiao asked. “Shouldn’t you take some action?”

“Why would I be jealous?” Chi Jinxian gave him a strange look and muttered quietly, “Even if a rival appears, would Brother Lu suddenly like them? That’s impossible, right?”

Jiang Baixiao: “…”

He had to admit, the guy had a pretty optimistic mindset.

After pondering for a moment, Chi Jinxian lowered his voice even further to avoid being overheard: “I’m just pursuing him. Brother Lu doesn’t like me anyway, what measures could I take? What right do I have to intervene?”

Tch, so that’s the real reason. Jiang Baixiao clicked his tongue and shook his head with a sigh, reaching out to pat his shoulder.

Lu Zhi watched the two of them whispering incessantly up front as if they had nothing better to do, while his peripheral vision kept catching glimpses of the items on his own desk. The veins at his Temple Points twitched faintly with restrained irritation.

Then his lips moved slightly as he called out with extreme indifference: “Chi Jinxian.”

“Ah.” Chi Jinxian responded instinctively before turning around. “Huh?”

Lu Zhi stared at him without speaking. Suddenly comprehending, Chi Jinxian went “Oh” and said: “I’ll go throw them away right now.”

He gathered the snacks and dumped them all on Jiang Baixiao as if he were a trash can. Before his deskmate could react, Chi Jinxian preemptively lectured with grave sincerity: “Wasting food is bad.”

Jiang Baixiao: “…”

“Is this how you pursue someone?” Suddenly, this question came from the back row. Chi Jinxian instantly turned to look at Lu Zhi, unsure whether he had been the one to say it, completely bewildered. Jiang Baixiao immediately straightened up and covered his ears, though in reality he was practically growing elf ears, both standing straight up attentively.

Lu Zhi stared at Chi Jinxian with visible annoyance, stating just before class began: “If someone comes looking for me, will you block them?”