We Are Filthy, Born From Mud - Chapter 28

Chapter 28: Yes, She is Capricious. You Are Just Looking in a Mirror, While I…

Along the way, Zong Yougu did not speak again. She leaned her head against the car window, quietly watching everything outside, a faint trace of a smile visible at the corners of her mouth.

Zong Liangu likewise remained silent, leaning back casually in her seat, motionless.

Thus, the journey home was filled with silence, save for the mechanical hum of the engine.

Hu Yinghua observed Zong Yougu through the rearview mirror from time to time. She felt that Yougu must be “angry into a daze”; even though Yougu was smiling, her heart had to be filled with fury. If she became so discouraged that she couldn’t recover, it would be a disaster. Zong Yougu’s career wasn’t just her own; it was tied to Hu Yinghua’s future as well. This job was vital to her; she really didn’t want to go back to flipping egg pancakes on a street stall.

Thinking of this, Hu Yinghua decisively plastered on a smile.

She said rather flatteringly, “Sister Yougu, have you not looked at your phone these past two days? Did you know that your reputation has been great lately? The level of discussion about you is so high!”

Zong Yougu tilted her chin up with a hint of pride, signaling Hu Yinghua to continue.

“A drama was recently released, right? The ratings are good. Although you only have a small role, you played it brilliantly! Do you remember? It was the leaked footage from this drama that made you go viral once! I knew following you was the right choice—following Sister Yougu, my future is also bright!”

“Hmm.” Zong Yougu squeezed a sound out of her nose.

Although she hadn’t yet remembered which drama it was, she enjoyed hearing others praise her. So, she continued to ask, “Then where do you think I acted well in that drama?”

“Is there even a need to ask? Sister Yougu, your body language in this drama was exceptional—so expressive. Especially that final leap and fall—it was incredible. To turn a few lines of text in a script into that kind of effect… you are truly amazing. I will always support you.”

Zong Yougu rubbed her temples; she finally remembered.

That segment was performed by Zong Liangu. Liangu had performed it brilliantly, to her heart’s content.

She turned and saw the smiling eyes of Zong Liangu, and a sense of stagnation formed in her chest. Her rubbing of her temples became more forceful, and the smile on her face gradually faded. For some reason, hearing Hu Yinghua’s praise didn’t make her happy; it actually felt a bit piercing.

Clearly, she and Zong Liangu were the same person. Had her pettiness reached the point where she was even jealous of herself?

“Sister Yougu, you are just specifically talented—”

“Drive safely. Focus on the car,” Zong Liangu, sitting to the side, spoke up.

Zong Yougu turned only to meet Zong Liangu’s somewhat playful gaze. She saw the other woman raise an eyebrow as if in a provocation.

She leaned back heavily into the seat with a thud. The tiny emotions hidden beneath her conceit began to seep out.

Su Tongguo. Liao Qinghe. Zong Liangu.

The three names swirled in her mind.

“Sister Yougu, there’s a lot of traffic ahead. Is it okay if I drop you off here?”

Zong Yougu leaned her head away without speaking. Zong Liangu responded cheerfully and then yanked Yougu out of the car.

“You are very agitated right now,” Zong Liangu’s calm voice sounded in Yougu’s ear.

“Me? Why would I be agitated?” Zong Yougu said airily.

Zong Yougu’s pace was fast. She urgently wanted to go home, back to that small, broken house. Zong Liangu shook her head with a smile and followed behind.

She was Zong Yougu, and Zong Yougu was her; how could she not understand what Yougu was thinking? Agitation, resentment, and complacency—these emotions must be crashing into each other in Yougu’s heart. Zong Liangu had experienced such moments before; no one understood Yougu’s current feelings better than she did. Almost masochistically, she craved to see Yougu’s current ugly state.

She chuckled softly. Seeing herself being left far behind by Zong Yougu, she quickened her pace to keep up.

Zong Liangu walked upstairs with a light step and skillfully entered the passcode. With a click, the door opened.

Before her eyes could adjust to the darkness of the room, Zong Yougu embraced her tightly, her arms circling Liangu’s waist. Yougu buried her entire face in Liangu’s hair.

Zong Liangu did nothing; she just stood there. Her hand smoothed Yougu’s hair stroke by stroke, the thick, black strands flowing through her fingers.

Zong Liangu sighed and said, “You weren’t like this right after the audition ended. You were so confident then.”

Zong Yougu didn’t speak. She pushed Liangu away, wiping her tears and snot onto Liangu’s clothes.

“I saw the director put my materials together with Su Tongguo’s. It means my audition was excellent. Even if I lose out, I won’t be disappointed, it’s just…”

Zong Yougu looked away.

Zong Liangu, however, forcefully turned Yougu’s face back, forcing her to make eye contact. Her eyes narrowed, thick lashes obscuring most of them. “Just what?”

Zong Yougu pushed Liangu away again and took a deep breath.

“I hate you. I hate Su Tongguo. I hate all of you. I hate that I can’t take this kind of shortcut.”

“All of you? What did I do wrong again?” A voice full of mirth echoed in the room. Zong Liangu stood aside with her arms crossed. Her gaze remained glued to Zong Yougu, her eyes licking up and down, unwilling to miss a single detail.

“Your experiences from your past life make you a natural at acting. If that’s not a shortcut, what is? You must have been very smug hearing Hu Yinghua praise you.” Zong Yougu, in a fit of rage, threw a pillow from the bed at Zong Liangu. “As for Su Tongguo, why didn’t I enjoy such preferential treatment when I was dating Liao Qinghe? This is not fair at all.”

As soon as the words fell, a sharp laughter rang out in the room. Zong Liangu laughed from the bottom of her heart, even crouching down while leaning against the wall.

After a long time, she finally used her sleeve to wipe away the tears brought on by laughter.

“Are you done venting? You don’t need to be angry at all.” Zong Liangu sat down in a chair. Lifting her head, she looked directly at Zong Yougu. “You should know very well in your heart that even if Liao Qinghe had wanted to give you something back then, you wouldn’t have accepted it.”

Zong Yougu turned her head away petulantly.

Zong Liangu chuckled twice. “Because your pride wouldn’t have allowed you to. To you, Liao Qinghe’s actions would have been no different from charity, and you never accept charity from others. And…”

Zong Liangu reached out, and Zong Yougu was pulled forward a few steps.

She continued, “And everything has a price. If you had accepted Liao Qinghe’s charity, you would have had to maintain that relationship…”

“Holding hands.”

Zong Liangu’s hand slowly climbed up Zong Yougu’s wrist, moving up the arm.

“Kissing.”

Zong Liangu slowly lifted Yougu’s hand and placed a kiss on the back of it.

“Even more intimate acts.”

With a forceful pull from Liangu, Zong Yougu crashed into her embrace.

“You hate the touch of others. You aren’t good at handling these situations, and you find the intimacy of others hard to endure. So even if such an opportunity were before you, you wouldn’t step onto that shortcut. And, you don’t need to hate me.”

Zong Liangu’s fingers wove through the ends of Yougu’s hair, but her gaze drifted into the distance. She said, “My experience was never a shortcut. I was always taking the long way around. There’s really no need for you to envy me. Besides, you are me, and I am you.”

Zong Yougu gave a soft “hmm” and didn’t speak again. Her fingers likewise twirled the ends of Liangu’s hair. Liangu’s hair was as coarse and stiff as hers, feeling like both wild grass and a steel wool ball.

She said, “Did the director ever tell you? When she used to comb my hair, she jokingly told me that people with stiff hair have stiff tempers—as stubborn and foul as a donkey. Now it seems she was right.”

Zong Yougu didn’t wait for Liangu to answer; she spoke as if to herself, “Zong Liangu, I really like you. I love you.”

“Hmm, I love you too. I love you as I love myself,” Zong Liangu’s voice carried a hint of a smile.

Zong Liangu’s gaze returned to Zong Yougu. She didn’t miss a single subtle change on Yougu’s face, observing with great interest.

Zong Yougu shook her head. “It’s not the same. You are just observing me. You are just using me to observe yourself. In the end, you are still loving yourself. But I am different. Besides the love for myself, I love ‘you’.”

A momentary daze appeared on Zong Liangu’s face, but she quickly recovered her smile. “What are you babbling about? I don’t understand. In my last life, I did manual labor; my brain isn’t good.”

Zong Liangu reached out and poked Yougu’s head.

“I mean, you are just looking in a mirror, while I want to reach out and break through that mirror to touch you.” Zong Yougu’s fingers locked with the other’s.

Like a small animal, Zong Yougu’s nose sniffed along Liangu’s neck. Finally, their identical noses touched, and their lips met in a long, lingering kiss.

“You are my shortcut,” Zong Yougu thought silently.

“How is this different from taking a shortcut!” Su Tongguo covered her face tightly, her fingertips trembling slightly.

“Tongguo, there’s no need to be so worked up. This is just a small matter.” Liao Qinghe tried to step forward to hug Su Tongguo, but was rejected.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to blame you. It’s hard to describe how I feel right now. I feel very… I feel very dishonorable, do you understand?”

Liao Qinghe shook his head. “What’s the big deal? It’s just a role. Your moral standards are just too high.”

Su Tongguo sat in the chair as if her strength had left her. Using the momentum, the chair slid a long way back. Now, there was a gap of three people between Su Tongguo and Liao Qinghe.

“It’s true that I really wanted this role, because I wanted to prove myself, to prove I have ability. I wanted to win against Zong Yougu.”

“But looking at the result, you did win. Connections are also a part of ability.” Liao Qinghe slowly spun his stool.

“Qinghe, this isn’t just a competition between Zong Yougu and me. I can’t help but think about how many people lost their chance to even compete because of me. I feel uneasy, dishonorable, and deeply guilty.” Su Tongguo closed her eyes wearily. “I never dated you for your resources; I never lacked those. What I loved was your innocence, your cheerfulness.”

Su Tongguo opened her eyes and said, “Now that things have come to this, I think we should reconsider our relationship. Regardless of the outcome, I will not act in this drama. Under these circumstances, I can’t play Lin Lingwan well.”