Waiting for You for a Long Time, But You Haven't Arrived - Chapter 18

“Say something to me—”

After Jiang Qionghua slammed the door and left, she hadn’t walked many steps before she became dizzy with rage.

Holding her forehead, she stood in the snow, unable to calm down. She didn’t know what had gotten into Ming Yishu today; the girl was so stubborn she would rather stay in a freezing woodshed than leave with her.

Does Ming Yishu not have a mouth? Why won’t she say even a single soft word?

No matter how she thought about it, Jiang Qionghua couldn’t understand. Where was the obedient Ming Yishu? In the past, Ming Yishu was always the first to apologize and give in. Even if Jiang Qionghua lost her temper, it was Ming Yishu who would come to comfort her first.

Every time, every single time, she had been so good. Why was she being so defiant today?

Jiang Qionghua’s head throbbed painfully; she gritted her teeth so hard they nearly shattered. She suddenly remembered the last time she woke in the middle of the night and had designs on Ming Yishu’s body. Even then, when her actions and words had been excessive, Ming Yishu hadn’t thrown a tantrum. Instead, she had been the first to soften and had even tried to make her stay… So why, this time, when she had only spoken a few harsh words, did the girl have such a great temper?

She is truly becoming lawless!

Jiang Qionghua failed to bring Ming Yishu back, and she was too angry to go back herself. In the middle of the night, she stood alone in the snow for a long time. It wasn’t until the night snow covered her shoulders that she silently brushed it off.

Fine.

Perhaps having calmed down in the cold, Jiang Qionghua rarely felt the urge to try again, to see if she could coax Ming Yishu back. She thought to herself: Ming Yishu is a junior; she has always been obedient. It isn’t impossible to let her throw a rare tantrum. I am the elder; giving her a little tolerance won’t make me lose face.

“Yishu, the woodshed is too cold. I don’t want you to suffer. Come back with me, alright?”

These words could be considered “lowering her voice” to coax her. Jiang Qionghua had never spoken to anyone in such a soft tone in her life. As soon as she spoke, she actually felt a bit embarrassed.

She immediately cleared her throat to hide her awkwardness, then raised her voice again, sounding stern but internally weak: “I am not begging you. I simply feel distressed for you. Do you not know how to care for yourself? What’s wrong with giving in? Don’t you trust me the most?”

The woodshed was silent. No one answered.

Could she be asleep?

It’s so cold in there, yet she can actually sleep?

Jiang Qionghua didn’t realize at all that Ming Yishu’s shoulder was injured, nor did she pay much attention to her heart condition. She simply thought the other was asleep and ignoring her, so she took a step forward and knocked on the door to remind her: “Yishu, stop sleeping. Get up and follow me back to the room.”

Again, no response.

Why is she not saying a word? If it were any other day, Jiang Qionghua would have long since lost her patience. But having stood in the snow for so long, her thoughts and patience had grown. Even though the person inside refused to return a single word, she didn’t push the door open directly.

“I know you feel wronged and your heart is hurting.” Jiang Qionghua warmed her hands, realizing she had also lost sensation from the cold. She said, “Yishu, I have been standing here waiting for you. It is cold outside, and it is cold inside. Stop throwing a tantrum. Let’s go back together and warm up.”

No one could respond to her anymore; she was met only with a long, heavy silence.

Jiang Qionghua looked up at the night sky. The snow fell rustling, a subtle chill landing in her eyes. Her heart began to feel sour and uneasy. No one had ever made her wait so long in the snow, nor could anyone make her stay up all night entangled like this.

Only Ming Yishu could do it.

Perhaps, without her knowing when it started, her concern for Ming Yishu went much deeper than her words suggested. Words cannot reveal a person’s heart, but actions can.

Feeling the cold, Jiang Qionghua understood. Even if her head didn’t hurt that much, she still wanted Ming Yishu to stay with her.

“Yishu.”

This was the third time Jiang Qionghua called her name. But this time, she didn’t continue to persuade her to leave. Instead, she let out a long, pent-up sigh. She knew that under these circumstances, Ming Yishu probably wouldn’t give in easily. The girl was too resolute; once she decided on something, it was hard to change. She should say something else to coax her.

“Don’t you want to ask why I treated you that way?” Jiang Qionghua endured the feeling, finally making a decision to tell the past she least wanted to look back on. “Sixteen years ago, I met the worst person in the world. She lied to me, used me for ten years, and almost killed me. So all these years, I have hated intensely, fearing betrayal again. Whenever I think of it, I can’t control my temper, and my head hurts terribly. The madness I didn’t release in the imperial prison has come back as retribution in recent years. You are right to throw a tantrum at me. Sometimes, your aunt truly treats you poorly… even strikes you…”

As if actively peeling back an old scar, Jiang Qionghua’s fingers trembled. She gently rested her hand on the door panel, touching the coarse texture of the wood.

“These old stories—I don’t tell them to anyone else. If they dared to mention them, I would dare to kill them all.” Jiang Qionghua pursed her thin lips, lowering her eyes to hide her sadness. “No one in the world dares to uncover my places of grief—but today, I have told them all to you honestly.”

Jiang Qionghua immersed herself in the pain of the past, and as she spoke, she shook her head bitterly: “Forget it, what does it matter if you know? I’m not doing this for your pity, at most, it’s just to coax you home.”

There was still no answer from inside.

Having finished recounting the past, Jiang Qionghua felt as though she had stripped off her clothes for someone to see; she was exposed and extremely uncomfortable.

She pushed the door open gently, averting her eyes, not daring to look at Ming Yishu. She only reached one hand inside and said softly: “If you don’t despise my past, then take my hand. Then I will know your heart.”

Time slowly slipped away. Jiang Qionghua silently counted the seconds. She failed to wait for the other person’s hand. Unwilling to give up, she waited a bit longer.

Still waiting, there was still no response.

Finally, Jiang Qionghua realized something was wrong. No matter what, Ming Yishu wouldn’t treat her like this. She had held her hand out until it was sore without receiving a single word in return; it was impossible for her to be just sleeping or throwing a tantrum.

When that possibility dawned on her, a bone-chilling cold rose within her. The hand she had extended into the door was frozen stiff. The inside of the woodshed felt even colder than the snowy ground outside—so cold it made one feel lost.

“Ming Yishu!”

Jiang Qionghua pushed the door open violently and lunged toward the interior of the woodshed—Ming Yishu was collapsed on the freezing floor. Her thin clothes seemed to be covered in frost, her collar was slightly disheveled, and she had long since lost consciousness.

Separated by only a thin wooden door, the person inside couldn’t hear her words at all. All of her sincere confessions had fallen into the snow.

No wonder there was no response.

But at this moment, Jiang Qionghua couldn’t blame her at all. She rushed forward to shield her in her arms, taking off her own cloak to cover her, then pulled her closer into her embrace, trying to use her own temperature to warm Ming Yishu.

Jiang Qionghua had just stood in the snow for a long time, but when she touched Ming Yishu’s hand, she found that Ming Yishu was actually colder than she was. She was so cold she seemed to have no spark of life at all… as if she were dead.

The moment that thought emerged, Jiang Qionghua’s breath hitched. She lowered her head, leaning close to Ming Yishu’s nose, trying to feel her breath.

Perhaps Ming Yishu’s breath was too faint; Jiang Qionghua couldn’t feel it at all. For the first time in her life, she was terrified, experiencing what is known as “profound anxiety.”

“Yishu, say something to me—”

Jiang Qionghua’s voice shook as she pressed against her back, as if by rubbing the girl into her own flesh and blood, she could make them both warm. She held her tightly, feeling heartache to the extreme.

Blood.

Jiang Qionghua keenly smelled the scent of blood. It wasn’t pungent, but very cold. She slowly lifted her hand and saw that the place where she had touched Ming Yishu was already stained with blood.

Right, Ming Yishu’s shoulder and back were still injured.

She really was unfit to be an elder; she had actually forgotten this and driven her to the woodshed to freeze. Jiang Qionghua was filled with immense regret. She had spent half her life in blood and storms; seeing blood was as common as seeing water. The blood of her enemies even gave her a sense of pleasure… but she had never felt that blood on her hands was so piercing to the eye.

It’s okay. The blood is still flowing, which means she is still alive. If she isn’t dead, there is still time to save her.

Jiang Qionghua turned toward the snowy night and raised her voice: “Someone, call the physician!”

As the master of the Prime Minister’s residence, all the servants and subordinates had been waiting for her summons since she went to the woodshed alone. Even if no one dared to step forward or eavesdrop on her words, the secret guards remained hidden nearby to ensure her safety.

Her voice wasn’t loud, so as not to disturb the person in her arms, but it was enough for the secret guard to pass the message down.

Half an hour later, Jiang Qionghua had carried Ming Yishu back to the room. The frantic physicians were kneeling all over the floor.

“When Miss Ming suffers from a heart condition, she must take her medicine immediately. Delaying it again and again means she might never wake up. This time, she didn’t take her medicine in time, and she has injuries; the illness has reached a very serious stage…”

Jiang Qionghua interrupted: “Nonsense, I gave her medicine today. How could she still be like this?”

the white-bearded old physician asked, “How much was used? When the condition worsened, was the dosage increased?”

It seemed—she only ate one pill.

When the condition worsened—she had even thrown the medicine away.

Jiang Qionghua fell silent, her brows furrowed. Various emotions blocked her chest, making her feel irritable again.

She raised her hand to call Su Qian’er over and asked, “How does Ming Yishu usually take her medicine?”

Su Qian’er knelt and replied, “The young lady takes two pills a day. If her heart condition flares up, she takes an extra one.”

Jiang Qionghua’s heart felt even more uncomfortable, as if a thorn were stuck in it, making her want to gouge out that piece of flesh to use the physical pain to suppress the unease.

The physician asked again, “Could the Prime Minister please show me the medicine? If we have the medicine she usually takes, it will be easier to treat Miss Ming in time.”

“I threw it away.” Jiang Qionghua stood up irritably, looking down at the people on the floor from her height. “I don’t keep you in the residence to be useless fools. Do you still need to ask me for her medicine at a time like this? The person is right here; why don’t you just write a prescription and have someone fetch and boil the herbs?”

The physicians were terrified.

“It is too late to fetch herbs now. By the time they are boiled, Miss Ming won’t be able to wait.”

“The pills Miss Ming takes are the fastest-acting; kneading and preparing them also takes a long time.”

Jiang Qionghua pressed her brow and dispatched all her secret guards: “All of you, go to the snow in front of the woodshed and search thoroughly. If you don’t find it, you will be held accountable.”

Having said that, she turned back and asked Su Qian’er, “Was the medicine Ming Yishu takes not made by the physicians in the Prime Minister’s residence?”

Su Qian’er said, “The young lady’s medicine was given by the Ji family. The Ji family likely bought it as well. Perhaps the Prime Minister should go to the pharmacies in the capital to ask.”

Jiang Qionghua froze on the spot, suddenly feeling that hope was slim—she herself knew that the medicine Ji Zijun gave must have been made by Ji Zijun personally. And not long ago, she had sent people to assassinate Ji Zijun. Even if he wasn’t dead, he could no longer make medicine for Ming Yishu.

In this vast world, if that last bit of medicine was finished, what would happen next time Ming Yishu’s heart condition flared up? How could it be relieved?

Furthermore, what if that medicine couldn’t be found?

Jiang Qionghua’s mind was in a mess, and her irritation grew.

“A bunch of useless trash.” Jiang Qionghua couldn’t settle her mind to wait for the girl to wake up. She hurriedly grabbed a cloak and walked into the wind and snow. “I will search for it personally. I will surely find it.”

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