The White Moonlight Turns Out to Be a Black-Hearted Lotus - Chapter 21

“Your Highness, do not be afraid…” Pei Xu tried his best to set his mind at ease. “I only encountered that person by chance while seeking shelter from the rain. He did not blame me for colliding with the imperial carriage; perhaps it was all truly just a coincidence.”

“There are no such coincidences; you do not understand him.” Ji Yuanhui’s lips trembled slightly. He opened his mouth several times as if to say something, but swallowed the words back every time. Finally, he simply held Pei Xu tightly and repeated, “You do not understand him. He is a madman…”

“Even if he does not wish to move against you right now, there is no telling when he might suddenly find you displeasing to the eye. His temperament has always been volatile…” Ji Yuanhui remained tense. “You must stay far away from him.”

“Alright, I have committed it to heart.” Pei Xu raised his hand to touch the prince’s face, smoothing out the frown lines knitted between his brows. “Nothing will happen…”

“Mm.” Gripping Pei Xu’s wrist, Ji Yuanhui buried his face into his palm and took a deep breath, his expression showing a touch of professional reliance. “I have lost my composure.”

Pei Xu lowered his eyes, his demeanor serene and gentle. “Your Highness is merely too worried about me.”

How could he not be worried…

This was the person he had fallen for the moment he first understood love—the person he held in his heart and still felt it wasn’t enough.

“Your Highness…”

Pei Xu was calling him. Ji Yuanhui raised his head somewhat sluggishly, realizing belatedly that Pei Xu’s voice sounded anxious.

“Your forehead is so hot. Do you have a fever?” Pei Xu cupped his face, intending to test the temperature with his own forehead. Ji Yuanhui looked at him dazed, finally realizing that his mind was becoming clouded and unclear.

“It seems I am a bit cold.” Ji Yuanhui took a step back to put distance between himself and Pei Xu, worried he might pass it on to him. “Don’t come closer. It doesn’t matter.”

“Your Highness, change your clothes first.” Pei Xu paid no mind to his evasive movements, his heart entirely consumed by worry. “I will go call the manor physician.”

Ji Yuanhui’s constitution had always been good, so he didn’t take it seriously. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll be fine after a nap.”

“You are young now and do not cherish your health, but when you grow older and find that the root of an illness has taken hold, it will be too late to make amends.” Pei Xu’s tone was full of anxiety and disapproval. Before Ji Yuanhui could say anything more, Pei Xu had already pushed the door open and left.

Ji Yuanhui supported his forehead and closed his eyes for a moment, then went to change into dry clothes. A short while later, the manor physician entered the room, carrying a medical chest and following behind Pei Xu.

“It is a fever caused by the intrusion of wind-cold. This old man shall prescribe a formula immediately…”

Perhaps because he had been caught in the rain, the illness came on with a fierce momentum. Ji Yuanhui felt it was becoming difficult to concentrate on what others were saying.

He couldn’t quite remember when he had lain down. He vaguely saw Pei Xu sending someone to see the physician out, then arranging for others to brew the medicine. After everything was settled, Pei Xu sat back down by the bed, leaning against the bedpost to look at him.

“Don’t keep watch here.” Ji Yuanhui’s voice was somewhat hoarse. “Be careful not to catch the sickly air from me.”

Pei Xu refused to leave. With one hand somewhat inconvenienced, he placed a damp cloth on the prince’s forehead. “I have been taking medicine all along; I won’t fall ill so easily.”

Ji Yuanhui felt as though the very air he exhaled was scorching. “Let the servants do these things.”

Pei Xu uttered a soft “No,” a very blunt and direct refusal.

Ji Yuanhui looked at him with an inquiring gaze.

Perhaps because he felt Ji Yuanhui was sick and burning with fever—believing that once the prince recovered, he wouldn’t remember these blurred events—Pei Xu’s expression was not as gentle as usual.

His expression was very cold, and he gazed at Ji Yuanhui with a somewhat stubborn look. His voice was very light, saturated with an abnormal sense of possessiveness: “I don’t like other people touching you.”

Ji Yuanhui’s consciousness drifted between sinking and floating; his eyes were half-closed, and his head throbbed.

In his misty vision, Pei Xu took his hand and pressed it against his cheek. “I don’t like others getting close to you… You don’t know how much I hate Cousin and the others.”

“When Your Highness had just returned to the capital, and we were study partners together, Cousin could put his arm around Your Highness’s shoulder, or grab Your Highness’s wrist and pull your arm…”

He paused for a moment, then suddenly gave a light laugh. “But I could only be constrained by the Pei family rules, wearing a fake smile like a refined puppet… Every time I saw him wantonly pulling Your Highness along to talk and laugh, I felt I was so jealous I would die in the next moment, yet I still had to pretend to be calm and indifferent as if nothing was wrong.”

[Is it because Your Highness treated me too well when we were young? I always felt that Your Highness should belong to me, always be mine, entirely mine, and I don’t want to lose even a sliver of you to anyone else… I know it’s wrong to think this way, but I just can’t help it.]

His tone was so aggrieved that Ji Yuanhui wanted to reach out to stroke his hair and pull him into his arms to pat his back, but he was burning so fiercely that he truly lacked the strength.

“I don’t like smiling like that, but I have to pretend to be obedient so they will be willing to choose me, to choose me to be sent to Your Highness’s side.” Pei Xu’s expression was cold. “Cousin seemed to know something; he warned me more than once to stay away from Your Highness, telling me not to be so lowly, always intentionally seducing Your Highness and clinging to Your Highness without letting go…”

“But I wouldn’t. I insisted on being that ‘vixen’.” Pei Xu hadn’t spoken so much to anyone in a long time. He let out a long breath. “Furthermore, a mutual affection isn’t just one-sided. Your Highness just happens to like me—what can he do about it?”

Although Ji Yuanhui’s head hurt badly, he hadn’t reached the point of passing out, yet Pei Xu seemed to think he was asleep.

Since it was rare for him to say so much, Ji Yuanhui decided it was better not to interrupt him.

“I met him a few times when I was little. Back then, he wasn’t quite so annoying and would occasionally play with me. When he cursed at me in a fit of rage, it was probably because he felt I was one of the Crown Prince’s people, just like the rest of the Pei clan… Even though his heart is for Your Highness, I still dislike him.”

“So, I had Xiao Wu peck out the eye of someone who had bullied me right in front of him.”

Pei Xu blinked, his voice very small as if afraid of waking him. “That fellow is all bark and no bite; he was so scared that he has been afraid of birds ever since. From then on, he didn’t dare to come and berate me again. Later, I often released birds to scare him. It was all his own fault; he bullied me first, and I only gave it back. It wasn’t excessive.”

“Cousin and Your Highness are so close; Your Highness surely knows what he knows.” Pei Xu lowered his voice, the corners of his lips curving. “Your Highness must have known from the very beginning that I might have ulterior motives, yet you were still willing to be good to me.”

“Your Highness surely doesn’t know…”

What was it that he didn’t know?

Even though Ji Yuanhui was so weary he felt he might lose consciousness the next second, he still forced himself to stay alert to hear the end of this sentence.

“On the day Your Highness accompanied me for my seventeenth birthday, it was also the rainy season. The rain was too heavy, and we were trapped together at an inn… Actually, that inn had many empty rooms. I bribed the shopkeeper in advance to have him say there was only one left.”

“Just that…? Why aren’t you mentioning what happened after?” Ji Yuanhui struggled to pry his eyelids open, his voice raspy. “I knew a long time ago. Didn’t you also steal a kiss from me that night?”

Pei Xu didn’t react immediately, asking subconsciously, “How could you know…”

“Because that day, I also took silver to bribe the shopkeeper, but he said someone had already given those instructions, and if I wanted to do the same, I’d have to pay extra.” Ji Yuanhui laughed softly. “Wanting to steal a kiss while I was asleep, yet having such little courage—the moment I moved, you were so startled you even cut the corner of my mouth. You tell me, did I know or not?”

Pei Xu’s expression shifted from blank confusion to the panic of a discovered secret. In a near-instinctive reaction, he raised the back of his hand to cover his lips. Those eyes that usually drooped submissively were now rounded; he retreated two steps in a flurry, his blush spreading rapidly from his cheeks to the tips of his ears.

How could he be so cute…

If he weren’t so dazed with illness right now, Ji Yuanhui would certainly have held him down and kissed him a few more times.

Ji Yuanhui’s mood improved, and he finally couldn’t hold on any longer, sinking into a deep sleep.