The Silly Shou Transmigrated Into a Book - Chapter 31

Just as he was about to take a nap after chatting with Jiang Hansa, his phone chimed again.

Gu Qiuyi picked it up and saw it was “Drunk Lying in the Starry River”—also known as “Orange Soda.”

Gu Qiuyi: “…”

This guy is mentally ill, he thought. One moment he’s blocking me, and the next he’s adding me back.

Orange Soda sent a message: “I can carry you to a higher rank in the game, but you have to delete that ‘W’.”

With a flick of his finger, Gu Qiuyi blocked Orange Soda.

On the other end, Chu Yueguang, seeing no reply, typed a “?”, only to be met with that dreaded red exclamation mark.

Chu Yueguang: “…”

He actually blocked me!

The more Chu Yueguang thought about it, the more he couldn’t swallow this insult. He registered a new account and added Gu Qiuyi again.

Gu Qiuyi saw the request. The nickname was still “Orange Soda.”

Gu Qiuyi: “…”

He was a bit baffled. He didn’t understand why this person was so persistent. Was it someone he knew?

The possibility was high. Not everyone was so wealthy and generous that they’d transfer large sums of money on a whim.

Gu Qiuyi accepted the request and asked: “Why do you keep blocking me? I haven’t done anything wrong. It makes me feel really bad when you do that.”

Orange Soda: “I’m sorry.”

Gu Qiuyi didn’t expect an apology. In his mind, this person was like an egoistic elementary schooler. He paused, then said magnanimously: “It’s okay, I forgive you. After all, I blocked you too.”

Orange Soda asked: “How old are you?”

Gu Qiuyi replied: “I’m 17.”

Orange Soda: “Are you in your senior year of high school?”

Gu Qiuyi: “Yeah, I’m a senior. What about you? How old are you?”

Orange Soda: “Older than you, that’s all that matters.”

For some reason, Gu Qiuyi wanted to laugh. He felt this Orange Soda had a strange, inexplicable competitive streak. “Alright then. So, do you know me?”

Orange Soda: “I don’t. I just added you randomly.”

Gu Qiuyi: “I see. Then why did you block me?”

Orange Soda replied: “Because I felt you were too ‘easy.’ You seem to call everyone ‘Brother’.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Huh? Easy? Isn’t ‘Brother’ just a common, polite address? Shouldn’t you think I’m very well-mannered?”

Orange Soda: “?” “Don’t you realize that calling someone ‘Brother’ sounds like you’re acting spoiled? Acting spoiled with men.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Ah, that’s just what you think, right?”

Orange Soda: “.”

Gu Qiuyi said: “If I call you ‘Brother Orange,’ do you think I’m acting spoiled with you too?”

Orange Soda: “.”

Gu Qiuyi: “…You’re sending punctuation marks again. That’s really infuriating.”

Orange Soda: “You can get angry too?”

Gu Qiuyi said: “Of course I get angry, I’m human! The way you act makes me feel like you look down on me. Did I offend you somehow?”

Orange Soda: “…No.”

Gu Qiuyi asked: “Does it bother you that I call people ‘Brother’?”

Orange Soda said honestly: “It does. I can’t stand it.”

Gu Qiuyi said: “But that’s my business. If you can’t stand it, why force yourself to look?”

For the first time, he was getting genuinely angry during a chat. He transferred back the 16,666 yuan he had received from Orange Soda earlier. “I don’t want your money anymore. I don’t want to talk to you.”

Orange Soda: “…”

Orange Soda said: “I’m sorry, I was wrong. Don’t delete me. I won’t say things like that anymore.”

Endure the humiliation for now, Chu Yueguang thought. No one would ever know he was using a burner account to talk to him anyway.

Gu Qiuyi asked: “Do you really know you were wrong?”

Orange Soda: “…” “Mm-hmm, I was wrong.”

“That’s a bit perfunctory, but whatever,” Gu Qiuyi said. “Don’t say things like that again. Me calling you ‘Brother’ isn’t acting spoiled. I didn’t even know I was doing it, but somehow you knew? You know, you’re acting like one of those…”

He thought for a moment and typed: “You’re acting like a ‘Puxin’ man—Ordinary yet Confident. Someone glances at you and you think they’re in love with you. You’re dreaming; they wouldn’t even give you the time of day.”

Orange Soda: “?”

This kid has a sharp tongue?

Chu Yueguang was slightly enlightened. He felt more than ever that Gu Qiuyi must have been putting on an act in front of him before.

Gu Qiuyi scolded him further: “Why the question mark? Am I wrong?”

Orange Soda endured: “You aren’t wrong.”

After a while, Orange Soda couldn’t help but retort: “I am confident, but I am not ordinary.”

Gu Qiuyi: “That’s just your opinion. In the eyes of others, you’re just ordinary.”

Orange Soda was silent for a moment, then sent a screenshot of his Alipay balance. The number was so long it practically ran off the screen.

Gu Qiuyi: “…”

He clicked the image and counted the digits. There were actually 30 million yuan.

Gu Qiuyi: “How did you Photoshop this? It looks so natural.”

Orange Soda: “…” “It’s not Photoshopped!”

With that, he sent another screenshot of last month’s bank statement. It showed an incoming transfer of 10 million, with a final balance of 580 million yuan.

Gu Qiuyi: “Wow, your editing skills are top-notch.”

Orange Soda: “?” “I told you, it’s not edited.”

Gu Qiuyi began to have doubts. “Do you have proof that it isn’t fake?”

Orange Soda: “Believe it or not. This is just my most insignificant, trivial trait.”

Gu Qiuyi: “?” “How tall are you?”

Orange Soda reported a lower number than his actual height: “188 cm.”

Gu Qiuyi asked: “Do you have abs?”

This question felt very suggestive. Orange Soda grew annoyed. Why did he have high hopes for this person? He asks for measurements right away—so practiced, clearly not his first time. “I have an 8-pack.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Wow.” “Can I ask about your… size down there?”

Orange Soda: “…”

Too much. This is way too much. They’d only known each other for a few days, and he was asking such private questions? Chu Yueguang was deeply disappointed. “I can’t answer that.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Let me guess then. Definitely 18 cm or more, right?”

Orange Soda: “…”

He couldn’t help but sneer: “You’re asking so much, are you trying to sext?”

Gu Qiuyi: “?” “You’re overthinking it. I’m not that kind of person. I just want to use these data points to figure out who you are.”

Orange Soda: “…So, do you know who I am now?”

Gu Qiuyi: “I have a pretty good guess.”

Orange Soda: “…” “I don’t believe you can know who I am through data like that. At least make up a better lie.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Is your surname Jiang?”

Orange Soda: “?”

Seeing this reaction, Gu Qiuyi felt he was likely right. In the original novel, Xu Muqing had countless admirers, including a pair of uncle and nephew: Jiang Wenzhou and Jiang Yishu. Perhaps the author was lazy, because both were 188 cm tall.

Given the situation, this Orange Soda was likely Jiang Yishu. Although the ab count didn’t match, men over 185 cm usually don’t lie about being shorter, so the height data was likely accurate.

However, Jiang Yishu was a spoiled, “second-generation” brat. Gu Qiuyi hated him when reading the book, so he remembered the plot involving those two quite clearly.

Gu Qiuyi said: “You’re silent, so I must be right.”

Chu Yueguang: “…” Right, my foot.

Chu Yueguang didn’t clarify; instead, he had an idea. “Even if you know my name is Jiang, so what? You don’t know my full name.”

Gu Qiuyi: “I do. You’re Jiang Yishu, right?”

Chu Yueguang found the name familiar. He recalled it was that brat from the Jiang family who had been sent abroad a few years ago to avoid a scandal.

Chu Yueguang frowned slightly. “How do you know?”

Gu Qiuyi said mysteriously: “Because I can divine the future.”

Orange Soda: “.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Fine, I’ll be blunt. You’re this rich and this ‘excellent.’ Looking at that social circle, it’s easy to guess who you are.”

Orange Soda: “…Since you know, I won’t hide it anymore. I’m laying my cards on the table.”

He paused. “I want to ‘keep’ you as a lover. Name your price.”

Gu Qiuyi: “???”

Chu Yueguang tilted his chin up, a cold sneer on his face. He could see it now—this person loved money. He’d call anyone “Brother” for cash. That night he climbed into bed was also a play to reach the top in one leap.

Someone like that wouldn’t refuse this offer.

Despite thinking this, Chu Yueguang didn’t realize that a tiny sliver of hope still lingered in his heart. The month they spent together wasn’t fake. Subconsciously, he made excuses for Gu Qiuyi—thinking maybe he was drunk that night, or drugged. But he knew clearly that Gu Qiuyi didn’t smell like alcohol at all.

Moreover, after throwing him out, he had seen him in the living room, and he seemed perfectly fine, ruling out the drugging theory.

While he was lost in thought, Gu Qiuyi replied: “You think just because you have some stinking money, you can keep me?”

Orange Soda: “?” “You want me to set the price?” “Fine. Two million a month. Are you with me or not?”

Gu Qiuyi: “Get lost.”

Orange Soda: “?” “Did you read that correctly? Two million a month. You don’t want it?”

Gu Qiuyi: “I do like money, but I won’t take this kind of money! I’m not that kind of person!”

Orange Soda transferred him 500,000. “Still don’t want it?”

Gu Qiuyi was angry again. Kou Huai had mentioned being a benefactor before, but he hadn’t been this angry then. That was because Kou Huai simply thought money would move him more than a serious relationship—his attitude wasn’t the problem; he treated it like dating.

But this Orange Soda? When he said “keep,” he meant it in the most derogatory sense. His previous disdainful attitude was still there, and now he spoke from a position of superiority and contempt.

Gu Qiuyi was furious. He loved money, but he wasn’t without a bottom line. Even if offered hundreds of millions, he wouldn’t compromise and be someone’s kept plaything.

Gu Qiuyi replied: “I DON’T WANT IT!!!”

Orange Soda silently transferred another 500,000. “Now?”

Gu Qiuyi: “Screw you and your ancestors! Is being rich that great?! Blocked! Goodbye!”

With that, he blocked Orange Soda again.

Chu Yueguang stared at the red exclamation mark that appeared once more. He fell silent, frowning in thought for a few seconds.

The price must not have been high enough.