Still Secretly In Love With My Enemy Today - Chapter 36

Chapter 36:

 

Leaving Hengzhou, bypassing Jizhou, and heading down to Qingzhou, Xie Huaishuang and I traveled for five days without seeing a single trace of the Temple.

 

“This is the southeastern border of Qingzhou.”

 

The Iron Vermilion Bird needed to descend for a rest. I pointed out a small town to Xie Huaishuang; from this height, the scattered lights merged into a shimmering, blurred river in the evening dusk.

 

I suddenly remembered there was indeed a river there, not very wide. The last time I passed through, a fleeting glance revealed many flickering lanterns floating on the water.

 

Hearing this, Xie Huaishuang didn’t put down his brush but glanced quickly out the window. On the paper before him were several ink strokes of varying thickness—sharp and swift. He was deducing his sword forms again.

 

He had explained them to me in detail a few times, but I couldn’t quite grasp them yet. I could only tell that the stroke on the left carried the most killing intent. It would take a lot of effort for me to parry it; now was probably not the best time to try and sneak a kiss.

 

Xie Huaishuang kept his head down, adding another light yet fierce stroke. “Are we stopping here?”

 

“Yes.”

 

The thirteen provinces of West Wing are dotted with Iron Cloud City outposts. I am responsible for the eastern provinces of Heng, Qing, and Ji. Beyond Qingzhou lies the territory managed by Senior Brother He; I’m not as familiar with it, so resupplying in Qingzhou is the wiser choice.

 

With nothing else to do after setting the flight path, I sat beside him and watched.

 

He has been getting colder toward me these past few days.

 

On the first day, he’d stand up to kiss me, sit down to kiss me; if I was at the bow, he was at the bow; if I was at the stern, he was at the stern. At night, he insisted on sleeping with our fingers interlaced.

 

The second day was still acceptable. But by the third day, things changed. He started obsessing over his sword. The number of times he initiated a kiss didn’t even exceed thirty for the whole day.

 

The fourth day was even worse. When we went to sleep, he only told me he liked me best three times.

 

It’s only been five days. Is he already bored of me?

 

The more I thought about it, the more anxious I became. It couldn’t be that in just a few days, Xie Huaishuang found me tiresome and didn’t want me anymore, right?

 

People can’t be like that. He can’t be like that!

 

Xie Huaishuang put down his sword diagrams. When he looked up, his expression softened. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but seeing me, the words died on his lips.

 

…Does he really find me annoying? So much so that he doesn’t even want to speak to me?

 

The thought was terrifying. Xie Huaishuang could do no wrong, so the fault must be mine. I must have done something I shouldn’t have these past few days.

 

I quickly replayed events in my mind. On the morning of the second day, I saw Xie Huaishuang lift his hem, stand up, and sit beside me, naturally wrapping his arms around my neck.

 

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

 

“…It’s nothing.”

 

I haven’t found the root of the problem yet. I must be cautious with my words and speak as little as possible to avoid repeating the mistake.

 

Xie Huaishuang furrowed his brows, a suspicious look on his face.

 

“You’re definitely hiding something. Why are you unhappy for no reason?”

 

I tried to quibble: “I’m not unhappy… mmm.”

 

When we pulled apart, Xie Huaishuang gave my lower lip a firm nip, his lashes brushing against the corner of my eye. “Still unhappy?”

 

I truly couldn’t figure out what I’d done wrong, so I simply pulled him closer. “Am I annoying you?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

Xie Huaishuang blinked, looking as though he didn’t understand.

 

“Tell me, and I’ll change,” I stared at him tensely. “You aren’t going to leave me, are you?”

 

Xie Huaishuang went silent, his eyes blinking faster. Suddenly, he burst into laughter, his shoulders shaking.

 

Confused, I could only hold his waist to keep him from toppling over.

 

—So beautiful. Like ripples in a jade pool, like exquisite features painted in fresh ink on white porcelain, like a swaying magnolia.

 

How can he be so good-looking at all times? Even when I’m this nervous, worrying he’ll dump me, I start daydreaming just looking at him.

 

“Why… why would you think that?”

 

Why would I think that? Should I not? Nominally, we have confessed our feelings; do I not even have the right to worry about my “status”?

 

“You did nothing wrong. Not a single thing.”

 

Xie Huaishuang’s eyes curved into crescent moons, like last night’s moon. His hands cupped my cheeks, his voice soft. “I won’t leave you—I like you best. I’ll never part from you, no matter what. Why are you thinking such things?”

 

Really?

 

“Then why have you been so cold to me these past two days?”

 

The moment I said it, I felt it was the wrong thing to say, so I quickly added, “Not very cold—just a little. Only a little.”

 

Xie Huaishuang froze. His lashes trembled, and his fingertips curled, brushing against the back of my neck.

 

“Was I… cold to you?”

 

“I haven’t interacted with many people before, and I’ve never liked anyone else,” he paused, whispering. “Tell me if you’re unhappy. I’ll learn slowly, okay?”

 

“I’m not blaming you; you’re doing wonderfully,” I couldn’t stand seeing him like this and hurried to explain. “I wasn’t unhappy, actually…”

 

“I neglected you these past few days. What do you want?” Xie Huaishuang looked dead serious. “Say it. Whatever you want, tell me.”

 

I hesitated. “Then can you hold me every night when we sleep?”

 

Xie Huaishuang immediately nodded. “Okay. What else?”

 

I thought for a moment. “Can you tell me you like me best ten times every night before bed?”

 

His brow furrowed slightly for a split second before smoothing out. After a moment of silence, he nodded.

 

“Can you kiss me a hundred times a day?”

 

This time, Xie Huaishuang didn’t speak. He stared at me with searching green eyes. His hair fell right by my hand; I couldn’t help but start twining it around my fingers again.

 

“Have you considered,” he said after a long deliberation, “that actually… maybe you are the one with the problem?”

 

I was struck with horror, and the hair in my hand slipped away. He does think I have a problem!

 

“But—”

 

“Enough!” Xie Huaishuang pulled my neck down. “I like you best, I only like you, and I’ll never leave you. You aren’t allowed to think about this anymore—are you going to kiss me or not?”

 

I swallowed my words and nodded.

 

…

 

Five days were enough for the news to reach every corner of West Wing.

 

Resupplying the Iron Vermilion Bird took an hour. After giving instructions, I wandered the town with Xie Huaishuang.

 

Sitting in a tea house, I heard a storyteller vividly recounting the tale of the Iron Cloud City fugitive and the Temple High Priest. While buying a magnolia hairpin, the stall owner, seeing we were outsiders, eagerly gossiped about the same thing. Even passing through the crowd, people were whispering about it.

 

“When I was carrying you that day, did it really hurt?”

 

Xie Huaishuang was biting into the second hawthorn of his candied plum stick. Sitting in the shadows of the lanterns, he shook his head. “Not at all—I don’t know why they’re saying that.”

 

In the various rumors, I sounded monstrously cruel. People wondered how the poor High Priest was being humiliated and enslaved in my hands. Does the God of West Wing not care? Can he not even protect his own Priest?

 

“Are you still eating?”

 

Xie Huaishuang waved another candied plum stick. “It won’t be good if you wait too long.”

 

My mind had been so caught up in the gossip that I realized I’d let him hold it for a long time.

 

“Yes.”

 

I nodded and reached for it, but he didn’t hand it over. Instead, he brought it directly to my lips. Nearby, someone said, “To think even the High Priest could be toyed with by those people,” and Xie Huaishuang started to laugh, his hand shaking slightly.

 

“You won’t be laughing if you’re recognized.”

 

Xie Huaishuang shrugged indifferently. “Isn’t your disguise technique very impressive?”

 

Fine.

 

Xie Huaishuang was curious about everything. Following him, I felt a sincere sense of relief that I hadn’t spent much money over the last twenty years. Otherwise, how could I afford everything for him now?

 

Whatever he wants, he should have. After all…

 

“Wait.” I stopped him. “This… are you sure?”

 

Xie Huaishuang shook a small wine jug in his hand. “I can’t?”

 

“Have you ever had wine before?”

 

He shook his head. “Never. So what?”

 

One sniff told me this wine was potent. Ordinary people would get drunk on just a bit. I was instinctively skeptical of his tolerance; he looked very much like someone who would pass out after one cup.

 

“They only sell this here,” Xie Huaishuang said, blinking at me. “People travel from all over to buy it. They don’t sell it anywhere else.”

 

“Just a taste.” He tugged at my sleeve. I gave in.

 

“Taste it when we get back.”

 

Xie Huaishuang nodded repeatedly, happily carrying his jug as he plunged back into the crowd. After two steps, he paused and came back to take my hand.

 

“I won’t neglect you.”

 

His thumb brushed the back of my hand, his eyes bright under the lanterns.

 

I was easily charmed by him again. So much so that by the time I realized what was happening, his small cup was empty.

 

“Didn’t we agree on just a taste?”

 

We had only been back for fifteen minutes. A deep flush had already spread across his cheeks, his eyes were watery and unfocused, and his hand was reaching for the jug again. “It actually tastes quite good. Where is this ‘potency’ you mentioned? It’s nothing much…”

 

I watched him reach out and miss the cup three times. Amidst his dissatisfied gaze, I confiscated the jug and the cup.

 

“Why are you taking them?”

 

There is no point arguing with a drunk person. I “confiscated” him too, took off his shoes, and placed him on the bed.

 

“Stay still. I’ll go get you some—”

 

Before I could finish, he yanked me down. If I hadn’t braced my hand beside him, I would have crashed onto him.

 

He wrapped his arms around my neck again, sinking into the pillow. At a distance of inches, he looked at me through a haze, the corners of his eyes a faint red, shimmering with moisture.

 

His breath smelled of spicy wine mixed with a hint of peach blossoms, merging hotly with the cool fragrance of his body. My heart raced just looking at him.

 

“What is it?”

 

The light wasn’t bright to begin with, and behind the bed curtains, we were completely shrouded in shadow. Xie Huaishuang pulled me down further, squinting, and tilted his forehead to nuzzle mine.

 

“I won’t leave you. I like you best…”

 

The rest of his words became muddled. When I captured his lips, he tilted his head up to meet me, soft sounds occasionally escaping his throat.

 

I hadn’t touched the wine earlier, fearing he’d drink more if he saw me join in. But tasting it now from him, the flavor was indeed quite good.

 

Suddenly, Xie Huaishuang’s hand moved to my collar, pulling it outward.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

Xie Huaishuang said it as if it were the most natural thing in the world: “Going to bed… with you.”

 

“…”

 

Xie Huaishuang always managed to say things that left me stunned.

 

“What’s wrong with that?” He frowned. “I can’t?”

 

“Do you even know what to do?”

 

He was clearly quite drunk, but he insisted: “I know.”

 

“What do you know?”

 

“It has to be on a bed.”

 

“And then?”

 

“Take off clothes.”

 

“And after that?”

 

Xie Huaishuang thought for a long time and didn’t speak. His gaze drifted, and when he spoke again, he sounded quite reluctant. “I don’t know anymore.”

 

“…”

 

And yet he had the nerve to say he knew.

 

“I know,” I kissed the corner of his mouth. “Beg me, and I’ll teach you.”

 

Xie Huaishuang gave me a sidelong glance. “Why should I beg you?”

 

I didn’t speak, just stared at him. As expected, he couldn’t hold out for long. He leaned into my ear, his voice very low and so fast I could barely hear him.

 

After he finished, he glared at me. “I begged. Why aren’t you saying anything?”

 

“I said I’d teach you,” I rolled off him, lying beside him under the tangled blankets. “I didn’t say I’d teach you today.”

 

Nothing was prepared. He was drunk, and I, for now, was sober.

 

Xie Huaishuang stared at me in disbelief for a long time, his hands rummaging around the bed. I asked, “What are you looking for?”

 

“Looking for… my sword.” He leaned in and bit my lip. “Just you wait.”