It's Too Late for Regrets - Chapter 11.8

Rayan slowly rubbed the tip of his glove where her lipstick had stained it, as if he wanted to feel that trace in place of her lips.

 

“It hasn’t even been a week since you came to me, but my desire keeps growing. I’m afraid one day I might lose control and do something terrible… Of course, I never will.”

 

His last words sounded as if he was trying to brainwash himself.

 

What did he mean by “desire keeps growing”?

 

While Ines quietly fell into thought, the carriage slowly came to a stop. They had arrived at their destination—La Celia Cathedral.

 

Rayan got off the carriage first.

 

He suddenly reached out his arm, so she assumed he was going to escort her. But his way of touching her always defied expectations.

 

Ines was gently lifted down from the carriage in his strong arms.

 

Naturally, their bodies were very close, and she couldn’t avoid the kiss he pressed to her lips before pulling away.

 

Before she could say anything to avoid what had just happened, Rayan spoke first.

 

“I’ll wait. How long will it take?”

 

“You’ll wait for me?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I thought you’d say you’d come with me.”

 

Just moments ago, he had spoken so possessively, yet now he wasn’t even planning to go in with her.

 

It was unexpected.

 

Still standing close enough that their foreheads could almost touch, Rayan muttered indifferently.

 

“Well, churches… priests… I’m not really a fan of those things.”

 

“…”

 

“Go ahead, Ines.”

 

With that farewell, he took a step back from her.

 

As Ines slowly climbed the steps, she turned to look at the man who stood still, only watching her without moving.

 

He’s really not following? Even though he can’t stand being apart from me for even a second?

 

She turned around several times, but Rayan stayed in place with his hands in his pockets, watching her until she finally passed through the cathedral’s large arched doors.

 

A thought suddenly crossed Ines’s mind.

 

Could it be that he can’t enter the church at all?

 

 

La Celia Cathedral was an impressive building with four spires that seemed to pierce the sky.

 

Built around the same time as the Imperial Palace in Lezan, the centuries-old structure carried a sense of grandeur and antiquity throughout.

 

It seemed they had been waiting for her after receiving Eleanor’s letter in advance. A junior priest guided her up the left staircase leading to the clergy’s rooms.

 

As she climbed the stairs, Ines added more detail to the thought she’d just had.

 

Rayan is the master of Kian now. And Kian likely has a nature that would be classified as evil… Is that why he dislikes the sacred church?

 

After ascending the tall spiral staircase, Ines entered the Archbishop’s room at the very top floor. But the person waiting inside wasn’t just the Archbishop.

 

As soon as the door opened, Ines met the eyes of the person inside. Blue eyes widened in surprise, and his lips parted.

 

“Y-Your Majesty?”

 

A dazzling golden light shimmered from the modest sofa in the room.

 

Edgar, lounging diagonally on the sofa with a teacup in hand, lifted his head.

 

“Oh, you arrived earlier than I thought.”

 

His gently curved smile was dazzling.

 

Edgar gestured toward her.

 

Ines approached in a daze and sat across from him.

 

“How did you…? Were you meeting with the Archbishop?”

 

“No, nothing like that.”

 

Edgar lightly kissed the back of her hand and gave a playful wink.

 

“I thought I’d try something my brother is good at, just this once.”

 

“Something he’s good at? What do you mean…?”

 

Could he mean spying on her? Her guess turned out to be correct.

 

“Yesterday, I heard a letter had been sent to La Celia Cathedral in Eleanor’s name. My brother was never a religious man, so who else would be visiting but you?”

 

The letter addressed to Archbishop Andrea had been passed directly to the Lezan Palace.

 

In the Grand Duke’s own handwriting, it said:

 

“Whatever my wife wishes to know, tell her. Whatever she wishes to see, show her. Whatever she desires, give it to her. But only one thing—do not bestow the priest’s blessing.”

 

Ines immediately picked up on what Edgar had deliberately left unsaid.

 

“Did the Grand Duke’s letter to the Archbishop say not to give me a blessing?”

 

A faint glimmer appeared in Edgar’s eyes as he looked at her.

 

“So you had a feeling?”

 

“Well… I wasn’t sure, but I thought it wouldn’t be surprising if he had already taken steps like that.”

 

After all, he wouldn’t have let her come this far unless he’d made some arrangements.

 

Ines gave a polite smile. Truthfully, she had never fully believed Rayan’s words from the start.

 

“We just missed each other, that’s all.”

 

Could it really be that simple?

 

Then why did that man keep acting so submissive around her?

 

The desperation he showed sometimes seemed more fitting for a criminal than a nobleman.

 

He was probably terrified because something had happened in the past that she must never remember. She had a hunch, and Edgar’s presence now confirmed it.

 

But what kept confusing her was this: If Rayan didn’t want her to regain her memory, he could’ve just stopped her from coming to the cathedral entirely. That would’ve been simpler.

 

So why allow her to come here, even writing a letter saying she could have whatever she wanted—except a blessing?

 

“It feels like someone might take you away from me at any moment, and that scares me.”

 

“I’m afraid I might do something terrible without realizing it one day. Of course, I never will.”

 

It was like he wanted to keep her by his side, yet also hated himself for feeling that way. His mind and actions didn’t align.

 

Rayan Eleanor’s recent behavior was full of contradictions.

 

He appeared calm and stable on the outside, but inside, he was still just as shaken as he had been during their days in the Forest of Rosram.

 

Breaking through her thoughts, Edgar spoke.

 

“How’s life? Is it better than in Irope?”

 

“Ah… Well, at the Count’s mansion, nothing belonged to me. But at the Grand Duke’s residence, Caesar is there, so it’s much better. And being there brings back a lot of memories, too.”

 

Ines replied calmly, then hesitantly asked,

 

“Has Celia woken up?”

 

“No, not yet. But I heard she’s passed a few critical moments. Several priests are assigned to her, pouring out blessings.”

 

“That’s a relief… And the engagement ceremony?”

 

“Well… Since the future Empress of Lezan is still on the brink of death… I suppose I’ll have to find another suitable partner.”

 

“…Your Majesty. I don’t know how to apologize. Because of me, you keep—”

 

“Again with that.”

 

Edgar slightly frowned.

 

“This isn’t your fault, Ines. Don’t feel bad. There are many things you can give me besides apologies.”

 

“…Yes. Thank you.”

 

Truthfully, thanks probably wasn’t what he wanted to hear, either. Ines lowered her eyes awkwardly.

 

I should go visit Celia sometime too.

 

If Celia was at fault, it was only for being swept into the miserable fate she and Rayan shared.

 

Just as that thought crossed her mind, the bells below rang, signaling the end of mass.

 

Edgar straightened up from the sofa.

 

“The Archbishop will be here soon. I’ve told him that he doesn’t need to follow the Grand Duke’s orders. Ask anything you want—priests may hide the truth, but they never lie.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“If you want to visit the scripture archive, feel free to say so. La Celia Cathedral holds the largest collection of sacred texts outside of the Vatican. You’ll likely find what you’re looking for.”

 

Ines responded with a smile instead of words.

 

She hoped so too, sincerely.

 

A few minutes later, Archbishop Andrea finally appeared.

 

He was a tall, broad-shouldered old man with long oval glasses. After a brief prayer for Ines and the Emperor, he immediately asked:

 

“Why is a soul that should have already returned to the Father still lingering here?”

 

“You recognize me right away.”

 

“Traces of the chill of evil still linger around you. If I couldn’t recognize that, I wouldn’t be fit to wear these robes.”

 

There was a subtle hostility in his voice. Ines understood what he was wary of.

 

“The oldest darkness.”

 

“…”

 

“So you can read the traces it left behind, Archbishop.”

 

“…Your Majesty, what is this woman’s true identity?”

 

Ines slowly lowered the hat that covered half her face.

 

Her short black hair and blue eyes were fully revealed to the old priest.

 

“I’m the Grand Duchess of Eleanor, who was said to be dead. An illegitimate child born of the royal family of Jenaire, and of the bloodline known as ‘sorcerers’ in the central continent.”

 

As she calmly continued, the Archbishop’s expression grew more serious.

 

“And I am also a human who, for a long time, was the host of the oldest darkness—called ‘misfortune’ in Jenaire.”

 

“The host of darkness…”

 

With a peaceful smile, Ines concluded.

 

“I’ve come to seek knowledge from you about my origin and powers. Could you spare me a moment of your time?”