If I Throw Myself into His Sea - Episode 1.20

What happened was unbelievable.

The voice belonged to Ian.

Her pupils dilated. Irene was startled, her eyes widening as she turned her head, following Ian’s voice.

Pereian. He, who had been silent all along, had come to the Coral Palace’s greenhouse. Stepping into the greenhouse, Pereian dismissed Atina with a mere gesture.

“Pereian, what brings you here?”

Seeing her, unable to even hide her flushed cheeks, Pereian swallowed a hollow laugh.

Every part of the underwater palace was held in Pereian’s grasp. Wherever one went, his eyes reached; whatever one said, his ears heard.

Not every ruler of the underwater kingdom managed their palace in this way, but for him, sitting on a shaky throne, it was essential. Thus, it was only a moment ago that he received a report that Sipri had headed to the Coral Palace with a gift imbued with magic.

He had heard of Sipri’s visits to the Coral Palace before and ignored them, but he came to see what his influential friend, a promising talent, had given to the Queen.

She was holding a pen, writing a letter with a happier expression than he had ever seen. Unsettled by her serene smile, he opened his mouth, and Irene, as if surprised, met his gaze with a frozen face.

“Did you perhaps come to see me?”

Following that, with a face ten times brighter than when she was writing the letter, she asked if he had come to see her.

All of this was unfamiliar to Pereian. He wanted to ask immediately.

Why aren’t you affectionate with me? You can’t possibly be happy in this sea. I’m the one who made it that way. However, his lips, having lived through countless years soaked in blood, were twice as sharp as the questions he held, and the more he spoke, the more sarcastic he became.

“I heard Sipri threw you some pathetic amusement.”

Pereian imprinted the glass bottle and the letter bearing Irene’s handwriting in his mind a couple of times.

The words in the letter, which he hadn’t even managed to cover, were etched into his brain.

“To my beloved Rupel…”

“Pereian, that’s!”

“So, this recipient must be your first love that you left on land.”

Watching Irene’s pupils shake violently, Pereian felt a kind of certainty.

This Rupel fellow must be this woman’s first love. The man she left on land.

In fact, whether the Queen had a first love or not, or whether she missed that man, was entirely irrelevant to Pereian. In any case, she was now the Queen of the underwater kingdom of Deltia, and Pereian’s wife. Even if it was an unwanted marriage, it was irreversible once she came to this sea. But the fact that such a vague emotion was swirling in Pereian’s head was definitely spite.

‘Live quietly, that’s what I told you.’

An unwanted marriage. But Pereian needed legitimacy for his succession, and Epin wanted the funds of the Deltia royal family.

Pereian at the time had no choice but to accept Epin’s proposal. If he were to lose the throne of Deltia, his end would be death.

For him, who didn’t have much political experience yet, there was no easier or more important option than a relationship forged by marriage.

Furthermore, this marriage would stop the marriage talks with internal forces in Deltia. And so, he brought in the princess, but dissatisfaction began to sprout in one corner of his heart.

‘Then, what about Ruine?’

Because he had married against his will, Epin’s princess was already destined to take the Queen’s seat.

‘I promised that I would definitely find her and propose.’

The communication device, their link to Ruine, had been discovered by his father and broken in half. He couldn’t even search for Ruine, but even if he could, he didn’t know what he would do.

Should he tell her the truth? Tell her that he was powerless and had to marry the princess of Epin, so he couldn’t give her the queen’s seat?

No, he couldn’t do that.

Ruine, not as queen, didn’t exist in his mind. There couldn’t be two queens, so the king’s partner who wasn’t queen could only be a concubine. However, Pereian, determined not to be like his father, couldn’t bring Ruine in as a concubine, nor did he want to.

Being born the child of a concubine himself, he knew better than anyone the treatment concubines received in the undersea kingdom. No matter how much he, as the ruler, cherished her, it would only bring Ruine pain. Then, like his mother, Ruine might leave Pereian and go to land.

Burying a love he couldn’t even touch, he humbly proceeded with the marriage to the princess.

Even if the queen’s seat belonged to Princess Epin, he left his love forever to Ruine. Pereian approached Irene with a displeased expression.

“I heard adultery is a serious crime in Epin.”

The corners of his lips, raised in mockery, trembled slightly. He slowly scanned Irene, who was holding a pen.

“Are you worried about the lover you left on land?”

Straight posture. Unlike Ruine, who groaned every night, she looked like she had grown up without worries her whole life, and she was avoiding his gaze as if afraid.

“No matter how impatient you are.”

“……”

“……You shouldn’t be like this already.”

Pereian Richard disliked everything about Irene Iphraim.

‘Irene Iphraim.’ The aloof princess of Epin.

Because of the scandals of your people, I married you. So, I hope you taste the despair I felt in my sea and be unhappy. I hope you feel even a little bit of my life, having to promise a lifetime with someone else while having a loved one.

With that in mind, he kept his distance, and he was secretly pleased to hear that she had a first love she left behind on land. The thought that he wasn’t the only one who had lost something.

At the same time, the thought that he could take away her precious first love.

Listening to the queen’s quiet daily life without her husband’s love, Pereian felt a childish sense of victory. So, Irene Iphraim sending a letter to her first love was something that should not happen.

Unlike himself, who couldn’t reach Ruine, who didn’t even know which region he lived in, the woman could send such letters to her first love forever. And that was something that would shatter his joy. Pereian smiled bitterly.

“If you do this…”

Irene hurriedly tried to hide the letter, but she couldn’t beat Pereian’s speed.

Pereian snatched the letter away so that Irene’s hands couldn’t even touch it, and read her words aloud.

“To my beloved Rupel. Rupel, how are you? I am now in the Coral Palace of the Underwater Kingdom.”

“Pere…”

“There are so many things I want to say, but first I want to tell you that I miss you.”

“Stop! Stop reading…”

Irene grabbed Pereian’s wrist with both hands and pleaded, sobbing. Pereian shook off her touch and stared at Irene, who was sprawled on the floor, with a face devoid of any emotion.

“Yes, I should stop reading now.”

“……”

“So, please lift your head.”

At the comforting words, Irene slowly raised her head, and Pereian, as if waiting for that moment, grabbed the letter he had stopped reading.

“You should see this sight yourself.”

Then, he tore the letter apart with both hands. The woman watching the scene gradually turned pale, but the action did not stop.

“How dare you in my sea.”

Anger was laced in every word.

“Of all places, in my underwater palace.”

At the end of that anger, a series of thought processes that you shouldn’t be happy alone was rearing its head.

“So blatantly, attempting to communicate with the land.”

In a chilling voice, he added, “You have no fear, my queen.”

Irene, breathing heavily, picked up the fragments of paper that had fallen to the floor, scolded by Pereian. The torn letter could not be sent to Rupel.

Even if she pieced it together, she couldn’t do anything else because he would surely worry if he received a tattered letter. But it couldn’t be left on the floor like this. This was Sipri’s favor before it was a letter to Rupel.

Irene, who was sweeping up the paper, looked pitifully at Pereian, who suddenly came forward.

He said, “Pereian, it’s not like that. Listen to me.”

“If it’s not like that…”

“He’s just a friend. Sipri knows it too.”

A princess of a nation using the modifier ‘beloved’ for a man who is just a close friend. Pereian dismissed the words as an excuse and looked down at Irene with a pathetic gaze.

“You call that a reason?”

“I told you, I don’t want to lie to you anymore.”

In an instant, Irene’s words were cut short by Pereian’s footwork. The kindness of Sipri, which Irene was desperately trying to salvage, was at Pereian’s feet. Pereian, who skillfully avoided the queen’s fingers and trampled the pieces of the letter with his shoe, filled in the words Irene couldn’t finish.

“Even if you don’t lie to me.”

He turned his toe slightly and looked at the greenhouse exit, saying, “The day I trust you will never come.”

“……”

“A relationship where we only believe each other’s obituary would be suitable for us.”

Pereian, who scanned her frustrated face, sneered. “That kind of face suits you better than flushed cheeks.”

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