I Refuse This Life, Your Highness! - Chapter 49

My head moved on its own. Before I realized it, the Grand Duke’s lips weren’t on the flower anymore they were on mine. His lips, warmer than my own despite having been outside, pressed against mine, parting them gently. His tongue slid in, brushing against my gums before delving deeper.

As before, the Grand Duke’s kisses were unyielding and intense. He knelt before me while I sat in the chair, an awkward position that forced me to hunch forward slightly. Sensing my discomfort, he wrapped his hand around my waist, lifting me effortlessly as he took a step back, then another. Even as we moved, his lips never left mine.

“Breathe, Yuraine.”

His lips barely moved away as he tapped my nose lightly. I understood he meant for me to breathe through my nose, but it wasn’t so easy in practice. Sensing my struggle, he pulled back momentarily, allowing me to gasp for air like someone surfacing from deep water. Then, just as I caught my breath, he resumed the kiss.

Our shared breaths grew warmer, the air around us growing humid. I didn’t realize how far back we had moved until my legs hit the edge of the bed. Without breaking the kiss, the Grand Duke pushed me gently onto the soft mattress.

The bed cushioned my fall, and before I could react, he was above me. Still wearing his boots, he climbed onto the bed, his large frame looming over me like a predator. His size and presence were overwhelming, blocking out everything else in the room. The dim light of the bedside lamp cast shadows over his face, highlighting his striking features.

Even in this lighting, his face was stunning—worthy of the title peerless beauty. I reached out instinctively, my fingers tracing the elegant curve of his deep-set eyes. He blinked reflexively but remained still, his gaze following my touch. My hand brushed over his high cheekbones, his smooth skin, the bridge of his proud nose, and his well-defined lips.

No sculptor could craft something so perfect. Before I realized it, my fingertips were lingering on his lips.

“Do you like what you see?”

His deep voice reverberated in my chest, sending shivers down my spine. He took my hand in his, pressing it against his cheek. The warmth of his skin was a stark contrast to his cold, aloof demeanor. His skin was soft, yet his presence was strong.

“…!”

He kissed the palm of my hand. The sensation was firm yet gentle, the press of his lips sending a tingling warmth through my entire body. The room suddenly felt hot, as though his touch could melt me completely. My lower abdomen grew uncomfortably warm, and my breathing grew heavier.

“Your Majesty,” I stammered.

Still holding my hand, he trailed his lips along my wrist. His other hand slid beneath the wide sleeve of my gown, brushing against the inside of my arm. His large hand stopped at my forearm, the calluses on his palm rough against my skin. The contrast in texture sent an unfamiliar but not unwelcome sensation coursing through me.

I let out a shaky breath, my eyes fluttering shut. He kissed my closed eyelids, then my temples, cheeks, nose, and jawline, before returning to my lips. Every kiss felt different—slow, deliberate, and intimate. The silk sheets rustled softly beneath us, and faint, forbidden sounds escaped between our joined lips.

Though his kisses were fervent, his hands never strayed below my upper body. His touches remained on my arms, shoulders, and back, respectful yet possessive. When he finally pulled back, lightly biting my lower lip, I was left dazed and breathless.

I blinked slowly, my lips swollen and tender. The Grand Duke leaned in with a soft cloth to wipe away the moisture on my lips, the gesture oddly tender despite the faint sting of the contact.

“That’s enough for tonight.”

“Tonight…?”

Did that mean there would be more? My thoughts were too muddled to process the implications. He pulled me into his arms, holding me close as I lay limp from the intensity of his kisses. Exhausted, I let myself drift off in his embrace.

When I blinked awake, something strange hovered in my vision.

“…”

“Did you sleep well?”

The strange thing spoke.

It was the Grand Duke.

There was no way he’d still be here in the morning, yet here he was, his presence as imposing as ever. Memories of last night came flooding back—the deep kisses, the heat of his touch—and my face burned red.

I stared at him, mouth agape, as he called for someone outside. Moments later, Boen arrived with washing water, pulling back the bed curtains. It was still early; the sky outside the window was a dark blue.

Even after washing, my thoughts remained scattered. The Grand Duke didn’t leave the room and stayed unusually close.

“Shall we have breakfast? It’s still a bit early…”

“Oh, Your Majesty, are you hungry?”

I had no appetite yet, but I was willing to summon breakfast if he needed it. I reached for the curtain cord, but he shook his head.

“No, only if you’re hungry.”

“I’m fine for now.”

“Good.”

He spread his arms slightly, beckoning me.

“Then come here. Let’s stay like this a little longer.”

“Your Majesty, what about your duties…?”

“It’s only five in the morning.”

Isn’t this when he would usually leave to start his day? Still puzzled, I hesitantly allowed myself to lean into his arms. It wasn’t as embarrassing as last night, but it was still awkward. As I squirmed slightly in his warm embrace, a sudden knock shattered the calm.

Bang, bang!

“Your Majesty! It’s Leon!”

“What is it?”

“There’s been an avalanche in Kirevo!”

The Grand Duke bolted upright.

Kirevo was a mountainous region notorious for heavy snowfall and frequent avalanches. Despite the measures taken to prevent disaster, large-scale avalanches sometimes overwhelmed preparations, leading to severe casualties.

The Grand Duke departed for Kirevo immediately, leaving me behind to manage other tasks. Anxiety gnawed at me as I waited for news of his return. My heart nearly stopped when word reached me that a second avalanche had struck, and the Grand Duke had been buried under the snow.

I mounted my horse in a frenzy, hardly aware of what I was doing. As I prepared to ride out, I spotted Reya standing in the inner courtyard. Her expression was detached—no, indifferent.

There was no time to ponder her reaction. I spurred my horse into a gallop, racing through the estate gardens and toward Kirevo. The journey took about forty minutes, not too far but agonizingly long given the circumstances.

Kirevo was a scene of chaos. The disaster had left the area in shambles, but the dispatched knights were already working methodically to restore order. Leading the efforts was Sir Leon, who rushed over the moment he saw me.

“Your Majesty! What are you doing here?”

“His Majesty…”

“Why would I?”

“…”

From behind Sir Leon, the Grand Duke stepped forward. His face was perfectly composed, without a scratch. I stared at him in stunned silence before mumbling like a fool.

“I heard you were buried in the avalanche, so I…”

The Grand Duke frowned.

“How did such news reach the estate?”

“I don’t know,” I replied, though the thought of Erma immediately crossed my mind. I felt like I’d been duped. If the Grand Duke had been injured, my role as the Grand Duchess would have been to stay at the estate, ready to receive updates and make preparations for any emergency. Running off to Kirevo had been reckless, unbecoming of my position.

“I’m sorry, Your Majesty. I…”

I was about to apologize for acting so rashly, but my words were cut short as the Grand Duke strode closer. I quickly dismounted, and he caught me by the waist to steady me. My entire body was trembling after galloping to Kirevo in such haste.

With his gloved hand, the Grand Duke gently pressed against the corner of my eye.

“…Have you been crying?”

“Pardon?”

I touched my eyes and realized they were damp. My face flushed with embarrassment.

“N-no, it’s just… the cold wind from riding.”

“Is that so?”

The Grand Duke smiled faintly and brushed my shoulder gently.

“There weren’t many casualties. A few people were injured, but no one was buried. Sir Leon.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“I’ll leave the rest to you.”

“Of course, Your Majesty.”

Sir Leon bowed deeply. The Grand Duke glanced at me and then at Shasa, my horse.

“Will you be able to ride back?”

“Yes, I’ll manage.”

Admitting I couldn’t ride back would have been too embarrassing. Thankfully, the well-trained Shasa carried me safely back to the estate without incident, though my legs were trembling so badly by the time I dismounted that I could barely stand.

Determined not to appear weaker than I already had, I forced myself to walk steadily, even as my legs threatened to give out. The Grand Duke silently followed me all the way to my chambers. The moment we stepped inside, my strength abandoned me, and I collapsed into a heap.

“Goodness.”

The Grand Duke came over, lifting me effortlessly and settling me into a soft chair.

“I’m sorry, Your Majesty.”

“There’s nothing to apologize for. …Were you that worried?”

“Yes…”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not something you need to apologize for.”

“Perhaps not, but I feel guilty nonetheless.”

The Grand Duke’s expression showed genuine discomfort, which made me feel even worse. After all, it was my mistake for acting on false information without verifying it. As I sighed and looked up, he leaned down, bracing himself against the back of the chair, and kissed me.

“…”

The kiss was deepening when a composed knock at the door interrupted us. Resili returned, her face betraying slight unease.

“What is it? Who’s at the door?”

I asked warily, half-expecting Erma. Resili glanced briefly at the door before answering.

“Lady Reya Ail is here.”

Both the Grand Duke and I stiffened at once. Unbidden, the memory of Reya’s expression as I rode out earlier flashed through my mind. Had she known the Grand Duke was safe all along? Was that why she had looked at me with such detachment?

I glanced at the Grand Duke questioningly. He nodded.

“Let her in.”

Moments later, Reya entered, guided by Resili. She came before us and knelt.

“Reya Ail greets His Majesty the Grand Duke and Her Majesty the Grand Duchess.”

“…Please, stand and take a seat,” I offered.

But Reya shook her head and, remaining on her knees, fixed her gaze on the Grand Duke.

“Your Majesty.”

“…”

“You must honor your promise.”

“Reya.”

“I will bring my younger sibling.”

My chest tightened as if a heavy weight had dropped into it.

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