Hints at GL - Chapter 23

Chapter 23

10:00 AM – LSE Robbins Library

“Oho, not out on a date?” Zhong Ning was standing in front of the book return machine on the first floor. Just as she took her books out, she heard a familiar voice behind her.

She turned around and was surprised to see Jing Yang. “What are you doing here?” Zhong Ning lowered her voice, “Aren’t you supposed to be behaving and writing your thesis? Is there a need to be so dramatic?”

“I’m not like you. We have so many references to read in Media, I’m too lazy to lug them all back to the dorm.” Jing Yang watched her take out her card to scan the barcode, teasing from the side, “Oh, then again, I suppose some people have a ‘date’ waiting upstairs even after returning their books.”

Jing Yang seemed to know her itinerary well, and this time Zhong Ning had no rebuttal.

To be fair, Su Yuan had indeed confirmed with her last night. Since they both happened to have very few classes today, they agreed to review in the library for a while before heading to that specific bar in the afternoon for a field investigation.

However, she couldn’t tell Jing Yang about that. Moreover, since she wasn’t even sure if she should say yes to Su Yuan, she could only let the other girl’s imagination run wild.

“What exactly is the ‘rhythm’ between you two…?”

Jing Yang draped an arm over her shoulder and lowered her voice; she had been dying to ask ever since that outdoor concert.

The question instantly pulled Zhong Ning back to the scene from that night. She dazed for a moment as the memory of those lips against hers whispering, “Do you like it?” seemed to echo again. Masking her fluster, she stuffed the books into the machine and whispered, “Are you free right now? Let’s talk outside.”

“She confessed?!”

The two were sitting on a wooden bench outside the library. Jing Yang’s somewhat loud exclamation drew sideways glances from passing fellow students. Zhong Ning nodded awkwardly. “She asked if I was willing…”

“So, do you plan to say yes?”

“…” Zhong Ning thought for a long time but couldn’t find the words.

“I’m very conflicted…” At the end of the day, even though her heart had been stirred, she was still apprehensive. “First, there’s Ruan Mu—I keep feeling like Su Yuan hasn’t moved on from her. Second, Jing Yang… you know it’s already the end of the year. We’ll be graduating in just over six months.”

What she meant was: even if she stayed with Su Yuan, would there really be a future?

Before deciding to come abroad, she had always planned to return to China after graduation. And given the current situation, she wished she could hop on a plane tomorrow, because going back meant there wouldn’t be a threat to her life.

“I don’t know… if I should say yes to her,” Zhong Ning said, deeply troubled.

“Actually, Su Yuan was right to ask; that’s exactly what she wants to know,” Jing Yang looked straight at her. “What kind of relationship do you actually want to have?”

“Everyone’s needs in love are different. For example, Sandra from your Banking major and her boyfriend—both come from good families and aren’t going to move to another city for the other. Even though they both know there’s no future, it doesn’t stop them from dating. At worst, they just break up.”

“What do you think they’re after? Happiness, obviously.”

“I know you’re not that type, but I really think you’re living a pretty dull life by agonizing over this constantly,” Jing Yang paused before continuing. “Just say whether you like her or not. If you like her, be together; if not, stay apart. Why is it so difficult?”

Zhong Ning took a deep breath. “You make it sound easy. What would you do if you were dealing with the Ruan Mu situation?” Even with what Su Yuan had said, she still couldn’t let it go. “You saw Ruan Mu. Do you think I can compare to an ex like that?”

Jing Yang stared at her, suddenly feeling a surge of frustration. “With all this internal monologue, are you trying to turn into my sister?”

Zhong Ning was momentarily speechless. She really couldn’t… refute that. But she felt that what Jing Yang was saying today was a bit different from before.

“You… didn’t say that before. Do you have a split personality?” she asked tentatively.

“Pah! You’re the one with a split personality,” Jing Yang snapped, though she felt her logic was sound. “I can say frankly that I don’t have a particularly good impression of Su Yuan. But that was then. Haven’t you noticed that over the last two weeks, you’ve basically become inseparable?”

Zhong Ning was stunned. Was she talking about how she and Su Yuan were always together? But that wasn’t because of dating, it was because… they had serious business to attend to.

“So, if you want to be together, just be together. I dislike people like you most, you complain to me when you’re unhappy, I say forget it, and then the two of you stick together faster than anyone,” Jing Yang rolled her eyes, clearly having been annoyed for a long time.

“It’s fine, if you say yes, you say yes. I’m not mad,” Jing Yang’s tone shifted as she added, “Don’t think too much. Even if you break up when you go back to China, it’s not embarrassing to have dated a high-quality, wealthy beauty like her.”

Zhong Ning felt her friend was starting to talk nonsense and sighed helplessly. “…You’re getting further and further off track.”

Jing Yang gave her one last look and said only one thing: “I’ll give you a piece of advice: go be with her without holding onto any hope. That way, it’s better for everyone.”

It was around teatime. There weren’t many people on the streets, and the rare sunlight peeking through the clouds was somewhat piercing.

Until the moment she met Su Yuan, she had been thinking about Jing Yang’s words. Since the confession that night, Su Yuan hadn’t pressed for an answer, but the frequency of her contact had noticeably increased.

Without holding onto any hope…

Zhong Ning sighed inwardly and couldn’t help but look at Su Yuan beside her.

“What is it?” That gentle gaze turned toward her. Zhong Ning’s face flushed, and she instinctively diverted the topic. “Nothing… I was just thinking that this street isn’t far from our school.” She turned back as a distraction, and the Old Building immediately came into view.

“Does it feel familiar?” Su Yuan looked at her deeply, not exposing her distraction.

“I just find it strange. I’ve walked this path many times…” Zhong Ning suppressed her inner emotions; she felt something was wrong but couldn’t quite put it into words. “But in the dream, I didn’t find it familiar at all. I’ve clearly walked here, yet it felt like a stranger’s place. How can that be?”

“Maybe it’s because we just came from that tube station and didn’t walk through Holborn,” Su Yuan comforted her softly, whether or not she understood the incoherent rambling.

Before long, they arrived at the bar entrance.

Zhong Ning looked at the gold lettering on the sign—STARS. This was the place… She took a deep breath. The moment her hand touched the door, her heart skipped a beat, as if a strong sense of destiny was surging up, even though she had never actually been inside.

The two pushed the door open, and the rich scent of wood and alcohol hit them. The bar’s decor was exactly as she had seen in her dream. On the west side was a long bar counter, while the east wall was lined with circular sofas, with wooden tables scattered in the open space.

Zhong Ning pulled Su Yuan to sit at the bar, her mind a whirlwind of emotions. “It’s right here…” Her gaze passed by Su Yuan, looking directly at the sofa in the right corner. “I sat right there and saw the carnage over there… and then, you walked toward me.”

“And then?”

“What did I do to you?” Su Yuan stared at her, a smile playing on her lips. “It seems you’ve never told me that part. Is it too embarrassing to say?”

Zhong Ning instantly remembered the scene: Su Yuan leaning down, caressing her face, and whispering with warm breath, “Why are you still here… aren’t you afraid of dying?”

That image, unsurprisingly, overlapped with the scene inside the car from the other day. Zhong Ning’s face turned red and she said, “I… I’m not telling you.”

Seeing her flushed and flustered, Su Yuan narrowed her eyes slightly. “Did I kiss you?”

“Kiss what kiss…” Zhong Ning instinctively bit her lip. But then she thought back—on the night she witnessed Ruan Mu and Su Yuan kissing, she had indeed dreamed that Su Yuan kissed her. That memory made her stumble over her words. “…Be serious.”

Su Yuan turned her body, her slender arm propped lightly on the bar. “Is that so?” She curled her lips. “Then what exactly was it?”

Zhong Ning tried to remain calm while explaining. “You just asked why I hadn’t left yet, if I wasn’t afraid of dying, and then…” She paused, realizing there was no point in hiding things if they were trying to solve the mystery. Her voice grew smaller and smaller. “You pinned me against the bar… and then I woke up.”

Su Yuan’s gaze deepened, and she was about to say something when—

“What can I get you?” A uniformed waitress handed them the drink menu and struck up a conversation with a smile. She was an exquisitely made-up British woman; she looked nothing like the person Zhong Ning had seen in her dream.

Su Yuan casually ordered two drinks, then stopped the woman to ask, “Excuse me, do you have a blonde male waiter here? A bit taller than you.”

“A blonde male waiter?” The woman looked at Su Yuan with surprise. She thought for a while but couldn’t seem to recall anyone, so she asked a chubby male waiter in the distance. The two exchanged a look and both shook their heads. “No, it’s just the two of us serving right now.”

Just then, a “creak” came from behind them as someone pushed open the door.

The chubby waiter looked up and suddenly had an epiphany. “Oh, the blonde man! Are you talking about the guy who just came in for an interview?”

The man at the door was wearing a simple, thin hoodie, his blonde hair resting softly against his forehead. He stood at the entrance as the few customers and the two waiters all stared at him. He turned up the corners of his mouth and smiled. “Hi, did I come at a bad time?”

The chubby waiter began placing glasses onto a tray one by one, raising an eyebrow. “Not at all, mate. The manager said for you to start tomorrow.”

The blonde man nodded understandingly, his eyes squinting into a smile. “You all looked at me so suddenly, I thought I’d done something wrong.”

The fat man carried the tray over to him and pointed toward the bar. “Oh, it’s because those two beautiful ladies were just asking about you.” He shrugged and joked, “Suddenly asking if we have a blonde waiter. Looks like I should go get a dye job; maybe then someone will hit on me.”

Hearing the explanation, the blonde man walked toward them with a friendly smile. “It’s an honor. Do I know you?”

Zhong Ning stared at him for a long time, unable to say a word. She was certain: the person in her dream was definitely the man standing before her. But why? He was just starting his job… Was the reason the dream hadn’t come true for so long because of this person?

The apprehension and unease in her heart were clear to the woman beside her. Su Yuan looked at Zhong Ning and smiled as she answered for her, “We made a mistake. We remembered the wrong shop. Sorry.”

The blonde man didn’t seem to mind. He simply smiled and extended his hand toward them. “No problem. My name is Shaw. I hope you’ll visit often.”