Hedgehog's Belly - Chapter 29

Chapter 29

Yan Qingzhu’s icy fingertips lightly brushed across Luo Mu’s cheek, her knuckle hooking the tip of Luo Mu’s nose. Her tone was soft: “Does this mean you want a lot of love?”

“No,” Luo Mu raised her eyes to gaze at the boisterous crowd before ducking away like a hedgehog, covering her mouth with her hands and breathing out hot air. “It means I want to keep a portion of love for myself.”

Yan Qingzhu smiled faintly, her gaze misty. At this moment, she finally understood why she had become interested in the girl before her. She rested her arm on Luo Mu’s shoulder and looked up, laughing freely and without concealment: “Then I’ll give a portion of my love to Sister Muzi, too.”

“Yan Qingzhu, you know that extremes produce the opposite of what is intended.” Luo Mu allowed the teasing, the corners of her mouth finally curving upward.

Yan Qingzhu: “I would accept that gladly.”

As the crowds on the streets of Lingyang dispersed, Luo Mu assumed Yan Qingzhu had long since settled on a place to stay. But when 1:00 AM arrived and the streetlights remained lit with no sign of the other girl turning back, Luo Mu frowned.

“Where are you going back to in a bit?” Luo Mu clutched her bouquet, taking small, hesitant steps, her leather shoes scuffing against the ground.

“I don’t know,” Yan Qingzhu replied naturally, hands tucked into her trench coat pockets.

Hearing this, Luo Mu stopped in her tracks and said with a half-smile, “So, are you sleeping on the street?”

“Will Sister Muzi pick me up then?” A smile danced in Yan Qingzhu’s bright eyes, clearly pushing the girl in front of her to the point of embarrassment.

It wasn’t that Yan Qingzhu had nowhere to go; Brother Wang had booked a hotel for her in Lingyang long ago, less than a kilometer away. However, as she spoke, she pushed the room card deeper into her coat pocket to prevent it from being discovered.

She had calculated this quite well.

Luo Mu seemed stunned for a few seconds before finally saying, “Alright.”

What Yan Qingzhu hadn’t expected was that Luo Mu would actually take her back to her aunt’s house. Luo Mu could still vaguely remember the surprised look on Qiu Shuangyi’s face when she opened the door. It took a long explanation from Luo Mu for Qiu Shuangyi to process the situation.

“Cousin, I’ve put the toiletries for you and your friend in your room.” Qiu Shuangyi handed a towel to Luo Mu, whispering: “Sister, it’s late, make sure to get some rest. Don’t pay any mind to the things my mother said.”

Qiu Shuangyi’s words happened to coincide with Yan Qingzhu passing by. Yan Qingzhu’s eyes instantly turned sharp and piercing, scaring Qiu Shuangyi into averting her gaze and stammering incoherently.

Under the dim light of the room, Luo Mu used a towel to dry her freshly washed hair, which gave off a faint lavender scent; water droplets still clung to her face. Beside her, Yan Qingzhu sat in a chair, casually scrolling through her phone while leaning her head back, observing Luo Mu for a long time. The silent atmosphere and the feigned lies made Yan Qingzhu feel uneasy.

“I thought you were joking,” Yan Qingzhu finally broke the silence.

The corners of Luo Mu’s lips turned up—she was indeed smiling. Hanging the towel over her shoulder, her voice carried a hint of raspiness as she drew out her words: “Did you really think I’d let you sleep on the street?”

Yan Qingzhu turned and rested her hand on the back of the chair. Under the reflection of the light, she caught a glint of something bright on Luo Mu’s neck.

“The new necklace is very beautiful.” Yan Qingzhu leaned on her arm, her hazy vision seemingly covered by a layer of mist. The perfect harmony of light and shadow made Luo Mu’s figure appear balanced and graceful.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Luo Mu heard the compliment and looked down hesitantly, her eyelashes trembling slightly. Her right hand repeatedly toyed with the pendant of the necklace, her expression revealing a sense of grievance and embarrassment.

“What’s ‘beautiful’ or ‘not beautiful’ about something that doesn’t belong to me?” Luo Mu murmured.

Yan Qingzhu fell silent, knowing she had said the wrong thing.

“When I was a kid, I tricked my cousin into going into the water by lying and saying I lost a necklace. That kid actually soaked in the water to look for it.” Luo Mu turned on the hairdryer to manage her hair. The operating noise wasn’t piercing, and Yan Qingzhu could still hear Luo Mu’s voice.

Yes, that child really did go look for it—exactly as Luo Mu had expected.

But today, when Qiu Shuangyi gave Luo Mu a brand new necklace, it was entirely unexpected.

“She never found it back then. When I came to see her today, she gave me a new one.” Luo Mu shook her head, spreading her hair evenly. A surge of emotion rose in her eyes, yet her expression remained as silent as stagnant water. “But the truth is, I didn’t lose a necklace back then.”

Or to put it another way, Luo Mu didn’t have a necklace at all.

She recalled when Qiu Shuangyi met her; the girl told her to close her eyes and then hung a brand new necklace around her neck. Luo Mu was shocked and about to take it off to return it, but Qiu Shuangyi just smiled and said softly: “I’ve always felt guilty about not being able to find your necklace when we were little. So I bought a new one for you.”

Luo Mu couldn’t bear it. Her gaze darkened as shame and guilt took over. A cold sweat broke out on her back and her lips trembled slightly. She stared at Qiu Shuangyi, clutching her sleeves tightly, and forced a smile.

“Shuangyi, I actually didn’t have a necklace.”

The words drifted through the air, faint and distant.

She thought Qiu Shuangyi would fly into a rage over the deception, but the girl showed no sign of surprise. Instead, she seemed relieved, her eyes shimmering as she shrugged.

Qiu Shuangyi nodded and said calmly: “I know.”

It turned out she had known all along.

Qiu Shuangyi’s voice was very soft, but when it hit Luo Mu’s ears, her heart skipped a beat. Grief and emptiness intertwined in a complex knot, making Luo Mu’s nose sting.

“Yan Qingzhu, tell me, do I really deserve to die?” Luo Mu turned off the hairdryer, returning the room to silence, a trace of self-mockery on her face.

Born with a defense mechanism and having never received protection from her parents, she was like a hedgehog forever curled up in her own tiny space. She lived like a venomous dagger, making it impossible for anyone to reach her soft, blunt side. Wandering and lost, Luo Mu might never be able to perceive the correct answers to life.

Sincerity obtained through hypocrisy truly left one feeling powerless.

Yan Qingzhu stood up and sat back on the bed, the blankets carrying a light scent of freshly washed jasmine. She dimmed the bedside lamp and leaned over to touch Luo Mu’s hair to check if it was dry.

“Your hair is dry.”

Yan Qingzhu rubbed Luo Mu’s head, her gaze shallow, tenderness touching the corners of her eyes and brows.

Her tone carried a hint of frankness: “Muzi, we shouldn’t judge our past selves using the knowledge we have now.”

But Luo Mu, there is no one who doesn’t make mistakes.

“I always thought Qiu Shuangyi had been tormented by this for all these years.”

Luo Mu tilted her head back and let out a sigh, her lips trembling. Her voice was low and hoarse, as if it took all her strength to speak.

“In the end, it turns out the one being tormented was me.”

Then I truly deserved it.

She had always known that Aunt Qiu held a grudge over this matter, but because her precious daughter so clearly adored this cousin with no blood relation, Aunt Qiu could only turn a blind eye.

And Qiu Shuangyi knew her mother’s habits; she knew her mother would wait until she wasn’t around to say piercing, aggressive things to Luo Mu. So whenever they met, Qiu Shuangyi would tell Luo Mu not to take it to heart.

Luo Mu would just smile and nod, but the things Aunt Qiu said weren’t exactly wrong.

“I always said there was something wrong with a daughter who has no mother!”

“What, if I hadn’t been there, my daughter would have been drowned by her long ago!”

“Her mother sought death, so she wants others to die too. Tell me, how can someone be so terrifying!”

Later, the story spread further and wider, even being exaggerated to the point where Luo Mu had supposedly throttled Qiu Shuangyi and forcibly held her underwater.

In the past, Luo Mu would instinctively want to explain herself when hearing these things. But as she grew older, she lost the desire to argue. Eventually, when relatives asked her for the truth, Luo Mu would simply nod and admit to it. But her stepmother had always believed in her, comforting her and telling her not to mind the rumors. Luo Mu never cared about those people’s opinions; what was right or wrong, or what constituted a merit or a mistake, wasn’t for her to decide anyway.

Luo Mu sat blankly on the bed, only coming back to her senses after a long silence. She glanced at the clock: 1:50 AM.

She turned to look at Yan Qingzhu. The other girl was propping her head up with one hand, her eyes bright and showing no signs of fatigue.

“It seems you aren’t sleepy either.” Despite her heavy mood, Luo Mu couldn’t help but laugh.

Luo Mu stood up to straighten the quilt and then curled her whole body up under the covers. In Yan Qingzhu’s view, the blankets formed a small mountain peak. Seeing this, Yan Qingzhu was genuinely amused.

“Muzi, are you a hedgehog?”

“Mm.” Luo Mu hid under the covers, drawing out the sound into a long, soft, non-aggressive tail.

“Do you know what a hedgehog’s belly looks like?” Yan Qingzhu couldn’t help but laugh as she asked.

The response came: “Hedgehogs don’t have ankles.”

Yan Qingzhu laughed quietly to herself, unable to stop for a long time. That was until she heard a small sob from under the quilt. Luo Mu was curled up tightly, even her head wrapped up completely.

After a long time, a voice came from under the covers.

“I don’t think growing up is a very happy thing.”

Growing up brings all beautiful moments to a screeching halt, tearing them to shreds like thin paper. It forcibly destroys one’s original worldview and reconstructs a set of rules for a world that subverts all prior understanding.

It is a constant, repetitive goodbye to one’s former self.

Yan Qingzhu’s lips lifted slightly as she rubbed the curled-up little thing through the quilt. She said calmly, “I don’t know how to convince you otherwise.”

While rubbing Luo Mu’s head through the covers, Yan Qingzhu leaned against the pillow, her mind wandering as she stared at the ceiling.

“Because I am very lost, too.” Yan Qingzhu’s voice was raspy, and her breathing seemed difficult.

But if we keep walking, there will be a path.

Yan Qingzhu paused. “But I will always be with you.”

Allow me to be idle for this moment, just to be by your side.

“Not leaving?” Luo Mu’s head was covered by the quilt, her voice muffled, but Yan Qingzhu heard it clearly.

Yan Qingzhu’s answer was firm: “Not leaving.”

Yan Qingzhu’s fingertips brushed against the surface of the quilt, comforting the girl who was as sensitive as a hedgehog. The sharpness faded from her eyes, leaving only a sense of calm.

Under the covers, the girl lowered her eyes. She couldn’t see Yan Qingzhu’s expression; she didn’t know if the girl was serious or joking. After all, it wasn’t the first time Yan Qingzhu had made her the butt of a joke.

Liar. The road of life is so long; Luo Mu knew all too well that many people are only meant to accompany you for a segment of it, including the person making this promise right now.

Forget it. A tiny, faint smile formed in the depths of Luo Mu’s eyes.

One segment is fine. It’s enough.

One shouldn’t be too greedy.

“Yan Qingzhu.” Luo Mu finally poked her head out, the quilt still swaddling her entire body.

“Mm.” Yan Qingzhu took a sip of hot water and put the glass back on the nightstand.

“Can you die from staying up this late?” Luo Mu teased. It was a joke; for high school students at Tianzhong, it was perfectly normal for people to be studying by lamplight at 2:00 AM.

“It’ll make you stay short.” Yan Qingzhu was about to turn away but suddenly looked up and rubbed Luo Mu’s head. Their eyes met, and Luo Mu saw her own reflection in Yan Qingzhu’s pupils. “You’ll stay 1.5 meters forever.”

Luo Mu knew the other girl was jabbing at her height again, but she just mumbled with a smile, “I’m already over 1.5 meters, I’m not growing anymore.”

The look in Yan Qingzhu’s eyes was soft, like a steaming cup of cocoa in the middle of winter. She showed Luo Mu a screenshot of her travel tickets and asked calmly: “Let’s go home together tomorrow.”

Let’s go home together. Just like we used to.

“I’ve calculated it; the bullet train back to Chujiang takes about five or six hours.” Yan Qingzhu replied confidently. “It’s too boring alone; the two of us can talk to each other.”

“Aren’t you afraid I’ll find you too noisy?” Luo Mu pinched the quilt, wrapping herself up so tight not a breath of wind could get in.

Yan Qingzhu burst out laughing: “Of course you won’t.”

Luo Mu thought about the route home. Yan Qingzhu was right; the distance between Lingyang and Chujiang was five or six hours, but the gap in development between the two cities wasn’t something six years could bridge.

“Aren’t you taking a plane?” Luo Mu asked instinctively.

Yan Qingzhu gave a difficult smile and offered a random reason without hiding anything: “I’m afraid of heights.”

“So tall, yet afraid of heights.” Luo Mu teased her.

Yan Qingzhu didn’t panic at all, countering: “Aren’t we both afraid of heights?”

Luo Mu instantly understood her meaning and pinched her arm hard.

“Trapping me in your words again.”

At 2:30 AM, in the pitch black, Yan Qingzhu slowly sat up in bed, feeling a wave of dizziness. She turned to look in the other direction, watching the figure with its back turned, and asked in a low, raspy voice: “Luo Mu, are you asleep?”

“You once said that the girl reflected in the sunset can be granted the right to be loved,” Yan Qingzhu murmured, her tone peaceful.

“But that’s not how it is. You were always worthy of being loved.”

“And you deserve to receive a lot of love, too.”