Did My Wife Break Up With Me Today? - Chapter 77

Chapter 77: *

[“Gege, how do you write your name?”]

[“Gege, can you come to the park and play with me?”]

[“Gege, do you not like playing with me? Why are you leaving?”]

[“Gege, if you leave, will you ever come back?”]

Memories sealed away for long years, covered in a thick layer of dust, suddenly tunneled into Chen Kongqing’s central nervous system. It wasn’t just these scattered words; fragmented images rushed in. They were like a heavy veil—he couldn’t see clearly, yet they felt intimately familiar.

A familiar park, familiar toys, a familiar old building from another era…

The nerves in his forehead throbbed violently, sending jolts of pain through his skull. His vision blurred. Chen Kongqing staggered, collapsing onto the sofa. It took several seconds for the world to come back into focus.

Xu Jingmo must have heard the commotion. He hurried out of the kitchen carrying a plate of fruit. “What’s wrong?”

He saw Chen Kongqing slumped in the armchair, his face deathly pale, still clutching the phone. His eyes were hollow.

“What is it? Where does it hurt?” Xu Jingmo rushed to his side, set the fruit on the coffee table, and felt Chen Kongqing’s forehead. No fever. “Is it… the aftereffects?”

He remembered Chen Kongqing having episodes like this before.

“Mm…” Chen Kongqing gripped the fabric over his heart, gasping for air as he processed the sudden influx of memories.

“Did the doctor say the aftereffects would get worse?” Xu Jingmo frowned, sitting down beside him and pulling the young man’s thin shoulders into an embrace. “I’ll contact a specialist. We need to check this; I’m not at ease.”

“I think… I just remembered a lot.” Chen Kongqing finally steadied his breathing, though he kept his hand clenched over his chest. He stared at the wooden floor in a daze. “Why… why is my nickname in your phone ‘Xiao Man’?”

The man holding him stiffened. His Adam’s apple bobbed.

“Why is it that in the things I just remembered… you seem to be there?” Chen Kongqing finally turned his head to look at Xu Jingmo. For some reason, even though Xu Jingmo was right there, everything felt hazy.

“I…” After a long silence, Xu Jingmo finally prepared to speak.

But Chen Kongqing cut him off. “Forget it… forget it. If they are bad memories, don’t tell me.”

If his brain had gone to such lengths to discard these memories, they must be painful. Just thinking about a few flashes made him start crying for no reason. If it was that painful, he’d rather not know.

Chen Kongqing suddenly lunged into Xu Jingmo’s arms, like a fish that had been out of water too long finally falling back into a cool spring. He buried himself deep, seeking the only sense of security he had left.

Xu Jingmo fell silent. His large hand cradled the back of the rabbit’s head, stroking it with extreme gentleness. “Okay. If you don’t want to know, you won’t know.”

That night, Chen Kongqing was in a fragile state. Xu Jingmo didn’t leave; he stayed to sleep with him. The two carrot plushies were finally replaced. They were tossed onto the small sofa, and Xu Jingmo became Chen Kongqing’s new “Abbe” (comfort object).

The rabbit didn’t sleep well. He seemed to be dreaming constantly; his brows knitted together in his sleep, and the corners of his eyes stayed damp. Watching him, Xu Jingmo’s heart ached. All he could do was hold him tighter, and tighter still.

…

In the following days, both of them tacitly avoided the subject. Xu Jingmo wanted to take him to a doctor, but Chen Kongqing refused. He knew he was running away—a subconscious choice to hide from the past. Even though the memories were right beneath the surface, and he sensed Xu Jingmo was the owner of those phoenix eyes from his childhood, he didn’t dare remember.

His psychological state hit a low point. But he didn’t want Xu Jingmo to worry, so he forced himself to act normally. Xu Jingmo saw through the act, of course, and reached out to specialists behind his back to find the best way to help.

…

The Weekend.

Xu Jingmo was on duty. Chen Kongqing was bored at home and didn’t feel like going to the lab. He decided to try making a “lazy person’s cake” to relax. The tutorial was simple: eggs, flour, sugar, and an electric rice cooker. His sparse rental kitchen actually had those ingredients.

To his surprise, he ended up with a perfectly fluffy sponge cake. It was incredibly soft and fragrant. He snapped a photo and sent it to Xu Jingmo.

Azurite: [Photo.jpg] Azurite: [I succeeded!] Azurite: [Want some? I’ll bring it to you!]

Usually, Xu Jingmo was the one picking him up. He had never actually visited Xu Jingmo at his workplace.

Lnk: [Sure.] Lnk: [Do I have that honor?] Lnk: [My stomach is growling just looking at it.] Azurite: [I’ll pack it up. You can share it with your colleagues.] Lnk: [I don’t want to share with them.] Azurite: [Be generous, Dr. Xu.] Lnk: [Fine, whatever my wife says.]

Xu Jingmo called him “wife” quite naturally now. Chen Kongqing still wasn’t used to it; his ears turned red every time.

On the subway to the hospital, Chen Kongqing had a realization. No matter what happened in the past, wasn’t he happy now? Yes. At least right now, he was happy.

He arrived at the hospital in high spirits and headed straight for the 12th floor.

Lnk: [Wait for me in my office.] Lnk: [I have a brief meeting that’s almost over.] Lnk: [Don’t be shy if there are people there; they are all good colleagues.]

The ward wasn’t too crowded. It was quieter than most busy departments. Chen Kongqing walked along the wall until he reached the door marked “Doctors’ Office.” There were people inside. He hesitated, wondering how to introduce himself.

As he stood there, voices drifted from inside.

“The slot definitely belongs to Jingmo this time.” “Likely. He’s the only one in our department qualified and suitable.” “But it’s so far away. I wouldn’t want to go. The food abroad is terrible…” “It’s just—”

Thud.

The food container in Chen Kongqing’s hand hit the floor with a dull sound. The conversation inside stopped abruptly. Chen Kongqing froze, then knelt down with a delayed reaction to pick up the container.

A doctor in a white coat stepped out. “This is…”

Chen Kongqing struggled to control his emotions. Clutching the container, he whispered, “Sorry…” and turned to flee.

His mind was a whirlwind. Going so far away… how far? Xu Jingmo is leaving? Where? For how long? Is it for a long time, and that’s why he didn’t tell me?

Why is he leaving AGAIN?

Wait… why did he think “again”?

Chen Kongqing’s eyes stung. More forgotten memories forced their way into his mind.

…

Xu Jingmo rushed back to the office after his meeting, but the person he expected to see wasn’t there. He checked his phone. No new messages.

“Did a student come by just now?” he asked.

“Yeah, a young man was at the door. He dropped his lunchbox and then ran off in a hurry,” old Dr. Jin replied.

Xu Jingmo’s heart sank. He dialed Chen Kongqing’s number. No answer. On the fifth try, a message finally popped up.

Xiao Man 🥕: [I remembered everything.] Xiao Man 🥕: [So you recognized me from the very beginning, didn’t you?] Xiao Man 🥕: [You always remembered me?] Xiao Man 🥕: [If you remembered me, why didn’t you come looking for me?] Xiao Man 🥕: [Not even once. Why didn’t you look for me once?] Xiao Man 🥕: [When we were separated, was I the only one who was heartbroken?]

Xu Jingmo felt like an invisible hand was squeezing his heart. He could barely breathe. Lnk: [I’m sorry, Xiao Man.] Lnk: [Where are you? Let’s talk in person, okay?] Xiao Man 🥕: [I don’t want to see you right now.] Xiao Man 🥕: [Let me calm down on my own.] Xiao Man 🥕: [Don’t come looking for me. Thank you.]

Looking at that cold, hard “Thank you,” Xu Jingmo felt like he had fallen into an ice cellar. But he couldn’t not look for him.

Chen Kongqing cried for a long time. It wasn’t just because of Xu Jingmo. It was because he remembered his grandmother. His grandmother, the person who loved him most in the world. How could he have forgotten her? How could he have forgotten her for so many years?

In his memory, his grandmother was never young. She always had silver hair and a face full of wrinkles, yet she gave him boundless love. He had been so happy then.

Until the “big brother” who always protected him suddenly left. He remembered wiping away tears, telling Xu Jingmo he wouldn’t forget him. He remembered the exhaust from the car as Xu Jingmo drove away.

Then, not long after, his grandmother fell seriously ill. She started becoming delirious. Then came the black cloth around his arm, and his grandmother being sealed in a black box. Then, he got sick. So sick he forgot everything.

Chen Kongqing curled into a ball. The memories weren’t all painful—many were sweet. But they were all lost. And that loss was what made it so painful.

…

The Next Day.

It was a brilliant sunny day. Chen Kongqing climbed out of bed and felt the warmth of the sun on his skin. He felt alive. He decided to find Xu Jingmo. Despite the emotional flood, he realized he still loved him. He still cared for the cat.

He threw on a jacket and opened the old, creaky door of his rental. Creeeeeak.

Xu Jingmo, who had been sitting by the door all night, snapped his bloodshot eyes open and scrambled to his feet. Chen Kongqing flinched back. “You… why are you here?”

His voice was raspy from crying.

“I… I was worried. I stayed to watch over you,” Xu Jingmo said awkwardly, not daring to step forward. “If you still don’t want to see me, I can go downstairs, but please allow me to stay nearby. Is that okay?”

Chen Kongqing licked his dry lips. “How did you know I was home?”

“I heard the faucet running from outside,” Xu Jingmo said honestly. He looked at the haggard rabbit before him. “Can I buy you breakfast? I won’t come in. I’ll just bring it, and you can take it inside, okay?”

The rabbit’s eyes were swollen, and his face was pale.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…” The man exhaled a long breath, his own voice hoarse.

Chen Kongqing sniffled and remained silent for a moment. “Just… come in.”

He stepped aside. Xu Jingmo froze for a second, surprised, then quickly entered as if afraid Chen Kongqing would change his mind. Once inside, they stood in awkward silence.

“Do you have noodles? I’ll cook some. You haven’t eaten anything,” Xu Jingmo said, turning toward the kitchen.

“Wait…” Chen Kongqing said suddenly. “I’ll listen to your explanation now. Just now. I won’t listen later.”

“Okay… I’ll explain.” Xu Jingmo stood still, his palms sweating. “I didn’t not look for you. I looked for you for a long time.”

“We were in Zijin Town, do you remember? I used to come back on weekends. Later, I had to leave for studies abroad. I sent postcards and gifts to Zijin Town every year, but you must have moved away early. When I returned to China and went back there, very few people remembered you. Only a few elders told me you moved, but they didn’t know where.”

Xu Jingmo’s throat felt tight. In all his years in Germany, he had never forgotten Chen Kongqing.

“I never expected to meet you at the clinic. To find you’d become my patient.” Xu Jingmo smiled bitterly. “And you didn’t remember me. You were even my cousin’s boyfriend. But… I felt I could accept anything, as long as I found you.”

Chen Kongqing listened to the story from the other perspective. He realized Xu Jingmo had been just as helpless.

“So that day at the clinic, you suddenly took off your mask and insisted on driving me home…” Chen Kongqing recalled things he hadn’t scrutinized before. “So you knew I was allergic to anthocyanins, you knew I liked carrots… and my birthday, and my nickname…”

Xu Jingmo nodded like a criminal awaiting sentencing. “Yes… but I didn’t tell you because I was worried it would trigger your condition. I didn’t know if you wanted to remember. I didn’t hide it on purpose.”

Chen Kongqing, eyes swollen like walnuts, walked toward him. “When did you start liking me? Since we were kids?”

“No… as a kid, I just saw you as a younger brother.” Xu Jingmo accepted he wasn’t a man of high morals, but he wasn’t a predator. “It was after meeting you again. Seeing you weren’t doing well made me anxious. I wanted you to be happy. Then, somehow, I realized I was secretly in love with you. I wanted to steal you away from someone else… I wanted to possess you. And even if you want to break up with me now that you know, I won’t agree.”

“I am just… a selfish, despicable person,” Xu Jingmo said with self-deprecation.

Chen Kongqing felt his nose sting again. His eyes grew damp. He walked closer to Xu Jingmo. The man stood still like a statue, restraining himself from touching the boy.

Chen Kongqing grabbed a small corner of Xu Jingmo’s sleeve. He whispered in a tiny voice, “Then… don’t leave me.”

“I would never leave you,” Xu Jingmo said urgently.

Chen Kongqing looked up with red, uncertain eyes. “I don’t believe you.”

“Why?” Xu Jingmo took the cold hand in his. “Tell me, what will make you believe me?”

Chen Kongqing didn’t pull away. He licked his dry lips. He didn’t know how to find certainty. Time ticked by. Then, his willow-leaf eyes shimmered with a mist of tears. He spoke softly but with absolute determination:

“Then… fuck me.”