Crossing the Clouds and Sky to Fall in Love with You - Chapter 52

“I’ve missed you so much, so much…”

“Haiping, you… please don’t.” Siqi finally realized something was amiss. She turned to me. “Xiaoning! She… we…”

I stepped forward and took her arm. The large movement startled the woman named “Haiping.” I pursed my lips and grabbed hold of both of them. “This isn’t a good place to talk.” I decisively made the call for them. The three of us, leaving the staff behind, walked straight toward the exhibition exit.

It wasn’t until we walked out the main doors that I realized… why did I bring my girlfriend’s ex-girlfriend out of the venue with us?

As the cold wind harshly whipped my face, I suddenly had the illusion of being slapped. I held onto Siqi, and Siqi held onto her, the three of us presenting a strange and complex subtle relationship.

That “Haiping” finally looked me straight in the eye. She saw our tightly linked arms, immediately understood, smiled, and released the hand she was holding with Siqi.

“You must be Siqi’s girlfriend? Nice to meet you, I’m Zhu Haiping, Siqi’s former colleague from the bridal studio.” She smiled and extended her hand to me. I stared intently at her pale and sunken cheeks, and I shuddered when I heard her surname.

I didn’t take her hand, my gaze slowly locking onto Siqi’s face. “Her surname is Zhu?”

Siqi understood what I had realized and immediately shook her head. “Xiaoning! It’s not what you think…”

“Your fan page is named after your ex-girlfriend’s surname? Is that right? I haven’t misunderstood, have I?”

She is the reason why Chu is “Chu.”

I should have asked clearly a long time ago, shouldn’t I? Why, when her surname is Tao, did she take a completely unrelated surname as the name for her important fan page? Besides avoiding her family, there was another, more important reason.

But she was always unwilling to say it clearly.

Even after we started dating.

She immediately fell silent. The usually eloquent Siqi stopped speaking because of my string of questions. I was right.

She turned her head away. “I want to change it back to Xiao Jiu… that was the name from the start; you know that.”

“That’s not a reason!” I laughed, but tears surged in my eyes. The stinging pain of being kept in the dark severely wounded me. “If she hadn’t shown up, would you have never told me anything?”

I knew I was overthinking it! This kind of thing could be big or small! If she had told me upfront from the beginning, I wouldn’t have rejected it. She had so many opportunities, yet she adamantly held back!

I glared at her ex-girlfriend, this “unexpected interloper.” “What are you here to see Siqi for? Can I know?”

“I just missed her book signing… Miss, please believe me, I only came to see Siqi, and to tell her… a few things. I have no intention of interfering with your relationship.” Her tone was sincere, and at the same time, she showed her left ring finger. The main diamond on the wedding ring was brilliant and dazzling.

Facing her calm demeanor, I blinked, and the tears finally gave way. “Fine! You two talk, I’ll go back. I’ll excuse myself first!” I forcefully pulled my hand away from Siqi’s. She was tall and long-legged and quickly started to chase me.

“Aren’t you going to listen to what she has to say? She came all this way to see you, your ‘ex-girlfriend’ who’s always on your mind!”

She panicked. It was the first time I’d seen the usually calm Siqi become frantic, so agitated. “I just want you to listen to me!”

“I will listen! I’ll wait for you at home.” I wiped away my tears and forcefully pushed her away. “Don’t follow me. Go catch up with Chu!” Then I ran to the roadside and hailed a taxi. As the taxi pulled away, I saw Siqi’s face filled with sorrow and regret.

I guess I looked the same, too?

I don’t know if they talked or not, but in any case, I came back first; back to the nest where the two of us live.

When I left the exhibition hall, the sky was already overcast. The moment I closed the door, the cold air in the entire house enveloped me like fog, and the sound of “drip-drip-drop” rain came from the window. I took off my jacket, turned on the light, and accidentally kicked something while walking toward the small sofa! It was all my fault for being distracted.

I turned around and knew I had kicked the notebooks Siqi said she was going to throw away.

The notebooks were scattered like a deck of cards spread open. I clutched my stubbed toe, feeling sad while cursing my own foolishness…

One particular small, hardcover notebook caught my attention.

The notebook had a plain red cover with a tie string to keep the pages closed; it was very delicate. This notebook was clearly different from the others… what was written in it?

I picked it up, untied the string, and as soon as I opened the first page, I knew what this booklet was.

Their exchange diary. Tao Siqi’s and Zhu Haiping’s.

Dust had accumulated on the pages. I brushed it off. The first page recorded Siqi’s zodiac sign, blood type… basically her personal data, some of which I didn’t even know! I self-deprecatingly curled my lips. The second page was, of course, Zhu Haiping’s: she was a bit taller than me, blood type A, and her birthday was December 2nd…

This birthday… the same day as Tao Yi’an’s?

A scene of icy, snowy whiteness suddenly leaped into my mind!

‘The snow on the roof of the world symbolizes the person in my heart who is both closest and furthest away…’ I always thought that person was Tao Yi’an. Could there be another answer?

Tears blurred my vision. I bit my lip and continued turning the pages.

Since it was a diary written by two people taking turns, some entries were short, and some were long. The long entries were mostly written by Siqi. Miss Zhu didn’t seem to be good at writing, but her handwriting was beautiful, while Siqi’s was more free-flowing.

The beginning was written diligently. I counted the days and found almost none were skipped. After flipping for a long time, their past sweetness flashed before me—until suddenly, several days were skipped all at once toward the back. I stopped turning the page.

Flipping back, I found that day’s entry was written by Siqi.

‘March 7th, Sunny. Today, work was going well. After successfully finishing a set of wedding photos, I returned to the studio and found you weren’t there. I asked Yuhang, and he stammered that you had left early because you weren’t feeling well. I called you, but your phone was turned off. You finally called me in the evening. Did you know how worried I was? Why was your phone off? I knew that no matter what, I couldn’t just show up at your place. Forget it! I’ll keep the diary for now.’

Then several days were skipped, and with just one glance, I knew the reason.

‘March 19th, Cloudy. Has this diary already lost the reason to be exchanged? Is this the answer you’re giving me? Our conclusion?’ The handwriting was messier than before. I had to rely on the context to deduce the full meaning.

So the reason was… Zhu Haiping finally betrayed her? I immediately went back to find Zhu Haiping’s last handwriting. It was March 6th, which recorded their trip to the night market, and also mentioned that she had been feeling unexplained pain in her lower back recently; that was all.

There were absolutely no signs.

‘March 22nd, Sunny. It’s done. What you two wanted, I did it. This was the hardest photo shoot I’ve ever done. If this is the result you longed for, the method you deliberately used to hurt me, Miss Zhu Haiping, you have achieved your goal. Congratulations to you both.’

How many tears did she shed, how many sighs did she let out before she could write that sentence, “Congratulations to you both”?

That’s right… the wedding photos!

That set of wedding photos stored in the computer.

I jumped up, grabbed the diary, and went to her computer. That set of wedding photos had only flashed before my eyes that one time. I wanted to see… see how she photographed Zhu Haiping and the guy who married her.

Although I had her permission, I rarely used her computer, especially since I had moved my own in and no longer needed to borrow hers… but this time, I absolutely had to.

This computer had an operating system I was unfamiliar with. It took some time to find that folder. Fortunately, her data classification and management were very thorough, so it wasn’t like searching for a needle in a haystack.

I finally found it. Other couples’ files were always labeled with their full names, but this one was different; the folder was simply labeled “Zhu & Huang.”

I clicked it open, and an array of photos was completely laid out before me. Many shots were taken again and again from the same location and angle. And I couldn’t help but slightly question Zhu Haiping’s taste in choosing a partner for a moment… ugh! I’m so mean, but that’s not the point!

I observed them carefully, photo by photo, from the outdoor locations, the white gown, to the evening dress. Among the hundreds of photos, I discovered a common thread related to Zhu Haiping—I was right.

The studio shot was placed at the very end, and it was Zhu Haiping’s only solo picture, the one I had seen before.

Zhu Haiping in the photo looked very young, her complexion plump and healthy, and she had long, black hair, longer than mine. Staring at the beautiful bride in the picture, for a moment, I couldn’t connect the person I had just seen with the one in the photo.

It’s only been three years, hasn’t it? To say she was ravaged by the years… that seems too drastic.

This face, it looks like mine, and yet not quite like mine.

Was it me who reminded Siqi of Zhu Haiping? Is it because I have a face similar to her ex-girlfriend’s that she accepted me without hesitation?

Thinking about it carefully, our connection was quite inexplicable. Before I was dumped by Lu Hanjun, we were just ordinary friends. Although we saw each other often, I was just coming over every day to borrow her TV; we couldn’t really be called close friends…

Yet, when she saw me cry until I fainted from grief, she unhesitatingly carried me back to her room and took careful care of me. She took that step actively and resolutely.

Our relationship completely changed from that moment on.

My gaze returned to the diary. The next pages I flipped through were blank; only a dozen pages were left, marking the end of the exchange diary…

I flipped and flipped, until fewer than five pages remained, and then I saw handwriting again.

It was still written by Siqi.

‘I left. I left the place I once shared with her. Yuhang and the others felt it was a pity for me and kept trying to persuade me to stay. It was probably because the already understaffed studio couldn’t afford to suddenly lose two people—one, the bridal consultant who knew every wedding dress in the studio like the back of her hand, and me, the photographer with the biggest workload. But I knew very well that I couldn’t take photos anymore. I could only apologize to the clients who had originally requested me. I still love photography, but from now on, I don’t want to photograph people anymore.

‘Before I left, Xiao Le handed me a bag. She said it was your instruction. I don’t understand why you specially told her to give this to me. What reason do I have left to wear it?

‘Can I forget all of this by sleeping? If I could, I hope to never wake up again.’

So negative.

My finger gently traced the four words “never wake up.” If I had been there when she wrote this, I would have been very nervous. However, she got through it, at least she didn’t foolishly end up on a path of no return…

That page was indeed the last of the writing.

But on the very last page, she drew a picture.

It was a dress, very simple and elegant in style: a straight neckline cut, a halter design, and a soft, asymmetrical skirt with a slit on the bottom…

‘What reason do I have left to wear it?’ So it was a piece of clothing.

Zhu Haiping was a ‘li mi’—a bridal consultant; the person in the bridal studio who specialized in helping brides choose their gowns.

I put down the diary, my eyes locked on the cabinet where she organized her clothes. From a woman’s perspective, she had very few clothes; they could all fit into just two large storage cabinets.

‘Just an ordinary dark purple dress.’ No, that was not just a dress; it was likely a purple evening gown—’Or do you want to see me wear a skirt? I have one!’

Could the “skirt” she mentioned be this “one and only special item”?

I pulled open one of the boxes. It was filled with various styles of jeans—jeans in different shades of blue, and simple black and white. It wasn’t here.

I opened the cabinet for tops. Her tops were much more colorful, even including an off-the-shoulder top! They were summer clothes; I really wanted to see her wear it. I set them aside and continued searching deeper.

Just like searching for a lost treasure, when my hand touched the flowing chiffon, I bet everything on pulling out the garment hidden deep inside that I couldn’t confirm with my eyes!

It was indeed purple! I shook it open. “This is…”