After My Death, I Became a Heartless Madman - Chapter 51.1

Tangshui Alley wasn’t far from the small apartment. The afternoon breeze was lazily alluring, and the usual dense crowds seemed to have vanished, hiding somewhere to laze about. The road wasn’t particularly busy, so Song Shizhou soon arrived back at her apartment.

She parked the car downstairs. The only downside of open-air parking was how the sunlight intensified through the windshield, scorching her face with an unbearable heat not warmth, but a stifling, prickling discomfort.

Her lip was bitten, leaving a small scab. The taste of blood slowly spread in her mouth, and the sensation of being invaded remained vivid, reminding her of that intoxicating kiss just moments ago.

Miss Bai had kissed her with such focus, as if nothing else in the world mattered, as if her world had narrowed down to just the two of them to those lips that tangled with hers again and again.

She was calmly, madly, losing herself.

Her white hair had fluttered wildly in the cool air, and amidst their fervent entanglement, Song Shizhou could almost hear the frantic pounding of her own heartbeat.

The memory of her lips and tongue being relentlessly claimed was still fresh. Miss Bai had kissed every sensitive spot in her mouth with precision so familiar, so direct, so composed in expressing her love.

It was a kind of calm madness.

For some reason, Song Shizhou suddenly felt thirsty. She took a moment to steady herself in the car before taking a few sips from a water bottle.

The elevator in the small apartment was broken in fact, it had been out of order for a while now. Such were the downsides of living here; tenants’ rights were never guaranteed. Chen Ting had advised her to move, but she found the hassle of relocating too troublesome and had never agreed.

The elevator door on the first floor was wide open, blocked by several repair workers, with a few residents standing nearby.

“It’s been all morning when’s it going to be fixed?”

“I live on the thirteenth floor! There are elderly and children at home, this is just delaying things!”

“The property fees aren’t cheap, and this elevator’s been running for over ten years. Can’t you just replace it?”

The property manager was sweating profusely.

“Almost there, just five more minutes, it’ll definitely be fixed!”

Someone grumbled,

“Five minutes, five minutes, how many times have you said that? Still not fixed!”

“Last time, last time just five more minutes!”

Song Shizhou lived on the seventh floor, an awkward height, neither too high nor too low. She decided to take the stairs.

Both in this life and her past one, she had always maintained a habit of regular exercise. No matter how busy she was, she would spend at least half an hour at the gym after work. Logically, seven flights of stairs shouldn’t have been enough to tire her out.

But perhaps that kiss had drained too much of her energy she had to stop by the fifth floor. A middle-aged woman passed by, glancing at her flushed face before chuckling, “Young people these days, no matter how busy work gets, you still need to take care of your health! If five floors wear you out like this, how are you going to manage after marriage?”

The woman clasped her hands behind her back and walked off as she spoke.

Song Shizhou felt a strange sense of relief.

That woman must have been a beta she hadn’t noticed the overwhelming pheromones clinging to her.

Her flushed face and racing heart weren’t from the climb.

It was because of Bai Ruowei.

That wild, disorienting kiss had completely unsettled her. Her mind was filled with nothing but Bai Ruowei’s arrogant profile that composed expression, that calm descent into madness and surrender.

Her heart, which had sought solace, now raced uncontrollably.

In the spring breeze, Miss Bai’s slender fingers rested against her chest. The wind caught in Song Shizhou’s throat as the lingering kiss finally ended, but its afterglow remained. Bai Ruowei’s delicate hand crept to her heart, the scorching palm pressed against the frantic rhythm beneath.

She let out a soft laugh. “Shizhou, you’re lying.”

“Your heart is beating so fast. You’re not as calm as you pretend to be. You’re clearly flustered.”

She raised an eyebrow, as if victory were assured, though even her hands trembled.

Loving Song Shizhou was the most focused, most relentless, and most arduous battle Miss Bai had ever fought.

“You don’t want to part with me either, do you?”

For a moment, the world fell silent.

Song Shizhou paused in the stairwell, then climbed all seven floors in one breath.

The small apartment still carried traces of osmanthus fragrance, lingering on the narrow bed in the guest room, the same bed Miss Bai had slept in the night before.

She absentmindedly tidied up.

The room was unlit, but the sunset had already dipped below the horizon. Unbeknownst to her, she had been entangled with Bai Ruowei for so long. The dining area was cramped and dim, yet she hadn’t bothered to turn on the light.

She couldn’t tell whether her accelerating heartbeat stemmed from fear of the dark or because of someone else.

Because of who.

Love was never something that yielded to haste. She wanted to stretch out the time they spent together, to think things through properly. Only then could she make the right choice, understand why she stood before that person, and recognize her own mistakes.

But Miss Bai had always been swift, precise, and ruthless.

She knew what she wanted, what she had to sacrifice, and how to act. So she wasted no words, left no room for hesitation.

Song Shizhou bit her lip, an odd sensation stirring in her chest.

On the dining table lay a notebook, its leather cover slightly worn, a long bookmark dangling carelessly. She stood and picked it up, flipping it open.

Inside were records of her expenses over the past month. In an age where digital apps for budgeting were ubiquitous, she still clung to this old-fashioned habit.

Because when her mind was in turmoil, she always needed to write something down.

Like on this page, a sketch of Miss Bai.

A tangle of light-blue ballpoint lines, haphazard yet forming a faint, blurred silhouette against the coarse yellow paper.

Her fingers pressed hard against the page. The moment she saw the drawing, she couldn’t suppress the memory of that wild moment.

Mia had actually arrived on time, only to freeze in place, startled by the unrestrained kiss. Under the curious gazes of passersby, Bai Ruowei finally released her.

Only to sink her teeth deep into Song Shizhou’s lips.

Hard. Painful. Enough to draw blood. Song Shizhou winced, the sting searing, leaving a crimson mark.

Miss Bai’s lips were equally smeared with blood.

Her smile, tinged with scarlet, grew even more mesmerizing whether it was Song Shizhou’s blood or her own from the kiss, a vivid red coiled around her tongue. Her expression was sated, intoxicating.

Mia stood silently by the car, as if urging them to hurry. Bai Ruowei finally noticed her presence. The little black blazer she wore swayed like a skirt as her laughter spun through the air wild, almost unhinged.

“Shizhou, I’m leaving. See you next time.”

The reason for “next time” was that she was going on a business trip for a while.

A rather subtle statement.

She didn’t say “I’ll come find you” or “You must see me,” but simply “See you next time,”

As if certain that she and Song Shizhou would meet again.

“You asked us to reconsider our relationship, but my answer has always been the same.”

“Whether in past lives or now, it’s an answer that will never change.”

The words of a madman are always the most trustworthy, because in the face of madness,

Anything is possible.

…

Perhaps because Miss Bai was temporarily away, Song Shizhou’s life gradually settled into calm. Within three days, the elder sister from Sweetwater Lane called to say the house matter could be finalized.

“My daughter needs money urgently for studying abroad, so we can sign a three-year contract first.”

This shopfront owned by the elder sister was among the best in Sweetwater Lane, both in location and decoration. Song Shizhou rushed over to sign the contract in haste. After pressing her thumbprint, the elder sister held her hand and gave earnest instructions.

“This property was originally meant for our own small business. With this location, I’m not bragging getting it at this rent is practically a steal.”

“I’m renting it to you because you’re a young girl, about my daughter’s age.”

The elder sister couldn’t go three sentences without mentioning her daughter clearly, their mother-daughter bond was strong.

Song Shizhou smiled as the elder sister linked arms with her and continued,

“Ah, young people these days have it tough. Does your family approve of this studio? Didn’t your parents give you any support?”

Family background was somewhat of a taboo topic for Shizhou, one she usually avoided. Seeing the elder sister’s curious expression, she nodded and prepared to gloss over it.

“My family knows. They’re quite supportive.”

“That’s good.”

“Let me tell you, if you’re repainting these walls, you must use high-quality paint. Cheap stuff corrodes the surface. I’ll be blunt, I expect the place returned in the same condition I handed it over.”

Song Shizhou nodded.

“Don’t worry about these things. They’re all clearly stated in the contract. I’ll be careful.”

With that, she took out an exquisitely wrapped box from her handbag and presented it to the elder sister.

“Sis, I’m really grateful you rented this place to me. Just a small token of appreciation, please accept it.”

The elder sister gasped in surprise.

Inside was a pair of exquisitely crafted twin vases.

Having just nitpicked at her tenant, receiving such a lavish gift now made the elder sister somewhat embarrassed.

“We’re doing proper business here you didn’t have to prepare gifts! This is…”

Though pretending reluctance, the elder sister couldn’t help admiring the vases. They were truly beautiful, with delicate patterns, a spray of white plum blossoms against stark black branches, appearing both lovely and austere.

The elder sister looked up in surprise. “Did you make these?”

Song Shizhou nodded, then reconsidered and explained,

“I painted the flowers on them.”

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