Why is This Clingy Snow Leopard Acting So Innocent? - Chapter 50

Chapter 50: Silence — You Seem Quite Casual About Love

On the way back, the sky darkened.

Halfway through the journey, the iron-chained wheels skidded on a patch of slush and ice at the foot of the mountain. Su Wen, who had been fast asleep against the seat, was jolted forward. Before he could even open his eyes, a large hand steadied his head. Once the vehicle stabilized, he was gently moved back into his seat.

In his groggy state, he only heard Cheng Daozhi in the front seat ask, “How is it? Everyone, okay?”

Then came another voice, deep and close: “Yeah, no injuries.”

Finally, silence returned. Su Wen was exhausted; his head tilted to the side, and he drifted back into a deep sleep.

The car swayed for a long time before finally coming to a halt. Su Wen was gently shaken awake. Opening his eyes, he saw the familiar large iron gates of the house, a heavy lock hanging between them, dusted with a layer of fresh snow.

“We’re here,” Yun Shu’s voice sounded beside him.

“Hmm?” Su Wen shook himself awake. “Oh.”

He hadn’t even unbuckled his seatbelt when he was stopped. Cheng Daozhi reached back from the front passenger seat and said, “Wait a second. I need to talk to you. Let’s head to the station first.”

Yun Shu, who had just started to get up, sat back down.

Cheng Daozhi paused for two seconds. “Yun Shu, you can head back first. I have some work matters to discuss with Su Wen.”

“It’s fine,” Yun Shu said, pulling the door shut. “He doesn’t know the way; I can bring him back later.”

“Ah,” for some reason, Cheng Daozhi persisted. “It’s okay. You go back. We’ll drop him off later, don’t worry.”

At this, Yun Shu turned to look at Su Wen, who was now fully awake.

“Oh,” Su Wen nodded, pointing outside. “You head back first. I’ll be back later.”

Yun Shu stared at him for two seconds, seemingly oblivious to the others in the car, and asked, “I’m not coming with you?”

Su Wen snapped into focus. He glanced around; the three in the back were dead to the world, and Shao Han in the front was scrolling through his phone, seemingly unobservant. Only Cheng Daozhi’s gaze lingered on him thoughtfully.

His heart skipped a beat, followed by an inexplicable surge of guilt. He patted Yun Shu’s shoulder. “Yeah, go back. I’ll make my own way back tonight.”

Yun Shu looked like he wanted to say more, but seeing Su Wen’s firm expression, he clamped his mouth shut and got out of the car without a word.

…

Su Wen leaned back against the seat. Cheng Daozhi’s eyes shifted toward him. He asked with feigned bravado, “What are you looking at?”

Cheng Daozhi raised an eyebrow. “Nothing.”

“Nothing” usually meant “something.”

Cheng Daozhi was Su Jiyan’s high school classmate. They had met long ago when she had just been accepted into film school and was chatting about life with his brother. Even back then, Su Wen had been somewhat intimidated by her. Although she spoke gently and acted like a kind older sister, she carried an intensity that made him want to bolt.

When her filming invitation first arrived, he had hesitated for a long time. But seeing it as his last chance, he came. After all these years, Cheng Daozhi had become even quieter, but that underlying pressure hadn’t diminished one bit.

Usually, work discussions didn’t give him this sense of guilt. Su Wen followed her into the office. She sat down, no documents in hand, no computer open.

Her first words after the door closed: “Are you in a relationship?”

Su Wen sat on the chair, the decorative carvings on the back poking painfully into him. After a long pause, he managed: “How did you know?”

Cheng Daozhi’s tone didn’t change; she didn’t sound like she was lecturing him or scolding him. Her gaze swept over him. “If you were a bit more discreet, maybe I wouldn’t have.”

Su Wen: “…”

“I know that every time you film a project, you end up having a ‘thing’ with your co-star,” Cheng Daozhi continued, not bothering to wait for an answer. “But this is a documentary. You cannot be that intimate with your partner during filming.”

“It’s not… I…”

“If everyone ends up focusing on your dating scandals, what’s the point of me filming this?”

As one of the few documentary directors who had won major awards at a young age, Cheng Daozhi cared only about the work. She almost never invited guest stars, fearing that scandals would overshadow the film itself. This time, besides doing a favor for a friend, it was because Su Wen had been quiet for years with no new scandals—he was considered a “clean” actor.

Su Wen lowered his head guiltily. Cheng Daozhi was merciless: “I don’t care if you date or who you date. But if you keep this up, treating your partner like anything but a partner, I would rather reshoot and replace you.”

After a long while, Su Wen replied, “Okay.”

Seeing him with his head down, looking like he’d learned his lesson, Cheng Daozhi’s attitude softened slightly. “You used to date girls, didn’t you? How come you’re ‘equal opportunity’ now?”

Su Wen was silent for two seconds before finally explaining, “Before, those were just scandals created deliberately for promotion.”

“Heh,” Cheng Daozhi looked skeptical. “So what, you’re telling me this is your first love?”

Su Wen nearly rolled his eyes. “In a way.”

A gossipy look flickered across Cheng Daozhi’s face. “Then how long do you plan to stay together? Breaking up after the shoot?”

Su Wen hadn’t actually thought about that. He rubbed his chin. After a long time, he replied, “We’ll just see. Maybe we’ll break up when the filming ends.”

“Ugh,” he added, feeling a sudden wave of impatience, “Anyway, there are no paparazzi here. At worst, I’ll just break up with him before the movie is released, right? It won’t affect you.”

Cheng Daozhi: “…You seem quite casual about love.”

“Whatever,” Su Wen leaned back. “If I like them, I date them. If I don’t, we break up. Is there a problem?”

“Of course not,” Cheng Daozhi made a “be my guest” gesture. “Feel free.”

But she was still curious. As Su Wen stood up to leave, hand on the doorknob, she asked one last question: “What made you like Yun Shu?”

Su Wen smirked. “He’s handsome and knows how to take care of people. You’d like him too if you were me.”

Cheng Daozhi’s lip twitched. “Just… take care of yourself.”

…

Su Wen didn’t care much about the warning. He had a quick, unsatisfying meal at the station—a few bites of a flatbread he couldn’t get used to—and stopped eating. The person he wanted to see most right now was definitely Yun Shu.

Su Wen pushed the door open. Outside was still noisy; two rangers back from patrol were sitting with the film crew, chatting loudly. He was about to ask someone for a ride back when he froze.

By the side of the corridor, Yun Shu stood with his arms crossed, leaning against the wall. Seeing Su Wen emerge, his expression didn’t change, but that usual spark of warmth was missing.

Su Wen’s heart tightened, like a child caught doing something wrong. He tried to start a conversation: “Why are you here?”

Earlier, he had felt he was just being honest—everyone thinks this way, so he felt the facts should be as they were. Even if he didn’t explicitly say he was “just playing,” in reality, could the two of them really make it to the end? As a carpe diem type, he had never considered dating a fan before.

Why did he like him? Because he was a good person, and he was handsome. Was there more? Beyond that, it was just hormones. Su Wen, having never experienced a “real” romance, had let his brain be influenced by hormones and chose the convenience of the person right next to him.

Yun Shu seemingly hadn’t heard. He straightened up and said, “I came to pick you up. It’s not convenient when it’s dark.”

He didn’t hear. Su Wen felt a wave of relief, followed by a strange, lingering guilt. He procrastinated a bit before convincing himself it was fine—after all, he hadn’t heard.

“Okay,” Su Wen responded, reaching out to rest a hand on Yun Shu’s shoulder. “What’s for dinner?”

“Food.”

“…”

Su Wen wanted to test the waters with questions like “When did you get here?” or “How much did you hear?” but he felt too guilty. He didn’t think he was “wrong,” but they were dating, and letting a partner hear a “pre-planned breakup” was… rough. He wouldn’t accept it if the roles were reversed.

At home, Yun Shu pulled dinner out of the thermal pot—sauteed meat slices with some out-of-season dried vegetables he’d found somewhere. On the stove, braised beef was simmering on low heat.

The food was delicious, but Su Wen found the meal agonizing for reasons he couldn’t name. Soon, he realized why.

Yun Shu, who usually liked to sit right next to him, was sitting across from him. He didn’t say a word, seemingly lost in thought.

He heard. That was Su Wen’s first thought.

He’s going to break up with me. That was Su Wen’s second thought.

Until the dishes were washed and the table was cleared, Yun Shu said nothing. But Su Wen couldn’t stand it. The “Did you hear?” that was on the tip of his tongue turned into: “Why aren’t you talking?”

Yun Shu’s hand paused as he held his cup. He looked like he had reached an internal agreement with himself, suddenly flashing a smile. “Oh, I’m just tired from the day.”

Su Wen breathed a genuine sigh of relief. Even if he didn’t know for sure if Yun Shu had heard, at least he didn’t seem affected. He relaxed completely, throwing himself onto the bed. “I’m exhausted. Let’s sleep early.”

Yun Shu remained standing. “Aren’t you going to shower?”

“No,” Su Wen muffled his voice in the pillow, waving a finger. “I’m sleeping smelly today.”

“Alright then.”

Yun Shu turned and went into the bathroom. Su Wen rolled over to lie on his back, feeling like something was missing. When Yun Shu finally got into bed, he realized what it was. He tilted his head to see a massive gap between them—a veritable “Great Wall” of space.

The world fell silent. Click. The lights went out.

Before Su Wen could think about how to fix the current situation, he drifted into a groggy sleep. In the middle of the night, he was stirred awake by someone holding him tightly. A voice was whispering incessantly in his ear.

After a long while, he heard it clearly:

“Are you going to break up with me?”