What Remains at the End of Regret - Chapter 23

Edmund resisted the sudden urge to grip her slender neck, delicate enough to break with a single hand. Instead, he raised Vivian Mabel’s chin slowly with his steady fingers.

“Think carefully, Vivian.”

Tears finally spilled from her eyes, which held the deep, unreadable color of a forest. Once the first tear fell, the rest followed without stopping, falling quickly beneath her red, swollen eyes.

“I am really sorry. I will leave. I just need to go back like this and…”

“Are you trying to run away?”

“What?”

“That is what you are good at, isn’t it?”

Edmund let go of her chin and turned to look out the window. The heavy rain that had been falling, the same rain that had brought her to this place, had already stopped. He no longer had any reason to keep her here.

He turned back to her and spoke with no hesitation.

“Leave.”

The words she had been waiting for.

Vivian did not stop to think. She rushed out of the guesthouse.

The wet sand grabbed at her feet like a trap. She stumbled and fell, catching herself before she could cry. She bit down on her lip hard.

Do not cry.

Scraped and stinging from the fall, she stood up and started running again. Her breathing became heavy, but she did not stop. It did not hurt. It just felt sad.

His mercy had caught her off guard.

The Duke had not questioned her or humiliated her. He had simply let her go. For someone like Vivian, who had always doubted him, it was a strange kindness she could not understand.

Had he somehow understood her situation? Had he chosen to show sympathy instead of judgment?

Before she realized it, she was back in front of the sea. She looked down at the blue waves quietly reaching for her feet.

How am I supposed to go back?

The Tannic Sea, touched by sunlight once again, simply moved in soft, gentle waves. It gave no answer.

She felt miserable. Foolish.

She could not bring herself to dive back into the cold water and swim all that distance again.

There was only one way left.

When she turned her head, she saw the stone stairs beside the guesthouse. They led up along the cliff. She was sure they connected to the gate she had once tried to peek through as a child. It was the safest way out.

But she could not do it. She could not climb the steps that led directly to the mansion. She was not that shameless.

Vivian shook her head in defeat.

She would return the same way she came.

That was the only answer she could accept. After everything that had just happened between her and the Duke, she could not bring herself to walk through his door. Not now.

She took a deep breath and stepped into the sea.

It would be a long time before she swam again. With that thought, and the heaviness in her chest, Vivian began to move through the water once more.

＊＊＊

Edmund remained in the guesthouse, watching the space she had just left. He quietly went over the events in his mind.

She was so full of fear, yet her actions were reckless. She had spied on his space, entered it without permission, and even swam through the sea to get here. Her behavior was impulsive, but her determination was something he had to acknowledge.

He leaned back into the sofa. The spot behind him, where Vivian had sat curled up with her bare back exposed, was still damp. The water had soaked into the floorboards and left dark stains.

He tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling. His eyes were calm and unreadable.

At first, he had been surprised. Her sudden appearance and ridiculous behavior had made him laugh, even if only for a moment. But that was all.

Now, he focused on the faint sound of waves in the distance. The sea was quiet again, brushing softly against the shore beyond the guesthouse.

The next time he saw her, she was no longer a girl. She had become a woman, fully grown.

When she ran away from him, clearly afraid, Edmund thought he might have felt annoyed by the sight of her back.

So when he noticed the guilt she carried, he decided to use it without hesitation.

As he expected, her reaction was satisfying enough to amuse him.

Every time they met, she looked nervous and out of place. That alone confirmed that the card he held had power over her.

It worked. It bound her.

Maybe she was too naive, or maybe she was just foolish. Either way, her mind was easy to read.

Even today, Vivian Mabel, that foolish girl, had handed him another leash to keep her from walking away.

An unexpected intrusion, yes, but he had no reason to be harsh about it.

She had given him enough in return.

As the summer heat brightened again through the windows, Edmund stood up.

Now he understood the messy feelings he had every time he saw her.

A twisted desire to break her.

It was strange, but real.

Vivian Mabel would continue to provide enough interest and entertainment.

She had proven that much by crossing the sea and coming to him.

Even for a noblewoman of lower status, it was shameful to act like that.

She was just one of many meaningless guests in this quiet countryside summer.

Nothing more.

At least, until summer ended, she would stay in her place, bound by the role he had set for her.

That was the simple conclusion he reached.

By the time he finished thinking, she had already vanished from his sight.

Edmund buttoned his shirt neatly at the collar and turned to walk back to the main estate.

The sun was blazing. The sea sparkled blue, so bright it almost hurt the eyes.

It was a cruel and romantic scene.

＊＊＊

Vivian finally came out of the water, gasping for breath.

Her body was too weak to keep standing, so she dropped to her knees and pressed both arms into the sand to hold herself up.

She was filled with shame and regret.

Why did she make such a fool of herself in front of the Duke again?

She did not want to see him anymore.

Nothing ever went the way she wanted when he was around.

Coughing and shivering, Vivian wrapped her arms around her soaked body.

The cold from the rain and the sea had sunk deep into her skin.

She had been in the water far too long.

The sun had already warmed the sand, but her body was cold as ice.

Tears streamed down her face.

The sadness overwhelmed her, and she broke into a full sob.

She hated him.

She hated the Duke.

She hated everything he said to humiliate her.

She hated how small and worthless she felt next to someone of such high status.

In front of the noble and graceful Duke of Lockberg, she always stumbled and made herself look foolish.

The shawl she had left behind was now soaked through.

There was no way to use it anymore.

Her body began to tremble.

Vivian wiped her tear-stained face and forced herself to stand.

She turned toward the forest.

She had to get back.

Back to the warm and quiet estate.

She walked without stopping, still crying.

Even though she tried again and again to calm her heart, the tears would not stop.

Deep in the forest, she finally gave in and cried loudly like a child.

“Oh, heavens. What happened to you?”

Betty cried out in shock as she ran to her.

Vivian looked like a soaking wet mouse, completely exhausted.

Just as Betty had feared, the young lady had been caught in the rain.

Vivian’s skin was icy cold.

Betty wasted no time. She helped Vivian back to her room, boiled water until it was nearly steaming, and pushed her gently into the bathtub.

Only then did Vivian’s body, chilled from rain and seawater, begin to find warmth again.

In the end, Vivian fell into a high fever that held her captive for ten full days.

It was the first time she had been this sick since the summer when she was twelve.

What she thought was only a mild cold turned out to be much worse. The illness hit her hard, wearing her down day after day.

At first, the viscount and his wife scolded her for recklessly throwing herself into the sea. But as the fever continued and her condition worsened, they could no longer hide their concern.

It was a harsh and lingering summer illness.

Vivian lay in bed, unable to open her eyes, barely able to move. She prayed again and again.

Please, let this summer be over.

Once the Duke returned to the capital and the days began to shorten, everything would go back to the way it was.

The peaceful life she had known.

The beautiful calm of Faubert.

She prayed for those days to return.

She prayed until every last trace of the fever was gone from her body.

Please, she whispered in her heart.

Let this summer come to an end.

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