Weakness Trap - Chapter 55

Time seemed to stand still.

Through bleary eyes, Yu Lingxue could only make out the gloomy furrow between Yu Qingluan’s brows and her darkened expression.

A storm colder than any before now enveloped Yu Qingluan, and even as she advanced slowly, she carried an undeniable aura of authority.

Yet Yu Lingxue couldn’t bring herself to retreat, unwilling to distance herself from Yu Qingluan even by a single step.

And so, she got what she deserved punishment in the form of a sharp, stinging slap across her left cheek.

The force of the blow turned her head, and a red, swollen mark bloomed where palm met skin.

Pain flooded Yu Lingxue’s mind moments later, riding on each shaky breath.

Tears welled in her wide, disbelieving eyes, spilling over despite her efforts.

As those tears caught Yu Qingluan’s gaze, her own stinging palm clenched briefly, aching with an indescribable sorrow.

She withdrew her hand, as if to hide its redness or take back the slap, and stuffed it into her pocket.

Her gaze dropped, unable or unwilling to meet Yu Lingxue’s eyes.

Even Zeng Lan, standing nearby, was stunned by Yu Qingluan’s harshness.

For a moment, the air itself froze. No one spoke, no one moved; even the wind seemed to hold its breath.

After a few shaky breaths, Yu Lingxue steadied herself, lifting her hand from her cheek to look at Yu Qingluan.

The redder and more swollen her eyes grew, the more tears she shed, the deeper the ache in Yu Qingluan’s chest became so intense it nearly brought her to tears as well.

But Yu Qingluan gritted her teeth and held them back.

“Did you enjoy deceiving me?” she forced out through trembling lips.

“I didn’t mean to ” Yu Lingxue lowered her hand.

It was just a slap. She could endure it.

The sting on her face had already faded, and in a strange way, the blow had eased some of the tension in her heart.

She wanted Yu Qingluan to release all her pent up resentment; perhaps this slap was only the beginning.

“I’m sorry, Qingluan. You said you didn’t want rumors spreading, that you didn’t want to see me, That’s why I resorted to this.”

Afraid of further irritating Yu Qingluan, Yu Lingxue took a small step back.

“I, I just wanted to see you. I didn’t intend to impose.” Her eyes searched Yu Qingluan’s face, hoping for a sign of softening.

But things don’t always go as one hopes.

Yu Qingluan dug her nails into her own arm, resisting the urge to strike again. Yet the look she gave Yu Lingxue was filled with a fury and pain Yu Lingxue couldn’t comprehend.

As if Yu Lingxue had once again betrayed her in some unspeakable way.

That single glance was enough to plunge Yu Lingxue into deep self-doubt, forcing her to question every action she’d taken in recent days.

She lowered her head, afraid that Yu Qingluan’s gaze might pierce deeper, dragging her into an abyss.

“I don’t want to see you.” Yu Qingluan realized her own state was unraveling.

She trembled, fighting back tears even as her eyes reddened.

Drawing a sharp breath, she took several steps back and repeated, this time with more conviction:

“I don’t want to see you! Can’t you just leave me alone? You and I are in the past! It doesn’t matter if you’re divorced now, or how high you’ve climbed.”

“We have nothing to do with each other. Nothing at all! And I don’t want any new connection. I’m fine now I’m happy with my life as it is. I don’t need to start over with you. I don’t need you disrupting my peace.”

“But I, I haven’t been disrupting you,” Yu Lingxue’s heart ached at Yu Qingluan’s words.

“You’re not disturbing me? You keep coming to me, harassing me under different identities isn’t that a disturbance?”

Yu Qingluan spoke with agitation, taking two steps forward as if she wanted to slap Yu Lingxue again.

But Yu Lingxue froze. She only wanted to be good to Yu Qingluan, only couldn’t bear to see the bloodshot redness in her eyes from lack of rest, the deep, dark circles beneath them. She only wanted to ensure, from the shadows, that Yu Qingluan was doing well now, not wanting anyone or anything to interfere with her career.

Was this considered a disturbance?

These words hurt more than the slap earlier.

They pierced deeply into Yu Lingxue’s heart, carving out a terrifying hole. Blood seemed to surge endlessly, filling her entire chest, making the ache pervasive, drowning her reason and welling up in her eyes.

“I didn’t know, I didn’t know. I’m sorry.” Yu Lingxue lowered her head, unwilling even to cry in front of Yu Qingluan.

Tears still fell onto the damp ground, vanishing instantly, merging into the chilly dampness of autumn.

As if they had fallen on someone’s heart. Yu Qingluan averted her gaze, her body still tense.

“I’ll leave now. I’m sorry.” Clutching her chest, gripping her collar, Yu Lingxue hurriedly fled.

Yu Qingluan stood where she was, her breathing rapid and trembling.

The hand she had repeatedly restrained from striking bore red marks on her palm, her arm, all signs of her restraint.

Or perhaps, reluctance.

Yu Qingluan despised this reluctance, wishing she could slap herself just as hard.

Zeng Lan patted her back and guided her into the shop.

” So annoying.” Yu Qingluan buried her face in her arms, her breathing still labored.

Even so, tears continued to fall.

She refused to show this vulnerability in front of Yu Lingxue.

“It is annoying. How many times have we told her to stop coming, to stop looking for you? This is harassment. Honestly, we need to find a way to make her leave for good, so she won’t bother you again.”

Zeng Lan couldn’t read minds and didn’t understand what Yu Qingluan meant by that one sentence.

Yu Qingluan only shook her head, then nodded. “Anyway, I won’t be in Hong Kong next month.”

After all the mental preparation she had done for so long, after all the growth she had undergone over these many days.

In the end, she could still only think of running away, still unable to face and resolve this issue head-on.

Yu Qingluan coaxed Zeng Lan to leave, then closed the shop door, staying alone inside, staring blankly at the darkening sky.

She stared for a long time, thinking of many things.

Yu Qingluan remembered the winters in Hong Kong. She recalled the darkest moments of her life.

Learning of Yu Lingxue’s engagement, being slandered as relying on a partner for her career, or worse, a sugar daddy.

Both events happened in Hong Kong.

She should have hated this place to the bone. Yet, two years later, she still chose it as the center of her career.

Was she that pathetic?

Did she deserve to be entangled by Yu Lingxue, deserve to be thrown back into an emotional storm because of this person, sinking into a bitter abyss, tossed up and down, finding bitterness everywhere she went?

Yu Qingluan took out the calming incense balm Yu Lingxue had given her.

She should have realized it sooner.

Who else but Yu Lingxue could so keenly detect her physical discomfort and concoct such an effective remedy?

Was she allowing herself to sink into this, or had she truly been momentarily foolish, not considering this possibility?

Yu Qingluan clenched the porcelain bottle, raised her hand, gritted her teeth, and smashed it with force.

Just when she had finally begun to consider asking for contact information.

Just when she thought she had stepped out of that shadow. Two years had passed perhaps it was time to start a new life.

In the end, the one she had feelings for was still Yu Lingxue.

How pitiful she was.

Yu Lingxue returned home and did not apply any medicine to the place where she had been struck.

Yu Qingluan had not held back that slap was terribly harsh, and Yu Lingxue’s face was still flushed red.

Yet, Yu Lingxue wasn’t in pain because of the slap.

Rather, if hitting her a few times could ease Yu Qingluan’s anger, she would gladly accept it.

Physical pain was nothing compared to the torment in her heart.

It was Yu Qingluan’s words that truly hurt Yu Lingxue.

She was in so much pain that even when Yu Yueheng hovered nearby, hesitating to speak for the third time, Yu Lingxue couldn’t bring herself to look at her or utter a single word.

It was only when Yu Yueheng finally embraced her, ending their week-long cold war, that Yu Lingxue finally broke down, sobbing uncontrollably in her mother’s arms.

“She said I was harassing her, but I just I just couldn’t bear to let go. I just liked her, just wanted to be near her, even if it was only to watch from afar. I, I didn’t even speak to her much.”

As long as Yu Qingluan didn’t recognize her, couldn’t they have continued like this?

How Yu Lingxue wished she could keep repeating this lie to Yu Qingluan forever.

But in the end, she couldn’t hide it.

“To her, the moment she realized it was you, everything that came before must have truly felt like harassment,” Yu Yueheng explained, trying to help her understand Yu Qingluan’s perspective.

After staring blankly at her mother for a moment, Yu Lingxue only cried even harder.

“She, she hates me,” Yu Lingxue’s emotions spiraled out of control, her words becoming incoherent.

She repeated that one phrase over and over.

How agonizing.

To be hated by the one you love and not just a little.

She couldn’t even get close. Even watching from a distance would get her driven away.

Yu Lingxue had repeated the word “regret” too many times to count.

She wanted to travel back in time, to find a crack in the ground to hide in, to smash her head against the wall and start over.

But none of that was possible.

She had struggled so hard just to learn that Yu Qingluan was still alive.

If she left now, she would never have another chance to reconcile with Yu Qingluan.

Moreover, Yu Lingxue didn’t want Yu Qingluan to feel guilty because of her.

“Ah.” Yu Yueheng sighed as she stroked Yu Lingxue’s hair.

If this was nothing but a cursed fate, could she let it go?

But years had passed, and Yu Lingxue hadn’t let go in the slightest. Instead, in the days of loss, she grew more obsessive by the day, treating Yu Qingluan as her only hope for survival.

Because of this, Yu Yueheng didn’t dare say much to dissuade her, afraid of pushing Yu Lingxue over the edge, causing her to argue or even contemplate something drastic.

Why did the child she had fought to bring back from death’s door have to suffer such a cruel fate?

When she had pleaded with the Buddha for medical skills, had she lost her chance at worldly ties in this life?

And that time she stumbled and crawled to beg the Buddha for a connection had she incurred divine displeasure, bringing endless torment upon her heart?

“If she hates you, will you give up?” Yu Yueheng asked as she wiped Yu Lingxue’s tears, wishing she could just pull her away.

“How could I,” Yu Lingxue sobbed, taking the tissue to dry her eyes. “I, I’m just so sad. I still like her so, so much. I want her to be happy, I want to give her the best, and I want to be with her with her.”

She spoke the last sentence softly, as if even she didn’t believe reconciliation was possible in this lifetime.

“But have you considered that if she hates you, then staying away might be what’s best for her?” Yu Yueheng gently patted her daughter’s back.

Yu Lingxue shook her head. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t tried before.

Besides, hadn’t she spent the past two years thinking Yu Qingluan was gone, believing they were worlds apart?

“I can’t do it.” She had waited so long for her return.

Even life and death separation hadn’t shattered her hope she had endured it. What did it matter if Yu Qingluan hated her now?

“I can’t do it. Call me selfish.” Yu Lingxue wiped away her tears and cast off her sorrow.

“That old man named something Luo Lang have you looked into him? Can we move against him?” Yes, call her selfish.

This time, she wouldn’t use the excuse of acting for Yu Qingluan’s sake.

She was doing this for herself.

She would never let go again.