Transmigrated as the Villain and Driven Crazy by the Vengeful Male Lead - Chapter 58

Chapter 58: Evasion — Merely a Game of Enchantment.

On the first day of the lunar new year, the entire town lingered in bed amidst the morning light—except for Tao Xuanxuan.

She hadn’t slept. The “Heart-Reversing Poison” (Nixin Poison) had insisted on making a scene during the transition between the old year and the new, striking so suddenly that she was left with no options.

Every time He Zixu’s poison flared up, she attempted to find the root cause, yet every confrontation with the toxin ended in failure. She could only chase after it like an ignorant farmer mending a fold after the sheep were gone—pinning a needle wherever it pained, stopping the blood wherever it flowed.

Facing the dying He Zixu on the sickbed, she would sometimes detach herself, like a cold bystander, imagining her childhood playmate had long since become a monster full of holes, or perhaps just a tattered beggar’s cloak covered in patches, waiting for the day a breeze would blow him into dust.

While waiting for him to wake, she forced her mind to wander. For instance, she would think about what might have happened if she hadn’t agreed to go to the back mountains with him that year, or if she hadn’t been so afraid of dogs, or if her rebellion against her father hadn’t been so violent—if she hadn’t burned the medical books or destroyed the pharmacy…

If he had never given her that Tangram set.

She would also use him on the bed as a metaphor; for example, last night he had been covered in her medical needles from head to toe, dense and shimmering—like a little silver hedgehog, quite beautiful.

But this little silver hedgehog had no offensive capabilities. When other hedgehogs bristled, they inspired caution or fear; only his quills made one feel helpless and sad.

He Zixu had not yet awakened.

Tao Xuanxuan stood up and went to the window for air. Someone was standing outside.

Standing in the first light rain of the New Year.

It rarely rained in Pingluan Town. Last night, the sky had been scrubbed by charcoal and sulfur, choked by haze all night, so this morning it began to drizzle pathetically. Lv Shuyao did not hold an umbrella. His purple robes were stained dark where the water soaked into his shoulders, carrying a sorrow that seemed impossible to dissolve.

Tao Xuanxuan turned to confirm that He Zixu was still asleep, then opened the door and walked out.

He seemed to be deep in thought, looking up only after a moment to find her there. He greeted her peacefully: “Good morning, Miss Cong.”

Then he saw her face and froze: “…Have you been crying?”

Tao Xuanxuan touched her eyes. “Why would I cry?”

“Your eyes are very red…”

Tao Xuanxuan’s expression was as flat as a mirror. “I didn’t sleep last night.”

Lv Shuyao hadn’t slept either, but compared to his own tangled thoughts, the situation on Tao Xuanxuan’s end was clearly more critical. He suppressed his inner anxiety and asked carefully, “Young Master He…”

“He hasn’t woken up yet,” Tao Xuanxuan said. “I won’t be able to get away for the next two days. Once he wakes up, we’ll talk about the Second Young Master’s legs.”

“Alright,” Lv Shuyao agreed, then added, “Wait, there’s something I want to discuss with you.”

“What else?”

Lv Shuyao tried not to sound too abrupt. “When A-Tong returns, I… I want to borrow him for a few days to look after the Second Young Master.”

Tao Xuanxuan: “? What do you mean? Are you leaving?”

“No,” he waved his hands hurriedly. “I’m not leaving. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t leave before the mission is finished.”

He let the word “mission” slip out in a moment of distraction, but Tao Xuanxuan didn’t notice. “Then why do you need A-Tong? Can’t you take care of him yourself?”

…Exactly.

She hit the nail on the head.

He couldn’t take care of Su Cheyue right now.

Last night’s events were too sudden, too bizarre, and too stimulating. He had no idea how to face him now.

When Su Cheyue held him last night, his heart had been struck by another electric current—heavy and numbing. When he put him back on the bed, he had practically fled the room.

He thought the excessive physical reaction was the result of the medicine Gu; he could help Su Cheyue solve his problem, but no one could help him solve his.

So he had escaped back to his own room, hidden in bed, and grit his teeth to endure it for a while.

It was no use. The place that symbolized desire was aching. It was agonizing.

He remained silent, covering his eyes with his hand, and in a state of self-abandonment, he gripped himself.

Yet, that wasn’t the most shameful or terrifying part.

In the darkness of the rhythm, his mind wasn’t blank. Or rather, it was so blank that only one image, one sob, and one sensation remained.

The image of Su Cheyue with his eyes covered and lips slightly parted; the lingering sound of the soft moans Su Cheyue couldn’t help but let out; the stickiness Su Cheyue eventually left in his palm…

And that kiss that never happened.

He lingered among these phantoms, gradually feeling as though he were drowning in a tide.

Until his pupils lost focus again, and his palm grew wet once more.

Mingling with the scent Su Cheyue had left behind.

He was so exhausted he could barely breathe. Shock and shame overwhelmed him. In the moment of release, he thought of two people: Su Cheyue and Lv Yizhou.

The former brought him pleasure; the latter brought him loathing.

On this night, these two emotions actually intertwined. He enjoyed himself amidst rejection, sank into indulgence amidst shame, and reached the peak of pleasure amidst hatred.

He lost all strength and curled up on the bed: “…I’m a fucking…”

How was he any different from Lv Yizhou?

— Yao-yao, don’t you know? Sexual orientation is actually innate. Perhaps it’s even hereditary. It can’t be fought, and it can’t be changed.

At that time, he had just started junior high school. Half-understanding, he had asked back with a defiant, youthful face: “Then why didn’t you say so earlier?”

Lv Yizhou said: “Perhaps until you meet that person, you won’t discover it your entire life.”

The young Lv Shuyao replied: “I don’t understand.”

“Orientation is like a safe with a fingerprint lock,” Lv Yizhou gave him an analogy. “There might be only one person in the world who can help you open it. Before that, you never know what’s inside your safe. So you can only follow the people around you who have already opened theirs, and try to deduce your own answer from the answers in their boxes.”

He had touched the top of his head guiltily: “Unfortunately, my key arrived too late.”

He had already followed the world and chosen the wrong answer, yet he was no longer willing to be responsible for it.

Lv Shuyao had always firmly believed this was just an excuse his father made for his own infidelity.

At that moment, he swore he would never become like Lv Yizhou. If no one could open his safe, then he would throw it away.

Last night was just a game of enchantment, like a flare-up of poison—very painful, very unforgettable, but it would eventually be cured.

“A-Tong can’t be spared,” Tao Xuanxuan interrupted his messy thoughts.

Lv Shuyao said, “My meaning is, I can switch with A-Tong. I will take care of the Young Master.”

In any case, in the original book, after New Year’s Eve, Tao Xuanxuan did avoid Su Cheyue for a period (except for necessary medical treatments). According to the original plot, it was precisely because Tao Xuanxuan sent A-Tong to care for him that their relationship progressed further.

“…” Tao Xuanxuan’s expression seemed to say, Are you looking for trouble?

Lv Shuyao really didn’t know how to explain it. He was extremely helpless, his head hanging low, his heart in disarray, and his steps chaotic. He covered his beautiful puppy-dog eyes and paced back and forth on the spot.

“I don’t know what to do. This is the only way I can think of. The thought of him waking up and looking at me makes me panic. This is going to be the death of me…”

“It’s all Lv Yizhou’s fault for telling me that nonsense. I really want to transmigrate back and pick a fight with him. Seriously, fine if he didn’t want me, but to screw me over like this… is there anyone in the world as miserable as me?”

Tao Xuanxuan knit her brows, watching him go mad.

A cough came from the room.

Tao Xuanxuan turned back instantly. He Zixu had awakened. She helped him up and poured a cup of warm tea she had prepared earlier, instructing, “Drink slowly.”

He Zixu didn’t drink. He looked at her and smiled, his mind perfectly clear. “I knew it. Only at times like this is Zhouzhou slightly less fierce.”

He was like an awakened Sleeping Beauty—his features thin, his smile resembling autumn sycamore leaves swaying gently.

“I’m so tired from sleeping,” he said. “I dreamed a beast was biting me, leaving me covered in blood. I ran and ran, escaped into a cave, and found it was a hedgehog’s burrow. Little hedgehogs surrounded me. I begged them to let me hide; the monster’s bites hurt too much.”

Tao Xuanxuan stared at the teacup in his hand.

“They said, ‘You can hide, but you must be like us. You have to grow quills all over your body so it won’t find you for a while.’ I felt like I had found a lifeline and agreed immediately. They worked through the night to make me a layer of armor. Then I woke up…”

He pointed with difficulty to his own body: “…And it became like this.”

Tao Xuanxuan rolled her eyes at him.

He Zixu continued: “Thank you, little hedgehog.”

Tao Xuanxuan froze and turned her face away.

He Zixu saw Lv Shuyao standing at the door and asked, “Is Master Lv here to see me?”

Lv Shuyao couldn’t bear it: “Yes.”

“Every time I fall unconscious, a crowd of people surrounds my door. This is actually very unlucky,” He Zixu said seriously. “It makes it look like you’ve already held many funerals for me.”

“Shut up.”

“I would like to volunteer to care for the Young Master,” Lv Shuyao spoke up. “Although I don’t understand medicine, I have a lot of experience looking after people. The Second Young Master used to be very thin, but now…”

Now he seemed to have been raised well by him.

He Zixu smiled and said, “I know. Master Lv is a very good and gentle person. The Second Young Master said—”

Lv Shuyao’s heart leaped. “What did he say?”

“Nothing.” He Zixu thought for a moment, then shook his head.

The Second Young Master hadn’t actually said anything. He was just so bored while ill that he watched and guessed for himself.

He said: “Master Lv is very good, but I don’t want you to watch over me. The way you guarded me last time was like Zhouzhou guarding her abacus and ledgers.”

Tao Xuanxuan stood up abruptly and left again.

Lv Shuyao let out a hollow laugh: “…Do you want to refuse me, or do you want to drive her away?”

“Two birds with one stone.” He tilted his head successfully. “Don’t worry, I don’t have the strength to kill myself right now.” He gazed at Tao Xuanxuan in the courtyard. “I’m really tired, every single time. Honestly, I could just not wake up. But every time I see the little hedgehog waiting for me in the cave, so close… I can’t bear to leave.”

Lv Shuyao sighed. He was just an outsider, a reader. It wasn’t his place to judge what the feelings between Tao Xuanxuan and He Zixu were, or how they differed from her later feelings for Su Cheyue.

He just felt that everyone was pitiable, yet everyone was resilient.

Lv Shuyao suddenly bowed to him. He Zixu was startled: “What is the meaning of this?”

“I beg of you, please help me.”