To the Man Destined to Kill Me - Chapter 120

“No… ah?”

“Yes. It’s me.”

As Noah lit the orb of light, the area around them brightened. Through the flickering light, she saw Noah’s sad eyes.

Scarlett couldn’t look away from him—the deep violet in his eyes and the warmth and longing in his gaze.

It had only been a few weeks since they had poured out hatred toward each other. Scarlett remembered what Noah had said to her that night:

“You’re truly horrible.”

“You should have died back then.”

And Noah remembered those words just as clearly.

He had wanted to tear his own mouth apart for saying such things.

Just six years ago, he would never have imagined saying something like that. The fact that he could now hurl such cruel words so casually made him feel like he had lost his mind.

And yet, whenever Scarlett stood before him, he lost control of himself. He was like a wild beast, moving by instinct, starved and untamed.

Can I… can I undo it all?

Noah’s dry lips trembled slightly.

Could he ever be forgiven for what he said? Maybe that hope was just selfishness on his part.

Forgiveness? He’d be lucky not to get slapped. He knew he couldn’t complain if Scarlett never wanted to see him again. His words had been harsh enough to regret the moment they left his mouth.

“Let go.”

Sure enough, her voice was cold. Noah carefully loosened his grip.

Scarlett looked at him, slightly confused by how subdued he seemed.

He wasn’t glaring at her like he wanted to kill her, nor did he look overwhelmed by madness. The man standing in front of her now…

“Did you come to check if I’m dead or alive?”

“No, no. That’s not it.”

“Then did you come because you wanted to kill me?”

“No. I’d never do that.”

“You said I should’ve died. That I was so horrible you wished I were dead.”

Noah bit his lip, his head dropping in shame. Scarlett didn’t stop—her voice was angry and sharp.

“Then go ahead. Kill me. If you want me dead so badly, do it with your own hands.”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I never should’ve said that.”

“Why not? Unlike you, I do want to kill you. I’m the one who exposed the truth about your mother and shook your position in Natalia. Because of that, I heard Victor Lebedev entered Wifland in secret. Isn’t that right?”

Scarlett wanted to hurt him, even if it meant lying. In truth, it had been Scott and Aaron who revealed the truth about Noah’s mother. As much as she hated Noah, she didn’t truly want to kill him.

Still, she wanted to return the pain she felt—every last bit of it.

If she didn’t, her anger and frustration would eat her alive… And even now, seeing him again made her chest tighten in a way that made her feel like a fool.

No, no. Her love had been wasted—so she had to hurt him too.

A beautiful goodbye? How could anything about this be beautiful?

She knew she wasn’t someone who could walk away gracefully.

She got angry when she was upset, and she cried when she was sad. She couldn’t just stand by and watch their love fall apart.

If something had to break, she’d rather be the one to break it—to take out her pain on what was already shattered.

“Are you okay?”

“Did you come hoping I’m okay? Or hoping I’m not? What’s your reason for being here?”

“…Because I missed you. I missed you so much.”

Scarlett clamped her mouth shut mid-sentence.

She wanted to yell at him for sneaking into her house again, but her heart pounded when he said he came because he missed her. She couldn’t say a word.

If she opened her mouth, her feelings would spill out.

Even after all the pain, seeing Noah face-to-face reminded her—just like before, she felt love tangled with hatred. She was reliving that contradiction.

You idiot.

She knew why Noah had said those things.

He must have found out about her and Wilhelm, and said it all out of betrayal and rage.

But knowing that didn’t stop his words from cutting her like a knife, exposing raw, bleeding wounds.

“Did you get close to Isaac because you missed me?”

“…”

Noah’s shoulders flinched.

“Do you want to destroy my family?”

“…”

Noah wanted to scream his own questions back at her. Why had things become so tangled?

Teddy was his son—so how could he now go after the rest of the White family?

Scarlett was still alive. How could he crush the White brothers like he’d once planned? No, no. If only they hadn’t killed his mother, none of this would be happening.

Noah bit his lip hard, filled with pain.

“It was you, wasn’t it? The one who did that to Scott—it was you. Just like when you framed Wilhelm as a thief. You set it up again, didn’t you?”

“No. It wasn’t me.”

Noah’s voice was thick with emotion. Scarlett’s face twisted at the sound of it.

I’m the one who wants to cry, so why are you the one about to cry?

She glared at him. Right now, he looked just like the Noah from six years ago—the same tormented expression, the same helpless love in his eyes.

Don’t look at me like that.

It confused her.

She felt something rising in her throat. Was it longing? Pity? Even hatred for him came mixed with tenderness. Every emotion blurred together.

“To me…”

Noah began slowly. Just the thought of saying that Teddy was his son made his heart swell and tremble.

He was their son—his and hers. Born between him and the woman he once thought was as unreachable as a god.

“Even if it’s late…”

He wanted to ask if she had ever considered telling him about Teddy.

But he knew—if he said it out loud, she’d run from him forever.

He understood why she kept Teddy hidden. He’d figured it out from what Isaac had told him.

So instead, he said what he’d always wanted to say.

“…Come back to me, Scarlett.”

If you just come to me, I’ll bury all my hatred and resentment toward the White family.

I don’t know if I can, but I’ll try—with only love in my heart, I’ll live just for you.

Noah whispered again, desperately.

“Let’s go back. To the way things were. Okay?”

Scarlett’s eyes shook violently. After how they last parted, she should’ve slapped him without hesitation. But his words made her waver.

Noah gently rested his forehead on her shoulder. He looked so tired. As his skin touched hers, Scarlett tensed up.

They were close enough to smell each other’s scent. It was the scent they both had longed for. And not just that—the warmth and breath of the other was clear on their skin.

Scarlett’s face twisted subtly. It felt unreal, like a dream. Overwhelming guilt wrapped around her, along with the impulse to hold him close.

She wanted to raise her arms and embrace this sorrowful man who leaned on her so heavily. She wanted to kiss him and say that she still loved him.

We’re like two lines that’ll never meet. Stay focused.

She didn’t believe Scott had killed Julia Ashford. But Noah was convinced he did.

Just as Noah once tried to kill her out of hatred, now the name “White” was linked to Julia’s death—and they were once again trapped in love and hate.

“Scarlett.”

Noah said her name. The orb hanging in the air shone brightly, but his face was buried against her, his expression hidden. His voice trembled like a sob.

“Don’t get engaged.”

How did we end up like this, Scarlett? Huh? How did it all go so wrong?

“…”

Where did it go wrong? Was it doomed from the start?

No—it’s all your fault, Scarlett. If you hadn’t rejected me six years ago, I wouldn’t have wanted you so badly.

Once I tasted your love, I couldn’t let go. I couldn’t stop blaming you.

I have to have you. I need to make you mine. I won’t let anyone else have you.

“Don’t go through with the engagement. Please.”

Please don’t force me to destroy you. Just stay by my side.

I know what you’re afraid of. But please, be brave—for me. Choose me.

If you do, I’ll give everything else up. The betrayal, the revenge—I’ll throw it all away. So please… don’t let me go.

“…”

Cruelly, Scarlett said nothing.

Noah’s face grew dim, and his arms tightened around her. He took a shaky breath.

“Listen closely.”

Scarlett looked at his thin back leaning against her. Though he had grown taller with age, he was still so thin that his bones showed even through his clothes.

That fragile sight made her squeeze her eyes shut. A hot sigh escaped between her teeth. Her chest ached so much she could barely stand it.

“This is your last warning. Cancel the engagement.”

His voice was hoarse and drawn out. Scarlett thought his voice was trembling.

“If you ignore my warning, I’ll let your imagination decide what happens next.”

He let out a long breath. She could feel the heat of it on her chest. A chill ran down her spine.

“One thing is certain—if you go through with the engagement, I won’t let it go.”

“…”

Noah lifted his head. His eyes, looking at her, were full of sorrow. His faint smile was tinged with helpless affection.

Scarlett barely held herself together. Her hands even felt like they were shaking.

Noah slowly raised a hand. Her eyes followed it.

His hand reached for her lips.

“Ah.”

She gasped without meaning to. Noah gently cupped one of her cheeks and brushed her lower lip with his thumb. Scarlett instinctively held her breath.

Were her lips hot because of the light reflecting on his fingers, or was it the heat of her own breath?

His thick fingers traced the shape of her lips, like he was branding her as his.

His thumb pressed into the center of her lip, slowly exploring its softness. At the same time, his eyes locked onto hers.

Those violet eyes—like a wizard’s spell luring in the moonlight.

Noah slowly leaned in. As his face drew closer, Scarlett couldn’t move.

She snapped out of it the moment their lips touched. As their breath mingled, one thought came to her—Teddy.

Her beloved son, the one she had to protect always would. His safety mattered more than any love she still had for Noah.

“No.”

Scarlett pulled away. Noah, stunned, touched his lips where they had briefly met.

Then, suddenly, he stood, extinguished the orb, and disappeared through the balcony.

Just like that, Noah vanished into the darkness like a mirage of the night.

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