To Sweep Across Like Wildfire - Chapter 40

Chapter 40

Meng Chi didn’t say a word, her gaze fixed intensely on Shen Qingruo.

Shen Qingruo let go of the sash of her dress and said, “If you don’t want to, forget it.”

She had barely turned to walk away when a soft rustle sounded behind her. A pair of slender, strong arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her into a soft embrace. Her back pressed against the other person without a sliver of a gap, and a familiar scent of perfume swirled around her nose.

Meng Chi’s calm voice trembled slightly: “I want to.”

It was late afternoon, and the sun was shifting westward, casting the living room into a state of half-light and half-shadow.

They stood at the boundary of the sunlight. Shen Qingruo’s delicate ears were lit a bright, translucent red, revealing the tiny, fine hairs on the skin. Meng Chi pressed her thin lips together and kissed her there.

Shen Qingruo’s heart skipped a beat, and she instinctively gripped Meng Chi’s hands that were wrapped around her waist.

Hazy light flickered before her eyes, making her feel as if she were trapped in a midsummer dream. How long had it been since she was held like this? This embrace gave her a profound sense of security, as if she didn’t have to think about anything at all—like returning to the ignorant days of middle school.

I really want to go home. This thought suddenly sprouted from the depths of her heart.

Her gaze slid across the old photo frame on the TV cabinet, where the blurred images of the past remained. A bitter emotion bubbled up like carbonation and spilled over unexpectedly. But… she was already home.

It was home, and yet not home. Whether it was day or night, she was always alone.

She had been busy for two days straight, sleeping from the early morning until the afternoon. The moment she woke up, the room was silent. The sunlight wasn’t intense, yet she felt a sudden, crushing sense of being abandoned by the world. But hadn’t she been living alone for many years? She thought she was used to it.

“Sister…”

A young, pleasant female voice whispered in her ear.

Someone had dived into these freezing deep waters, swimming toward her as she sank toward the seabed. They grabbed her wrist without a word and pulled her upward, inch by inch.

She returned to reality, back into the warm, gentle sunlight.

Sensing her distraction, Meng Chi asked softly, “What are you thinking about?”

Shen Qingruo exhaled imperceptibly, hiding the sadness in her eyes. She turned around to wrap her arms around Meng Chi’s neck and teased, “I finally know why you bought so many sofa cushions.” Her eyes were still a bit red, but her tone was playful. “So you wanted to try out the sofa more often.”

Meng Chi knew she loved to talk like this, but her ears still turned red. She was about to protest with a “No,” but upon seeing Shen Qingruo’s eyes, she swallowed the words. She reached out and brushed the corner of the older woman’s eye. “What’s wrong?”

Shen Qingruo’s heart jolted, but her eyes remained smiling. “Is something wrong?”

“I can’t put it into words,” Meng Chi said seriously, “but I feel like you’re unhappy.”

“You’re right, I am unhappy,” Shen Qingruo said naturally. “Why did you buy so many cushions? Do you have too much money to spend? Or do you want me to stay in your debt forever?”

Her eyes weren’t as red anymore, and her expression looked normal. It was as if that moment of sadness had been a mere hallucination, so Meng Chi suppressed her doubts. She wanted to say “You don’t have to pay me back,” but she felt she had said that before and it hadn’t sunk in. Instead, she said, “What’s wrong with owing me?” It wasn’t like she would do anything bad to Shen Qingruo.

Shen Qingruo pressed her hands against Meng Chi’s shoulders and slowly pushed her back onto the sofa. Her alluring eyes tilted up as she looked down from a dominant position. “Do you want to become my biggest creditor?”

Meng Chi felt a slight numbness in her chest, but she maintained a calm face. “Is that not allowed?”

“It is,” Shen Qingruo said. “You can do whatever you want.”

…

More than two hours later, the two were slumped on the sofa resting. The sun had withdrawn its last ray and sunk away, leaving the living room in darkness.

Shen Qingruo felt a bit cold. She shifted her exhausted body to lean into Meng Chi’s arms. “Are you hungry?”

“No.” Meng Chi’s voice wasn’t as “vile” as it had been moments ago. Having regained her composure, she sounded normal. She picked up a piece of clothing from the sofa and draped it over Shen Qingruo. “And you?”

“I’m not hungry either,” Shen Qingruo said.

She stared into space. The bitterness had left her, replaced by a deep, total satiety—like someone who had been starving for a long time and suddenly received a feast. She liked this feeling. That was why she often tried to stay calm around Meng Chi but inevitably ended up drawing closer.

She suddenly wanted a cigarette, but she resisted the urge to reach for the pack. She nuzzled into Meng Chi’s neck and acted spoiled: “Kid, buy me some candy next time.”

“Candy?” Meng Chi was confused by the sudden request.

“I want fruit candy,” Shen Qingruo said. “Even though cigarette taxes are a major source of national revenue, for the sake of my body, my health, and for the next fifty years of building a new socialist China, I’ve decided to stop contributing. Most importantly, a certain kid is picking up bad habits from adults. For the sake of the ‘seedlings of the nation,’ I’ve decided to lead by example and quit. You’re not allowed to think about smoking either.”

Meng Chi was touched by the word “future” (implied in the “not allowed to smoke later”). Her heart softened, and her gaze toward Shen Qingruo turned tender. Because the lights weren’t on, Shen Qingruo couldn’t see her eyes, which was the only reason Meng Chi dared to look at her so boldly.

Meng Chi said calmly, “Smoke if you want to. Don’t worry about me.”

As she said it, she realized she was quite good at acting. She was actually thrilled that Shen Qingruo was quitting for her, yet she insisted on pretending she didn’t care.

Shen Qingruo happened to find her lighter and began fiddling with it, clicking it on and off. The small flame flickered in her pale palm, the warm light making her face look exceptionally beautiful.

“I’ll get your cigarettes,” Meng Chi said.

Shen Qingruo immediately stuffed the lighter under a cushion and buried her face in Meng Chi’s neck, mumbling, “Kid, do you just not want to buy me candy?”

“I’ll buy it,” Meng Chi said immediately. She suppressed the second half of the sentence: I’ll buy you whatever you want. She felt that would expose her feelings too much and feared being teased.

Sometimes she really disliked “adults” like Shen Qingruo who always used age as a weapon, as if being younger made everything she said inherently childish. No other elder called her childish; they all praised her for being mature. It was only Shen Qingruo who teased her.

Shen Qingruo happily kissed Meng Chi’s long neck. “You owe me a bag of fruit candy.” Thinking of those five huge boxes of cushions, she added, “Just one bag. Don’t buy me several boxes, or I’ll get sick of them.”

Meng Chi sounded slightly disappointed as she compromised: “Fine.”

“To repay you for the candy,” Shen Qingruo said while slowly putting her clothes back on, “I’ve decided to cook.”

Meng Chi sounded skeptical. “You can cook?” She had never known Shen Qingruo could cook. Seeing how clean the kitchen was, she assumed it was rarely used.

Shen Qingruo’s hair had fallen loose; she stood up and walked toward the fridge, tying her hair up with a random hair tie. “Do I not look like I can?”

“A little.”

Shen Qingruo laughed and took out ingredients. “I’m not hungry, but we should eat something. Here’s a piece of life experience for your notebook: if you don’t eat when you’re sad, you’ll only get sadder.”

The kitchen wasn’t fully stocked, and many seasonings had expired since she hadn’t cooked in ages. Shen Qingruo ordered some groceries on an app; for the things she couldn’t get there, she sent Meng Chi to the fresh market downstairs.

Meng Chi threw the expired jars into the recycling bin. She also took the empty soda bottles from the afternoon and the ones that had been sitting in the house back to the wonton shop. The owner, with a cigarette dangling from his mouth and a nonchalant look, tossed the bottles into a crate. He fished some change out of a tin box and handed it to Meng Chi. “Your sister overpaid for the wontons this afternoon. Take this back.”

“Since my sister gave it to you, I have no reason to take it back for her,” Meng Chi said. Because Shen Qingruo always called herself “sister,” the word felt naturally comfortable in Meng Chi’s mouth now.

Besides, hadn’t she been calling her “Sister” repeatedly this afternoon? The thought made Meng Chi’s heart race, but she kept a calm face. The rough-mannered owner didn’t notice a thing.

He wasn’t a talkative man, but seeing Meng Chi’s reluctance, he rubbed the back of his head and tossed the money aside. He looked at Meng Chi and said, “You don’t look much like your sister.”

Just as Meng Chi was about to leave, he took the cigarette out of his mouth. “I see you and your sister get along well. Accompany her more when you have time. She’s been eating here alone for several years.” He put the cigarette back. “Most importantly, remind her to return the bottles on time.”

Meng Chi bought the remaining items from the supermarket and went upstairs. As she changed her shoes at the door, she said reflexively, “I’m home.”

She froze for a second. She hadn’t said those words in a long time.

Then, a pleasant, relaxed voice drifted from the kitchen: “Welcome home.”

Meng Chi’s heart skipped a beat. She carried the groceries to the kitchen and saw Shen Qingruo skillfully slicing potatoes into silk. It felt surreal. After a moment, she said, “I’ll help you wash the vegetables.”

Shen Qingruo gave an “Mm.” Seeing Meng Chi still standing at the door, she laughed. “What’s the matter? Regretting the offer? Thinking the adult would say ‘No, no, go play, it’ll be ready soon’? You’re an adult now; you have to learn to help your family. Otherwise, who would dare date you?”

Meng Chi murmured something, as if objecting to that last sentence—as if saying it was none of her business.

She walked over to Shen Qingruo’s side and worked for a while before mentioning casually, “The wonton shop owner said you’ve always been alone all these years…”

“Oh?” Shen Qingruo didn’t stop slicing. “What else did he say?”

Meng Chi repeated what the owner had said.

Shen Qingruo immediately replied, “He’s full of it. I just took Xie Zhen there the other day. He just misses his bottles and wanted you to nag me about returning them.”

“Oh,” Meng Chi said. She had thought she was the first to accompany Shen Qingruo. But it was fine; at least Shen Qingruo hadn’t been eating alone all those years.

A moment later, Shen Qingruo felt a tug on her sleeve. Busy as she was, she patiently turned her head. The “kid” held out a closed fist and said, “Which hand? Guess.”

Shen Qingruo, her hands oily, nudged Meng Chi’s right hand with her chin. Meng Chi opened her palm to reveal a single fruit candy. She must have bought it at the market.

Shen Qingruo smiled. “Looks like I’m lucky. What’s in the other hand?”

The “kid” slowly opened her other hand. It was another fruit candy.

She pressed her lips together, her eyes full of smiles, and said, “They’re both yours.”