To Marry My Little Chestnut - Chapter 38

Separated by only a single wall.

Standing here, Yu Yan could almost feel the excitement and joy Zheng Tingyang must have felt whenever he watched him. It was as if he were seeing another side of his lover. He did not feel that this small space was an invasion of his privacy; voyeurism, after all, was originally a small secret belonging to one person.

In Yu Yan’s upbringing, entering someone else’s secret territory was considered improper. If he had never discovered this wardrobe, his Tingyang would simply be a gentle husband who happened to enjoy keeping him close. But now, he was standing here, experiencing the reality of it.

What exactly was growing in his heart?

The tips of Yu Yan’s ears turned bright red, the color gradually spreading down to his collarbone. He felt his breathing slow down. He wanted to leave, knowing clearly that even lovers should have their own private domains and that he should not simply walk in, but…

He was too curious. He wanted to see what Tingyang would eventually do with his clothes. In his mind’s eye, he saw the man biting the fabric, his face covered by the garment. Yu Yan could vividly imagine the cloth pressed against his nose and mouth, the man’s breath coming in ragged gasps, the fabric rising and falling with the heavy, suppressed pain of his desire.

Zheng Tingyang tilted his chin up, his prominent Adam’s apple bobbing, exuding a masculine hormonal aura so intense that Yu Yan could imagine exactly how hot his body felt even through the glass.

“Little Fish…”

The man clearly could not smell his pheromones, yet Yu Yan recognized his desperation.

Zheng Tingyang pressed one hand against the mirror. His voice, muffled by the clothes, became blurred and hoarse. Yu Yan cautiously pressed his own palm against the glass from his side.

So, Tingyang’s palm is this large.

No wonder he was always complaining that Yu Yan was too thin.

Yu Yan pursed his lips, watching the man lose himself until a thick trail of moisture slowly slid down the mirror. Zheng Tingyang finally removed the clothes and stared at the glass for several seconds, looking dazed.

In that moment of eye contact, Yu Yan’s heart skipped a beat, as if Tingyang could see him through the mirror. This was the first time Yu Yan had seen such an expression on Zheng Tingyang’s face—the deep black eyes held a few seconds of uncharacteristic vulnerability, confusion, and a surging, addictive hunger. It was so intense that even through the glass, Yu Yan felt the fire could consume him at any moment.

Zheng Tingyang turned on the faucet to wash his hands, preparing to change into a new hoodie. It turned out that the bedroom door opening and the shirt falling in the wardrobe earlier were simply because he needed fresh clothes.

“Little Fish?” Zheng Tingyang called his name from the bathroom.

Yu Yan retreated a few steps, hurried to close the wardrobe door, and scrambled out of the bedroom. In his panic, however, he forgot to smooth out the spot on the bed where he had been sitting.

The phone line had remained open, but Xiang Qian, finding that Yu Yan wasn’t responding, eventually hung up in disappointment. Yu Yan nervously returned to the sofa. Zheng Tingyang, having just finished washing his hands, walked out and caught the scent of crème brûlée drifting through the air. “Did the oven timer go off?”

“Yes, it… it went off.” Yu Yan exhaled. Though his voice was low, he spoke clearly.

“Really?” Zheng Tingyang’s lips curled into a smile, his eyes sparkling.

“Mmh.” As if afraid the man wouldn’t believe him, Yu Yan deliberately lingered on the sound.

In truth, his heart was racing. He was flushed from his ears to his collarbone, feeling as though he had committed some great crime. It was only now that he had a delayed realization about his own past behavior of sitting in the bathroom…

Did Tingyang feel the same way he did just now? Watching, peeping, keeping it a small secret that must never be discovered?

He closed his eyes in shame, feeling that he had been entirely too spineless. How could he do such things while carrying a baby? He wished he could just bury his head in a throw pillow and pretend to be a potted Strelitzia plant.

“Why is your face so red?” Zheng Tingyang quickly noticed something was wrong. “Do you feel nauseous? Or just unwell?”

As the temperature of Yu Yan’s face continued to rise, Zheng Tingyang reached out to feel his forehead. Yu Yan’s nose was sharp; he smelled the faint scent of hand soap, but perhaps due to a psychological effect, he thought he caught a lingering hint of… something musky? Even the water droplets between the man’s fingers felt scalding to Yu Yan, as if they were something scandalous, making his face burn even hotter.

“No, I am fine. Really.”

Zheng Tingyang frowned slightly, keenly sensing the change. He cupped Yu Yan’s face, lifting it to search his eyes. Their pupils reflected one another, their breaths intertwining.

“Alright. The crème brûlée should be ready. I will get it for you.”

Yu Yan nodded obediently and let out a long breath. He touched his chest, surprised that his heart was still beating so fast. He really couldn’t handle pressure; he hadn’t expected to be this nervous.

However, he couldn’t help but steal a small smile. It felt like the time back in school when he hadn’t finished his exam due to laziness and lied to the teacher, saying he simply forgot to bring it. Because of his good family background and grades, the teacher would always believe his lies easily.

He hadn’t expected that while Tingyang appeared so shrewd at the company, he was actually quite easy to fool. Thinking of this, Yu Yan wanted to argue with Xiang Qian again. His Tingyang was truly wonderful; he knew how hard the pregnancy was and couldn’t bear to let Yu Yan be unwell, so now he could only resort to secretly smelling his clothes.

This is definitely the mark of a good husband.

The crème brûlée tasted exactly like the one from the hotpot restaurant. Zheng Tingyang had asked the owner’s wife for the recipe and kept the ingredients stocked at home. Yu Yan ate slowly, letting the crunchy layer of caramelized sugar melt in his mouth to reveal the soft center.

Zheng Tingyang pinched his ear gently. “Maybe the floor heating is too high. If those pajamas are too thick, I will find some thinner ones for you in a bit.”

“Mmh.” Yu Yan lowered his head, a faint smile on his lips. He looked exceptionally well-behaved.

Zheng Tingyang truly hoped the child would take after Yu Yan; after all, his Little Fish was so good.

Yu Yan tended to get sleepy after eating. Zheng Tingyang specifically brought the waist support cushion from the bedroom and tucked it behind him. Once he had coaxed the boy into a nap, he began clearing the table. He washed Yu Yan’s dishes by hand and put the rest in the dishwasher.

“Little Fish, let me get you another pillow to prop you up, okay?”

Yu Yan was lying on the sofa. Though his back was supported, his belly felt heavy, causing his body to lean slightly forward. He nodded dizzily. The sunlight in the living room washed over him; his ankles, peeking out from his pajamas, looked as beautiful as white jade, giving him a gentle, divine aura in the light.

“Okay…” Yu Yan agreed in a daze. He had been tossed and turned by the baby during the night, so it was easier for him to sleep during the day. As soon as his head hit something soft, his eyelids refused to stay open.

Zheng Tingyang went to the bedroom to find a new pillow. He had a small storage cabinet there containing new pillows, quilts, and some unopened knitwear. As he prepared to leave the room, his footsteps faltered.

He turned back and saw the slight wrinkles on the edge of the bed where someone had been sitting. He raised an eyebrow.

“Tingyang… my stomach feels so heavy…”

“Coming.” Zheng Tingyang snapped out of it and returned to the living room with the pillow. However, after closing the bedroom door this time, he did not lock it.

Yu Yan rested his head quietly on the man’s lap. Zheng Tingyang stroked his cheek and patted his shoulder to lull him to sleep. The pheromones in the air were potent; Yu Yan could smell the chestnut scent radiating from his own body, a fragrance even sweeter than the crème brûlée he had just eaten, triggered by his intense nerves.

But Yu Yan began to feel glad that his Tingyang couldn’t smell him. That way… he would never discover his little secret. With his ears still red, he buried himself in Zheng Tingyang’s embrace and gradually, his breathing became steady.

A week later, when Zhou Jiangru re-examined Yu Yan, she found his data was excellent. She looked at Yu Yan with some surprise. “Are you two sleeping in separate rooms?”

Yu Yan shook his head. “I have to get up often lately, and he wants to be with me.”

Zhou Jiangru looked at Zheng Tingyang with considerable admiration, thinking he was quite a man. It was often said that pregnant Omegas were as soft as marshmallows. She had smelled Yu Yan’s scent before and knew it was incredibly fragrant. Even though Zheng Tingyang couldn’t smell it, Yu Yan—with his pregnant belly and his “one-pinch-and-he-cries” fragile appearance—was enough to make anyone’s heart soften. She hadn’t expected Zheng Tingyang to have such self-control.

“You can prepare to be hospitalized next month. You are quite thin, so we need to observe you frequently toward the end. If the fetal lung development is sufficient, we will be ready for surgery at any time. The sooner, the better.”

Yu Yan’s lower abdomen was now like a small ball. Sometimes, even a short walk would cause his back to ache miserably. Zheng Tingyang would stand behind him and help support his belly so he could catch his breath and relax for a moment. Seeing how uncomfortable Yu Yan was in his late pregnancy, Zheng Tingyang massaged him every day until he fell into a deep sleep.

Next month would be the final prenatal check-up. Yu Yan stared dazed at the ultrasound photo, holding it even after they got home, unwilling to let go. He found it miraculous: a small life belonging to both of them was growing inside him. Carrying the blood of both him and Tingyang, and tied to their love, it was preparing to enter the world.

Today was New Year’s Eve.

By evening, Zheng Tingyang—knowing Yu Yan wasn’t fond of dumplings—prepared wontons with thinner skins instead. He hid a few coins inside for good luck. Festive programs played on the TV. Orange, the cat from the flower shop, had been brought home that afternoon. Zheng Tingyang had prepared a separate room for the cat, complete with a cat tree and various supplies ordered online. The cat room was set up in just one afternoon.

“Xiang Qian gave this to me. He said it is a new style from their company and he made one specifically for me. Tingyang, this one is yours.”

Xiang Qian’s family was in the garment business, specializing in light luxury. When the factory started production, he had specifically asked the master tailor to hand-make two pieces—were they meant to be New Year “couple outfits”? In exchange, Yu Yan had let him take another Money Tree from the flower shop. The last one had already died under Xiang Qian’s care, which had made Yu Yan feel sad for quite a while.

Plants have lives too, he thought. Being pregnant made him especially sensitive to such things.

Zheng Tingyang unfolded the garment. It was a dark red hoodie with a small chestnut embroidered on the chest—a simple, classic design. However, seeing the style made Zheng Tingyang frown slightly. Garment design and production weren’t his primary focus, but the Xiang family’s partner was one of his own subsidiaries. Selling this style for over ten thousand yuan seemed a bit exaggerated. He began to wonder if Xiang Qian truly lacked the ability to hold the title of “Young President Xiang.”

“Tingyang, look. Why is mine different from yours?” Yu Yan had changed in the bedroom and walked out looking curious and hesitant. “It doesn’t seem like it should be worn this way…”

Zheng Tingyang looked up and immediately decided that Xiang Qian holding the title of “Young President Xiang” was very necessary. Furthermore, this style would likely become a bestseller.

The hoodie on Yu Yan was also a dark red base, but the area from his collarbone to his chest featured a hand-sized lace panel that was transparent. Yu Yan was confused; he turned around in a circle. “Why is so much of the back exposed? Did I put it on backward?”

“It is not backward.” Zheng Tingyang’s Adam’s apple bobbed.

“Oh.” Yu Yan looked down at his front; the exposure wasn’t actually that much. He said with a smile, “It is so strange. I cannot reach it. Can you help me tie it? I want to send a photo to Xiang Qian. He said he wanted to see how it looked.”

The back of the hoodie was almost entirely hollowed out, with silk ribbons replacing buttons to connect the two sides. Starting from Yu Yan’s spine and working down, Zheng Tingyang tied them into several silk bows. They looked as if they were inlaid upon his shoulder blades.

The lighting in the house was soft, like diluted honey poured over Yu Yan’s body. Yu Yan, having no ulterior motives, simply thought the outfit probably wasn’t suitable for wearing outside. He ran to the bathroom mirror, took a photo, and sent it to Xiang Qian.

Great Prophet: [I will definitely be cold if I wear this out!]

Xiang Qian: [Are you okay? This is obviously for wearing at home. Don’t you understand the little pleasures of the wealthy? Where is your Old Zheng? Remember to leash him up!]

Yu Yan stared at Xiang Qian’s message, not quite understanding. Leash what?

He then searched the bag and found a small collar. The long chain looked a bit like the cat leash he had bought for Orange before. Because Orange didn’t like being restrained, it had been left unused.

“Xiang Qian said… this is for you…”

Zheng Tingyang was currently selecting coins for the wontons. He let out a light laugh and knelt down directly by the coffee table, as if he didn’t care what the object was. “Then put it on me.”

“Oh.” Yu Yan patted his knees. Zheng Tingyang leaned over, his head nudging Yu Yan’s pregnant belly. It was a collar-choker chain. As the long chain dangled, Yu Yan finally found a place to secure it—on the plain little embroidered chestnut on Zheng Tingyang’s hoodie.

The hook could be pushed directly through the fabric. Zheng Tingyang sucked in a breath. For some reason, this collar chain was a bit tight. Whenever his Adam’s apple moved, it would feel painfully constricted. If he became too emotional, he might actually suffocate. Furthermore, the hook behind the chestnut had a tiny spike on the inside—so small it was almost invisible—but its position was precisely over a sensitive spot on Zheng Tingyang’s chest. If he moved at all or if the chain swung, he would be pricked painfully.

This ordinary hoodie had suddenly become something entirely different.

By the time Yu Yan realized how strange the situation was, Zheng Tingyang was already staring at the lace trim on his chest with a heavy, lingering gaze.

Yu Yan whispered, “Are we… still making dinner?”

“Of course. I will go wash my hands and then knead the dough.”

Yu Yan saw Zheng Tingyang enter the bathroom and not come out for several minutes. He knew why.

Lately, this happened often. Zheng Tingyang had worked so hard at the docks in his early years; his stamina was incredibly high. Moreover, since their marriage, Zheng Tingyang had never truly been “satisfied.” Yu Yan had never been able to fulfill him; after all, he was pregnant, frail, sensitive, and prone to crying. Whenever he fainted, Zheng Tingyang would be too worried and protective to touch him.

So, regarding the fact that Zheng Tingyang was stealing his clothes, Yu Yan had already learned to pretend he didn’t know. However, when he was certain the man would be in the bathroom for a long time, he would also sneak into the other bedroom and stand in the wardrobe to watch this heart-racing scene.

They both had secrets. Who didn’t?

When a secret is poked through, it feels like colorful fireworks exploding in the mind—a unique pleasure that only the individual can understand.

Yu Yan did not knock. He stepped into the wardrobe once more and began to peek at the secret Tingyang was keeping from him. The man’s throat was constricted by the collar, causing his honey-toned skin to flush. Every time his forearm moved, the hook pricked his body, plunging him into pain. But today, Zheng Tingyang had not stolen his clothes. Instead, he was kneeling before the mirror, head tilted back as if performing a show.

Standing in the dark wardrobe, Yu Yan’s eyes sparkled as he watched Tingyang. Outside the window, fireworks from a neighbor’s house began to pop and crackle, adding to the atmosphere.

Watching Tingyang’s hurried, frantic state, Yu Yan felt a wave of pity. He wanted to stroke the man’s face and help him, but they were separated by a wall, and he could not reach out. He watched the man’s usually calm gaze turn red with longing for him, his forearm veins bulging with effort, until finally, sweat dripped to the floor. Yu Yan felt his heart stop. This version of Tingyang—the Tingyang who lost himself in desire for him—fascinated him just as much.

Zheng Tingyang knelt before the mirror, his Adam’s apple bobbing again. He let out a long, heavy breath and pressed his palm against the glass, slowly tilting his head up. His eyes were red-rimmed and held a damp, pleading quality. Slowly, his gaze moved upward.

Through the glass, Yu Yan met his eyes.

The glass was not soundproof.

Zheng Tingyang asked, “Little Fish, do I look good?”

Support