The White Moonlight I Chased, the Divorce I Never Expected - Chapter 42

Chi Yi was still in a heightened, irritable state. She paused for a moment, then closed her laptop. It had only been playing some product promotional videos, which no longer entertained her.

With everything now settled and the time nearing 3 p.m., Chi Yi carried Wen Ranqing out of the study.

A faint, almost imperceptible laugh escaped. Wen Ranqing realized she had overthought things. Resting her cheek against Chi Yi’s neck, she wore an expression of quiet avoidance and curled up tighter in Chi Yi’s arms. She had originally asked for a day off to comfort Chi Yi during her susceptibility period, yet now it seemed like she was the one being cared for.

The strap of her nightgown slipped off her shoulder. Unaware of her own allure, Wen Ranqing instinctively pressed herself against Chi Yi. Steeling her thoughts, Chi Yi walked toward the bedroom door and asked softly along the way, “What do you want to do now?”

Chi Zhong, who had been away on a trip, was returning home today. If Chi Yi didn’t go back tonight, it would be hard to explain. Work had already taken up so much of her day, but whatever Wen Ranqing wanted to do now, she was ready to oblige.

Her voice was gentle, sincerely asking for Wen Ranqing’s preference. For a moment, Wen Ranqing paused. Her face still carried a faint flush from being teased earlier, and in her eyes was a rare touch of unease—something that only ever appeared in front of Chi Yi.

She had long been accustomed to letting Chi Yi take the lead when they were together. Now that the choice was placed in her hands, a wave of sweetness surged unexpectedly in her heart. She couldn’t help but look at Chi Yi’s expression as she spoke.

Chi Yi’s expression was warmer than usual. The cold and distant facade she had worn so many times over the past four years had melted away. In those radiant eyes—so often the centerpiece of Wen Ranqing’s dreams—there now shone an affection even Chi Yi herself might not have realized. Wen Ranqing’s heart gave a heavy thump. She stayed silent for a long while, her eyes beginning to sting with emotion.

Whatever Chi Yi wanted, Wen Ranqing would accept sweetly and gladly. Even such a small gesture could bring her joy for a long time. For no particular reason, she felt closer to Chi Yi now.

After thinking for quite a while, Chi Yi subtly sensed the seriousness behind Wen Ranqing’s silence. A tender feeling of being cherished and needed spread through her, softening her heart. She gently patted the soft flesh on the outside of Wen Ranqing’s arm. “Hmm?”

Being coddled like a baby made Wen Ranqing both shy and embarrassed. She immediately turned her face away, avoiding Chi Yi’s gaze.

After a moment of hesitation, she spoke in a soft, slow voice. “Shall we watch a movie?”

“Mhm, anything you like.”

The projector lit up the room, casting light only around the screen while the rest of the space remained dim. Chi Yi changed into more comfortable clothes and lay down beside Wen Ranqing. A light floral scent lingered in the air. On an afternoon like this, even without taking a suppressant, she felt at peace. The only warmth rising in her chest came from the woman beside her. She reached out and gently pulled a thin blanket over the lacy gown.

Chi Yi had little interest in art films or romantic dramas. If it were a suspense film, she might tolerate it. But to her surprise, Wen Ranqing had picked something rather intense. Ten minutes into the movie, Wen Ranqing—now curled up in her arms—was visibly pale, though she said not a word.

Chi Yi found herself becoming engrossed in the film as well. When a particularly frightening scene approached, she noticed Wen Ranqing’s lips slightly parted, her breathing shallow, clearly tense but unable to look away. Chi Yi raised her hand to cover her eyes.

The sudden warmth around her eyes made Wen Ranqing blink instinctively. Still clutching Chi Yi’s shirt from fear, she now felt slightly self-conscious at the gesture, her ears burning.

Chi Yi’s palm tingled slightly, followed by the faintest trace of moisture. She couldn’t even bring herself to tease Wen Ranqing for still being scared at thirty. She waited for the scene to pass, then paused the film and began browsing romance titles.

“If you’re scared, don’t force yourself. Pick something you like.”

Wen Ranqing lowered her eyes slightly. When Chi Yi was still a teenager, she had known exactly which limited-edition perfume Wen Ranqing liked. She had queued for hours in secret, without telling Chi Zhong, just to hand it to her the next morning before Wen Ranqing left for work with Wen Ting, right in front of the Wen family home.

Back then, Chi Yi had just entered high school, full of youthful pride and bright, clear eyes. With dew still clinging to her hair, she had smiled sweetly and called out, “Sister,” like a little sun warming the heart. Wen Ranqing had been moved by that smile too. She had only lightly curved her lips and patted Chi Yi’s head before getting into the car and leaving.

It wasn’t until a later prison visit that Chi Zhong laughed about Chi Yi’s childhood antics. That’s when Wen Ranqing found out Chi Yi hadn’t slept a wink that night, hadn’t eaten dinner or breakfast, and ended up fainting from low blood sugar during P.E., needing to be sent to the school infirmary. The teacher had to call her parents.

There were many things like that, unknown to Wen Ranqing at the time. If she had a chance to go back and do it all again, she thought she might not be able to hold back. She might have pulled that girl into her arms without hesitation. She wouldn’t have been able to suppress her feelings for so long.

Whenever Wen Ranqing thought of these things, guilt and regret weighed heavily on her chest. She blamed herself for choosing to avoid it, for paying too little attention to Chi Yi.

Now, she wanted to know more about Chi Yi’s preferences, to inch closer, little by little, and become a worthy pursuer. Her fingers clenched slightly. Then, with a soft voice full of tenderness, she said, “I’m sorry.”

“What are you apologizing for? For not being able to watch a suspense film?”

Chi Yi frowned slightly. From the moment she entered the room, she had felt that something about her interaction with Wen Ranqing was off. It was only now that she fully realized what it was. Sitting up slightly, her tone turned serious. “Look at me.”

Wen Ranqing’s hair was a little messy, her gaze restless and uneasy—like she had truly done something wrong. But she obediently lifted her eyes to meet Chi Yi’s, once again confirming her suspicions.

Their eyes met, and the air between them felt heated. Yet Chi Yi’s heart softened. She reached out to tuck the thin blanket more securely over Wen Ranqing’s shoulders, her expression full of affection and helplessness. “This isn’t your fault. It’s not that serious. From now on, don’t say sorry for things like this.”

Wen Ranqing stared at her blankly. The blanket covered most of her body, but her exposed ankle was slender and pale, its delicate bones seemingly fragile—like she could be held between a thumb and forefinger. She looked particularly easy to bully. Her peach blossom-shaped eyes stayed locked onto Chi Yi’s, shimmering faintly, like a kitten intently listening to its owner, helpless and vulnerable.

Chi Yi’s gaze gradually heated, and in a flash, she suddenly understood the phrase lust clouding judgment. Her throat went dry. Suppressing those inappropriate thoughts, she continued, “And stop listening to me for everything.”

“Next time, if you want to do something, just do it. Or tell me—we’ll do it together. But don’t keep it to yourself, okay?”

Before being Chi Yi’s partner, Wen Ranqing should first be her own person. Though Chi Yi didn’t know why Wen Ranqing had grown so used to leaning on her for everything, she clearly understood: their relationship couldn’t go on like this.

For over a decade, the Wen Ranqing she liked had never been a flawless deity on a pedestal. Wen Ranqing had her joys, her sorrows, her many sides. And Chi Yi understood, accepted, and was deeply drawn to every single one of them—that’s why she loved her.

She adored the obedient, gentle Wen Ranqing, but also admired the Wen Ranqing who had her own thoughts. There was no need for her to accommodate Chi Yi or change who she was for her sake.

When she finished speaking, Wen Ranqing opened her mouth as if to agree, but hesitated. She stayed silent for a long time.

She didn’t realize Chi Yi was thinking about the long-term health of their relationship—she simply thought Chi Yi preferred women who were more opinionated. But she genuinely wanted to follow Chi Yi’s lead in everything. Deep down, she believed her own thoughts weren’t as valuable as Chi Yi’s, and that speaking them would only cause trouble.

Thinking this, Wen Ranqing pressed her lips tightly together, clutching the blanket that still held Chi Yi’s warmth. Her chest ached, her eyes stung. She was so afraid that Chi Yi would come to hate her…

She wasn’t afraid of being left behind again.

What she feared was that one day, when Chi Yi looked back on their time together, she would only feel suffocated and regretful—that even now, this moment of companionship existed only because Chi Yi was trying to take responsibility for last night.

Chi Yi let out a quiet sigh. If this was Wen Ranqing’s way of processing things, she was taking far too long. How is it that my Ranqing, so sharp and capable in the outside world, becomes so clueless and adorably timid with me? A warmth flooded her chest, softening her gaze. She could no longer maintain a stern front, and instead reached out with infinite patience to hold her.

Chi Yi’s familiar scent drew closer. Wen Ranqing told herself not to be greedy, not to cause Chi Yi more trouble—but she couldn’t bring herself to pull away. She couldn’t refuse the warmth of Chi Yi’s embrace. The moment those arms wrapped around her, a tear slipped down her cheek, impossible to hold back.

The salty droplet soaked into the soft white cotton of Chi Yi’s clothes. Panicked, Wen Ranqing tried to raise a hand to wipe it away, but both her arms were held by Chi Yi. She watched as a wet patch slowly spread over Chi Yi’s shoulder. Guilt overwhelmed her like a vast, dark curtain, swallowing her whole world.

Chi Yi hadn’t even begun to respond, wanting only for Wen Ranqing to understand her slowly. But then she felt the woman in her arms start to tremble, and it only worsened. Alarmed, she worried that maybe she had spoken too harshly just now. In a fluster, she reached for the tissues on the nightstand—but Wen Ranqing gently pulled her back.

Her grip wasn’t strong, but it was enough to keep Chi Yi right there, cradling her, unable to go anywhere.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” Wen Ranqing’s tears wouldn’t stop. Chi Yi’s shoulder was already soaked. Her heart ached dully, and her voice turned hoarse with sorrow. She kept rubbing Wen Ranqing’s back, soothing her breath, and pressed a comforting kiss to her soft ear.

Wen Ranqing’s whole body was flushed. She let out a few quiet sobs, trembling slightly. After a long while, she finally spoke in a weak, breathless voice: “Xiao Yi…”

“Mhm,” Chi Yi answered, her lips pressed gently against Wen Ranqing’s neck, feeling the slight tremor there.

“Xiao Yi, you don’t… you don’t have to take responsibility for me.”

“Last night… it was something I chose to do willingly…”

Don’t be this good to me because of that night.
If that’s the reason, then I’ll let you go before this embrace ends.

Chi Yi froze.

From Wen Ranqing’s collarbone all the way down were the marks she had left—yet this woman still thought that way?

Frustration flickered across Chi Yi’s face. She didn’t give Wen Ranqing any chance to continue overthinking. With ease, she broke free from the weak grip on her shirt and pressed a firm kiss to her lips. It was deep and fierce, her tongue sweeping in demand, as though trying to prove her desire with this kiss alone. Only when the hand clutching her shirt went slack and lost strength did she finally let go.

“Did I make you feel so insecure?”

Chi Yi exhaled heavily, pressing the pad of her finger gently against Wen Ranqing’s swollen, reddened lips. Guilt clouded her eyes. The woman was still softly sobbing, too overwhelmed to respond. Chi Yi cupped her face carefully, her own eyes beginning to redden—blaming herself for not doing better, and aching at the thought that Wen Ranqing had been carrying such hopeless thoughts all alone.

She waited until Wen Ranqing had calmed down slightly. Looking into her teary, bewildered eyes, Chi Yi’s voice dropped low and steady. “This… was something I chose to do too.”

This… was something Xiao Yi wanted to do…
Wen Ranqing’s mind buzzed, slowly piecing the words together one by one. It took her a long while to fully process what Chi Yi had just said. She looked at her through tears, disbelieving.

It took a long moment.

“I’m going to get some tissues, okay?” Chi Yi smiled warmly.

Still dazed, Wen Ranqing nodded obediently.

With the crying soothed, Chi Yi felt a little more at ease, even amused. As she helped wipe Wen Ranqing’s tear-streaked face, she couldn’t resist teasing, “What exactly did you think you were to me, Director Wen?”

“My hookup? A one-night stand?”

She leaned in close, her breath warm against Wen Ranqing’s ear. “Hookups usually come with a lot more tricks, you know…”

Of course Wen Ranqing understood what she meant. Her face flushed scarlet, and she weakly hit Chi Yi on the shoulder with a soft fist. “Xiao Yi…”

“Ow,” Chi Yi drawled, pretending to whine. Taking advantage of Wen Ranqing’s softened state, she suddenly pinned her down on the bed and deliberately left a vivid hickey in a conspicuous spot—so obvious it was impossible to miss.

Her voice was hoarse but firm: “From now on, no more overthinking. And no more bottling things up.”

“You’re the one I’ve officially certified.”

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