The Villainess A Marked the Seductive Movie Queen - Chapter 19

Chapter 19: Needs

The campus after dark on a day off was quiet; the chirping of insects ruffled by the wind in the grass only emphasized the tranquility.

Liu Yitong caught up in a few quick strides, slowing down just as she was one step away from being side-by-side with Ruan Minxue. She maintained that pace, walking with her but keeping a constant one-step gap.

She looked at the woman in front of her. Ruan Minxue glanced slightly to the side, but when her peripheral vision failed to capture the girl’s figure, she calmly turned back to look straight ahead, not turning again.

Even during private leisure time, Ruan Minxue’s posture remained upright and elegant, without the slightest relaxation. The night breeze brushed past her neck, stirring stray hairs and carrying the faint fragrance from that jade-like skin back to Liu Yitong’s breath.

Liu Yitong lowered her head, withdrawing her transgressive gaze. The truth of last night unsettled her heart, and the fragrance of tonight’s breeze stirred a restlessness within her. With these two forces canceling each other out, she actually managed to calm down.

“Sister Ruan, did I… disturb you last night?”

As she said this, Liu Yitong kept her head down. The one-step distance made her look humble and gentle, proactively placing herself in a subordinate position.

Yet, inferiority and pride are two sides of the same coin. Her behavior could also be interpreted as arrogance—arrogant enough to ignore the proactive approach of the person she had placed on a pedestal, obsessively maintaining that one-step distance.

“What do you think?”

Liu Yitong heard Ruan Minxue’s voice—cool and indifferent, like a window view obscured by winter fog, difficult to read.

She didn’t remember what had happened, so she had no clue why Ruan Minxue was suddenly so cold. She could only apologize:

“I’m sorry, Sister Ruan. I didn’t expect… that I would go looking for you…”

“So you think you came looking for me last night?”

Ruan Minxue’s voice finally gained some inflection; Liu Yitong had successfully piqued her curiosity. Liu Yitong looked closely and saw the corners of the other woman’s mouth curl into a slight angle, causing the winter fog to begin to lift.

Because of that slight smile, Liu Yitong realized she had misspoken, nearly exposing her hidden motives and instincts. Fortunately, she realized it early enough to hide it, saying steadily:

“Judging by common sense, it couldn’t have been you coming to find me, Sister Ruan.”

“Why not?” the other woman pressed, refusing to let go.

To mention status would be too worldly, so Liu Yitong thought of an excuse, asking back with a playful feint: “Is it possible you even knew my room number, Sister Ruan?”

“So, you knew my room number.”

She had been led right back through her own logic by Ruan Minxue.

Liu Yitong calmly sacrificed her teammate. “Don’t worry, Sister Ruan, I didn’t know the exact room number. A friend mentioned the general location to me in passing…”

“That friend… was it Shu Ran?”

Liu Yitong wasn’t surprised that Ruan Minxue knew of Shu Ran’s existence. After all, Shu Ran wasn’t just any fan; she was a major fansite administrator, and Ruan Minxue didn’t have an ordinary network of connections.

What did surprise her was that when Ruan Minxue mentioned “Shu Ran,” her tone turned cold again. The winter fog returned, leaving the observer outside the window lost once more.

“Sister Ruan…” Liu Yitong decided to ask directly, “Did I… do anything last night?”

“What do you think?”

It was that same seemingly dismissive, resistant response. However, Liu Yitong noticed that after saying those words, Ruan Minxue was watching her. Under the moonlight, her eyes were soft but not gentle, harboring depths of emotion that were bottomless.

Ruan Minxue wasn’t being dismissive; she was truly waiting for the girl’s guess.

Liu Yitong keenly sensed that the conversation tonight was unusual. The back-and-forth felt more like a test between a suspect and a detective—one hiding her tracks while probing for progress, the other peering back at the truth behind the deception.

Liu Yitong started to feel a headache. A person’s actions are tied to their identity and motives. What do you think you might have done to me?

If she were just a fan, perhaps she would have asked for an autograph. If she were a social climber, perhaps she would have asked for a favor. If she were an admirer, perhaps she would have sought intimacy.

Ruan Minxue’s question was almost undisguisedly testing her identity and motivation.

“I might have…” Liu Yitong didn’t lie. “…hoped you would stay with me for a while.”

Stay with me. It was true, yet vague enough to hide perfectly under any identity or motive.

“Heh…”

An ambiguous chuckle made the “suspect’s” heart race, unsure if she had successfully escaped.

As they spoke, they had completed a full lap around the athletic field and returned to the starting point by the school gate. Ruan Minxue stopped, showing no intention of continuing the walk.

Liu Yitong seized the last chance to ask: “So, Sister Ruan, what exactly did I do last night?”

“More or less what you thought,” Ruan answered vaguely, before adding a reminder: “Since you know your own situation, be careful. Try to have someone with you as much as possible.”

“Thank you, Sister Ruan. I’ll be more careful in the future.”

Ruan Minxue took a step back, leaving the track and stepping onto the green lawn. Liu Yitong remained in the red zone of the running track, making no move to follow. Seeing her intention, Ruan didn’t say more. She gave a nod and turned to leave.

Only when the woman’s figure shrunk in her vision and finally disappeared around the corner did Liu Yitong let out a long breath. The girl crouched down, hands pressed against her cheeks. The delayed heat touched by her palms burned all the way into her heart.

I still don’t know what exactly I did to her last night…

Her body relaxed, but her brain wouldn’t stop. Various thoughts popped up randomly: I know nothing. This unknown state is agonizing, yet it feels like a stroke of luck.

I can imagine whatever I want, right? Since things have come to this, let whatever happened in those blank memories be a reward for my occasional indulgence.

The night scenes were filmed very late. On the way back to the hotel, Liu Yitong thought again about Ruan Minxue’s warning on the field. After much consideration, she took out her phone to search for general hospitals in the city.

A hospital on the outskirts had a psychological counseling department. She clicked on the reservation page and saw that all the consultants were fully booked, except for one doctor who had an opening early tomorrow morning—likely a last-minute cancellation.

Liu Yitong caught the break and booked the slot, then messaged the executive director to ask for the morning off.

Back at the hotel, she wanted to write in her diary. Since Ruan Minxue had stayed with her for a night, even if she remembered nothing, it was a momentous event. However, when she held her pen over the paper, she suddenly became wary. Since she might go out or even carry her diary while unconscious, there was a risk of exposing her secrets.

After careful thought, she used the hotel safe to lock the diary away. Before sleeping, she even took photos of the items in her room.

Lying in bed, she didn’t feel the sensation of being grounded. Staring at the ceiling in the dark, she felt her thoughts and body swaying together. She had to check several times if the pendant on the bedside lamp was still to confirm it wasn’t an earthquake.

Fortunately, the floating sensation acted like a cradle, and she eventually drifted off. In her half-asleep state, she was still curious: What did I do last night? And what did Ruan Minxue do?

Why have I fallen asleep so quickly and had such high-quality sleep these past two nights?

Good sleep wasn’t an illusion.

First, after comparing her morning photos, everything was exactly as it was the night before. This proved she hadn’t gotten up to interact with anything during the night.

Second, the medical checkup. Following the doctor’s instructions, she first went to the endocrinology department for a hormone analysis. In the past, her cortisol levels—highly correlated with sleep and mood—were always over the limit. Today, however, those indicators were not red-flagged.

In contrast to the physical data were the results of her psychological tests. The consultant, He Sen, initially had her do the SCL-90 (90-item symptom checklist). After the results came out, her expression tightened slightly. She comforted Yitong for a few minutes, asked a few questions, and then had her switch to the MMPI-1 and 2.

The process was gentle. He Sen was a professional female doctor—tender and stable. Whenever Liu Yitong showed resistance, such as frowning or rapid breathing when stung by past memories, Dr. He was able to soothe her appropriately.

However, He Sen soon realized that while Liu Yitong answered every question and appeared more emotionally stable than most girls her age, that stability was precisely the most complex and unnatural part.

Even stable middle-aged people often break down when mentioning childhood or early experiences. The trigger can be as insignificant as a cheap chocolate coin they couldn’t afford or a toy car stolen by a classmate. But Liu Yitong was unnaturally calm. Even when describing the time her father almost strangled her to death, she acted like an audience member watching a poorly written drama she couldn’t relate to.

“Dissociative Fugue. Your trigger is sleep.”

In the last ten minutes of the consultation, He Sen gave a gentle summary. Seeing the flash of bewilderment on Liu Yitong’s face, she explained:

“The dissociative state is the last line of defense for the human psyche. You might observe that some people show calm or vacuity under extreme disaster—a sense of detachment where the soul rises to watch its own suffering from a bystander’s perspective. Like a toddler watching parents argue fiercely, or a survivor of a natural disaster… or a student listening to a high-level math problem.”

“Pfft.” The last example successfully lightened the mood and made Liu Yitong laugh.

The smile was brief, and her face soon clouded over again, but even a moment of relaxation made He Sen feel more at ease. She continued:

“Your fugue state is protecting you; that’s the good news. Your brain is preventing you from breaking down. But at the same time, we must realize that manifesting such a pathological disorder means the load your environment places on you is already too heavy.

“Fortunately, from your description, we know that after contacting the person you have a crush on the night before last, you haven’t entered a dissociative state again. Your sleep quality improved, and your gland status is stable… The safety and satisfaction you seek in the dissociative state, that person provided for you. I think perhaps we could, with that person…”

“I’m sorry.”

He Sen had skillfully increased her volume in the latter half of her description, making it quite stirring and immersive. But Liu Yitong didn’t fall for it. Instead, she keenly felt uncomfortable and proactively interrupted:

“Doctor, I will cooperate with you on any method other than involving her.”

He Sen took a breath and smiled, trying to elaborate on the philosophy:

“‘Dissociation’ implies a need for ‘integration.’ The prerequisite for integration is that the rejected, wandering parts of your fragmented personality can be re-accepted by you. Right now, that part of you has always been ignored and never satisfied. The reason I suggested involving ‘that person’ in our treatment plan is that I believe she might be able to satisfy your long-suppressed, true needs.”

But Liu Yitong shook her head. Her face was youthful, but her expression was transcendently clear. “I am very aware of what I went through to become ill. I am also very aware of what that person means to me. She is the only joy remaining in my suffering, but none of it has anything to do with her as a person. In other words, to me, she is an abstract symbol.

“The process of liking her is the entire meaning for me. To end up in a relationship as a companion like a normal person would be an intrusion and a disturbance to her, and a risk to me. If the real her loses the role of a ‘symbol’ in my heart, my spirit will lose its final support, and the loss would outweigh the gain.”

He Sen didn’t speak. She wasn’t convinced by Liu Yitong; she was merely surprised by the girl’s eloquence and simultaneously saddened by her stubbornness.

Many people choose to escape and argue with fallacies when first facing unacceptable reality—like a gambler on a losing streak, a wife convinced of her husband’s loyalty, or a soldier who saw his comrade die yet believes he is still alive. Or this girl, who deliberately distinguished between a “crush” and “faith.”

Dissociation was her defense mechanism. Abstracting her crush into an unattainable symbol was likely another.

But He Sen was professional. She didn’t interfere with the patient’s decision and fully respected her wishes, saying inclusively: “I understand. Our next treatment will include counseling and medication. The medication will focus on anti-depression and anxiety, while the counseling will focus on dealing with the core issues.”

“Thank you, Doctor.”

“You’re very welcome.” He Sen remembered a detail from the session and added: “I suggest you be kinder to yourself in the dissociative state. ‘She’ is already very ‘pitiful.’ Try to satisfy her and pamper her; at least don’t bully ‘her.’ Don’t tie ‘her’ up or make ‘her’ wear a bite inhibitor anymore.”

“That night, it was just that ‘she’ was willing to cooperate with you. If ‘she’ weren’t, perhaps ‘she’ would have resisted more fiercely. After all…” He Sen paused and emphasized: “‘She’ is you. And you, Yitong, are very smart. ‘She’ is the same.”

Liu Yitong had only taken the morning off and returned to the set in the afternoon.

The first scene was the domestic daily life of Qiao Jing and Du Ran. The girl, whose parents were away all year, neglected herself and had irregular meals. Fortunately, after learning about this, Du Ran forced Qiao Jing to come to her house for every meal, knocking on her door or phone-bombing her if she didn’t show up. Du Ran’s concern was fierce and blunt. Most sensitive adolescents wouldn’t be able to stand it, but Qiao Jing relished it.

The older sister cooked her a bowl of noodles, which she enjoyed so slowly that Du Ran almost suspected her cooking was bad.

Before filming, Liu Yitong couldn’t help but comment that maybe Qiao Jing intentionally skipped meals to trick Du Ran into caring for her. These words made Director Zhang Lishen perk up, and he immediately told them to add this into the dialogue—having Du Ran make a joke about it, while Qiao Jing responded with a flash of panic and bewilderment.

“Indeed, it takes a girl to understand a girl. This interaction immediately establishes Du Ran’s ‘unawareness’ and Qiao Jing’s ‘delicate heart.’ The characters have come alive!” Assistant Director Yue Yi was generous with her praise. “This little detail… I’m afraid it wouldn’t come to mind without having had a crush eight hundred times!”

“…” Liu Yitong’s gaze stilled for a second.

This moment was captured by Zhang Lishen again. He quickly said: “Yes! That’s the expression! When Du Ran jokes later, play it just like that!”

Filming went smoothly. The only obstacle was the props. To look good on camera, the crew’s food usually sacrificed “smell” and “taste” for “color.” The bowl of noodles Du Ran cooked for Qiao Jing looked incredibly inviting on camera, but what went into Liu Yitong’s mouth was salty and hard. Fortunately, she was good at overcoming her instincts and endured it well, keeping her facial expressions perfect over two takes.

Only when the director called “Cut” did she spit out the unswallowed remains and rinse her mouth at the kitchen sink.

Xiao Zhizi approached her then, familiarly grabbing her arm and rubbing her head against her like a pet cat. “Yitong, I missed you so much! Do you know? When I came in this morning and found out you had taken leave, it felt like discovering my deskmate was absent—the grief of a widow!”

The girl’s voice was loud and her metaphor was exaggerated, but her sentiment was sincere, making the crew members laugh. Even Liu Yitong smiled slightly, letting her cling to her.

Xiao Zhizi muttered: “But is the crew’s food really that bad? Sister Ruan had an eating scene this morning—the company bento kind—and they say it was so bad she threw up. She had a poor appetite and didn’t even eat lunch.”

“She didn’t eat lunch?” Liu Yitong caught the key point.

Because she turned her head while speaking, Liu Yitong saw Ruan Minxue walking toward them from not far away. The camera crew was preparing to move, and the bulky camera was pushed back, taking up space. Seeing that Ruan Minxue could almost only pass them by brushing against them, Liu Yitong instinctively pulled Xiao Zhizi closer to her, making room.

To her surprise, Ruan Minxue didn’t pass. She stood right in the space Liu Yitong had cleared, her gaze sweeping over the two girls who were touching so closely they were almost embracing.

Liu Yitong’s gaze also swept over Ruan Minxue. The other woman was still wearing the silk shirt and high-waisted pants from their scene. She leaned lazily against the edge of the kitchen counter. The desireless Beta-vibe of an office worker was perfectly displayed by this outfit, but on Ruan Minxue, it carried a contradictory allure.

Liu Yitong took a step to the side. She was suddenly sensitive now, unable to stand anyone leaning toward her.

Xiao Zhizi didn’t notice and proactively greeted Ruan: “Sister Ruan, why are you here?”

“Picking up a prop.” The woman reached out across the counter for a Hetian jade bracelet and slid it onto her wrist.

“Do you feel better now, Sister Ruan?” Xiao Zhizi asked with concern. “You haven’t eaten since this morning.”

Ruan Minxue acted as if it were normal. “That’s how filming is. We’ll be moving and starting work again soon; there’s no time to order food, and I don’t know how to cook.”

“Ugh, I don’t know how to cook either. What a waste of a functional kitchen!” Xiao Zhizi turned to the person beside her, about to speak.

But before she could ask, Liu Yitong spoke up: “I do.”

Ruan Minxue had been looking at Xiao Zhizi, but at those words, her gaze drifted over to Liu Yitong’s face. The girl appeared expressionless, but her eyes were strangely firm, carrying a hidden sense of striving. She repeated: “I do.”

But that was all. she didn’t say anything more, just laid out all her cards for picking. If she wants it, I’ll give it; if she doesn’t, I won’t push.

Ruan Minxue looked at the distance the two had created between them, raised her eyes, and chuckled. “Then could I trouble you to cook a bowl of noodles for me?”

“Of course.”

It wasn’t surprising for someone of high status to avoid the kitchen. Liu Yitong didn’t know how to cook either, but she learned after her mother fell ill. The crew had some fresh ingredients in the fridge to make the kitchen feel more lived-in. Liu Yitong used what was available to prepare clear soup ramen for Ruan Minxue.

She added a few drops of peanut oil to the boiling water to make it shine. When the noodles were eighty percent cooked, she fished them out and shocked them in cold water for a minute to give them bounce, then put them back into the hot water to cook through. She added salt, chicken powder, scallions, and lard for aroma. After dishing it up, she topped it with a fried egg with a runny yolk and sautéed fragrant mushrooms, then sprinkled sesame and seaweed flakes over the top.

Two steaming bowls of noodles were served. Liu Yitong placed the chopsticks in front of Xiao Zhizi and Ruan Minxue without handing them directly to them. Her water-dipped knuckles were bright and clear like scallion stalks.

“There’s actually a portion for me too! Thank you, baby!” Xiao Zhizi threw herself into her seat at the table with delight and started slurping the noodles.

The word “baby” made Liu Yitong’s heart tremble; straight girls always use such terms without thinking. For no reason, she felt a pang of guilt and glanced at Ruan Minxue, finding that the other woman was also looking at her. The steam rising from the bowls filled the air, blocking their intertwined gazes. It made the eye contact hazy; when the fog cleared and their gazes moved away, the connection just now felt like an illusion.

Liu Yitong didn’t dare and couldn’t bear to probe too much into Ruan Minxue, but in that one glance, she was indeed curious about what Ruan was thinking.

Xiao Zhizi was slurping the noodles happily, praising Liu Yitong’s skill. “I usually have such a strong palate—heavy spice and salt—and I can’t eat anything this light, but Yitong, you’ve changed my DNA!”

“Exaggerating.” Liu Yitong smiled at Xiao Zhizi, not looking at Ruan Minxue.

Xiao Zhizi turned to look at Ruan Minxue and found that she wasn’t looking at them either. She was looking down at her noodles. The thin, oily noodles rolled into her lips, and before long, the warmth brought some color back to her pale face.

Xiao Zhizi finally witnessed the meaning of “a feast for the eyes” and sighed with satisfaction. “Sister Ruan is also eating well! Only now do I remember why Yitong cooked something so light—because Sister Ruan’s palate has always been very light!”

Ruan Minxue raised her eyes. “You know?”

“Of course I know! I’m the number one fan of Sister Ruan in this crew!” Xiao Zhizi was beating her chest to guarantee it when she suddenly realized something. She looked up at the standing Liu Yitong. “I’m a fan, so I know her taste. You know her taste too—are you a fan as well?”

Liu Yitong didn’t admit it publicly, only saying ambiguously: “One shouldn’t eat anything too heavy when they have a poor appetite.”

“True…” Xiao Zhizi was indeed led away. “Then I’m still the number one fan of Sister Ruan in this crew!” After speaking, the girl continued slurping happily.

Of the three women present, two were staring at Xiao Zhizi, while Xiao Zhizi was staring at the noodles.

After the meal, Liu Yitong naturally went to collect the dishes. Xiao Zhizi insisted on finishing the cleanup as a reward. Ruan Minxue also intended to lend a hand, but she was rejected by Xiao Zhizi’s scream to protect her idol’s precious hands.

Coincidentally, Zhang Lishen called for Ruan Minxue over there. She greeted the two girls and left. Left alone, Liu Yitong and Xiao Zhizi both breathed a sigh of relief by the sink. They smiled at each other, both understanding what the other was thinking.

Xiao Zhizi suddenly said: “As the saying goes, to capture someone’s heart, you must first capture their stomach! Yitong, you did it!”

Liu Yitong froze, about to find words to cover it up, when she heard Xiao Zhizi continue:

“You’ve conquered me! From now on, we are sisters from different mothers!”

“…Ha.” Liu Yitong laughed at herself.

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