The Story of a Modest Young Lady Who Formed a New Engagement the Day After Her Engagement Was Annulled - Chapter 38

Ah, this is no good. Terrible. I, Fels, stride through the corridors of the Lotus Border Count’s estate, heading toward the dining hall.

—I desperately suppress the beast-like, ugly urge to push her down right here and now and take her as my instincts demand, repeating in my mind for my heightened emotions to calm down, though the effect is practically nonexistent. Ever since marrying Eleanora, my love for her has only continued to grow.

We had been living together at the viscountcy estate I inherited from my father, but with her pregnancy as the trigger, we’ve been staying temporarily at the Lotus Border Count’s estate. The reasoning was that there are more people here knowledgeable about pregnancy, and Eleanora would likely feel more at ease.

She doesn’t voice her own opinions, so it might seem like I decided this arbitrarily, but it should be more reassuring than staying at the viscountcy estate. When her morning sickness began, I was truly anxious, fearing she might vanish from this world.

Her complexion was terribly poor, and she could no longer keep down the foods she had previously enjoyed. I was at my wits’ end, falling into anxiety like a child who’d lost sight of their parents. Eleanora tried bravely to ease my worries, but her condition didn’t improve. Determined to find a solution, I consulted a friend.

Heinrich found my distress highly amusing, and Her Highness the Princess Consort advised that we stay either with the Lotus Border Count’s family or the Narcissus Count’s family.

We decided to stay with the Lotus Border Count’s family, which is relatively close to my viscountcy, and that’s how we ended up here. My family was making a huge celebratory fuss over Eleanora bearing a child. I was worried it might burden her, but my mother has been handling that aspect.

My father, excited about his first grandchild, had been ordering stuffed toys and infant toys from all over, but a sharp word from my mother put a stop to that. My two younger brothers were also getting carried away, but their spouses admonished them not to pressure Eleanora. I spend my days marveling at how strong women are while staying by Eleanora’s side. I’d really prefer to be with her around the clock, ready to act if anything happens… but when I tried staying too close at the border count’s estate, my mother grabbed me by the scruff of the neck and lectured me for what felt like four hours. How tedious.

Since Eleanora is the one going through the most hardship, I must handle my own affairs myself, I think as I head to the dining hall, the words slipping out unconsciously.

“Mmm…”

Before I know it, my feet have stopped, and I’m facing the wall for some reason. Sensing someone’s presence unexpectedly, I turn around to find the old butler looking at me with a puzzled expression.

“Young master, is something the matter?”

“So, about that form of address.”

“Ah, of course. As proof, this old man does not use it in front of the mistress, correct?”

“Well, that’s true. Did you stop me for some reason?”

The impure thoughts I’d been harboring until moments ago had flown away somewhere with the old butler’s appearance. Feeling both relieved and somewhat disappointed, I have to deal with him now.

“Young master, you were walking down the hallway looking quite troubled, so this old man grew concerned.”

“I was just thinking about Eleanora. Every day brings new worries, it feels more unsettling than being on the battlefield.”

I complain to the old butler, who chuckles. Truly, every day I’m unbearably concerned about Eleanora. Even walking up and down stairs alone might be dangerous, and she could trip even on the carpet.

I worry about Eleanora, but the child in her womb is also precious. I’ve heard she shouldn’t get chilled, and she needs to eat highly nutritious meals for the baby’s sake.

I want Eleanora to eat more, but her appetite is small. She stops eating long before I feel full. I can’t help thinking she should eat more, though I know men and women have different dietary needs. Even knowing that, is my wish for her to eat more out of worry just my own selfishness?

Sighing that I was calmer back when I was on the battlefield, I notice the old butler raising one eyebrow and smiling.

“By the way. Young master.”

“Hm?”

“You’ve passed the dining hall.”

“…You should have said so sooner!”

The old butler smirks and points back down the hallway I came from. Feeling both foolish about what I’m doing and embarrassed by his obvious teasing, I stride back the way I came and enter the dining hall.

Relieved to see Eleanora hasn’t arrived yet, I request the meal preparations and take my seat to wait for her. I wonder if today’s breakfast will include something she likes.

Come to think of it, while her appetite is small, she has almost no food preferences though she did struggle with meals during the worst of her morning sickness making it difficult to pinpoint her favorites. As I’m trying to recall if there’s any dish she particularly likes, Eleanora arrives. I rise from my seat and walk over to her. She seems slightly surprised by my action but waits for me by the door.

“Lord Fels, my apologies for keeping you waiting.”

I extend my arm to Eleanora and place it around her back.

“No! I’m glad you came slowly.”

Her beautiful smile makes me embarrassed about earlier, and my gaze drifts away on its own.

“?”

“It’s nothing. Let’s go.”

When I return my gaze, Eleanora is looking up at me with a puzzled expression. Finding that look adorable too, I smile slightly and guide her to her chair, noticing her ears have turned red. She never seems to get used to my escorting her, always showing that fresh, innocent side which I find pleasing. But part of me wishes she’d get accustomed to it soon.

Yet if she stopped blushing, I’d probably worry that I’m losing my appeal as a man. Even though we’re married and Eleanora is always by my side, why do I torment myself with such thoughts?

And so, after having breakfast with her and worrying over my territory’s administration and future plans, the days passed before I knew it.

—Several months later.

A new life was born at the Narcissus territory’s capital, in the lord’s residence. I had been pacing restlessly back and forth in the corridor outside the room, but the moment I heard the baby’s cry, my knees gave way and I collapsed, to the surprise of my brother-in-law Richard.

With his help, I stood up, and he gave a wry smile, saying, ‘Even the God of War gets nervous, huh.’ I shrugged, thinking it can’t be helped since it’s my first time, when Eleanora’s mother emerged from the room and informed us that the birth had gone safely.

Though I’d been shut out of the room, I finally received permission to enter where she was and hurriedly stepped inside.

“Eleanora!”

“Lord Fels… The baby has been born safely.”

When I called her name, she answered, looking utterly exhausted. In her arms, a tiny baby lay still, wrapped in white cloth. I rushed to her side, dropped to my knees, and cupped her cheek.

“……”

I’m so glad she’s truly safe. I’d heard that some lose their lives in childbirth and had been sick with worry. If I lost her, I feel I’d lose my reason for living, that’s how much I love her.

Even if only the child was safe… no, I should stop that line of thought. She is safe, and the baby was born healthy. Right now, I must simply offer my gratitude to her for risking her life to face childbirth. Even as I think this, I can’t form any words.

“Lord Fels?”

“Sorry. I don’t think I can put my current feelings into words.”

Feelings of relief and happiness. Frustration at my inability to speak properly to her. I don’t know what words to form for the tiny life before me.

“Are you crying?”

“Huh?”

“What a gentle person you are.”

Eleanora smiled softly and slowly reached her slender hand to my cheek, wiping away tears. Was I crying? When I touched the other eye she hadn’t wiped, I felt a cold sensation.

I don’t know why tears started falling from my eyes on their own. But I don’t feel bad about it at all. Her gentle fingers wiping my endless flow of tears feel simply, purely pleasant. When my tears finally stopped, Eleanora asked me to hold the baby.

I reached my arms toward the baby sleeping on her. Though a small life, it spent ten months inside her. I feel strangely nostalgic for the time when it was kicking vigorously in her womb. As I slowly lifted the baby, I felt like crying again.

“Ah, it’s Eleanora’s child…!”

“It’s your child too, Lord Fels.”

When I let out a sigh of wonder, Eleanora answered with a small laugh.

“Mine… I can’t really feel it yet.”

I can’t quite grasp that this is truly my child. The newborn’s face is still wrinkled, and I can’t tell if it resembles me or Eleanora.

“Without you, Lord Fels, this child would not have drawn its first breath.”

“Is that so? Yes, you’re right. It’s Eleanora’s and my child.”

Hearing Eleanora’s words, I desperately held back the urge to hug the baby tightly. How will the child in my arms grow from here? Well, I suppose anything is fine. I simply couldn’t help wishing for it to grow up healthy.