The Silly Shou Transmigrated Into a Book - Chapter 11

Gu Qiuyi sent a blushing panda emoji: “Do you mind having a son?”

Chu Yueguang: “…”

Chu Yueguang immediately transferred 10,000 yuan to him. “Don’t call me Dad.”

Gu Qiuyi swallowed hard, his fingers trembling. “I’m really not that kind of person!”

Chu Yueguang said: “It’s only one-four-hundredth of my allowance.”

Snap! Gu Qiuyi clicked “Accept” instantly. “Thank you, Dad!!!”

Chu Yueguang: “?”

Gu Qiuyi immediately corrected himself: “Brother.”

Satisfied, Chu Yueguang sent back an emoji of a small figure patting another figure’s head. Gu Qiuyi stared at the emoji in disbelief, momentarily speechless. This was the first time Chu Yueguang had ever sent an emoji to anyone, and he felt a wave of self-consciousness. After all, he prided himself on being steady and mature; he wasn’t like other young people his age who sent such lively, undignified stickers.

After a moment, Gu Qiuyi typed: “Brother, do you like cookies? I know how to make them. Can I bake some for you?”

Chu Yueguang waited a long while before replying: “I like them. You know how to bake?”

Gu Qiuyi: “Yeah! I used to work part-time at a school bakery. I watched the boss do it so often that I learned. Not just cookies—I can make cakes and do frosting. My frosting is beautiful! The boss even said I should open my own bakery someday. He’s so nice for not minding that I ‘stole’ his craft, waaaaah.”

Chu Yueguang frowned slightly. He had assumed Gu Qiuyi’s family background was decent, but the boy had to work part-time while studying? Combined with Gu Qiuyi’s previous mention of a conflict with his parents, Chu Yueguang suspected his relationship with his family was poor. Though he had doubts, he didn’t ask; he had no hobby of prying into others’ family affairs.

“Brother, give me your address. I’ll make them and send them over as fast as possible. I guarantee they’ll still be warm when you get them!”

Chu Yueguang: “Okay.”

He sent over his address—a very simple one: The Chu Residence, West City. He added his name; he didn’t even need to give a phone number. As long as the delivery reached the gates of the Chu Residence, the guards would deliver it to his hand.

Gu Qiuyi: “I’ll add lots of cranberries!! I guarantee they’ll be delicious!!”

Chu Yueguang: “Mm.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Waaaaah, Brother, you’re so cold.”

Chu Yueguang remained silent.

Gu Qiuyi: “Brother, you can say ‘Mm-mm’ instead. It won’t seem so cold; it’ll be much gentler.”

Chu Yueguang’s finger traced the screen. After hesitating for a long time, he sent: “Mm-mm.”

Gu Qiuyi: “Aya~ what bad intentions could a puppy have? .jpg” Gu Qiuyi: “It’s getting late. Brother, sleep early. I’m going to sleep too.”

Chu Yueguang: “Mm.” Then, as if remembering: “Mm-mm.”

Gu Qiuyi couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

The next day was the weekend, the perfect time for Gu Qiuyi to bake cookies for Chu Yueguang. Auntie Jiang had gone out for groceries, and Gu Qingbai and Liang Rong were at the office, so Gu Qiuyi used the kitchen openly.

The Gu family’s kitchen was huge and fully equipped. He found flour, eggs, butter, and powdered sugar in the cabinets, which saved him a lot of effort. Since there were no dried cranberries, he used an app to order half a pound and set to work.

He had made these cookies many times; he was a natural. While the bakery boss had said he could open his own shop, he knew it wasn’t that easy. It required capital and carried the risk of loss. He didn’t think he was cut out for business, so he never expected much.

In reality, studying was better. The saying “All paths are inferior; only scholarly pursuits are high” wasn’t without merit. Getting into college made finding a job much easier.

But he was “stupid.” He had grown up eating “hundred-family meals” in his village. By the time it was his neighbor auntie’s turn to raise him, he was already eight or nine. Perhaps because he was good-looking and well-behaved, the auntie let him “cut the line” to go to school even though her own children were still waiting. Even so, he didn’t start elementary school until he was nearly nine. He considered himself hardworking, yet he still couldn’t understand the lessons. In his first year, he scored only 10 or 20 points, making the young female teacher—a fresh college grad—cry tears of frustration.

He didn’t even know how he got through elementary school. It wasn’t until middle school that things “clicked.” His grades rose above passing. He finally mastered Pinyin—which he couldn’t learn for years—by constantly helping his roommate reply to nine different girlfriends. Because of that, his Chinese Literature scores improved significantly.

But compared to others, learning was still a struggle. He tried hard, followed the teacher’s instructions, and never skipped class. He was a very “good” student.

Studying requires talent, too.

After realizing this, Gu Qiuyi started using his roommate’s phone to read novels. After two years of multitasking, his grades didn’t drop; they actually rose slightly. He got into the town’s middle school instead of the crumbling one in the neighboring village. This proved a point: he truly had no talent for studying. Whether he tried or not, the result was the same.

He thought transmigrating would allow him to escape that harsh reality and be a carefree rich second generation. But the more he touched the reality of “Gu Qiuyi,” the more he realized his dream was precarious.

Sigh… if the original host is in my old body, he should be able to get into a good college, right? Compared to him, the original was much smarter. And unlike the “exquisite egoist” Gu parents, his own aunts and uncles back home were very kind. They were poor, but they were good to him and said they would work hard to put him through college.

Of course, he had already started saving money through part-time work, so he likely wouldn’t need theirs. By the way, he had 2,000 yuan sewn under his dormitory pillow. He hoped the “new” him would find it quickly and not throw away the old pillow—that was three years of savings for college tuition, though whether he could actually get into college was another story.

Lost in thought, Gu Qiuyi managed not to burn the cookies. Using molds, he made them all into the shape of cats. He tried one; the taste was just right. He quickly bagged them and cleaned the kitchen before Auntie Jiang returned. He immediately ordered a courier to deliver the cookies to the Chu Residence in West City. He painfully paid a 50-yuan tip to ensure the rider delivered them within half an hour.

Once finished, Gu Qiuyi began packing his things.

In truth, the Gu couple had been decent to the original host before he was ten. But as he grew older and showed no special talents—only a beautiful face—the Gu family deemed his beauty useless for a boy. He was discarded faster than one could imagine. Especially since his brother, Gu Dancheng, was so outstanding—dazzlingly so—making the host’s existence even more minuscule and dim.

A situation like this, being discarded like trash, surely existed in the novel. But since “Gu Qiuyi” wasn’t the protagonist, the author didn’t waste ink on it. Gu Qiuyi didn’t even know what the host felt when the Gu family went bankrupt because of him.

Probably… not as helpless as I imagined?

There were things Gu Qiuyi couldn’t bear to leave behind, so he chose to take everything. Adding the 500,000 yuan in cash, his luggage took up a lot of space. He barely managed to stuff it all into two large suitcases.

Once done, he harassed Jiang Hansa again. “Brother Hansa!”

Jiang Hansa saw the message and felt numb. “?”

Gu Qiuyi: “I’ve been kicked out of the house, waaaaah. Can you take me in?”

Jiang Hansa: “…” He really wanted to say no, but he understood this was a prime opportunity to “provide charcoal in the snow” (help in a time of need). He replied with difficulty: “Sure, waaaaah.”

Gu Qiuyi: “I’ll pay you rent!”

Jiang Hansa was startled. The iron rooster (miser) is actually offering money? He replied insincerely: “No need. Why are you being so polite?”

Gu Qiuyi: “But I’m so poor. Is 100 yuan a month okay?”

Jiang Hansa: “…” You might as well not give anything.

Jiang Hansa replied: “Forget it. But why don’t you live at school? The dorms are only 500 yuan a semester.”

Gu Qiuyi: “I’d have to wait until Monday to talk to the teacher about a dorm, right?”

Jiang Hansa hesitated. “So you plan to live at school? Then why did you say you wanted me to take you in and pay rent?”

Gu Qiuyi: “Hehehe, I just wanted to see if Brother Hansa would be polite with me. Sure enough, Brother Hansa is the best to me besides Brother Yueguang.”

Jiang Hansa: “…” Sometimes I think he’s stupid, and sometimes I think he’s incredibly calculating and sharp. Which one is his real face?

Jiang Hansa felt a flicker of curiosity, but he immediately quelled it. Being curious about someone who tortured his body and soul was not a good thing.

Jiang Hansa drove over personally to pick him up. Gu Qiuyi dragged his suitcases to the large iron gate. Seeing Jiang Hansa’s car stop in front of him, he immediately started huffing and puffing. “Brother Hansa, come help me with the cases, they’re so heavy!”

Jiang Hansa, who had no intention of getting out of the car: “…”

He opened the door with a grim face. The moment he faced Gu Qiuyi, his expression changed instantly to a bright, handsome smile. “Such big suitcases? You’ve worked hard, Qiuyi. Come, come, let me help you.”

He grabbed the two suitcases. The driver also got out to help, and together they hoisted them into the trunk. Before they could even get into the car, Gu Qiuyi called out: “Auntie Jiang.”

Jiang Hansa looked back to see a middle-aged woman. Based on her clothes, she was a nanny. He nodded politely but without much warmth. As a rich kid, Jiang Hansa possessed a natural disregard for ordinary people.

Auntie Jiang had worked at the Gu house for a while and had a keen eye. She could tell at a glance that Jiang Hansa was no ordinary person and his car was a luxury model. She wondered to herself but asked Gu Qiuyi, “You’re leaving?”

Gu Qiuyi smiled without a trace of gloom, not at all like trash being discarded. “Yeah! I’m never coming back. You’ll have a much easier time now, Auntie Jiang.”

Auntie Jiang said insincerely, “There’s no such thing as a grudge between father and son that lasts overnight. I’ll try to persuade your father later.”

Even she didn’t believe her own words. After so many years, didn’t she know Gu Qingbai’s temperament? Once Gu Qiuyi left, he was never coming back.

Gu Qiuyi said, “No need! He’s just jealous of my youth and vitality! He’s jealous of my peak condition, so he kicked me out! Once an old man gets jealous, it’s like dry wood meeting a raging fire! Tsk, tsk, tsk—terrifying!”

As he spoke, he looked at Jiang Hansa. Though it was just a look, Jiang Hansa strangely hallucinated Gu Qiuyi’s voice in his head: Learn from me!!

Jiang Hansa: “…” Jiang Hansa performed a soulless reading: “Once an old man gets jealous, it’s like dry wood meeting a raging fire. Tsk, tsk, tsk—terrifying!”

Auntie Jiang: “…” She suddenly felt that Gu Qiuyi really deserved to be kicked out.