The Sickly Beauty Official Faked His Death and Now the Tyrant Has Gone Mad - Chapter 23

Flurries of snow drifted down from the heavens, the scene identical to that of this day last year. The cold wind howled through the air, sharp and biting like the edge of a blade.

Another New Year’s Eve had arrived. Though the palace was adorned with festive decorations, there was little joy in the air.

Su Yang sat alone in the imperial garden. The arrangements here were exactly the same as the previous year fine wine and delicacies, lanterns and celebratory silks yet no one approached, leaving the place exceptionally quiet.

He filled his cup with wine, drained it in one gulp, then filled it again and drank once more. His gaze remained fixed on the spot slightly to the right and below him the very place where Lin Huaiyu had sat with him last year.

But today, that elegant figure was nowhere to be seen.

For over half a year, Lin Huaiyu had vanished without a trace. Su Yang had sent out search parties, issued wanted notices across the land, and tried every possible means. All he wanted was even the slightest bit of news to know where Lin Huaiyu was, how he was faring.

Yet Lin Huaiyu seemed to have truly disappeared, leaving no trace or word behind.

Everyone told him that Lin Huaiyu was already dead, that no matter how hard he searched, he would never find him. But Su Yang refused to believe it. He refused to believe that Lin Huaiyu could die. He had never believed it.

He knew that if Lin Huaiyu wanted to hide, finding him would indeed be difficult. But as long as he was alive, Su Yang was certain he would find him. He could wait.

Lost in these thoughts, Su Yang drank himself into a stupor. Only when drunk could he “see” Lin Huaiyu.

“Teacher Happy New Year,” he murmured, raising his cup toward the empty seat where Lin Huaiyu sat in his vision.

“Lin Huaiyu” did not respond, merely lowering his gaze, refusing to even look at him, his expression icy cold.

A flicker of pain crossed Su Yang’s eyes. He walked over to stand before “Lin Huaiyu,” gazing at him as he asked, “Teacher, are you angry? Angry at what I did to him, at how I failed to protect you?”

“Lin Huaiyu” remained silent.

Su Yang took another gulp of wine. He reached out, wanting to touch Lin Huaiyu. “Teacher, I miss you…”

But the moment his fingertips brushed against “Lin Huaiyu,” the illusion shattered instantly, like the moon in a mirror or flowers in water fragile and fleeting at the slightest touch.

Su Yang’s eyes trembled, a faint redness tingeing the rims. He stared at the vanished “Lin Huaiyu,” his nose stinging with emotion. “Teacher, where are you? I know I was wrong. I promise I won’t treat you like that again…”

But no one answered him. The mighty emperor of Great Yong could only speak to an empty seat, talking to himself like a madman.

Su Yang slumped over the table, utterly drunk. That day, he had wanted to spend the New Year peacefully with Lin Huaiyu, but in the end, it had not turned out well. He was always like this unconsciously hurting Lin Huaiyu, yet…

Yet all he truly wanted was for Lin Huaiyu to stay by his side.

Drunk but stubbornly refusing to let De Fu or the others approach, Su Yang stumbled through the imperial garden. He had wanted to spend the New Year with Lin Huaiyu, a celebration just for the two of them.

But that wish had ultimately gone unfulfilled. Lin Huaiyu was not here, and his illusion had been shattered by his own touch. All he could do was wander alone along the empty palace paths.

When he looked up at the moon, Su Yang seemed to see Lin Huaiyu on its surface. He finally managed a smile uglier than tears: “Teacher, do I still get a gift this year?”

Lin Huaiyu had burned the peace charm. What was he thinking at that moment? Was he thinking that from then on, he would never give him gifts again?

Su Yang lowered his eyes despondently, suddenly remembering the gifts Lin Huaiyu had given him over the years, all carefully stored away in the imperial study.

Since there was no gift this year, he would go look at those gifts instead.

As if recalling some treasure, Su Yang suddenly quickened his pace toward the imperial study.

Defu followed closely behind, ready to attend to Su Yang at any moment. Seeing him head for the study, he hurried to keep up.

For most of this year, His Majesty’s condition had truly been poor. He often imagined that Lord Lin was still by his side, staying up night after night without sleep, wearing his body down. If this continued, what would become of him?

He followed Su Yang into the imperial study, expecting him to sit listlessly before the desk as usual, staring blankly at the pardon token. But today, Su Yang opened the place where the gifts were stored.

Defu broke into a cold sweat. Lord Lin had taken the gifts that day he didn’t know if they had been returned in time. With the sudden turn of events afterward, he had forgotten all about it.

The cabinet door swung open. Su Yang stared at the empty shelves, his expression darkening abruptly.

Where were they? Where were his things? Where were the gifts Lin Huaiyu had given him?!

Su Yang stood up abruptly, frantically searching every corner of the imperial study. But no matter how thoroughly he looked, he found nothing.

Suddenly, Su Yang turned to Defu, who stood nervously to the side, and demanded in an unfriendly tone, “Where are my things?”

Defu fell to his knees with a thud. “Your Majesty, it was… it was Lord Lin who came earlier. He said he wanted to prepare a surprise for Your Majesty and, not wanting it to overlap with previous gifts, took them to have a look.”

Su Yang pressed further, “When did he take them?”

Defu hurriedly replied truthfully, “It was the day before the sacrificial ceremony.”

Upon hearing this, Su Yang trembled uncontrollably. His heart ached unbearably, and he leaned against the desk, nearly losing his balance.

The day before the ceremony, Lin Huaiyu had taken away everything related to him those things had been burned by Lin Huaiyu’s own hands.

Su Yang sat back down at the desk, gazing at the pardon token lying quietly there as if looking at Lin Huaiyu himself. He dismissed Defu and the others, murmuring to himself, “Lin Huaiyu, are you really this heartless? Even the gifts you gave me had to be taken back, How cruel you are.”

“Weren’t they already given to me? How unreasonable.”

Su Yang gently rubbed the token with his fingertips, not daring to apply any pressure. He feared that the last remaining item connected to Lin Huaiyu might be destroyed by him as well.

Softly, Su Yang whispered, “Lin Huaiyu, come back and scold me. Come back and hit me, or even kill me anything is fine. Just don’t leave.”

He recalled the words Lin Fei had relayed before Lin Huaiyu left all blessings, wishes for national prosperity, and long life for His Majesty. Not a single word from Lin Huaiyu had been meant for him in the end.

Gritting his teeth, he wanted to crush the token but didn’t dare exert any real force, so he ground his molars instead.

He tucked the pardon token into his robes, pressing it against his chest, and made his way toward the Palace of Spring Fragrance.

He reeked of alcohol, so he deliberately drank some sobering soup and changed his clothes before slowly sitting on the bed. Although Lin Huaiyu’s scent had long since vanished from this place, Su Yang still fantasized that one day, Lin Huaiyu would return to his side.

Su Yang did not light the lamp, leaving the room in deep darkness. His figure appeared particularly lonely in the gloom as he sat on the bed, lost in thought for a long while.

He took out the pardon token once more, gazing at the golden plaque in his hand. This was the only thing Lin Huaiyu had left him.

No, it wasn’t even left for him. If it weren’t for saving Zhou Li and the lives of the palace servants, Lin Huaiyu probably wouldn’t have left this token behind either.

At this thought, Su Yang felt he should hate Lin Huaiyu. The other had erased every trace of himself, but what about him? What was he supposed to do?

“Lin Huaiyu, why didn’t you ever think of me?” Su Yang couldn’t help but murmur softly.

“Bai Jianqing said you cared about me, that you had me in your heart, but I never felt it. If you truly had me in your heart, why did you leave me? Why didn’t you leave me a single word? Why didn’t you leave me anything?”

“Did you really not want me anymore?”

Su Yang asked many questions, but no one could answer him. The person he wanted to ask wasn’t here.

He gritted his teeth in frustration. He wanted to find Lin Huaiyu, to have that person stand before him so he could ask in person: Why did you leave? Why did you disappear in such a way?

Why did you abandon me?

Su Yang slowly lay down, placing the pardon token under the blanket and hugging the blanket tightly to his chest, as if this way he could hold Lin Huaiyu. For many days, he had slept like this, yet not a single night had he truly slept.

Sometimes, he hated Lin Huaiyu for not coming to find him, not even appearing in his dreams. But he forgot that he hadn’t even been able to fall asleep.

He was afraid that the moment he closed his eyes, someone would come to tell him that Lin Huaiyu’s whereabouts had been found, and he would miss it again if he wasn’t careful.

He was also afraid of truly dreaming of Lin Huaiyu, of Lin Huaiyu in the dream telling him that he hated him to death.

He knew Lin Huaiyu hated him, but he didn’t want to hear Lin Huaiyu say it out loud.

Su Yang hugged the blanket tightly, alternating between hating Lin Huaiyu and longing for him to appear by his side.

He knew his emotions were particularly turbulent today because of…

those gifts.

The gifts that Lin Huaiyu had taken and burned they were things he treasured like precious jewels. He had hidden them deep in his heart, along with the memories behind those gifts, taking them out from time to time to reminisce.

But Lin Huaiyu had burned all his treasures, as if they meant nothing, even though every single one had been given to him by Lin Huaiyu’s own hands.

Why? How could Lin Huaiyu be so heartless, so easily burning the gifts he treasured, burning the memories they shared?

Why?!

At this moment, Su Yang felt he hated Lin Huaiyu to death.

He hated him so much.

Hated Lin Huaiyu’s cruelty, hated Lin Huaiyu’s heartlessness.

But…

The young Su Yang reached out to take the handmade hand warmer, his face lighting up with a smile. “Thank you, Teacher. I will always be good to you. If you stay with me, you will never feel the slightest chill.”

Grown up, Su Yang, clad in black robes, unfastened Lin Huaiyu’s garments on a bitterly cold snowy night, pushing him down onto the icy ground of the imperial garden, humiliating and tormenting him.

Lin Huaiyu’s body trembled as he cried out, “It’s cold,” but Su Yang only sought to possess him, ignoring the fine shivers that wracked Lin Huaiyu’s frame, shattering his own promises into fragments.

And then there was the jade pendant.

At that time, the crown prince was at odds with him. On the day Lin Huaiyu had schemed against him, the crown prince’s arrow aimed straight for his heart. Unable to dodge in time, Su Yang could only shift the impact away from his heart, but the arrow struck squarely on the jade pendant Lin Huaiyu had given him.

The pendant shattered, yet it was Lin Huaiyu who had saved his life.

Later, Su Yang had the pendant repaired, but the cracks remained.

Time and again, Lin Huaiyu had saved him rescued him from the cold palace, helped him enter the Eastern Palace, and assisted him in ascending to the throne.

What reason did he have to hate Lin Huaiyu?

Su Yang could only clutch a cup that held not even a trace of Lin Huaiyu’s scent, deceiving himself into believing Lin Huaiyu was by his side, yet no matter how hard he tried, he could not find restful sleep.