The Post-Apocalyptic Rival Who Crashed My Wedding with a Baby - Chapter 11

The rest of the Longyu Squad looked equally sickly. The toddler’s dark, bright eyes remained fixed on them, unblinking. This silent pressure made them feel as if a mountain were resting on their shoulders.

Lin Yunxia, ever the gentle soul, was the first to surrender. She let out a long sigh, dipped her chopsticks in water to dampen a thin piece of paper, and stuck it over her cup like a white flag of truce. “I’m so sorry, baby,” she said with a look of profound guilt. “I… I just can’t do it.”

Yunxia wasn’t usually a picky eater, but having witnessed the entire process of creating this “Lovecraftian” feast, she couldn’t bring herself to take a bite.

An Songyu, a staunch advocate for not wasting food, felt his heart drumming against his ribs. As a former police officer, his mental fortitude was high—in a life-or-death situation, he could probably eat anything with his eyes closed.

But now… he blinked, unable to bear disappointing the child. Gathering every ounce of courage, he finally picked up an “eyeball.” As the black sesame paste slowly oozed out, his mind instantly flashed to a zombie’s skull bursting. His mouth opened, and he closed his eyes, trying to shove it in, but his jaw seemed to develop a mind of its own and locked shut.

Watching An Songyu chew on thin air, Miao Jialing sneered, “An Songyu, aren’t you the one who hates wasting food? Why aren’t you eating?”

An Songyu pressed his lips tight, struggling to squeeze out a sentence. “Some food… is meant to be wasted.”

Specifically, food that assaulted a person’s psychological defenses. He looked up at Jialing. “Why don’t you set an example then?”

Miao Jialing was all talk. Seeing the challenge, she immediately stood up. “Cough… I’m actually not very hungry. I’ll go get Little Bai for breakfast.” She turned and vanished before anyone could stop her.

The raven and the black cat traded glances and wordlessly slipped out of the cave together.

Shen Qingyu had anticipated their reactions. She wasn’t annoyed, merely looking at Jiang Weiqing with a calm expression. “Aren’t you eating either?”

The toddler immediately shifted her gaze to Jiang Weiqing. Her little lip trembled, and her eyes turned red, as if a single “no” would send tears cascading down her cheeks.

Jiang Weiqing’s jaw tightened. Her throat bobbed. Finally, she forced a smile that looked more like a grimace. “How could I not? I love this stuff!”

Internally, she was fuming. Shen Qingyu is definitely doing this on purpose. How could she claim this kid’s cooking is ‘good’?

Despite her casual tone, her face was grim. The others looked on with expressions of pure admiration. A true hero, they thought. Off to the gallows.

A sense of tragic desolation rose in Jiang Weiqing’s heart. She hesitated before the three plates, finally choosing the “star-gazing” fish heads as they looked the least terrifying. She picked a small silver fish, popped it into her mouth, and chewed numbly. Then, she flashed an exaggerated grin at the child. “Baby, your cooking is amazing! You’re going to be the best chef in the apocalypse!”

****

In truth, she swallowed it so fast she barely tasted anything. She didn’t want to dwell on the dry, bitter flavor that was nothing like normal food.

Hearing the praise, the child let out a joyful squeal, waving her arms. However, Shen Qingyu’s next sentence sent Jiang Weiqing straight to the depths of hell.

“Since you like it so much, why don’t you finish the rest?”

Shen Qingyu looked at the others. “The rest of us will just have a simple tomato hotpot for breakfast.” Clearly, “the rest of us” did not include Jiang Weiqing.

With a flick of her palm, a bounty of fresh produce and meat appeared. Tomatoes, loofah, green beans, winter melon—all looking as if they had just been plucked from a garden. Tomato base, fish balls, sliced fatty beef, bacon, ham, sliced lamb… all the perfect ingredients for a feast.

Miao Jialing, who had been lingering nearby, heard “hotpot” and came charging back with Xu Bairan. “Fantastic! I love tomato hotpot!”

An Songyu rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. “Qingyu, this much food must be worth a fortune in points. You’re too generous.”

“Don’t lift a finger, Sister Qingyu,” Lin Yunxia added. “Let us handle the prep.”

The sensible Xu Bairan was already washing vegetables, and Little Black flew over, carrying a large iron pot in its beak.

Jiang Weiqing watched them with a twitching lip. “Are you really going to eat all that delicious food right in front of me?”

Shen Qingyu showed zero remorse. “We aren’t hiding it. We’re eating it quite openly.” She glanced at Weiqing. “Besides, didn’t you say you loved the baby’s cooking?”

The child nodded vigorously like a corroborating witness. Jiang Weiqing choked on her words. She wanted to travel back in time five minutes and slap herself.

She hugged the child, rubbing their faces together as she complained, “Baby, do you know what I’m sacrificing for you? A delicious hotpot!”

The child thought Weiqing was playing and giggled. And so, a world where only Jiang Weiqing suffered was achieved. Shen Qingyu watched this from the corner of her eye, a faint, fleeting smile crossing her lips.

Lu Yan shifted into human form, her cat ears twitching as she hugged Shen Qingyu’s leg. “Sister Qingyu, I’m very well-behaved! I’m cute, soft, and I can act spoiled. If you just give me three carps a day, please feel free to ‘keep’ me!”

Since Shen Qingyu was a rare dual Metal and Space Esper with plenty of supplies, Lu Yan had abandoned her human pride to cling to this “Golden Thigh.”

Faced with Lu Yan’s antics, Shen Qingyu declined without blinking. “I already have someone I’m ‘keeping’.”

“Who?” Lu Yan’s cat ears popped out in a crisis of jealousy.

Shen Qingyu didn’t answer, she just looked at the child. Lu Yan followed her gaze and pouted. “How can I compete with the baby?”

Little Black “ga-ga-ga’d” in mockery, despite having had the exact same idea as Lu Yan moments ago. Behind them, Jiang Weiqing chewed her “Lovecraftian” breakfast in silent agony.

******

The tomato hotpot was a resounding success. In three years of the apocalypse, while things had stabilized, fresh food remained a luxury. Even as powerful Espers, they rarely ate this well.

An Songyu patted his full stomach. “I wish every day could be like this.”

“If it were, you’d be a ‘General with a big belly’ in no time,” Jialing teased. Comfort and the apocalypse were rarely found in the same sentence.

“At least it would mean the world was stable,” An Songyu mused.

Jiang Weiqing, meanwhile, had managed to sneak a bowl of tomato soup to settle her stomach. She walked over to Xu Bairan, who was frowning at a notebook. “What’s wrong, Xiao Bai? Stuck on a problem?”

The squad shared teaching duties. Lu Yan and An Songyu were useless with academics, and Jialing had never attended school. That left Yunxia and Weiqing.

Bairan nodded. “Captain, I don’t get these.”

Jiang Weiqing looked at the cover. Elementary Math. She felt a surge of confidence. “Xiao Bai, math at this level is just basic arithmetic. I can do it in my sleep.”

Then she saw the problems:

[Some people believe 6 is a lucky number. There are 150 fruit candies. Create a “lucky number” scheme to distribute them among five people.]

[There are five apples in a basket. You must give each of five children one apple, but one apple must remain in the basket. How do you do it?]

[Twenty animals are in a line for ice cream. The 16th from the left is a rabbit. The 10th from the right is a deer. How many animals are between the deer and the rabbit?]

*****

Jiang Weiqing’s face nearly cracked. This was elementary school level?

“Captain? How do I answer?” Bairan asked.

“Cough… this seems to be… beyond the textbook standard,” Weiqing stammered. “Let me think.”

Yunxia walked over. “Is it hard, Captain? Let me see.”

Jiang Weiqing’s ears twitched. She heard a second set of footsteps—heavier ones. Please don’t let it be Shen Qingyu, she prayed. She turned, and there was Shen Qingyu.

“This… this is easy,” Weiqing lied, sweat beading on her forehead. “I just… forgot a specific formula.”

Shen Qingyu glanced at the page and answered immediately. “Problem three: three kids get 6, two get 66.” (Note: $6 + 6 + 6 + 66 + 66 = 150$). “Sixteen is a riddle; give the last child the basket with the apple still inside. Twenty-five: six animals.”

Shen Qingyu was like a calculator. She didn’t even have to pause.

Bairan’s eyes lit up. “Sister Qingyu, you’re amazing! Better than the Captain! Can you help me with these physics problems too?”

Yunxia was equally impressed. “Sister Qingyu, you’re so smart.”

“Elementary Olympiad math is quite simple,” Shen Qingyu said nonchalantly. Then she looked at Jiang Weiqing. “How did you even get into our university if you can’t solve these?”

Jiang Weiqing felt the critical hit. She had studied her soul out in high school, but she had forgotten it all since. Under Shen Qingyu’s questioning, she felt her dignity crumbling.

“You were the top of the city in physics and math,” Weiqing muttered, trying to salvage some pride. She whistled for Little Black and walked out of the cave. “I’m going for a walk… to digest.”

When she returned, she was carrying a black bag, tied shut. Through the plastic, Shen Qingyu could just make out the word Mathematics.

She let out a soft snort. Jiang Weiqing was still as stubborn as ever.

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