The Moon Upon My Heart - Chapter 11

Chapter 11: A Joke

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The passage of time will not change due to anyone’s will; the holidays would neither arrive early as the students expected, nor would they disappear just to consider the feelings of Shen Wangshu and Ji Fengyue.

As the school days passed one by one, even the annoying cicadas showed signs of fatigue in the scorching heat of midsummer. Finally, before the end of the last class in the morning, the class teacher, Mr. Liu, announced the news of the holiday, and a burst of warm cheers immediately erupted from below the stage.

Mr. Liu chuckled and said a few things about not going into the river to swim at will during the break, not playing too wildly, remembering to complete the assignments set by each teacher, and mentioning that there would be a diagnostic test once school officially started.

The students’ excited moods were doused with a bucket of cold water. Many people immediately wailed with miserable faces. Mr. Liu’s gaze swept over them intentionally or unintentionally—it was those same few boys. He chuckled, clapped his hands, and officially announced the end of class.

The next second, however, those male students who were pretending to wail rushed out of the classroom with their bags, showing no trace of their previous despondency.

Some had even brought suitcases to the classroom; as soon as class ended, they dragged their clattering suitcases and rushed downstairs, leaving the girls in the classroom watching in a daze.

Although the girls were also excited, their movements were much more elegant, leaving in twos and threes with friends. Some were chatting about going shopping together after the break, some were saying they would return to their hometowns to escape the heat, and others said their whole families would go on a trip over the weekend… In short, everyone was very happy, and no one talked about the disappointing matter of studying at a time like this.

Looking at the excited and leaping figures around her, Shen Wangshu felt somewhat lost in her heart. Ji Fengyue kept watching her, wanting to do something, but she could only endure it, and her expression wasn’t very good either.

The two slowly packed their schoolbags and were among the last few to walk out of the classroom. By the time they reached the bottom of the building, the campus was already half-empty. Walking further toward the dormitory, they saw hurried young people pulling suitcases, full of vitality.

Shen Wangshu and Ji Fengyue did not walk fast; moving against the flow of people, they formed a sharp contrast with the others.

“Xiao Yue, you don’t want to go home?”

“It seems you don’t either.”

Ji Fengyue fell silent for a moment and asked a question she already knew the answer to: “Where do you live? In the city district?”

“Yes.”

“Do you want to go to the city library to self-study with me? Or we can find another place. If you use studying as an excuse to go out, your mom probably won’t stop you.”

Shen Wangshu thought for a moment and nodded: “That seems good. My house is in the old city district, quite close to the library. But what about you? Didn’t you say you were from a rural school?”

“Cough, when I was in the third year of junior high, my mom bought a house in the city, but we don’t live there often. She opened a garment factory in another province; there’s no one at home.”

After Ji Fengyue finished speaking, she added at the end: “My parents are divorced. When it’s the holiday, I’m the only one at home.”

“Xiao Yue, if you don’t mind, you can come to my house often. You could even just study at my house.”

This was a completely different situation from her previous life. Shen Wangshu was a bit surprised, but thinking that the point in time Ji Fengyue was reborn must have been much earlier than her own, she realized: having been reborn, Ji Fengyue certainly wouldn’t just be a bookworm. With her experience, pointing the way for a mother trapped in the countryside and domesticity would be very simple.

But this was a matter of course; Ji Fengyue was a person of action. If she wanted to change the family tragedy of her previous life, this was the simplest and most labor-saving method. Shen Wangshu felt a bit of envy in her heart; looking back at herself, she could only sigh.

“I really couldn’t tell; it turns out you’re actually a rich woman.”

“Cough, you can’t really put it that way… anyway, what do you think of my suggestion?”

Shen Wangshu shook her head gently: “We can go to the library, but forget about going to your house.”

“Alright,” although she had expected the reply, Ji Fengyue was still disappointed. “But I welcome you anytime. It would even be fine to stay overnight at my place!”

“There will be opportunities in the future.” Shen Wangshu smiled as if sighing. She had self-awareness; before completely letting go of her feelings, if she stayed alone with Ji Fengyue in a private space, she would definitely be unable to help herself. That was too dangerous, so she absolutely wouldn’t.

The two quickly finished packing the sundries in the dormitory, pulled their suitcases side by side out of the school gate, and got onto the bus home together.

The midsummer sun was truly dazzling; the scorching sunlight penetrated the car windows, making everything inside the bus burning hot. Although the air conditioning inside was operating well, it still made people uncomfortably restless.

There weren’t many people on the bus yet. The two sat down in random seats. Ji Fengyue sat by the window, and Shen Wangshu was beside her. The air conditioning wind from the bus blew down from above none too gently; fortunately, both had brought jackets, so it wasn’t too cold while wearing them.

After a while, many passengers boarded one after another, and the interior became increasingly noisy. Soon the bus departed the station. Shen Wangshu frowned unconsciously; she slowly exhaled and focused her attention on the scenery outside the window.

Ji Fengyue had been watching her out of the corner of her eye. There was a type of fatigue coming from the bottom of the girl’s heart, but it was obvious that Shen Wangshu did not want to vent about family matters.

Ji Fengyue really wanted to help Shen Wangshu, but what could she do? Shen Wangshu never forced her to do things she didn’t want to do, and could only ever pretend she knew nothing.

Just like now, she didn’t know why Shen Wangshu wanted to hide her identity, or why she pretended to be ignorant after hinting at it, but Ji Fengyue could only cooperate.

“What are you thinking about? Your brow is furrowed very tightly.”

Ji Fengyue suddenly snapped back to reality. Seeing Shen Wangshu staring straight at her, she turned her face away uncomfortably: “Thinking about your matters, is that not allowed?”

“Ah… what a coincidence, me too.” Shen Wangshu smiled and leaned gently on her shoulder. Ji Fengyue’s body was very stiff; this was the first time since being reborn that Shen Wangshu had actively shown a sign of dependence.

“Xiao Yue, what’s wrong?”

“Hmm? I’m just a bit sleepy. Fengyue, can I lean on you for a bit?”

“No problem… let me pull the curtain. The sun is too piercing.”

“Yes, thank you for the trouble.”

After the window curtain was drawn, the light in this space dimmed abruptly. Shen Wangshu actually closed her eyes, still leaning on Ji Fengyue’s shoulder. Her breathing soon became steady; it seemed she had already fallen asleep.

Ji Fengyue’s heart was beating violently. She slowly shifted her body so that Shen Wangshu could lean in a bit more. Actually, if she could, Ji Fengyue wanted to hold her; it would surely make her sweetheart sleep more comfortably.

Shen Wangshu hadn’t completely fallen asleep yet. She opened her hazy, sleepy eyes to look slightly at the person beside her.

In the dark space, Ji Fengyue, who was closer to the window, seemed to have a layer of soft light on her face, making the dazed Shen Wangshu—who was also suffering from motion sickness—suddenly feel at ease.

She knew she could completely trust Ji Fengyue. This person was a friend she could rely on; no matter what she encountered, Ji Fengyue would do her best to help her.

How nice. As expected, I still like her very much… It’s so good that the person I liked so much before was her.

It was strange; Shen Wangshu found that she no longer felt distressed at all about the failure of her unrequited love.

She closed her eyes peacefully, no longer recalling the past. She completely relaxed her strength, leaning naturally against Ji Fengyue, and truly entered a deep sleep shortly after.

Ji Fengyue turned her head slightly, gazing at the peaceful sleeping face of the girl on her shoulder, her own eyes softening. She watched quietly for a long time, then took out her phone and quietly captured the fifteen-year-old sleeping face of the girl she loved in her photo album.

But perhaps because of the vibration of the car engine and the unpleasant air inside the bus, Shen Wangshu had a dream that wasn’t very pleasant.

She dreamed of the moment of the car accident in the past; she dreamed of the way Ji Fengyue knelt by the hospital bed after she died, so broken that she couldn’t even shed tears.

What scared her even more was that in the latter half of this dream, Ji Fengyue lived in a way that was almost subhuman, no longer having the appearance of the confident and proud Doctor Ji from before. She left the hospital and stayed in their former home day after day, until one day, she walked to the riverbank…

Shen Wangshu opened her eyes in terror and found herself almost falling into Ji Fengyue’s arms. Ji Fengyue, probably wanting her to sleep more soundly, had intentionally tilted her body and even used one hand to protect her. The calm expression on her face was completely different from the bloodless look in the dream.

It was different; their expressions were completely different… but Shen Wangshu’s tears began to flow unconsciously, dripping onto Ji Fengyue’s body and striking Shen Wangshu’s own heart.

She didn’t dare to think after her death, did Ji Fengyue really become as lost and lifeless as in the dream? Did some accident happen to her too, which is why she was reborn back to the past?

If, if Ji Fengyue really was like in the dream…

“Xiao Yue, what’s wrong? Did you just have a nightmare?” Ji Fengyue immediately noticed the wetness on her shoulder. Turning her head and seeing Shen Wangshu biting her lip and weeping silently, she hurriedly took a tissue from her bag and carefully handed it to Shen Wangshu.

“…Yes, thank you.” Shen Wangshu sniffled gently. She used the tissue to block the sadness on her face, and at this very moment, she felt an extremely strong impulse.

Shen Wangshu really wanted to confess to Ji Fengyue the fact that she was also reborn.

“Can you tell me what you dreamed about?”

But looking at the expression of Ji Fengyue so close at hand, seeing the concern and worry filling her eyes, Shen Wangshu still lowered her gaze and didn’t dare to actually say it.

“I… if I tell you in the future, would you still be willing to listen?”

“Of course, we are friends after all. If you have any troubles, you can feel safe telling me,” Ji Fengyue breathed a sigh of relief. Looking at the girl who was so sad because of whatever she had dreamed, she very seriously gave her promise. “I am willing to listen to your troubles at any time.”

“Although I might not be able to help, I can at least manage to share half of your distress.”

“Ji Fengyue, has anyone ever told you before that you are really good at saying sweet nothings?” Shen Wangshu forced a smile and made a joke that made her even sadder. “Be careful saying these things to me casually, I might fall in love with you.”

“…”

Facing the sudden joking words, Ji Fengyue pushed her glasses uncomfortably. She turned her head and said in a muffled voice: “I’m not like this to everyone.”

“Yes, I know. It turns out I’m the special one. Thank you, I’m very happy.”

Ji Fengyue pursed her lips, not daring to look at Shen Wangshu’s expression, and only after a long while did she whisper back: “Then can you also make me as happy as you…”

Seeing Ji Fengyue’s rare nervous appearance, Shen Wangshu smiled gently. She leaned on the person beside her once more, closed her eyes, and said softly: “But you already are.”

“Someone told me before that I always give off a sense of aloofness and am very cold to everyone, so not many people are willing to take the initiative to approach me, care for me, or want to be friends with me.”

“Deskmate, you’re really strange. You’ve been so good to me since the moment we met.”

“Because I like to; I did it because I wanted to. What’s so strange about that?” Ji Fengyue carefully turned her head. Seeing that Shen Wangshu was leaning against her resting with closed eyes, she finally dared to show an irrepressible smile on her face.

“And you aren’t cold at all. You’re cute everywhere. I like you very much.”

“Deskmate, even if you praise me as a celestial fairy from heaven, I won’t like you any more than I do. Otherwise, what should I do if I really fall in love with you?”

“It’s not just sweet talk to make you happy.” Ji Fengyue’s mood was complex, both happy and a bit sad. She poked Shen Wangshu’s soft cheek and also used a joking tone to speak her true feelings.

“Even if you really fall in love, there’s nothing to worry about. I wouldn’t dislike you.”

“Haha, you’re really narcissistic.” But I would hate myself.

“Then would you hate me?”

Shen Wangshu still kept her eyes closed and shook her head gently: “No, I like your confidence very much.”

“That kind of ‘like’ is enough.”

It was already liked enough.

So I don’t like her anymore. Just like this, it really is enough already.