The Eunuch Is A Heartthrob On A Survival Variety Show [Ancient To Modern] - Chapter 3

Zhang Tongtong followed Wei Yan into the car, and once he got in, the seats were completely full.

“What are you squeezing for? It’s not like they’re stopping you from going,” Damahou complained.

Zhou Youlan glanced at the person beside him, faintly feeling that Wei Yan was following him, though he wasn’t sure if it was just a coincidence.

Meanwhile, Wei Yan sat in silence, looking as though he hadn’t noticed Zhou Youlan’s gaze at all.

Zhang Tongtong raised a hand with an apologetic smile, “Sorry, Big Brother. I just followed the queue right up.”

Zhou Youlan signaled for Damahou to take the next vehicle; there was no point in arguing over a ride.

Seeing that the next car was filled with female passengers, Damahou’s resentful expression instantly shifted. He waved his hand cheerfully, “Fine, fine, I’ll go sit over there.”

Zhang Tongtong turned his head and eagerly started chatting up the star, “Hello, Brother Zhou. I’m Zhang Tongtong. I’ve watched all your movies, and your acting skills are incredible. I never expected to be on a show with you. Please take good care of me, Brother Zhou.”

Zhang Tongtong had debuted from a boy group not long ago and definitely couldn’t compare to Zhou Youlan in terms of industry status, but naturally, he wasn’t going to miss a chance to network with an A-list star.

“Hello,” Zhou Youlan said, shaking his hand back. “I’ve heard your group’s songs. They’re very good.”

“Brother Zhou, you’ve actually heard our songs?” Zhang Tongtong was genuinely surprised, never expecting that a top-tier A-list celebrity would have zero airs and be so easy to get along with.

He had assumed that actors like Zhou Youlan—who projected a tough-guy persona and had genuine achievements under their belts—would look down on singing and dancing boyband idols like them.

Zhou Youlan smiled. “Your group’s songs all have a lot of character, and your vocals are very recognizable. Tag me the next time you release a new song, and I’ll definitely support it.”

Zhang Tongtong’s eyes lit up, unable to hide his excitement. “Thank you for the support, Brother Zhou. Next time we release an album, we’ll definitely invite you to be part of the first batch of listeners.”

The two of them chatted happily, leaving Wei Yan completely left out.

With three men sharing a single row, it was undeniably cramped. Zhou Youlan on the left was already broad-shouldered and strongly built, and Zhang Tongtong beside him kept shifting restlessly, leaning inward whenever they spoke. Wei Yan had no choice but to lean back against his seat just to create a little more breathing room.

Zhang Tongtong then reached out a hand to Wei Yan, “Hi there, what year were you born? Should I call you Big Brother or use your name? Let’s get to know each other. I’m Zhang Tongtong.”

“Wei Yan.”

“Oh, hahaha.” Zhang Tongtong awkwardly withdrew his hand, thinking to himself that this tall, handsome beauty was quite the cold type.

Because of Wei Yan’s silence, the atmosphere gradually cooled down.

Feeling the warmth against his thigh where his clothing brushed against Wei Yan’s, Zhou Youlan uncomfortably pulled his legs back and leaned forward slightly, purely wanting to widen the distance between himself and Wei Yan.

Wei Yan had no choice but to draw his own legs inward as well.

Zhang Tongtong kept playing with the folding military shovel in his hands, swinging it back and forth like a child holding a novel toy.

The car jolted, causing Zhang Tongtong’s body to sway to the side, and the sharp edge of the military shovel swung directly toward Zhou Youlan’s face.

Before Zhang Tongtong could even react, right as the shovel was about to strike Zhou Youlan’s face, Wei Yan timely intercepted the danger.

Before they left, Assistant Zhou had repeatedly warned him: if Zhou Youlan got even a scratch on his skin during the show, five thousand yuan would be deducted; for a minor injury, ten thousand yuan; and if he suffered any broken bones, fifty thousand yuan would be wiped out immediately.

Though the wages the young master of the Zhou family was paying him were quite substantial when converted against the currency of this era, if he were docked a few times according to Assistant Zhou’s words, he would probably have almost nothing left by the end.

Wei Yan smoothly and lightly pulled the shovel out of Zhang Tongtong’s hands and stood it upright beside his leg. Pressing his palm against the handle of the shovel, his face remained expressionless, “Play with it after we get off. It’s not safe in the car.”

Zhang Tongtong’s heart jumped into his throat, and he offered an awkward, bitter smile, “Right, right, right. I’m sorry, Brother Zhou. I didn’t mean to.”

Zhou Youlan didn’t mind at all, speaking in a very breezy tone, “It’s fine, you didn’t hit me.”

Zhou Youlan’s reaction took Wei Yan by surprise. He had assumed that, just as Assistant Zhou described, the young master of the Zhou family—being the sole heir of nine generations and pampered since birth—might not have a very gentle temperament, or at least wouldn’t be this open-minded.

It turned out he had misjudged him.

Zhou Youlan cast a casual glance and noticed that Wei Yan was looking at him.

When he looked back, Wei Yan calmly averted his gaze, as if their eye contact just then had merely been an accidental collision.

Wei Yan’s eyes could be said to be a rare, textbook example of peach-blossom eyes, and set against his face, they were arguably the most perfect match. Yet the ripples in those eyes were as pale as stagnant water—so still that it was impossible to probe any emotion, instead making it easy to get sucked into the silent, black abyss at the bottom of his pupils, which made Zhou Youlan feel somewhat uneasy.

His sixth sense told him that the other man’s earlier approach and the protective action just now felt like they had ulterior motives.

He had come to this variety show because his manager said there was no script and no need to be constrained like on other shows, and that the process was highly challenging and thrilling. He never expected to be latched onto by someone on the very first day.

Zhou Youlan couldn’t hide his emotions on his face. Zhang Tongtong didn’t dare speak out loud, but he kept observing quietly; it was clear that Zhou Youlan didn’t really like Wei Yan.

He tugged on Wei Yan’s sleeve and lowered his voice in his ear, “You’re so bold.”

Wei Yan looked perplexed.

Taking advantage of the fact that Zhou Youlan had turned to the side, Zhang Tongtong whispered, “Judging by you, you must be a newcomer on your first show. You helped me just now, so I’m only warning you.”

“In the entertainment industry, the biggest taboos are newcomers stealing senior veterans’ spots and intentionally trying to hitch onto screen time, and you just did all of them at once.” Zhang Tongtong couldn’t even help wanting to give him a thumbs-up. “Brother Zhou was dragged down in the past because someone tried to hitch onto his screen time. Back then, it turned into a huge falling out with that artist, and they fought a lawsuit for a long time before it settled down. If you’re going to look for someone to hype up with, at least do your homework first.”

“And do you know whose spot you took? The country’s most famous martial arts star! The man has been in the industry for decades with connections spanning every field; even the show’s directors and producers have to show him a few degrees of respect. Just because he stepped down for a few minutes to rest in the middle doesn’t mean his spot is open for you to just step in.”

Zhang Tongtong spoke with earnest persuasion: “Actually, with your look, it’s very easy to get famous. You don’t need to take the infamous-through-hate route; using attention-seeking methods like this will only make it harder to wash your slate clean later on.”

Realizing that Zhang Tongtong meant well, Wei Yan nodded in acknowledgment, “Mhm.”

Zhang Tongtong: “…”

Whatever. He was just being kind-hearted and running his mouth anyway; whether Wei Yan listened or not was his own business.

Wei Yan finally understood a bit more. At the time, only the spot beside Zhou Youlan had been vacant; he had assumed no one was sitting there, but it turned out he had stood in the wrong place, which was why Zhou Youlan’s attitude toward him was so displeased and resistant.

He had no intention of stealing anyone’s spotlight, but for now, the situation truly looked a bit bad.

After driving for ten or so minutes, they arrived at their destination. So far, everyone’s energy levels still seemed quite high.

“Come, come, everyone gather around,” Zhao Guanjun clapped his hands, calling everyone to cluster together.

“I think we should discuss the map route first. Only one person has the map; there’s no way everyone can just blindly grope their way in by themselves. Besides, with so many people in a chaotic mess, it’s better to divide into small groups for management, so everyone won’t run around like headless flies.”

Zhao Guanjun was the eldest present, and basically everyone on-site had grown up watching his dramas. As a nationally renowned martial arts actor, he naturally carried a certain level of popularity and deterrence, so everyone instinctively followed his arrangements.

Beside him, Wang Chunqin echoed supportively, “Teacher Zhao is right. Let Teacher Zhao make the arrangements. With Teacher Zhao here, we’ll definitely make it to the end.”

Though Zhou Youlan looked down on Wang Chunqin’s bootlicking behavior, what Zhao Guanjun said made sense.

He said, “The rainforest is filled with danger everywhere. It will be very troublesome if someone gets separated and has no way to save themselves. Just as Teacher Zhao said, let’s divide twenty people into four groups, five people per group.”

The production team hadn’t required them to act alone; with inadequate supplies, traveling in a huddle was the optimal strategy.

Zhao Guanjun smiled and nodded, “Little Zhou’s words are exactly what I meant.”

Wang Chunqin immediately piped up, “Teacher Zhao, then let me be in your group. I still want to learn a lot more from you.”

“Good, good, good,” Zhao Guanjun said. “Then everyone can automatically assign who they want to team up with, and then each group can elect a group leader. That way it’ll be easier to manage.”

Naturally, everyone chose to team up with people they were familiar with or those who had experience in wilderness survival.

Wang Ren and the others clearly didn’t want to pair up with them. Old Ghost wore a bantering look, “Big brother, should we head out first? By the time this bunch of losers finishes grouping up, it’ll be dark.”

Wang Ren shook his head, “First day. No need to rush too much, so as not to raise suspicion.”

Old Ghost gave Ah Hu a look. Ah Hu remained silent—he naturally only listened to Wang Ren. Irritated, Old Ghost squatted off to the side.

Damahou wove through the crowd and hugged Zhou Youlan’s arm, deeply emotional: “Brother, you and I shall never be separated unto death.”

Zhou Youlan told him to cut the dramatics, and Zhang Tongtong hurriedly squeezed over as well, “Brother Zhou, put me in your group. I’m not really familiar with anyone else.”

“Okay.”

As everyone else was busy grouping up, Damahou pointed at a man standing blankly in place not far away, Ke Feiyang. “Brother, he’s a retired firefighter. Look at his build—his physical fitness definitely isn’t bad. Being in a group with us shouldn’t drag us down.”

Zhou Youlan said, “It’s not an individual competition. What is there to be picky about?”

“What is there to be picky about? Is anyone the same?” Damahou lifted his chin. “Then do you want him?”

Wei Yan had already been lingering near them, just hadn’t stepped into their formation yet. The moment Damahou’s voice trailed off, Wei Yan walked right up and stood beside Zhang Tongtong.

No matter what, only by staying together could he guarantee Zhou Youlan’s safety, so they had to be in the same group.

Zhou Youlan: “…”

“Look at that,” Damahou laughed gloatingly. “And if you don’t pick now, that person is coming over too.”

Niu Xixi was twisting his waist as he walked toward their side, his pace more bewitching than any of the girls present.

He was a beauty blogger who had come to this show purely for Zhou Youlan.

In the gay community, Zhou Youlan was universally recognized as the ultimate top. He possessed a very healthy, sexy tan skin tone, a waist that looked ridiculously capable of endurance, regular and handsome facial features, and chest and abdominal muscles that left anyone salivating.

The show had allocation slots for ordinary applicants, and fans kept egging him on in the livestream to come try and chase him, so he came.

Before Niu Xixi even got close, Zhou Youlan’s nose was already itching from the pungent scent of his perfume.

He quickly kicked Damahou, and taking the hint, Damahou rushed over and yanked Ke Feiyang closer.

“Big brother!” Niu Xixi whined with a coy, nasal voice that gave people goosebumps. “Take me along too! It’s my first time on a show like this, I don’t understand anything at all.”

Zhou Youlan: “Sorry, our group is already full.”

Compared to Niu Xixi, he felt Wei Yan was vastly superior.

At the very least, Wei Yan was like half a mute and wouldn’t emit that kind of coy, cringe-inducing pitch that made people uncomfortable both physically and psychologically. Otherwise, as a straight man, how much suffering would he have to endure?

The smile on Niu Xixi’s face froze as he glared at Ke Feiyang, “What’s this? I came over first.”

Beside them, Ke Feiyang honestly scratched the back of his head; honestly, it didn’t matter to him which group he went to.

But Damahou pulled Ke Feiyang tightly by the arm. “Sorry, he came first. Go find another group.”

Unreconciled, Niu Xixi stamped his foot and cooed coaxingly toward Zhou Youlan, “Big brother!”

He reached out wanting to embrace Zhou Youlan, only to be blocked by Wei Yan.

Author’s Notes:

Young Master: He definitely harbors wicked intentions toward me!

Eunuch Supervisor (Du Gong): .