The Cannon Fodder Dad of Three Villainous Cubs - Chapter 30

Once Ji Yanyan came to his senses, he bristled on the spot: “Daddy is bad, bad! How can you call me a big turtle… wait, what is a ‘big turtle’ anyway?”

Ji Zhixiu held back his laughter: “A big turtle is a tortoise.”

Ji Yanyan’s attention was successfully diverted. He tilted his head: “And how does a tortoise sound?”

Seeing that Ji Yanyan could never grasp the main point and was easily led astray, Ji Sichen couldn’t bear it anymore and reminded him: “A ‘big turtle’ is a way of cursing you.”

When Ji Yanyan heard this, his cheeks puffed up, and he put his hands on his hips: “Daddy, you can’t be like this! There is no animal that sounds like that!”

Ji Zhixiu raised an eyebrow, looking relaxed and composed: “Think about it carefully how can you be sure there’s no animal that sounds like that?”

Ji Yanyan thought about it very seriously for a while, his face turning into a little bitter melon: “Daddy, stop lying to Yanyan; there really isn’t an animal that sounds like that.”

Ji Zhixiu took a step forward, chest puffed out, looking quite proud: “I sound like that! Yanyan is a big turtle, a big bad guy!”

Ji Yanyan: “…”

His lips were pursed so tight one could hang an oil bottle from them: “Daddy, you aren’t an animal.”

“All humans evolved from animals. Haven’t you seen cartoons like that before? Come here, be good, Daddy will teach you a little bit about the history of human evolution.”

How could a mere rebellious child possibly defeat his own father? He was duped again, taking a step forward: “Daddy, are humans really animals?”

“Of course! Humans didn’t just suddenly appear in this world; it took millions of years of natural evolution. Have you heard of hominid apes?”

Ji Yanyan tilted his head, his eyes darting around: “Then am I one too?”

Ji Zhixiu nodded, unguarded.

“Then I can learn to sound like an animal too!” Ji Yanyan huffed, holding back a mischievous urge and shouting at the top of his lungs: “Daddy is bad, Daddy is a big bad guy, a big tortoise!!”

Ji Zhixiu looked incredulously at his suddenly clever son, feigned anger, and pounced on him.

Father and son tumbled into a heap on the sofa. Ji Yanyan was tickled and giggled uncontrollably. His way of retaliating was to sneakily wipe his tears and snot all over Ji Zhixiu’s clothes.

Ji Sichen, watching this childish scene: “…”

He should have felt annoyed, feeling like it was a waste of time and thinking he should turn away, but his feet couldn’t move a single inch.

Although he was a brand-new account with top-tier configurations, never wasting energy on irrelevant matters and devoting all his effort to learning, human energy is ultimately finite, and one gets tired after studying for too long.

He had always been worried about this, never expecting that by pure coincidence, he had actually found the most efficient way to relax.

Watching Ji Zhixiu and the others roughhousing, his whole body felt like it was soaking in warm water very comfortable. The formulas and complex knowledge points lurking deep in his mind also quieted down.

It only took ten minutes for him to recover his vitality and enter his “study mode.”

Ji Sichen interrupted them: “Daddy, can you help me move the books into the study?”

“Of course I can.” Ji Zhixiu remembered the important business, stopped teasing his youngest son, and got up.

Ji Yanyan’s emotions came and went quickly. He had long forgotten what just happened and came pitter-pattering over to help.

One big and two small went back and forth five or six times, finally moving all the books into the study.

Ji Sichen was about to start studying. He politely invited Ji Zhixiu and the others out, his face clearly saying, “You’ve outlived your usefulness; now get lost,” his ruthlessness perfectly clear.

Ji Zhixiu didn’t really care, after all, he was still counting on mooching off his son. Just as he was about to close the study door, Ji Sichen suddenly looked up: “Are you going to keep making noise later?”

Ji Zhixiu froze, tentatively asking: “Is our volume too loud and bothering you?”

Ji Sichen shook his head: “Please, keep making noise for a while.”

“Consider it for my sake.”

Ji Zhixiu: ???

At 4:00 PM, “Chef Ji,” who had been busy all day, finally returned, his hair windblown and his body dragging with exhaustion.

Ji Zhixiu couldn’t help but smile, not wanting to tease him.

Ji Zishen was better at dealing with people than him; at his young age, he already understood how to manage connections.

The class was electing a class monitor by democratic vote. To get elected, Ji Zishen actively participated in after-school activities and worked hard to make friends with every student, vying for their favor.

Ji Zhixiu looked him over carefully for a long time. Beneath Ji Zishen’s tired expression was an indescribable sense of satisfaction he must have achieved significant results.

He smiled and took a homemade fruit drink out of the fridge, handing it to Ji Zishen: “We aren’t eating at home tonight; I’ll order delivery.”

Ji Zishen nodded.

After getting approval from the family chef, Ji Zhixiu dared to call the others. But just as he opened his mouth, he suddenly lost his voice. He frowned slightly and inhaled sharply.

Ji Zishen noticed and asked: “What’s wrong?”

Ji Zhixiu shook his head: “Maybe I’m running hot; I’ve had mouth ulcers for a few days, and it hurts even when I open my mouth wide.”

“Then drink more water.” The universal remedy.

Ji Zhixiu didn’t take it to heart and went to ask Ji Yanyan what he wanted to eat.

He ordered healthy, nutritious meals for the three children, but bought himself a plate of super-spicy crawfish, to the point where he was almost oxygen-deprived from the heat.

Before bed, he felt his throat hurting a bit, but after hesitating for a while, he didn’t take any medicine and just washed up and went to sleep.

The next day was still the weekend, but the family’s biological clocks were well-regulated, so they still got up early to eat.

Usually, when Ji Zishen finished washing up and came out, he would see Ji Zhixiu busy in the kitchen, but this time, the living room was completely empty.

He didn’t think much of it and went to prepare a simple breakfast. The food was set on the table, but there was still no sound from the bedroom.

He vaguely sensed that something was wrong. After hesitating, he pushed open the bedroom door and walked in on tiptoe.

Ji Yanyan’s sleeping posture was indescribable he had gone to bed curled up in Ji Zhixiu’s arms, but in the morning, he was like a little tortoise at the edge of the bed, his pajamas pulled up above his knees. He must have been having a good dream, suddenly opening his mouth to “om-nom” a corner of the quilt and giggling foolishly.

“…” Ji Zishen remained silent for a few seconds, grabbed the small blanket nearby, and covered him with it.

The other side of the bed was quiet. In the dim light, one could only see the arc of the quilt and a lock of black hair.

Ji Zishen walked around to the other side, just about to speak, when he suddenly saw that Ji Zhixiu had a look of pain on his face even in his sleep, and his cheeks were flushed with an unnatural heat.

A bad premonition arose. He pressed the back of his hand to Ji Zhixiu’s forehead.

Hmm…

Diagnosis complete: roughly medium-rare.

Ji Zhixiu opened his eyes in a daze, suddenly seeing three small faces leaning over him it looked exactly like that meme where Tang Sanzang lies on the bed and his three disciples look down at him.

He was stunned for a while. He wanted to ask what they were doing, but not a single sound came out; his throat felt like it was burning.

“You have a fever,” Ji Zishen said, handing him a glass of warm water. “Drink the medicine; you should feel better.”

Ji Zhixiu was dizzy, his whole body achy and weak. It took two tries before he could barely sit up. His throat hurt so much that swallowing was a struggle.

After taking the medicine, he rested for a while and then struggled to get up, but Ji Zishen just reached out and pressed his shoulder, easily preventing him from moving.

Meeting Ji Zhixiu’s anxious gaze, Ji Zishen said on his own: “You want to keep your perfect attendance record, right?”

Ji Zhixiu was stunned. He looked at him with surprise, and it took three or four seconds before he nodded.

Ji Zishen wasn’t trying to show off; he was as mature as if he had carefully considered everything. He took the phone before Ji Zhixiu could: “Leave the livestream to me.”

Facing Ji Zhixiu’s bewildered stare, he continued: “Although I’m not great at livestreaming, I’ll definitely be able to help you keep your perfect attendance record.”

Ji Zhixiu exchanged a look with Ji Zishen, squeezed out a weak smile, and rested in peace.

Ji Zishen wanted to be an adult; the hallmark of an adult is self-reliance and the ability to take on responsibility.

It was just a pity that he didn’t have that capability yet, but Ji Zhixiu had given him the chance to live the life he wanted, so he had to make a return.

Although he didn’t say it out loud, he knew there were three little “gold-swallowing beasts” in the house, and he knew how much pressure Ji Zhixiu was under. They were a family; this wasn’t just to help Ji Zhixiu, but also for himself.

After making full preparations, Ji Zishen suppressed his nervousness, took a deep breath, and turned on the livestream.

Ji Zhixiu’s livestreaming had a top-tier companion effect. After receiving the notification, the “family” (fans) opened the room immediately.

But this time, what they saw at first glance wasn’t the familiar figure.

??? Why is the “Evil Tangerine Head” so short? Why is he a three-head-tall person now?!

Before they could even type a question mark, a tender, childish voice sounded in the room: “Uncles and Aunties, Daddy has a high fever, so I’ll be broadcasting on his behalf today.”

“Daddy works very hard; he has been working very hard to broadcast. He really couldn’t get up today. Could Uncles and Aunties please be understanding and not unfollow? I will work hard to broadcast today, too!”

Hearing this, the fans in the chat felt their hearts melt.

【So cute, so cute, so cute!】 【Don’t worry, baby, Uncles and Aunties won’t tease you we all love you guys! Fairy wands x10】 【Suddenly feeling sorry for the “Evil Tangerine Head.” He always seemed so optimistic and good at thinking up fun stuff raising three kids while appearing more full of life than me but his pressure is actually quite high, supporting the whole family alone. Fairy wands x100】 【Baby, is your daddy okay? Is it serious?】

“Daddy has already taken his medicine and is asleep. I’ll check his temperature again when I return; if the fever hasn’t broken, I’ll take him to the hospital this afternoon.”

Ji Zishen had meticulously observed Ji Zhixiu’s style, thanked everyone for their gifts one by one according to his habits, until his mouth went dry.

Seeing how sensible and well-behaved he was, the fans’ “blood bars” were emptied by the cuteness. Some urged him to go drink water and rest, while others told him to take a break and not thank everyone individually they all understood his heart.

Ji Zishen was very serious. He wasn’t broadcasting just to kill time for attendance; he had already planned out everything that followed.

He took some change from the secret treasury, settled his two younger brothers, and then went out with a small eco-friendly bag: “Daddy is sick; I want to prepare some light food for him.”

Ji Zishen navigated the vegetable market next door with ease, greeting the grandpas and grandmas selling vegetables and even haggling.

The audience in the chat was stunned. They thought that when their father fell ill, Ji Zishen would panic—they were already prepared to comfort him but they hadn’t expected him to be so independent and capable of buying groceries on his own.

【So amazing! I’ve been living by myself for years and I still feel embarrassed haggling with people.】 【Such a small figure giving people a sense of security suddenly want to call him ‘Mom’ orz】 【Is this still Earth? There are actually children this sensible and obedient who know how to buy groceries by themselves!】 【!!! Wait, does he know how to cook, too?!】 【Kid, what color of sack do you like?】

After Ji Zishen finished buying his groceries, he even found time to interact with the chat. It took him a while to guess what everyone meant since his reading vocabulary was limited.

“Thank you, Auntie, for your affection, but I don’t like sacks of any color. I am Daddy’s son, so it wouldn’t be convenient to visit Auntie’s house.” “Yes, I really like buying groceries and cooking. If Aunties and Uncles come to visit, I will be sure to entertain you well.” “The grandpas and grandmas at the market are very kind to me; even if I don’t buy, they give me fruit.” “Haggling is very simple. If Uncles and Aunties want to hear about it when I get back, I’ll tell everyone.”

The tender, childish voice echoed in everyone’s ears, every word and sentence standard—not only cute enough to make people nosebleed, but also well-versed in social etiquette. The “family” in the chat was even more unable to resist; they all started calling him “The Kind-Hearted Tangerine Head” and really wanted to adopt him.

Only one person was special in the chat, using the coolest special effects to say the gentlest things.

From beginning to end, he only sent three sentences.

【Yunian: Is he okay?】 【Yunian: Is your daddy okay?】 【Yunian: Is the ‘Evil Tangerine Head’ okay?】

To get attention and express himself clearly, he changed the form of address three times.

His messages were drowned out in the flood of comments, but over time, the “family” noticed him.

【The “Evil Tangerine Head” has such good luck, to have a “Number One Fan” who cares about him so much.】 【!!! I’m rolling on my bed from the cuteness! He can even resist the cuteness of “The Kind-Hearted Tangerine Head” and only cares about “Evil Tangerine Head.”】 【Although it might not be appropriate, it gives me a huge sense of déjà vu…】 【I understand. He really looks like a loyal husband who is away on business and suddenly finds out his wife is sick, and is rushing around in a panic.】 【Plus one. In my heart, he has already completely integrated into the “Tangerine Head” family, just so anxious that not even a single leaf is left on his head. Doge.jpg】