The Beautiful Pariah Thought He Could Be Loved - Chapter 36

Chapter 36: Xin Qishu Helplessly Hugged His Arms…

With two sharp gazes piercing his back like arrows, Xin Qishu turned around and returned to the mountain where the contestants resided. He pushed open the gate to his small courtyard, but what lay behind the gate was not his dwelling.

A few wisps of clouds brushed past him in the azure sky as the air flowed freely. Ye Qing, dressed in expansive robes, looked at him with a faint smile in his eyes. Every wrinkle at the corners of his eyes betrayed a calculating, veteran mind. “Have you made up your mind?”

The sounds of fighting and cheering drifted up from beneath the clouds.

Xin Qishu had been brought directly onto Ye Qing’s cloud. Each cloud was separated by a thick mist, making it impossible to see the people on the neighboring ones. A thought flickered in Xin Qishu’s mind: Could Lüqing sense his location here?

He immediately abandoned the thought; the spells on these clouds were profound, and he likely couldn’t replicate them.

As expected, Ye Qing had noticed him earlier.

Xin Qishu hadn’t originally intended to meet Ye Qing at this moment, but this maneuver had caught him off guard. He had no choice but to say, “I’ve looked over the manual. In three days’ time, the most I can do is allow Ye Zijing to possess my body.”

“Furthermore, my health is poor and my body carries a heavy amount of Yin energy. I cannot accept the presence of any spiritual artifacts at the scene.” Thanks to the Mirror of the Sea of Sin, Xin Qishu had a lingering trauma regarding identification-type artifacts.

Even now, he could recall the despair of that moment. Back then, he had been able to burst forth with such profound emotion only because he and He Lüqing still had a foundation of feelings. In their current situation, that was impossible.

“One more thing—it’s not a major matter, but the Law Rain Pavilion is very strict with its disciples and does not allow them to practice techniques from outside sects. Our… ‘collusion’ must not be known by others,” Xin Qishu said pointedly.

Ye Qing’s expression remained unchanged.

The events that took place when the Law Rain Pavilion group rested in the small town had not yet spread; few had heard Dan Yu’s instigating words. Who did Ye Qing go to see when he left that day? Xin Qishu was certain it wasn’t He Lüqing.

Like many cultivators in the world, whenever Ye Qing mentioned He Lüqing, his tone was always conflicted—a mix of fear and disdain.

That person wouldn’t be a random passerby; they were among the people the Law Rain Pavilion brought to Xiangjiang this time.

Xin Qishu already possessed the Tree Spiritual Power which naturally carried Yin energy. Without an artifact to test it, how could one be sure the one who came was truly Ye Zijing? Or rather… would a ghost actually possess him at all?

Ye Qing’s smile deepened as he readily agreed: “Of course. Then in three days, I will find a place to invite the Villa Mistress. Don’t worry, if the Master becomes emotionally unstable… I will restrain her.”

The underlying meaning was: You can act, but you’d better think carefully about the extent and content of your performance. Otherwise, you will die.

In that exchange of looks, the cunning of both parties was clearly reflected in each other’s eyes. Whether a ghost would actually descend that day was something both were well aware of.

“I need to verify your current progress.” Ye Qing stepped closer, reaching out toward his wrist. “Are you also well-acquainted with Duan Shi of the Mo Sect?”

“Not well,” Xin Qishu answered quickly, parrying the man’s hand. “Can a person without cultivation like you even verify progress?” In the cross of their movements, he flipped his wrist and pressed his fingers against Ye Qing’s pulse instead.

Xin Qishu’s eyes widened in slight surprise.

Slap!

In a mere instant, his hand was swatted away by an agitated Ye Qing.

But that single instant was enough for Xin Qishu to sense plenty. He stared intently at Ye Qing’s face, his expression hovering between a smile and a scowl. “The steward of Han Shuang Villa… the adopted son of the Villa Mistress… how can your meridians be completely severed?”

“Why would the Villa Mistress adopt a child whose meridians are shattered?”

Up close, the scent of medicinal pills on Ye Qing grew even heavier… unless one was in constant contact with these pills, it wouldn’t be this obvious.

The Taoist had said the night before that those pills were only useful for those with damaged souls. Was Ye Qing’s soul also damaged?

Ye Qing glanced at him with a mix of guilt and vigilance, beads of sweat rolling down his pale cheeks from his temples.

…

Tonight, the moonlight was dim, and mist surrounded the bright moon. A few tiny stars dotted the night sky.

The first day of the competition had ended, and He Lüqing walked toward Xin Qishu’s small courtyard. Xin Qishu had left the arena early today; He Lüqing had only sensed him returning to the courtyard, after which he could no longer detect his presence.

However, he wasn’t coming here tonight to interrogate Xin Qishu. Thinking of the matter that was nearing success, a trace of a smile surfaced on He Lüqing’s habitually frozen face.

Unexpectedly, a group of girls was gathered by the roadside, playing. Han Shuang Villa had planted many flowers along the path; they weren’t precious breeds, just clusters of small blooms, but they were colorful and pleasing to the eye.

The girls had plucked some flowers and were using their nimble fingers to weave garlands for their heads. They chatted idly, their expressions vivid and full of vitality.

By contrast, the bouquet He Lüqing held was more solemn, clearly hand-picked and intended as a gift. Lüqing hesitated for a moment but did not hide his form, walking straight past them.

Being seen with Xin Qishu in the open was one of the reasons he had brought him on this trip.

The girls spotted him and giggled. They held a certain fear for a long-established senior like He Lüqing and didn’t dare speak to him directly, only whispering from a distance, “What is Elder He doing here?”

“The red roses in his hand are blooming so beautifully. Who is the Senior going to give them to?”

“Doesn’t a female disciple from the Law Rain Pavilion live near here?”

“Wow, wow, wow… how scandalous…”

These words drifted into He Lüqing’s ears, causing his footsteps to falter slightly.

This was a truly novel experience, entirely different from the way people discussed him during battles. His heart began to thud with a hint of nervousness—was this what a normal romance was supposed to feel like?

Despite giving Duan Shi an opening, He Lüqing felt satisfied with this journey. He didn’t know how to respond to their words; these young girls clearly didn’t need him to join in to be happy, but he still wanted to say something… for instance, that he was here to find Xin… Han Wan.

The name “Han Wan” brought He Lüqing back to his senses instantly. It felt as if a stone were lodged in his throat, making it painful to move. He couldn’t force that sentence out.

Without a word, He Lüqing walked past them. He could feel their gazes following him, filled with hidden curiosity.

He knocked on the door, his voice carrying an imperceptible tension. “Han Wan, are you there?”

In truth, that was not the name he wanted to call…

He Lüqing felt a pang of regret now, regretting that he had dug such a massive hole for himself. Looking down into the pit, he saw only his grieving self. But there was no other way—should he have let Xin Qishu go back then?

Lüqing imagined that scenario and shook his head; he couldn’t accept it. Compared to never seeing the person again and being completely separated, the current situation was slightly better.

Even from a distance, he could hear the girls’ voices suddenly become excited. He Lüqing thought bitterly that after tonight, at the very least, everyone would know he was involved with Han Wan.

Even if Han Wan was a person who had never existed, the moment Xin Qishu appeared before others under that name, Han Wan was Xin Qishu. To be involved with Han Wan was to be involved with Xin Qishu.

Having barely convinced himself, He Lüqing let out a heavy sigh of relief.

He didn’t wait long. A moment later, the door opened.

Xin Qishu looked as if he had just bathed. His exposed skin was like congealed fat, and his long, wet hair was clutched to one side by a slender hand. He was tilting his head, using a towel to soak up the moisture. His translucent light-brown eyes looked up, giving him a careless glance.

He Lüqing held out the flowers in his arms. Xin Qishu merely spared them a glance before looking away.

Lüqing felt a rare sense of embarrassment. His face flushed slightly, and he instinctively looked back; the girls were staring at him with intrigued eyes. When they met his gaze, they didn’t look away, their eyes shining with the pursuit of gossip.

Lüqing couldn’t take more than a few moments of it. He retracted his gaze and stepped into the small courtyard without the owner’s permission.

The girls watched as his figure gradually vanished into the thick white mist. They couldn’t see anything more and curled their lips in disappointment.

“I’m not interested in flowers. Take them back.” Xin Qishu did not welcome his arrival. His voice was slightly hoarse, carrying a hint of weariness. He stopped looking at him and turned to go back inside.

This indifference caused He Lüqing’s features to twist slightly. One of the flowers in his bouquet was over-bloomed; a single petal drifted down to his feet.

The next moment, He Lüqing stepped forward agitatedly and grabbed Xin Qishu’s arm, his boot trampling the petal into the mud.

At the moment he touched Xin Qishu’s smooth skin, another possibility flashed through He Lüqing’s mind—Is Xin Qishu like this because I am unable to protect him?

As soon as this thought appeared, his heart began to ache with a stabbing pain. There was a very, very deep rift between him and Xin Qishu. He kept trying to cross it to no avail, and he began to examine himself.

When he first held a wooden sword as a child, he too had entertained the drifting thought of wanting to protect someone. But as his cultivation progressed, his understanding of himself deepened. He didn’t have a specific person he wanted to guard; or rather, he wasn’t enthusiastic about the act of “guarding” itself. Consequently, he had never consciously thought about it again.

It was only now that he tried to recall that sincere desire to protect. He began to doubt—he had clearly paid a price, so why did it feel like it was of no use?

Was it that Xin Qishu hadn’t felt it?

Lüqing didn’t know what kind of expression he was wearing. He only saw Xin Qishu wrench his hand away, his eyes full of sorrow as he looked away. Xin Qishu helplessly hugged his arms: “If you want to go crazy, get the hell away to somewhere I can’t see.”