The Aloof Noble Son Feeds His Body to a Wandering Soul - Chapter 7

It was not yet late when Shu Fuyan left his home early.

As dusk settled, a breeze swept across the surface of Bibo Lake, reflecting an orange sea across the entire sky. A small boat bobbed on the water; from a distance, it looked small, like a conventional piece of rockery. Up close, it was quite large, with a high canopy and a slender hull capable of accommodating three to five people without issue.

The sun leaned toward the west, and the horizon darkened.

Mist, like gauze, drifted downward, clouds moved with the wind, light and ethereal.

The boat sailed toward Shu Fuyan and moored at the bank. The boatman stepped off to inquire: “You must be Lord Shu. General Xiao gave orders that you were to board the boat as soon as you arrived.”

Shu Fuyan was startled. Could Xiao Yi have anticipated that he would arrive before the scheduled time?

Shu Fuyan shook his head, subconsciously rejecting this answer.

Xiao Yi and he were not close; the General had no spare time to concern himself with such things. It was likely just a routine order, and Shu Fuyan dared not entertain any delusions.

“Sorry to trouble you, boatman.” Shu Fuyan boarded the boat, stooping to enter the cabin.

The boatman lifted his eyes to look at the sky, estimating the time—General Xiao should be arriving soon.

Thinking that Xiao Yi would be here momentarily, Shu Fuyan felt his heart drumming against his ribs. His lips felt dry, and his exposed skin tingled; he was frantically, wildly excited.

His hands, resting flat on his knees, tightened unconsciously, and he nervously picked at the hem of the robe draped over his lap, caught between joy and restlessness.

Shu Fuyan covered his mouth and coughed twice, struggling to slow his breathing as he sat waiting quietly for Xiao Yi’s arrival.

Seagulls flew high, and the sunset clouds dispersed.

The timing was perfect.

“General Xiao, he has arrived.”

“Mm.”

The voices of the boatman and Xiao Yi echoed outside the boat. Shu Fuyan’s spine stiffened, and his hand, which had been touching his temple, slowly moved to his face; he tapped his cheeks lightly, trying to cool himself down.

“Lord Shu.” Xiao Yi entered the cabin carrying a jar of wine, greeting Shu Fuyan with a smile.

Once Xiao Yi boarded the boat, the surrounding space seemed to narrow. The cold, piercing aura exclusive to Xiao Yi invaded aggressively, as tyrannical and overbearing as a potent love potion taking effect.

Undeniably, Shu Fuyan dared not lift his head to look at Xiao Yi; he was hopelessly bewitched.

As long as their gazes met, his confusion and panic would be exposed to Xiao Yi at a glance.

Shu Fuyan drew a deep breath, pinched his own thigh to force himself to remain sober, and replied with a smile: “General Xiao.”

After taking his seat, Xiao Yi quietly took measure of Shu Fuyan.

The usual, unchanging green robes had been replaced by vibrant, ornate attire, and his face had been powdered. As he leaned closer, he could catch the fragrance wafting from Shu Fuyan—a light, non-cloying scent of rouge that Xiao Yi did not find disagreeable.

Xiao Yi’s gaze moved downward to the slightly upturned, delicate lips. The upper lip was parted slightly, revealing a narrow gap; the flesh was full, red, and glistening. They looked… extremely delicious.

Xiao Yi’s breathing grew heavier, the air he exhaled feeling hot and dry.

He turned his face away, feigning indifference, while internally feeling wretched for his own impulses.

Shu Fuyan was only in his early twenties; it was perfectly normal for him to like wearing powder. What scholar concerned with his appearance didn’t like to use powder? It was purely for the sake of dressing properly, not for his benefit.

Xiao Yi secretly denied the terrifying thought, burying the burgeoning悸动 (heart-palpitation) deep within.

“General Xiao, your face is so red—are you ill?”

Shu Fuyan did not let his thoughts wander elsewhere, fearing Xiao Yi’s health had taken a turn for the worse, and reached out to touch his forehead.

Xiao Yi reflexively dodged, his voice hoarse: “It is nothing.”

Shu Fuyan’s hand hung in mid-air. Personally sensing Xiao Yi’s distance, he pulled a bitter, self-mocking smile from his lips.

Look, when facing Xiao Yi, he had crossed the line again.

Xiao Yi’s senses were sharp, and he perceived Shu Fuyan’s dampened spirits. Since I invited him here, I cannot let him be slighted.

Thus, Xiao Yi poured a cup of wine and pushed it in front of Shu Fuyan.

“Western Region tribute wine, grape brew; have a taste.”

Shu Fuyan was coaxed into a good mood by a single sentence; not being one who usually liked to drink, he picked up the cup and downed it.

One cup was not enough; Shu Fuyan drank three in a row. He tilted the cup to shake out the final drops and smiled: “The General’s wine is truly delicious; I have not left a single drop.”

Xiao Yi smacked his lips. Shu Fuyan is such a heavy drinker? It overturned his impression of Shu Fuyan as a soft, frail scholar.

Xiao Yi snatched the cup from his hand. “Though the wine is good, do not drink too much; it will harm your health.”

Shu Fuyan leaned against the boat wall, his head swimming. “The General speaks truly; I shall listen to General Xiao.”

The boat sailed to the center of the lake. As the evening breeze picked up, the small boat swayed unsteadily.

Shu Fuyan’s body was soft, and having caught a draft on his way here, his already poor constitution grew worse. As the boat rocked slightly, he tilted forward.

“Mm.”

As the hull shifted, Shu Fuyan tumbled onto Xiao Yi. His hand accidentally pressed against Xiao Yi’s hidden place, a throbbing, exhilarating sensation that drew a pleasant, stifled moan from Xiao Yi’s hoarse throat.

“General Xiao.” Shu Fuyan stumbled to stand up. Suddenly, a wave rolled across the lake, and Shu Fuyan fell again. This time, he was caught firmly by Xiao Yi and pulled tightly into his arms.

“My apologies.” A look of self-reproach appeared on Shu Fuyan’s face. “I have caused the General trouble.”

Xiao Yi was just about to tell him to get up when Shu Fuyan began to cough—a violent, hacking cough that shook his shoulders. His body, unable to bear the agony, continued to spasm and writhe. Tortured by his illness and losing control, Shu Fuyan kept burrowing into Xiao Yi’s embrace.

The hand Xiao Yi had raised to push him away paused, then slowly lowered. Xiao Yi seemed to yield; with a resigned sigh, he laid a hand on Shu Fuyan’s back and gently patted it to help him catch his breath.

After a long while, Shu Fuyan weakly raised his head, the corners of his eyes flushed red, his eyelashes dripping like pearls. “I apologize for the unseemly sight, General; my old ailment has flared up again.”

Xiao Yi’s brows knitted deep. Shu Fuyan’s illness is this severe.

Xiao Yi rubbed Shu Fuyan’s shoulder, his movements gentle beyond compare. “Where else is it uncomfortable?”

It had been a long time since Shu Fuyan had felt sincere warmth, yet he had experienced it from Xiao Yi while in the throes of his illness.

Shu Fuyan smiled; his judgment had not failed him. From the very first glance, he had wanted to dominate Xiao Yi.

It wasn’t just because of his appearance or his body, but also his unwavering calm and the soft, tender warmth that Shu Fuyan found so addictively precious.

Shu Fuyan curved his lips, secretly thinking about pulling Xiao Yi into his camp, hiding him away securely, and allowing no one else to covet him.

Shu Fuyan lowered his eyes, clutching his chest, and said in his sickly way: “General Xiao, do not worry; I shall not die.”

Hearing this, Xiao Yi did not agree.

“A human life is but a few short decades, removing the years of infancy and old age, and the years lost to illness—how many years of true life remain? One lives to find joy; if you do not care for your own body, you will hurt those who love you.”

Xiao Yi did not know why he had said these words; he simply did not want to see Shu Fuyan ignore the pain of his own illness.

Those who love you.

Shu Fuyan’s breathing hitched, and he said with difficulty: “General Xiao, no one loves me.”

“You…” Xiao Yi lowered his voice. “Is there no one left in your family?”

Shu Fuyan shook his head, a flash of malice crossing his face where Xiao Yi could not see it.

Xiao Yi fell silent; he should not have asked.

“General Xiao, do not feel guilty; I have endured for so many years, I will not be devastated by a few words.”

Shu Fuyan took Xiao Yi’s hand. “My body is weak; I hope the General will lend me his strength.”

As he spoke, Shu Fuyan leaned on Xiao Yi’s hand, standing up shakily, and returned to his seat.

When the winds calmed, the boatman wiped the sweat from his brow and shouted: “General Xiao, the wind was strong just now—were you startled?”

“It is nothing; continue sailing,” Xiao Yi replied.

Shu Fuyan’s cheeks were flushed; what with the drinking and the coughing, he felt wretchedly uncomfortable. He longed to nestle in Xiao Yi’s arms and beg to be spoiled, preferably to the point where Xiao Yi felt pity and kissed him.

But the timing was not right; he had to wait until Xiao Yi “could not restrain himself” before launching his attack.

Xiao Yi was a man of few words, and because he was silent, Shu Fuyan found no way to open the conversation.

For a time, the two stared at each other blankly.

Shu Fuyan let out a giggle. “General Xiao, you are truly cute.”

Xiao Yi felt his face burn. He, a man, being described as “cute”?

Xiao Yi feigned a profound expression, casting a cold glance at him. “Do you say that to everyone, Lord Shu?”

Shu Fuyan looked deeply into Xiao Yi’s pupils and said solemnly: “Only to you.”

Suddenly, Xiao Yi’s heartstrings trembled like a raging storm snapping the strings of a harp, catching him completely off guard.

“If only there were an instrument here today; I would love to play a piece for you, General Xiao.”

Shu Fuyan relaxed his body, lying half-reclined as he propped his head with his hand, his smile bright and clear.

Xiao Yi listened earnestly, planning to remember to bring the konghou on their next boat ride.

The boat was too narrow, unsuited for Shu Fuyan to lie down completely. Next time, he would change to a larger boat, one where they could both lie down and sleep together.

Lying down to sleep… sleeping together in the same boat…

Images of the two of them naked, entangled in a desperate, intimate embrace, surfaced in Xiao Yi’s mind, burning him until his heart thumped wildly.

Shu Fuyan observed Xiao Yi at every moment, the excessively abnormal blush making him unable to read the General.

Shu Fuyan prided himself on being clever, yet he dared not speculate too much about Xiao Yi.

But Xiao Yi was too abnormal—anyone with eyes could tell he was moved.

Though Shu Fuyan was physically innocent, he was not a naive child who understood nothing. Yet he simply dared not guess in that direction; if he guessed wrong, the price would be more than he could bear.

“I am burning with heat; let me roll up the curtain and catch some air.” Shu Fuyan rolled up the wind-shielding curtain, and the breeze from the lake blew in, the coolness brushing against their faces.

Soon, the flush on Xiao Yi’s face faded significantly.

Xiao Yi exhaled a heavy breath, knowing Shu Fuyan’s excuse was just that, but unable to refute it.

“Lord Shu, a person as good as you deserves to be cherished.” Xiao Yi said from the bottom of his heart.

Shu Fuyan smiled, not offering a rebuttal.

In Xiao Yi’s eyes, he was a good person. But in the eyes of others, Shu Fuyan was an out-and-out villain—vicious and cunning.

As his red robes draped down, Shu Fuyan lay on his side, inadvertently creating folds in his clothing. His waistband slid down, revealing the scent sachet embroidered with begonia flowers.

“You like begonia flowers.” Xiao Yi’s eyes were sharp, catching a glimpse of the begonia red.

Shu Fuyan pulled off the sachet and sat up straight. “The begonia flower is vibrant and beautiful; I like it very much.” He cradled the sachet in both hands with reverence and kissed the embroidered begonia flower on its surface.

Xiao Yi narrowed his eyes, his intuition telling him that the begonia flower Shu Fuyan referred to held a deeper meaning.

“Oh, really? How much do you like it?” Xiao Yi’s voice was sour.

Shu Fuyan did not expect Xiao Yi to grasp the implication, so he straightened his expression and said with the utmost reverence: “Even if the heavens and earth were to crumble, the sun and moon were to lose their brilliance, and the stars were to sink into the sea, my heart would never waver.”

Xiao Yi’s face darkened slightly; he stared quietly at Shu Fuyan, took a cup of wine, and downed it without a word.

“So long as you like it, that is your freedom; no one can interfere.” Xiao Yi drank cup after cup.

Shu Fuyan frowned—Xiao Yi was unhappy.

Just as he was about to offer an explanation, the boatman’s voice interrupted.

“General Xiao, the night is deep; the fireflies are flying everywhere outside—it is a sight of incomparable beauty. Why not come out and have a look?”

“Very well.” Xiao Yi braced himself and went outside.

Shu Fuyan was left in a daze, his lips pale; Xiao Yi hadn’t even invited him to step out together.

Truly heartbreaking.

The night was deep and cool, and the small boat sailed slowly.

Shu Fuyan sat at the bow, Xiao Yi standing behind him, the two of them admiring the same night view.

The bright moon hung high, silver-white light spilling onto Shu Fuyan, the cold moonlight bathing his red robes. It was as if all the dust had been washed away from a worldly treasure, allowing it to shine with new brilliance.

Xiao Yi’s gaze darkened, staring with complexity at Shu Fuyan’s back.

Xiao Yi did not consider himself a man who would compromise; if he truly felt a delusion toward someone, he would have abducted them regardless of their consent.

But mindful of Shu Fuyan’s youth, and the fact that he was already a man who had died, he suppressed his greed. Otherwise, there was no way Shu Fuyan could have been allowed to promise the color of the begonia to another.

Alas, the dead cannot hold onto the living.

The boat reached the opposite shore.

Water grasses swayed along the bank, and fireflies flew low, green light flickering—tranquil and serene.

The boatman stepped ashore, pulled the rope, and tied the small boat.

There were men from the Marquis of Zhenbei estate nearby, and the boatman did not linger, leaving directly—after all, there was no shortage of men by General Xiao’s side.

Shu Fuyan sat at the bow of the boat, his heart feeling cold and desolate. He longed to hug Xiao Yi; he hated Xiao Yi being so icy toward him.

“Lord Shu, the boat has reached the shore; it is time to return.”

Xiao Yi disembarked a step ahead. After a moment’s thought, he did not leave first but reached out his hand, ready to catch Shu Fuyan.

Shu Fuyan dared not cross the line, fearing Xiao Yi would despise him, so he dutifully placed his hand in Xiao Yi’s palm.

“Many thanks, General Xiao.”

They returned home in opposite directions. Xiao Yi should have left, but his mind was constantly filled with unhappiness.

Shu Fuyan bade Xiao Yi farewell and turned toward the darkness.

Xiao Yi watched that lonely, retreating silhouette, and a sense of heartache arose, his breathing becoming labored.

“Shu Fuyan, wait.” Xiao Yi suddenly called out to him.

His feet felt as though they weighed a thousand pounds. A surge of heat flowed through Shu Fuyan’s entire body, and he turned around slowly.

Xiao Yi strode forward, speaking in an awkward manner: “Lord Shu’s skill on the instrument is peerless and rare in this world. Why not come to my Marquis of Zhenbei estate and be a musician? In return, I shall seek a physician to treat your ailments.”

Shu Fuyan stiffened. He didn’t mishear, did he? Xiao Yi wanted to seek treatment for his old ailment.

“You are not permitted to refuse; this is an order.”

Shu Fuyan had not yet recovered his senses when Xiao Yi issued the death-decree, fearing Shu Fuyan would refuse.

Shu Fuyan laughed helplessly—if he became a musician, he could get close to Xiao Yi. Why not?

Shu Fuyan nodded. “Then I shall trouble General Xiao.”

Xiao Yi curled his lips there was no such thing as “trouble.”

So long as he could see him, it was enough.