She Is Such A Jerk, And Yet She’s The One Crying! - Chapter 44

Qiang Ning wished she could drag Jiang Weilan out of the manor and throw him into the wild to feed the dogs; she was so angry her head was practically smoking.

“Sister, listen to my explanation, please…” Qiang Ning chased her all the way home, but just as she reached the door, she was shut outside.

Inside the room, Lin Dongruan appeared calm on the surface, yet her fingertips were trembling uncontrollably. She sat down, clutching her sleeves tightly, looking as though she might break into pieces.

“A-Ning, allow me a moment to be alone and calm down.”

Qiang Ning clung to the doorframe, feeling desperately wronged: “When I was in my fief before, I never did anything out of line. Jiang Weilan is blood-mouthing me and slandering me; Sister, you mustn’t believe his pack of lies.”

Lin Dongruan lowered her head.

Actually, before returning, she had already thought this through. A-Ning’s earlier years had nothing to do with her, and whom the girl chose to know or love was a matter of her own free will; she shouldn’t be sad because of it.

But… the moment she stepped back into the house, she suddenly remembered the instructions of the late Empress Xiaochun. She had promised the woman that she would take good care of A-Ning.

Care.

And yet, she had “cared” for her all the way onto the bed.

This wasn’t how “care” was supposed to be. It was she who had failed to restrain her heart, leading A-Ning to cross the line.

Just now, hearing the Prefect’s words, she suddenly realized that she had wanted too much. Her A-Ning should have been free to choose whom to love without worry, rather than spending every day lowering her posture just to love her.

A-Ning was a Princess of great power and status; in this life, she should have enjoyed the honor of being loved effortlessly. There would be countless people in this world to admire and respect her. No matter how one looked at it, A-Ning should not have to suffer grievances.

In a daze, Lin Dongruan suddenly felt her own excess—A-Ning was still at an age where she wasn’t fully sensible, yet she had used mental schemes and methods to make the girl move her heart. It was an insult to A-Ning.

Doing this was a betrayal of the late Empress’s kindness.

It was her own mistake.

Lin Dongruan gripped her own wrist in distress. Hearing the apologies from outside the door, she felt more and more that she had disregarded the grace of her old friend and committed a grave error.

If the late Empress Xiaochan were alive, she would surely not wish to see her own noble Princess acting in such a manner.

Over this period of time, Lin Dongruan had long lost count of how many times A-Ning had admitted fault, or how many times she had humbled herself and catered to her. Such behavior was not what a Grand Princess of the current dynasty should do; A-Ning shouldn’t have to endure this kind of hardship.

Lin Dongruan’s eyes suddenly reddened, realizing late that she had failed the trust of her old friend long ago.

Outside, Qiang Ning had shouted until she was exhausted, yet she didn’t dare push the door open directly. She could only change her approach: “Sister, are you thirsty? Even if you won’t see me, could you at least let Song Luo in to bring you a cup of tea?”

Inside the room, Lin Dongruan rose desolately and soon opened the door.

Qiang Ning was leaning against the door. She hadn’t expected the other woman to soften her heart so quickly. As the door opened, her posture became unstable… and she intentionally leaned into Lin Dongruan’s embrace.

Lin Dongruan caught her, feeling a sense of debt: “A-Ning, in the future, there is no need to humble yourself like this. You are the highly respected Grand Princess; why must you apologize to me?”

“Huh?” Qiang Ning looked up at her in confusion. “Why should I put on empty airs in front of Sister? Apologizing to Sister is only natural; it’s not being humble or lowly.”

“It was I who did not do well enough before, causing A-Ning to suffer so much, even hitting A-Ning’s palms and making A-Ning apologize over and over.” Thinking of the past, Lin Dongruan felt even more that she had failed the late Empress. After steadying A-Ning, she let go and said, “It won’t happen again in the future.”

This kind of forgiveness was more terrifying than a direct outburst of anger. Qiang Ning sensed something was wrong; her face turned pale, and she asked in panic, “Sister, are you going to abandon me again?”

Lin Dongruan shook her head: “That is not it.”

Qiang Ning: “Then… why are you suddenly like this?”

“The Prefect’s words today woke me up. A-Ning should find a worthy match, rather than wasting time on me,” Lin Dongruan said. “Like the people A-Ning liked before—they certainly wouldn’t be as proud and cold in temperament as I am. You should be loved and revered, instead of…”

“They flattered me and used me, only coveting my power and my appearance. I don’t like them.” Qiang Ning decisively hugged Lin Dongruan’s arm, speaking her heart frankly, “I still prefer being managed by Sister, living this kind of life where someone pampers and cares for me.”

Lin Dongruan was momentarily speechless, not knowing what to say.

Seeing her stunned, Qiang Ning clingily nudged her into the room and closed the door behind them: “I know what I am doing. Sister, you don’t need to worry or fret over me. Whoever I, Qiang Ning, like, and whatever I do, I can take responsibility for it. No one can make me suffer in silence. If I really couldn’t get what I wanted from Sister, I would have left back in Wusang Town.”

It would have been fine if she hadn’t mentioned it, but once she did, Lin Dongruan responded, “But, when we were in Wusang Town, A-Ning did think about leaving, didn’t you?”

Qiang Ning’s thoughts were suddenly exposed. She rubbed the bridge of her nose, left with nothing to say.

“More than once, A-Ning wanted to leave. I knew it all.” Lin Dongruan didn’t hide it from her, simply saying, “If I hadn’t kept you there, those few times, A-Ning would have left, wouldn’t you?”

“That was because… the house in Wusang Town was too hard to live in. Hot in summer and cold in winter.” Qiang Ning found an excuse. “I didn’t mean to want to leave.”

“But, A-Ning,” Lin Dongruan asked, “Do you remember for what reason you chose to stay?”

Of course she remembered.

Qiang Ning looked at Lin Dongruan’s face without much dignity, gazing at her over and over—she thought, of course she had stayed because she craved Lin Dongruan. Every time she had a tantrum, she had to be kissed and coaxed by Lin Dongruan to feel better. If the other woman hadn’t intentionally tempted her, she wouldn’t have been able to stop herself from leaving long ago.

In the very beginning, of course, she was enamored by the other’s peerless beauty and figure. She couldn’t count when it started, but she began to covet more than just those things; she wanted Lin Dongruan’s love and pampered care even more. It was rare for her to suppress her rebellious heart and listen properly to the woman’s management and advice, enjoying her care and instructions.

There was no one else in this world who could make her restrain her temper and lower her posture, except for Lin Dongruan.

To be trapped by Lin Dongruan—she was willing.

“Sister, I have never been unwilling, nor am I a shallow person who only covets your body.” Qiang Ning took her hand and clung to her body. “This is a matter of mutual consent. You are willing to spend the effort to keep me, and I also want to take the opportunity to stay. Don’t blame anyone for doing wrong, and don’t think about these things anymore, okay?”

“A-Ning, many years ago, I was entrusted by an old friend to take good care of you,” Lin Dongruan explained to her. “If that old friend knew I had such a relationship with you, they would probably…”

“What old friend? Don’t worry about that. How many years has that old friend been in the ground? Can they still crawl out of the dirt to manage us? Sister, you have taken care of me very well; there is no need to care about what others say.” Qiang Ning laughed quite immorally. “If that old friend really had any sense, they should be happy for me right now.”

Lin Dongruan: “…”

These words were too rebellious. Lin Dongruan thought of the late Empress’s face and truly could not bring herself to smile.

Qiang Ning pulled Lin Dongruan toward the inner room, acting as if she were relentlessly demanding a treat.

Lin Dongruan stood frozen for a moment, but when she was pulled along, she didn’t struggle much, following Qiang Ning’s lead.

Qiang Ning buried her head in Lin Dongruan’s embrace, her breath warm: “Sister, from the first time we met, I began to crave you. Even if you didn’t intentionally entice me, it would have been very hard for me to stop myself from forcing you.”

Lin Dongruan: “…”

Qiang Ning: “Fortunately, you saw what I meant and followed my lead to entice me. I am very satisfied, more satisfied than I could ever be.”

Lin Dongruan: “…”