She Is Such A Jerk, And Yet She’s The One Crying! - Chapter 35.2

“A-Ning is right.” Lin Dongruan held the reins as she walked with her through the outskirts. A smile of satisfaction, one she had never shown before, appeared on her face. “When it comes to the way of a ruler, A-Ning is very gifted.”

After Qiang Ning finished speaking, she looked toward her and found Lin Dongruan’s smile very captivating. In a daze, she felt as if she were seeing the Imperial Tutor from many years ago—lofty in spirit, noble and gentle. Upon seeing a student’s perfect answer, she would smile with satisfaction, offering affirmation and encouragement.

Soon, Qiang Ning felt a pang in her heart. The jealousy that had been growing within her immediately flared up.

She thought that many years ago, Lin Dongruan must have treated the young Crown Prince the same way, encouraging him, praising him, smiling at him, and patting his head.

Why wasn’t I the heir?

Why couldn’t I be the Emperor?

Qiang Ning had never been particularly interested in the throne, but she didn’t know when her ambition had started to take root. The supreme position now seemed to be behind a thin veil, faintly beckoning to her ambition. From the day she began to harbor designs on Lin Dongruan, she started to feel jealousy and hatred for the person currently sitting on the throne.

She wanted to replace that person. She wanted Lin Dongruan to be her Imperial Tutor alone. All her joy and anger, all her praise and appreciation… even her punishments, must be given to her alone.

Qiang Ning’s thoughts were in disarray. As if bewitched, she shuddered and quickly gripped the reins. The slight stinging pain in her palm woke her from her obsession and allowed her to calm down slightly.

When she turned her head again, Lin Dongruan was reaching out as she walked, stroking the wheat lining the path, looking lost in thought.

Qiang Ning asked, “Sister, what are you looking at?”

“A-Ning, come look.” Following her question, Lin Dongruan brought her closer. “The people of our dynasty mainly plant five types of crops: millet, wheat, rice, broomcorn millet, and beans. What we see before us now is called ‘wheat,’ a common crop in Sanqi Prefecture.”

Lin Dongruan was indeed as knowledgeable as the rumors suggested. Qiang Ning leaned in close and listened intently as she explained how to judge the harvest by looking at the wheat and how to observe the growth during certain months to predict whether this year’s yield would be bountiful.

Qiang Ning took it all in. Once she had learned, she asked: “The harvest won’t be good this year.”

“Drought and floods both occurred within the same month, and during the months when the seedlings were emerging, they were hit by frost.” Lin Dongruan sighed. “Although the people won’t be left with nothing, they will have a difficult time.”

Qiang Ning paused, suddenly realizing something. In the information she had gathered, the memorials those officials sent to the Emperor clearly stated that “the monarch’s grace flows to all under heaven, and the harvest this year is quite good.” This wasn’t just one person; many people wrote their memorials that way… naturally, including Jiang Weilan of Sanqi Prefecture.

Wasn’t this deceiving the Emperor? Why did no one expose it? Why did the monarch believe it?

By the same token, Qiang Ning inevitably began to put herself in that position. She thought that if she sat on that throne, she would certainly not be deceived. Just as Lin Dongruan said—if the other woman taught her these things, she would be able to see these anomalies, she would not disregard the people’s suffering, and she wouldn’t ask a question as foolish as “Why isn’t a single egg worth ten taels of silver?”

Wait, speaking of which… why would Lin Dongruan rather tell these things to her than go and correct the new Emperor?

Qiang Ning had a moment of doubt, but she quickly dismissed it herself—because Lin Dongruan had resigned and lived in seclusion in the mountains not long after the new Emperor ascended the throne. She hadn’t heard a single piece of news about the rubbish things the new Emperor did. If she had known, she would surely be angry.

Since Lin Dongruan was the Imperial Tutor, she must have taught the new Emperor these things. The new Emperor heard them, but they went in one ear and out the other—it was the same as not hearing them at all.

Qiang Ning thought smugly.

Compared to that useless Emperor, she did indeed seem much stronger.

“A-Ning, come, give me your hand.” When they reached a quiet, deserted spot on the outskirts, Lin Dongruan mounted the horse with grace, her sleeves fluttering in the breeze like an immortal.

Qiang Ning hadn’t been paying much attention, but when she turned back, the pure white hem of the other’s sleeve happened to brush against the tip of her nose. The fragrance seeped into her heart, and she looked on as if entranced, doing nothing but smiling.

The white horse trotted in a circle and snorted, stamping its hooves. Lin Dongruan held the reins and reached out to her once more—

Qiang Ning never expected Lin Dongruan, with her cold and gentle temperament, to be able to ride a horse so skillfully. She placed her hand in the other’s and mounted the horse, pretending to be clumsy, and was held securely in front by Lin Dongruan.

She loved horses and admired those with excellent horsemanship. Now, Lin Dongruan’s effortless skill made her feel waves of repeated joy. No one could imagine how breathtaking the scene of Lin Dongruan inviting her onto the horse had been.

Qiang Ning thought that even in her dreams, she couldn’t have imagined anything so beautiful.

Open fields and a smooth path, a beauty and a white horse—and someone who would patiently and gently teach her horsemanship in her ear, ensuring she wouldn’t experience even the slightest bump. Qiang Ning had been wild since she was young; few people had ever given her such gentle guidance and care. All the affection she had missed over the years was being supremely satisfied at this moment.

Qiang Ning subconsciously followed Lin Dongruan’s methods to “learn riding” like a child who had lost her soul, knowing only the happiness of the moment. Afterward, it felt like she had experienced a magnificent and perfect dream.

“A-Ning, don’t be afraid.” Lin Dongruan held her close, pressing her head gently against her chest and lightly kissing her dark hair.

Qiang Ning realized that her long silence had made the other woman think she was scared witless.

“Learning to ride is indeed scary, but with Sister here, I don’t feel any danger at all.” Qiang Ning immediately followed the other’s comfort to act sweet. “I think I’ve learned it. Sister teaches so well.”

Lin Dongruan: “It is because A-Ning is clever and perceptive. In the future, if Sister ever leaves you, you will have Feifei, who can…”

“Where are you going?” Qiang Ning woke instantly from her dream, her face darkening. “Why do you keep mentioning parting?”

“The world is unpredictable; there are always partings.” Lin Dongruan seemed not to catch her meaning and smiled to herself. “Don’t forget, A-Ning, I am older than you. According to the natural order, my lifespan should also end sooner…”

Qiang Ning’s biggest fear was her mentioning leaving. She immediately tensed her body on the horse: “I won’t allow you to say such things. Sister, you are the best doctor in the world; you will surely live a long life.”

“Bringing someone back from the brink of death is only possible because the patient wasn’t meant to die yet,” Lin Dongruan said. “If fate decrees that I die early, how could I save myself?”

Qiang Ning: “You’re talking nonsense. Don’t say such things.”

“If one can grow old naturally and fall asleep forever, that would be fine. I only fear a living separation from A-Ning.” Lin Dongruan did not stop talking. She said, “The war is only temporarily subsided. If the root cause of the hidden danger isn’t removed, the world will eventually fall into chaos. When that time comes, we will have no home to rely on, and I fear we too will be separated.”

“It won’t happen. It won’t happen.” Qiang Ning denied it twice in a row, nearly driven mad by Lin Dongruan’s hypothetical “separation.”

She truly dreaded parting—even the mere mention of it. Something tyrannical seemed to be shouting in her mind. She was worried to the extreme and made vow after vow to Lin Dongruan.

“This situation will not happen.”

“Sister, you will not be separated from me.”

“Gathering and scattering are the way of all things. When the cause arises, the effect follows; when the karma dissipates, it will be the day we part.” Lin Dongruan smiled. “A-Ning, only children believe things in this world are eternal.”

“No matter where you go—to the highest heavens or the lowest depths of the underworld—I will find you.” A surge of pain rose in Qiang Ning’s mind. She gripped Lin Dongruan’s hand tightly and said through gritted teeth, “Lin Dongruan, don’t even think about leaving. Don’t think about it, ever. If you leave me on purpose, I will definitely catch you. Do not force me.”

Lin Dongruan lightly tapped her forehead, taking back all her words as if they were nothing: “I was teasing you, A-Ning.”