She Became Distressed After I Stopped Being Restrained and Started Interacting with Others - Chapter 6

When I got home, only the sound of my own footsteps echoed through the quiet room.

I tossed my bag onto the bed and took out my phone.

—There were no new messages from Honoka.

[“Yuna, aren’t you coming to pick me up today?”]

Just those few words tightened around my chest like a vise.

Normally, I’d reply “I’m coming” right away and rush to see her without a second thought.

But today, I didn’t.

[‘Why don’t you try giving yourself some space?’]

Shiori’s words kept repeating in my head.

If keeping my distance means Honoka won’t suffer—

But is that really the right thing to do?

I love Honoka.

So much that I can’t help but yearn for her from the depths of my heart.

“…Is keeping my distance the right thing because I love her?”

I don’t want to be apart.

If I could, I’d stay by her side forever.

I want to be the only one in Honoka’s sight.

But if that would only burden her—

I sank onto the bed, gripping my phone tightly as I let out a deep sigh.

My fingers moved on their own, opening Honoka’s contact.

“…No.”

If I reach out now, it’ll just be the same as always.

I have to endure.

Because I love her, I have to think about what’s truly best for Honoka.

I squeezed my eyes shut.

But even with them closed, Honoka’s face appeared.

Her troubled smile. Her slightly lonely profile.

That brief hesitation yesterday after school, when I pulled her hand too hard.

—Was I hurting Honoka?

I didn’t want to think about it, but the question clung stubbornly to my mind.

Still gripping my phone, I collapsed onto the bed.

“…This is ridiculous.”

I was the one who decided to keep my distance, yet I can’t stand it.

Just this little separation makes me feel so lost.

So desperate to see Honoka again.

I looked at my phone screen once more.

Honoka’s name glowing on the display.

If I wanted to, I could send “I miss you after all” right now.

But I couldn’t.

“…Shiori.”

Her words echoed in my head again.

[‘I’m watching you carefully, Nanase-san.’]

Those eyes.

Composed yet searching, as if peering deep inside me.

What is Shiori thinking?

Were those words just kindness? Or—

But there’s no point wondering about that now.

Right now, I have to think about Honoka.

I turned off my phone screen and buried my face in the pillow.

What face will Honoka make tomorrow?

What did she think when I didn’t come to pick her up?

Did she feel lonely at all?

Or was she relieved?

My chest tightened.

“…I really can’t do this without Honoka.”

No matter how kind Shiori’s words are,

no matter how much I tell myself to give myself space,

in the end, all I feel is my love for Honoka.

—So, I’ll keep my distance for Honoka’s sake.

I don’t even know if it’s the right thing to do.