She Became Distressed After I Stopped Being Restrained and Started Interacting with Others - Chapter 19

“…I didn’t go anywhere special.”

I hadn’t meant to lie.

But before I realized it, that’s how I answered.

Even though I’d actually gone to the aquarium.

Yet for some reason, I couldn’t bring myself to tell the truth.

‘…I see.’

Honoka’s voice came back after just the slightest pause.

It sounded ambiguous – like she both understood and didn’t understand at the same time.

I tightened my grip on my smartphone.

Regret for having dodged the question so hastily slowly tightened around my chest.

‘So, you were at home all day today?’

Honoka continued her questioning.

Was she suspicious, or just trying to confirm?

‘…Yeah.’

I dodged again.

There was no turning back now.

Silence fell.

That silence felt unnaturally long.

Biting my lip, I waited for her next words.

Finally, Honoka spoke.

‘… Yuna, why didn’t you answer your phone?’

My heart leaped at that question.

‘…I had it turned off.’

I had no choice but to answer honestly.

I could hear my own voice trembling slightly.

‘You had it turned off? Why?’

I gasped at her immediate follow-up question.

I should have known she’d ask for a reason, but I found myself at a loss for words.

Why had I turned it off?

That was—

‘…Were my calls bothering you?’

I thought I could hear Honoka’s voice trembling faintly.

‘That’s not it!’

I denied it in a panic.

But even to my own ears, my voice sounded surprisingly weak.

‘But you suddenly became unreachable. You’ve never done anything like that before, Yuna.’

Honoka’s words pierced through my chest.

She was right. Until now, I’d never avoided Honoka’s contact like this.

And yet, today…

‘…I just needed some time to think.’

I couldn’t properly put my true feelings into words, and I felt like something was stuck in my throat.

Precisely because I hadn’t sorted out my own reasons, all I could give was this vague answer.

But I didn’t know what else I could possibly say.

‘Time to think? About what?’

Her direct question made me feel like I couldn’t breathe.

‘…Have you started to hate me?’

Honoka’s voice was so faint it seemed like it might disappear.

My chest tightened at those words that sounded like they might break off at any moment.

“No! That’s not it at all!”

I found myself raising my voice without thinking.

The words flew out driven purely by the impulse to deny.

But contrary to that forcefulness, the depths of my chest were terribly unsettled.

Honoka’s silence continued.

That quietness only fueled my anxiety further.

I was scared not knowing what she was thinking, what expression she might be making.

‘…I’m sorry. I feel like I’m interrogating you.’

Honoka’s voice grew slightly weaker.

I could tell she was trying to communicate that she wasn’t blaming me.

But her voice couldn’t completely hide the seeping anxiety and hesitation.

‘…I guess having you keep your distance from me hurts more than I thought.’

“…”

‘Even though I was the one who said I wanted freedom…’

I could hear a faint laugh.

But it wasn’t a happy one.

It was an empty laugh tinged with self-loathing – a self-mocking smile.

‘Somehow, I feel utterly pathetic.’

The moment those words reached my ears, I became unable to say anything.

Honoka’s words slowly spread through the depths of my heart.

Even though I was the one who decided to create distance.

Because of that, Honoka was suffering like this.

What should I do?