Self-Perception - Chapter 5

Gu Wansheng almost fled the moment she heard Wen Jinyan speak.

Wen Jinyan stared at the open door before withdrawing her gaze.

Does she dislike kissing? If she dislikes it, then what should I do?

Gu Wansheng sat at the bar and poured herself a glass of water. It wasn’t until the glass was empty that she calmed down.

Oh my goodness, she was actually flirted with and ran away. Why is Wen Jinyan so direct?

Just as she was wondering whether she should go upstairs, Wen Jinyan came down.

“Gu Wansheng,” Wen Jinyan sat across from her, her eyes filled with curiosity. “Do you dislike kissing me? Or do you dislike being intimate with people in general?”

Gu Wansheng choked on her water.

This reaction confirmed some of Wen Jinyan’s suspicions. Wen Jinyan looked serious, placing both hands on the bar table.

“If you don’t like it, I won’t do it again in the future.”

“Have you dated anyone before?”

“Huh?” Wen Jinyan was confused by the unexpected question.

“No. You are the first person I’ve been with.”

“Then… do you really like kissing?” Gu Wansheng tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

“I just wanted to try and kiss you.”

The intensity of that statement was no less than a confession.

Gu Wansheng cleared her throat. Wen Jinyan took the kettle and refilled her glass.

“Is your throat uncomfortable?”

Gu Wansheng took the water and vaguely brushed off the question, her eyes glancing over her shoulder at the sliding door behind her.

Wen Jinyan’s eyelids fluttered slightly, and she rubbed her hands on the bar.

“So, what is your answer?”

Do you reject intimacy with people, or do you dislike kissing me?

She had circled back to the same question.

“I don’t reject intimacy with you, it’s just that what you said earlier caught me off guard,” Gu Wansheng sat up straight, carefully choosing her words. “Don’t you… feel shy?”

“Shy?” Wen Jinyan’s tone curved. “Why should I be shy?” Her tone made it sound like the most natural thing in the world.

Kissing her marriage partner the moment they returned to the room, and saying such revealing things. Even though they had just gotten married, why did she show no sign of shyness at all?

Compared to her, Gu Wansheng felt reserved and subtle, even though she was relatively knowledgeable about lustful matters and had personally satisfied herself before.

In front of a younger person, as the older one, she couldn’t back down. Since the person involved wasn’t worried about it, why should she be so awkward?

Having figured things out, Gu Wansheng relaxed her brows. She propped her chin on one hand and looked at Wen Jinyan with a smile. “Did you want to kiss again just now?”

“Of course.”

Upon hearing this, Gu Wansheng stood up and walked over to Wen Jinyan, looking down at her from a commanding height.

The skin on her palm was delicate and soft, and her small face could be gently held with just one hand. Her knuckles pinched Wen Jinyan’s chin, forcing her to look up, revealing a pair of amber colored eyes.

“Nearsighted?”

“Mhm.”

“What’s your prescription?”

“Over four hundred.”

“Gu Wansheng, why aren’t you kissing me yet?”

“Then I’ll take your glasses off first.”

The two women spoke simultaneously. Gu Wansheng took off her glasses without them, the amber colored pupils were smoother and brighter.

She leaned in, and Wen Jinyan clearly saw the exquisite face slowly enlarge in front of her, the skin on the side of her nose pressing together.

Gu Wansheng sucked on her lip bead, grinding it gently, occasionally licking it, but never reaching inside. She only sampled the surface.

So, this is what kissing feels like? Gentle licking of the lips, a tingling sensation, and the occasional light, painless nibble on the lip bead.

Wen Jinyan committed the feeling to memory. When they separated, a faint silver thread linked their lips.

Gu Wansheng wiped her mouth with her hand, staring at the lips that had been moistened by the water they were rosy and somewhat full.

Did I use too much force just now?

“How do you feel?”

“So, this is what kissing is like,” Wen Jinyan touched her lips, where a lingering warmth remained.

“It feels good, but is that the only extent of it? I see in Western TV shows that they kiss so passionately that they can barely breathe.” Wen Jinyan objectively analyzed the experience afterward, making a mental note to write it down in her journal later.

Gu Wansheng silently thought to herself: No, there are much more intense ways, but I just haven’t used them on you.

“That’s just for television effect. You know the Western style the scale is usually quite large.”

Wen Jinyan lightly said “Oh,” and continued to stare at Gu Wansheng. “Then, are we going to kiss again?”

“I still have to go to the company.”

She had to tell Sister Shang about her marriage. Otherwise, if Sister Shang found out she wasn’t informed immediately, Qiu’s salary would probably be in jeopardy.

“Okay.” Wen Jinyan watched Gu Wansheng go upstairs and took out her phone to record her feelings from the kiss.

When Gu Wansheng came back down, she had applied light makeup, making her look fresh and elegant. It made Wen Jinyan pause in surprise makeup truly could change a person.

The last time, at the bar, she had heavy makeup, giving her an aggressive, vibrant look now, with light makeup, she looked more natural, like a pure white lotus untainted by mud.

“Something just occurred to me. Do you mind if I make this relationship public?” Gu Wansheng asked.

“I don’t mind,” Wen Jinyan replied without hesitation.

“After the public announcement, some people might try to dig up your past information, your background, and your origins,” Gu Wansheng reminded her.

Wen Jinyan lowered her gaze, seemingly lost in thought. After a moment, she looked up and asked, “Will going public benefit you or hurt you more?”

“Benefit,” Gu Wansheng replied after a moment of consideration.

“Then go ahead and make it public. I have deleted my Weibo account, so they won’t be able to find my information.” In other words, she was personally safe.

Did she delete her Weibo because she couldn’t handle certain things? Or was it for another reason?

“Okay, I understand.”

“I’m heading out. There’s food in the living room cabinet. Wait for me to come back.”

Wen Jinyan watched Gu Wansheng leave, then picked up her phone to call Su Muqing.

Gu Wansheng arrived at the company, and the artists she passed all congratulated her. She smiled faintly and went straight to Shang Yi’s office.

“Sister Shang.”

“Did you have fun in France?” The woman in her thirties sat in her chair, drinking coffee, her head still down when she heard the voice.

“It was pretty good. The company should consider France for its next team building trip abroad.”

“Then why didn’t you rest at home? Why come find me? You still haven’t liked any of the scripts I’ve given you recently.”

Gu Wansheng smiled as she walked to the edge of the desk, taking the red book out of her bag and placing it on the table.

Shang Yi’s eyelids twitched when she saw it, and even her head started to hurt. She rubbed her temples, suppressing her anger. “When did this happen?”

“We got married today.”

Married today!!!

Shang Yi’s knuckles, holding the fountain pen, audibly cracked. She took a deep breath. “Do you know what this means for you when you’re in the middle of your rising period?”

“I know. It means I have to go public, and I’ll need Sister Shang and the PR department to put in some effort.”

Gu Wansheng preemptively said everything Shang Yi was about to say, leaving Shang Yi speechless.

“I’ll have the PR department prepare the draft. Let me know in advance when you plan to go public.”

“Thank you for your concern, Sister Shang. This is a small item I saw in France. I thought it suited you, so I bought it back.” Gu Wansheng placed a gift box on Shang Yi’s desk.

Shang Yi scoffed. “You’ve mastered the art of borrowing flowers to offer to the Buddha. Go on, get out of here.”

“Please go easy on Xiao Qiu, too. She’s a sensitive girl.” Gu Wansheng said this and gently closed the door behind her.

“Are you the worm in my stomach?”

Shang Yi was dialing Meng Qiu’s number.

“Hello, Sister Shang?” The voice on the other end lacked confidence.

“Do you know why I’m calling you?”

“I have a slight idea.”

“You’ve been by Gu Wansheng’s side for so long. Why didn’t you tell me she had someone she liked?”

“I only found out today too…”

“When she got married, why didn’t you try to stop her, do some ideological work, and get her to calm down?”

“I also only found out today that Sister Gu was going to the Civil Affairs Bureau…”

Shang Yi: “…”

“But Sister Shang, I have a candid photo of Sister Gu’s partner. Do you want to take a look?”

“I’m not her mother, why would I review it? She’s so good looking herself, how could her taste be bad?”

“Alright, alright. Keep taking good care of her. I’m hanging up.”

Meng Qiu, far away in her own home:

Sister Shang didn’t scold me? Sister Shang didn’t fire me? That’s great!! The Bodhisattva must have been watching over me.

Gu Wansheng, the ‘Bodhisattva,’ was currently sitting in her car, taking a photo of the red marriage certificate and posting it to her Moments feed.

[Married. proud.jpg happy.jpg]

Friend 1: [What? Today isn’t April Fool’s Day!]

Friend 2: [In the industry or out of the industry?]

Friend 3: [I suspect you’re lying to me, unless you show us a picture of your wife.]

Friend 4: [You hid it well! You didn’t even tell us you had a girlfriend, and now you’re announcing the marriage!]

A call came in, the caller ID reading [Bai Jin].

“Hello.”

“What’s with the Moments post? Did you really get married?”

“Do you want me to drive over and put the marriage certificate in front of you so you can see it?”

“You haven’t even dated anyone, and suddenly you’re telling us you’re married? Who would believe it? What’s really going on?”

“I really haven’t dated, but I really am married. Besides, being married doesn’t stop me from dating, does it? Can’t I marry first and then fall in love?” Gu Wansheng switched the phone to her other hand.

“In the industry or out? Do we have any mutual friends who know her?”

“Out of the industry. You probably don’t know her.”

“Out of the industry! Then how beautiful must she be to catch your eye? Do you have a picture?”

“Yes.”

“Send it over, let me see.”

Gu Wansheng sent the picture of the marriage certificate cover to Bai Jin.

“She is good-looking. If she entered the entertainment industry, she could gain a wave of fans with that face. Is your wife interested in the entertainment industry?”

“I don’t know. We have a contractual marriage.”

“Contractual marriage?! Then are you still going to announce it publicly on Weibo? What if… I’m not doubting the strength of your marriage, but a contractual marriage… you don’t have an emotional foundation… you know what I mean, right?”

“I know. But since we’re married, I should give her a legitimate status. There are already plenty of people online creating fan shipped couples. Even if it’s a contractual marriage, I have to give her a name, otherwise, how unfair would that be to her?”

“As long as you know what you’re doing. Are you considering taking on a role? I happen to have a script here a dual female lead theme.”

“Send it to me, but let me be clear, I need to rest for a few days first, and I won’t accept anything I’m not interested in.”

“Fine, you’re the boss. But you have to save a spot for me. The ones who look for you later will have to line up after me. I’ve already saved this lead actress role for you.”

“You’re the only one who pressures me as soon as I return to the country.”

Gu Wansheng chatted with her for a few more minutes before hanging up. She then opened her WeChat chat interface.

[Gu Wansheng]: Sister Shang, have the PR department prepare now. [Sister Shang]: Post it. We’ll handle the rest.

On Weibo:

Gu Wansheng: I’m a person with a family now. happy.jpg

Attached was the cover of the marriage certificate.

Major entertainment headlines followed suit:

[Star Season Entertainment Headlines]: @Gu Wansheng Teacher, congratulations! May you have a hundred years of harmony. Gu Wansheng: I’m a person with a family now. happy.jpg

[Bai Jin]: @Gu Wansheng. A hundred years of harmony! Remember to ask me for a red envelope. It expires soon. Gu Wansheng: I’m a person with a family now. happy.jpg

[Wan Sheng Entertainment]: @Gu Wansheng, congratulations to Teacher Gu on winning the heart of a beauty. Wishing the two of you a hundred years of harmony and happiness. P.S. (Teacher Gu, please treat us to wedding drinks!)