Secretly Liking Him - Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Gu Xun’s emotions truly were manifested too obviously; his eyes stared round and rolling as he looked at Shen Yanzhi, his face visibly growing red as one watched.

Shen Yanzhi truly wished to pretend not to see it but had no way; he put down the water drank to the half point, looking toward Gu Xun with confusion: “What’s wrong?”

Gu Xun only then with a thousand kinds of reluctance shifted away his line of sight, saying as if humming: “Nothing…”

Inside his heart, however, it was frantically brushing the screen, ah ah ah ah ah!!! A-Yan drank his water ah!!! Absolutely true and certain ah!! He himself had only just drank it ah!!!

A piece of Gu Xun’s young boy’s heart at this moment entirely was about to explode, pu-tong pu-tong madly leaping, leaping even more violently than just now when playing ball.

Shen Yanzhi, however, watched Gu Xun’s earlobes red until about to drip blood; toward this sentence of ‘nothing’ of his, that was not believing a single bit.

And then he took a look at the water in his own hand, becoming deep in thought.

Gu Xun by himself over there was excited for a long time because of a tiny bit of small matter; waiting until the time he snapped back, he discovered Shen Yanzhi still held that bottle of water.

Gu Xun swallowed a mouthful of saliva, exerting effort to pretend as if not much caring to ask: “That what, do you still drink?”

Shen Yanzhi shook his head, handing the bottle back to Gu Xun.

Gu Xun became even more excited, feeling his own hand was about to shake; and then he, with careful and cautious care, facing the bottle mouth that Shen Yanzhi had drank from, drank a small mouthful.

He felt… mineral water was so sweet… just like having honey blended inside…

Gu Xun felt this action of his was so perverted ah, but he couldn’t resist ah…

He, returning back, wanted to write a diary ah ah ah!

Shen Yanzhi just watched him, with a red face, bit by bit, drink that bottle of water entirely clean; drinking up to the final moment, he unexpectedly even revealed a tiny bit of an extremely reluctant-to-part expression.

Shen Yanzhi, seeing it in his eyes, suddenly emitted a sound to call him: “A-Xun.”

Gu Xun instantly was just like having done some matter and being caught, looking over toward him startled like a small animal.

That answer which Shen Yanzhi hadn’t understood last night, suddenly all spread open in front of him.

Gu Xun seemed to be…

Liking him.

Shen Yanzhi’s heart, because of this thought, fiercely leaped one blow; his brow subconsciously wrinkled up.

Gu Xun, turning over, just saw Shen Yanzhi wrinkling his brow at him, instantly feeling very anxious: “Wh-what’s wrong?”

The expression on Shen Yanzhi’s face had already recovered calmness; he said: “Don’t drink too much water all at once, it’s not good for the body.”

Gu Xun took a look at the water in his own hand which had already met the bottom, letting out a cough: “That what, a bit thirsty, haha-ha… haha…”

Gu Xun himself all felt his own tone truly was awkward to the utmost; he didn’t dare to go look at Shen Yanzhi, deeply fearing being seen out a tiny bit of something.

Shen Yanzhi also indeed still was looking at him; he repeatedly pondered that possibility which already basically could be confirmed, unable to speak clearly what kind of feeling it was inside his heart.

Disliking?

Seems like not having.

Happy?

Seems like… having a tiny bit.

Shen Yanzhi’s brow again knitted up, not very much understanding this kind of state of mind of his own; Gu Xun liking himself, this fundamentally was not a matter worth being happy about.

But what was strange was, he truly was a bit happy.

Shen Yanzhi felt this was a bit dangerous; this, to Gu Xun, was unfair.

Right, exactly unfair.

Because as long as Gu Xun didn’t speak it out, he probably would take it as himself forever not knowing this matter.

But thinking of Gu Xun because of liking him, only then wanting to work so, so hard, wanting the two people to be able to stay together all along, Shen Yanzhi just felt it was very unfair.

A portion of true heart, should not be treated this way.

Gu Xun should encounter a better person, should encounter a person who could seriously respond to this affection.

Shen Yanzhi drew back his line of sight, saying with a calm tone: “Today I want to go back once.”

Gu Xun blanked for a moment, only then realizing Shen Yanzhi spoke of the small Western-style building over there, so asked: “Ah? Returning back to water the flowers?”

Within this one month of time Shen Yanzhi also had returned back a few times, all taking-taking things, helping to water flowers this kind, none of it very much delaying matters.

Shen Yanzhi gave an “um” sound, only then as if unthinkingly adding: “Also need to prune a bit, inside the rooms also need to sweep a sweep, might need to live there.”

Gu Xun originally still didn’t much care; hearing Shen Yanzhi wanted to live back there, even if perhaps only for one night, he didn’t want to separate just like this.

Therefore Gu Xun immediately then said: “I am together with you ah, pruning flowers or whatever I also know how ah! I’ll be your under-hand assistant, I tell you this matter I do it quite familiarly, at home my mom always directs me.”

Not knowing why, Gu Xun just particularly feared Shen Yanzhi would not promise, ji-li-gua-la saying a big pile of words.

Shen Yanzhi with one look at him like this, knew that his own thought of wanting to separate temporarily for a bit was somewhat not quite mature, because he basically could find zero reason to refuse Gu Xun.

Hence just mixed-up-and-muddled like this, the two of them went from the ball court to the small Western-style building over here.

Gu Xun then particularly consciously went to take the shears, asking: “Pruning all these?”

Shen Yanzhi took a look at the outside, compared to the morning time being a bit sun-baking sun, let out a sigh, saying: “This is not busy, first help me go organize the books.”

Gu Xun obediently put down the shears again, following together with Shen Yanzhi inside.

Speaking of it, although having come several times, yet Gu Xun actually hadn’t much strolled inside the small building, so when seeing this study room which was large to a bit frightening extent, Gu Xun was a bit blank-minded.

Gu Xun swallowed a mouthful of saliva, his gaze sweeping across the books which were somewhat sky-covering-and-earth-blanketing, asking: “A-Yan, how many of these have you read?”

Shen Yanzhi: “Haven’t read all, just about the appearance of one fourth.”

Even if just one fourth, Gu Xun also felt it was more than the books he himself had read since starting to recognize characters; inside his home there were just a few model extra-curricular books, the remaining entirely were issued by the school, quite a few he hadn’t even flipped through.

Gu Xun once again recognized the gap in the middle of him and Shen Yanzhi; A-Yan, he was not only just having a smart brain.

And then Gu Xun asked: “How to organize?”

In his view, they all were well-placed inside the bookcases, quite a few also having zero places needing organizing.

Shen Yanzhi said: “Re-arrange them according to categories, when sent over it was made a bit messy.”

This work actually was optional, but having all come, Shen Yanzhi also couldn’t entirely overturn the words he spoke before.

He didn’t quite want to let Gu Xun discover, that he himself before was just looking for an excuse, wanting to separate from him only.

Gu Xun: “Uh… can you speak a bit more concretely?”

Gu Xun fully exposed the fact of his own having no learning and no skills, because this classifying or whatever, he truly had zero train of thought, and furthermore inside there were still so many books, he looked but couldn’t even read and understand them, how to divide ah!

How about still going to prune flowers and forget it?

But this way it would be like A-Yan one inside the room, one outside the room… and furthermore book pages are quite heavy!

Gu Xun felt this batch of strength of his truly couldn’t be wasted, hence he directly said: “Whatever you say, I move!”

Next the two of them moved all the books down from the bookcases; Gu Xun watching all the books piled together, only then had a deeper recognition toward the actual quantity, truly just looking at it made his juhua (butt) tighten.

And then Gu Xun started thinking, should he also expand a tiny bit of extra-curricular reading materials?

Just, this kind of a bit high-end, otherwise he always mixes inside good words and beautiful sentences, how to have a common topic with A-Yan ah!

Gu Xun subsequently then took an original text book out; good fellow, basically didn’t recognize it, although words could be read and understood, yet connected together what meaning it was, he was blank-minded.

Gu Xun pointed at a line of characters inside and asked Shen Yanzhi: “A-Yan, what meaning is this sentence ah?”

He actually also wasn’t pointing randomly; mainly inside these words, there was a “love”.

This word made Gu Xun unable to resist taking two more looks, and then his opening just was “love is a sweet…” instantly inside his heart just was a sweetness, what was written behind he didn’t care about, wanting to first cheat Shen Yanzhi to read a sentence to him before talking further.

Shen Yanzhi leaned over to take a look, and then fiercely raised his head to look at Gu Xun, wanting to see whether he in the end was unintentional or intentional.

Gu Xun smiled like a fool: “What meaning ah?”

Shen Yanzhi by his smile was made a bit weak; he inside his heart couldn’t resist letting out sighs for Gu Xun, how could he choose so coincidentally.

Shen Yanzhi for an instant, truly had a thought of whether to cheat-cheat Gu Xun, but the next moment, he himself negated it.

Ultimately he only with a level-and-smooth tone read the original text of that sentence once: “Love is a sweet pain, and sincere love never follow a bumpy road”

“The meaning is ‘Love is a sweet pain, and sincere love is never a smooth road.'”

Shen Yanzhi observed Gu Xun’s expression, continuing: “Written by Shakespeare.”

Gu Xun’s inner heart, however, was deeply touched by this sentence; he felt Shakespeare truly was cultured, writing casually and directly writing out all of his feelings.

Was it not a sweet pain.

Gu Xun secretly looked at Shen Yanzhi, and then inside his heart supplemented: still sweetness is a bit more.

If saying there was any pain, probably it was that A-Yan was too outstanding, he wanting to catch up to walk together with him, truly was so tiring.

And then Gu Xun inside his heart tze-tze-ed twice, sighing with emotion that this love road of his was more than just not smooth, it also was a ni-ma (freaking) crooked (crooked/gay) road.

Shen Yanzhi just watched Gu Xun, after knowing the meaning of this sentence, have a moment of blank staring in his expression, and then reveal a smile, that shallow dimple on his face also showing out.

He didn’t very much understand what Gu Xun at this moment was thinking about, hence pretending not to care asked: “How do you view this sentence?”

Gu Xun hadn’t expected Shen Yanzhi would ask himself this; although being a bit strange, yet still said: “Just very right ah.”

Shen Yanzhi continued to manifest his own query: “Very right?”

On Gu Xun’s face revealed a huge smile: “Wanting to be together with the person one likes, how can it be that easy ah, but…”

He looked at Shen Yanzhi, his smile restraining a tiny bit, saying: “But being able to like a person, itself just is a matter that makes people feel very sweet.”

And then Gu Xun suddenly was startled awake to something, let out a cough twice, hurriedly adding an explanation: “Look ah, Xiaosong and Juntao these two right now how happy ah…”

Shen Yanzhi interrupted his words: “All are empty joys.”

Gu Xun’s heart suddenly pained a blow; he looked at Shen Yanzhi’s calm-faced expression, subconsciously replied back: “Can’t speak this way…”

He refuted with very no strength, also not knowing how he should strongly and powerfully go refute this sentence.

As if indeed all were empty joys, yet such empty joys, all were that much making him happy.

Shen Yanzhi was like casually chatting with him: “Liking an impossible person, is not only walking an unsmooth road; the start might feel sweet, but the final pain should be even more.”

Gu Xun was silent for a long time, only then saying: “A-Yan, wait until you also like a person, probably you will understand.”

Shen Yanzhi didn’t resist, almost escaping the mouth out: “Then what about you?”

Gu Xun took a look at him, his eyes squinting into lines from smiling, natural and open-and-aboveboard: “Me ah, as long as he doesn’t dislike me, I’ll be happy la!”

As long as you don’t dislike me, I’ll be very happy la!

At this moment, Gu Xun finally thought clearly, what on earth he before was fearing.

Fearing to the point that he even didn’t dare to go think of this question.

He thought, what he feared was not that one day finally Shen Yanzhi would be together with a certain someone who was not him, fearing how good Shen Yanzhi would be to that person.

What he feared was once piercing open this layer of window paper, they would no longer be friends.

He wouldn’t even have the qualification to stay by his side as a friend; he feared being distanced by Shen Yanzhi, being disliked by him.

This only was the matter he most feared.

Gu Xun thought, as long as being able to stay by Shen Yanzhi’s side just was very good; no matter liking him with what kind of identity, to Gu Xun all was a kind of happiness.

Not bitter and painful, this was sweet.

What matter is there, that is happier than liking Shen Yanzhi, than loving Shen Yanzhi? Have no more, won’t have anymore.

Wu, Gu Xun inside his heart himself supplemented a bit, if rigidly needing to say there was, probably it was that A-Yan also liked him right.

Gu Xun, for this thought of his own, foolishly rejoiced up, smiling just like a cat that had secretly eaten fish.

Shen Yanzhi didn’t know what he was smiling about; he only felt very sad.

He couldn’t resist raising his hand to rub Gu Xun’s head; the hair strands at fingertips were soft-soft, furry-furry, as if not quite matching Gu Xun’s personality, yet conversely surprisingly very harmonious.

The action on Shen Yanzhi’s hand, couldn’t resist again softening by several fractions, as if fearing to startle something.

Gu Xun looked toward him, only to hear Shen Yanzhi say very seriously: “A-Xun, you definitely must like a person who also likes you, this way there won’t be such a thing as disliking you.”

Gu Xun hadn’t expected Shen Yanzhi would with a straight face speak such naive words to him, instantly having an impulse to squirt out laughing.

What kind of words were these ah! A-Yan unexpectedly also could speak this way without passing the brain?

But the next moment, he very much wanted to say, he also wanted to ah.

But how could the matters in this world be so coincidental ah.

Gu Xun then inside his palm rubbed-rubbed his head, saying with a cheerful smile: “Mutual encouragement, mutual encouragement!”

And then he with extreme exaggeration sighed: “I all can’t think out what kind of person would not like you ah! Handsome guy, you truly have occupied a big advantage!”

Shen Yanzhi didn’t know how he should receive these words, only shifting the topic saying: “Organize first.”

Gu Xun gave an “oh” sound, yet conversely never opened other books again; he truly feared a segment of soul impact coming again.

The two people cooperating together, although books were very many, yet the organizing progress still was quite fast; the main one moving the brain was Shen Yanzhi, he with one glance knew where things should be placed toward, so the efficiency was particularly high.

Waiting until finally all were finished, Gu Xun couldn’t resist sticking his waist to admire their labor fruits, sighing with emotion: “Tze-tze, too beautiful.”

Shen Yanzhi looking at his happy appearance, just felt he himself had thought of matters somewhat too simply.

In the end… what to do to be good?

Was it needing to speak clearly to him, or continuing to pretend as if knowing nothing?

Smart as Shen Yanzhi, right now all couldn’t untangle a train of thought.

Gu Xun took a look at the time, and again touched his belly: “A-Yan, let’s go back to eat food.”

Shen Yanzhi gave an “um” sound, just taking one step ahead to walk out.

Gu Xun then followed by his side, the frequency of steps all being consistent with his, every step exactly stepping on the same beat.

When Shen Yanzhi discovered this point, he couldn’t resist going to look at Gu Xun’s face.

Gu Xun had zero awareness, still with a cheerful smile asking him: “After finishing eating food do we still come over? The flowers haven’t been pruned yet, or come again tomorrow?”

Shen Yanzhi drew back his line of sight, saying in a soft voice: “First not pruning, feeling right now the sky is still too hot, easy to prune them broken.”

Gu Xun anyway toward pruning or not pruning all had zero opinion; hearing him say so then nodded his head, and then started muttering saying: “When coming out in the morning I saw the fish my mom bought, inside the kitchen it was marinated well; wait a bit definitely there’s some to eat, just don’t know whether eating sour vegetable fish or what, I want to eat the sour vegetable one…”

Shen Yanzhi then patiently listened to him speak, from time to time responding with a sound.

A road originally was not long, very quickly also was finished walking.

Because of the holiday relationship, Shen Lan and Gu Jingyuan at this moment were both at home; the two of them returned a bit late, Shen Lan and them already having eaten first.

Spying Gu Xun and them coming in, Shen Lan then stood up, opening the mouth just being complaining that they returned late: “Just growing body ne, not eating food well how can it do, quick both go wash hands, I’ll go heat it up for you.”

Gu Xun then with a playful face pushed Shen Yanzhi together to go wash hands, also not forgetting to speak to his mom: “Mom! Don’t make it too hot ah! Otherwise eating still needs blowing cool!”

Shen Lan didn’t even pay heed to him, directly entering the kitchen.

Gu Xun entered the washroom then made a ghost face, saying to Shen Yanzhi: “Just now it should have been you speaking, my mom definitely would pay heed to you.”

Shen Yanzhi’s action of preparing to squeeze hand soap paused, only then saying: “Auntie to me is polite.”

Gu Xun leaned over also to squeeze hand soap; the result was all at once squeezing too much, smoothly wiping once onto Shen Yanzhi’s hand, only then saying: “Where ah, my mom that is from the launch of the inner heart liking you, wishing you were her blood-born to be best.”

Although the words were spoken this way, yet Gu Xun had a single bit of envy, jealousy, and hatred expression none; conversely, he was happy-and-jolly, as if Shen Lan particularly liking Shen Yanzhi, to him also was a matter extremely worth being happy about as if.

Shen Yanzhi, however, in the bottom of his heart welled up a sense of guilt; if letting Auntie Shen know, Gu Xun liked himself…

Shen Yanzhi’s brow again wrinkled up, inside his heart as if pressing a block of stone heavy.

Gu Xun from the mirror saw Shen Yanzhi’s expression, finally in the end didn’t resist, asking: “A-Yan, are you in a bad mood?”

Shen Yanzhi flyingly smoothed his brow, as if nothing were wrong asking back: “Why speak this way?”

Gu Xun actually also didn’t know how he himself just suddenly asked this way, saying very honestly: “Feeling.”

Probably this just was the state when liking a person; as if a tiny bit of fine-branch-and-minor-detail performance, all could be infinitely magnified inside the heart.

Although Shen Yanzhi’s emotions all along were hidden very well, as if what wind blow and grass move all didn’t exist, yet Gu Xun just could feel, A-Yan seemed not quite happy.

Not only because of that frown accidentally bumped into just now; he just from the heart could feel it.

Gu Xun didn’t know how he should open and explain to him, only able to clumsily comfort: “Uh, I also don’t know why it just is this feeling, but…”

Gu Xun looking at Shen Yanzhi said: “But, I want you to be a bit happier; think about it, happy also is one day, unhappy also is one day, definitely must pass it toward happiness…”

Gu Xun himself all felt these words of his truly were dry-and-hollow, but vocabulary quantity was too small, inside these good words and beautiful sentences it also didn’t teach how to comfort people ah!

But just such a clumsy sentence, yet made Shen Yanzhi’s heartstring vibrate, feeling just like an ice-sealed lake surface, suddenly being broken open a mouth.

He himself could not describe that kind of feeling, but that feeling undoubtedly was very good.

Gu Xun felt that the regular words of comforting people stored inside his own brain had thoroughly announced exhaustion, hence moving his head over, onto Shen Yanzhi’s shoulder rubbed-rubbed: “Here, divide a bit of my happiness to you.”

The corners of Shen Yanzhi’s mouth uncontrollably turned upward; he looked toward Gu Xun, and then said: “Sweat is all wiped onto my body.”

Gu Xun: “Uh… this is an accident…”

And then Shen Yanzhi lightly laughed: “A-Xun.”

Gu Xun still was looking at that tiny bit of un-dried sweat stain on his clothes playing fool, saying in his heart he himself simply made a big death, how could he well go toward A-Yan’s body wipe sweat; caught unawares hearing Shen Yanzhi call him, thinking he this was very minding, having a bit of uneasiness moved-moved: “What?”

Shen Yanzhi looked at him, saying very seriously: “Thank you.”

No matter what, thank you for liking me.

Gu Xun as soon as hearing he didn’t mind that tiny bit of sweat he wiped up, instantly then put down the burden, saying open-and-happily: “No need for thanks! This happiness of mine is a lot la! If you want it, give it all to you!”

Shen Yanzhi turned back his face, carefully washing his hands, slowly saying: “Divide me a bit just is good, the remaining you store well; wait until I want it, you then give it to me.”

Gu Xun in a split second just felt these words truly were sweet; he felt he himself probably was inside a lover’s eyes entirely being sugar, whatever A-Yan spoke to him he couldn’t resist rejoicing.

Clearly having no laugh point, he all could by himself brain-supplement out a lot.

He moved his hand over together with Shen Yanzhi’s squeezed under the tap rinsing water, saying with a cheerful smile: “Um um, I definitely will store particularly, particularly much!”

Shen Yanzhi turned his head to look at him, exactly glimpsing that small dimple, couldn’t resist thinking, perhaps maintaining the current state just is very good.

Perhaps doing nothing, letting him just like this go on being happy, just is very good.