Resisting Arranged Marriages: Starting with Myself - Chapter 23

After not closing his eyes for several days, Ye Jiming was nearly incoherent while washing up. As his tense nerves briefly relaxed, he fell asleep almost the moment he hit the bed, even forgetting to turn off the light.

Despite this, he still woke up on time the next morning, tidied himself up meticulously, and prepared to leave for work. The project that had come to a standstill felt like a massive fishbone lodged in everyone’s throat. Whether to push forward or abandon it remained a point of unresolved contention. At such a critical juncture, Ye Jiming could not be absent.

Surprisingly, Le Xiao woke up almost at the same time, contrary to his usual habits. The small figure was huddled inside the thick duvet, leaving only a pair of eyes exposed to quietly watch Ye Jiming busy himself.

“Why are you awake so early today?” Ye Jiming asked while tying his necktie in front of the mirror, watching Le Xiao tenderly through the reflection.

“I cannot sleep anymore,” Le Xiao’s voice carried the rasp of someone who had just woken up, sounding somewhat clingy and sweet, like he was acting spoiled. “Are you leaving now?”

Ye Jiming smiled helplessly. “The work is not finished yet, Xiao Xiao.”

Before leaving, he walked over to Le Xiao’s side, knelt down, and said softly, “Xiao Xiao, the company has run into some trouble. It is a project in collaboration with T University that has encountered difficulties. I really do not want to say this, but solving this problem will indeed take a lot of time.”

“I am the CEO and an expert in this field. I was also the one who made the final decision on this collaboration. In all fairness, I should stay at the company and stand together with everyone, right?”

Le Xiao did not speak, only nodding his head gently.

“In the coming period, I might be like I was recently, unable to answer calls promptly, working late into the night, or even staying overnight at the office. Since you will be home alone, remember to eat your three meals a day on time. Do not wait up for me at night, okay?”

“I am not a child anymore; you do not need to worry,” Le Xiao said with a smile.

Hearing him say this, Ye Jiming’s eyes wavered slightly.

“My Xiao Xiao is being wronged,” he said, kissing Le Xiao’s forehead and leaving a small patch of warm moisture. “Once things are resolved, I will take a long vacation to be with you, okay? Wherever you want to go, whatever you want to do, I will be with you.”

Hearing these words, the corners of Le Xiao’s lips curled into a shallow arc as he smiled and said, “Okay.”

“Are you not in a hurry? Go quickly; I will get up in a little while,” he urged in a low voice. “Focus on your work with peace of mind; do not worry about me.”

Ye Jiming looked at his palm-sized face, felt a sting in his eyes, and leaned over to cover Le Xiao’s lips, sharing a long, lingering kiss. Then, he strode out of the bedroom, disappearing around the corner like a gust of wind.

While speaking and kissing, he had been so focused on gazing into those star-like eyes that he failed to notice the skin around them was more swollen than usual.

Once Ye Jiming’s figure disappeared from sight, Le Xiao immediately rolled out of bed and lay on the bedroom bay window, waiting quietly. He showed no intention of “getting up in a little while” as he had just claimed.

Two minutes later, Ye Jiming’s car slowly drove out of the garage, turned smoothly, and headed toward the community entrance. As the shadow of the car gradually vanished from view, Le Xiao’s heart felt as if a small piece of it had collapsed, leaving it empty.

He patted his face, trying to stop himself from overthinking, and walked barefoot across the floor toward the bathroom.

Having just experienced work abroad and a long trip, the entire team was somewhat exhausted. Le Xiao had simply given everyone time off to let them recover their energy at home. With this break, he also became idle. When he had inspiration, he would sit at the piano with a notebook to write a few songs. When he had no inspiration, he was like a college student on a long break, eating, drinking, watching television, and scrolling through his phone at home, feeling very leisurely.

However, unlike the ease of a college student, there always seemed to be a shadow in his heart, pressing down heavily and making it difficult for him to breathe. While eating, while playing, and even during intervals of creation, he could not stop himself from thinking of Ye Jiming.

What was he doing now? Was he tensely writing code? Or was he in a meeting with others, discussing strategies and brainstorming? Had he eaten? Had he rested? When would he come home?

For several days in a row, Le Xiao seemed unable to concentrate on anything and lacked interest in whatever he did. There seemed to be a nerve in his brain that, as if out of control, was tangled around the other side of the empty air, tangled around Ye Jiming. Any slight twitch could make him tremble with fear and worry.

It had also been several days since that morning goodbye kiss, and Le Xiao had not even seen Ye Jiming’s face again.

Often, Ye Jiming did not come home at all, staying at the company day and night. On a few nights, he returned quietly, silent as a night breeze, to wash up in the hallway bathroom. He would lie down gently behind Le Xiao after the latter had fallen into a deep sleep and then leave hurriedly before dawn. Le Xiao could only determine that he had been back the previous night by the messy bedding beside him, the lingering warmth on the pillow, and the faint scent of cedar in the air.

These past few days had brought rare good weather for early winter. The afternoon sunlight poured in through the floor-to-ceiling windows, casting a thin layer of reflection on the black walnut floor. The dust motes in the air appeared and disappeared in the sunlight, floating irregularly like slow sea waves, light yet heavy.

Le Xiao curled up lazily on the sofa. This should have been a very comfortable position, but he felt as if he were sitting on pins and needles, constantly tossing and turning. A boring soap opera on the television acted as background music, but he did not even care what the plot was.

In the cavernous house, the air felt like a sweater soaked in a lonely glacier, becoming heavy and gradually shrinking, tightening around him until he could not breathe.

Unable to stay on the sofa any longer, he simply got up and paced aimlessly through the large home. From the living room to the dining room, from the kitchen to the study, from the master bedroom to the bathroom, he was like a young animal trapped in a maze with no exit, making a futile final struggle.

Even worse, no matter where he walked, Ye Jiming’s figure would involuntarily surface in his mind.

They would be sitting on the living room sofa watching a program, with Ye Jiming’s fingers unconsciously twirling a strand of Le Xiao’s hair to play with.

He would be holding a knife and fork, patiently helping Le Xiao cut his steak into small pieces while listening to him ramble about his daily routine, his gentle gaze frequently turning toward him.

He would be wearing a shirt and an apron, standing in the kitchen preparing tonight’s meal, the mismatch of his attire radiating a touch of warmth.

In the ergonomic chair, he would be staring at rows of data on the computer, his focused expression possessing a different kind of sexiness.

In the bathroom, two figures would stand before the mirror together, each with a toothbrush in their mouth and a mouth full of white foam, their eyes meeting in the mirror as they shared a smile.

In the bedroom, under the warm quilt, the two would nestle close together, holding each other’s waists while whispering secrets, naturally sharing a long kiss when the passion deepened.

But when he returned to his senses again, the rooms before him were empty. The past sweetness had turned into the mists of yesterday, completely dissipated.

The words spoken before the departure that morning still echoed in his ears. Ye Jiming’s eyes had been close at hand, the eyes behind the lenses shimmering with a slight dampness. His voice had been gentle and low as he whispered: “Once things are resolved, I will take a long vacation to be with you, okay? Wherever you want to go, whatever you want to do, I will be with you.”

Once things are resolved, he comforted himself silently. Once things are resolved, they would return to how they were before, accompanying each other day and night, being intimate and inseparable.

But when would things finally be resolved?

The doubt and longing in his heart were like a sponge soaked in water, expanding every single day. He tried to suppress himself, but the sponge swelled until it burst through the entire house.

It cannot always be like this, he told himself secretly. Ye Jiming had more important things to do. Ming Kong was the result of his many years of hard work and his lifelong ambition. Le Xiao could not be petty about this matter and put Ye Jiming in a difficult position.

But how much longer did he have to wait?

One day? Three days? A week? A month? A year?

How long could he wait?

Would he have to keep waiting like this? Waiting for a return date with no definite answer, waiting for a vague and illusory promise?

He was nearly being driven mad. Longing was like lake water smelling of fish, submerging him through every opening, filling every gap in his lungs until he was nearly suffocated.

What frustrated Le Xiao even more was that he seemed to be becoming increasingly unable to leave Ye Jiming in a physiological sense. He was becoming increasingly unable to do without Ye Jiming’s pheromones.

In the beginning, it was merely on the nights when he kept watch over an empty room, feeling lonely and unable to sleep. After tossing for the sixth time on his side of the bed, Le Xiao finally had to sit up, sighing heavily against the sparse moonlight in the room.

The pheromones in his body were like a rushing torrent, crashing against the shore and clamoring for the scent of cedar. He took a few deep breaths and lay back down in the covers.

However, it was still to no avail. After turning and tossing repeatedly, he finally could not take it anymore and rolled over to the side where Ye Jiming usually slept. Wrapping his arms around the soft pillow, he buried his entire face into it and took a deep breath, capturing the last trace of cedar fragrance remaining in the fabric and the pillow core.

The rushing torrent was relieved in an instant, as if a flood-control dam had been quickly built within his body. The scent of cedar surged in through his nose, followed his windpipe into his lungs, flowed into his blood, and was transported to every limb and bone. It was like an invisible giant hand gently stroking along his spine, soothing the unbearable heat and restlessness in his body.

Holding Ye Jiming’s pillow, he fell into a dreamland after a short while.

Initially, Le Xiao only thought this was the result of longing during the honeymoon phase. However, he gradually began to notice that he was unconsciously running toward Ye Jiming’s territory. He, who originally liked to nestle on the living room sofa for long periods, had started going to the second-floor study in recent days, often staying there for an entire day.

Every corner of the house was set with cedar aromatherapy, the fragrance filling the air. With every breath, the scent of industrially manufactured fragrance surged into his nose, but it was far inferior to the fresh scent of pheromones. Le Xiao’s nostrils flared as he tried to satisfy his thirst with illusions, comforting himself that it was better than nothing.

Perhaps his heat was coming? He was a bit unsure. His heat had never been very punctual, and this situation, craving an intimate partner’s pheromones on the eve of his heat, had never happened before.

Probably, he just missed Ye Jiming too much. He quietly comforted himself in his heart. Probably all Omegas were like this during the honeymoon phase; he was certainly no exception.

But when would this kind of longing, this craving for pheromones, finally reach its end?

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