Pretending Not to Love You [Entertainment Circle] - Chapter 35

Chapter 35

Xiao Baijun looked at Zuo Qiu’s face, which was almost on the verge of tears, and felt bad. He stopped talking to Dai Ni and sat quietly beside Zuo Qiu, keeping him company as he pondered.

Dai Ni talked for a long time before realizing that Xiao Baijun had closed his eyes and was completely unwilling to pay attention to her. She lowered her voice and pleaded with Xiao Baijun: “I’m really cold now. Can you ask my assistant to get me a cup of hot water?”

Before Xiao Baijun could say anything, Zuo Qiu snapped out of his thoughts, stood up abruptly, and said, “I was just about to go to the restroom. I’ll tell your assistant for you,” and hurried away.

Dai Ni looked at Zuo Qiu’s retreating back in surprise, then looked down at the thick towel that had fallen to the floor and the steaming thermos cup that hadn’t been touched. She muttered to herself, “I didn’t ask you to go. Aren’t you cold?”

It was cloudy today in M City, and the temperature was around $25^circ text{C}$ or $26^circ text{C}$, much cooler than in B City. Normally, wearing a short-sleeved shirt and long pants would be fine, but not when your clothes were completely soaked.

Dai Ni turned to look at Xiao Baijun, only to see his sharp eyes fixed on Zuo Qiu’s retreating figure. She was surprised. Just as she was about to say something, she saw Xiao Baijun get up, pick up the towel on the ground, and walk in the direction Zuo Qiu had disappeared.

…

Zuo Qiu first found Dai Ni’s assistant, relayed Dai Ni’s request, and then found a quiet spot to lean against a wall and space out. Earlier, he was only thinking about escaping that suffocating place and hadn’t felt the cold, but now that he had calmed down, he felt cold all over. The icy clothes clinging to his body made him feel like he was immersed in cold water.

Zuo Qiu hugged his arms to keep warm. The next second, a white towel was placed around him. He looked up at the suddenly appearing Xiao Baijun, but didn’t say anything.

Xiao Baijun didn’t speak either, just stood with Zuo Qiu for a moment.

“Let’s go. It’s too cold here. You won’t be able to stand it.”

Zuo Qiu followed Xiao Baijun back silently, his head bowed. He looked at Xiao Baijun’s back, wanting to ask him about Dai Ni, but held back.

Throughout the afternoon, whenever Dai Ni wasn’t filming, she would approach Xiao Baijun, trying to strike up conversations, which annoyed Xiao Baijun immensely. Dai Ni didn’t care about Xiao Baijun’s cold face and continued trying to seek attention.

Director Zhao leaned over to Zhao Zhixian and said, “One is the daughter of the station director, the other is the young master of an entertainment company. A strong marriage alliance.”

Zhao Zhixian glanced at Director Zhao. “You talk too much.”

Director Zhao laughed: “I talk a lot, but it’s all true.”

Zhao Zhixian ignored Director Zhao, cursing him in his heart for not knowing anything.

Zuo Qiu, standing not far behind the two, kept his head down, his expression unclear.

…

After the day’s filming ended, Zuo Qiu first went to Teacher Xiang’s room to ask for her feedback.

Teacher Xiang was very meticulous in her teaching. She created a chart of all of Zuo Qiu’s issues and discussed them with him one by one. Zuo Qiu was not formally trained, so he had many problems. Previously, on the set of The Fledgling, he had the guidance of Director Gong, who taught him every gesture. Zuo Qiu hadn’t noticed the issues then. Now, on the set of I Think I Love You, which was a long TV series, Director Zhao wasn’t as strict about many details and often let the actors improvise. It was then that Zuo Qiu realized he had significant issues. Except for the first scene, Zuo Qiu was stopped many times today. Teacher Xiang’s explanations now were highly beneficial to him.

As the two were teaching and learning, there was an abrupt knock on the door. Zuo Qiu put down his pen and went to open it.

When he opened the door, it was Xiao Baijun… and Dai Ni. Dai Ni seemed to have been saying something and was looking at Xiao Baijun, who remained expressionless.

Zuo Qiu’s eyes dimmed slightly.

Seeing the door open, Dai Ni turned, smiled, and greeted Zuo Qiu: “Zuo Qiu, hi. I heard from Zhao Zhixian that you were having a make-up class here, so I was curious and came to check it out.”

Zuo Qiu forced a smile. “Come in. The class is still going on.”

After Xiao Baijun and Dai Ni entered, Zuo Qiu offered the single sofa to Dai Ni and sat directly on the carpet. Xiao Baijun sat next to Zuo Qiu. Seeing Xiao Baijun sitting on the floor, Dai Ni abandoned the sofa and sat down right next to Xiao Baijun.

Xiao Baijun glanced at Dai Ni with distaste.

Dai Ni chuckled: “You’ll get used to me slowly.”

Xiao Baijun said nothing more, just moved a little further away from Dai Ni.

Teacher Xiang resumed the class but noticed Zuo Qiu was clearly distracted. After Zuo Qiu zoned out for the nth time, Teacher Xiang asked him, “Zuo Qiu, are you feeling unwell?”

Zuo Qiu came to his senses, feeling a bit embarrassed. “I’m fine.” Zuo Qiu forced himself to concentrate, trying hard to convince himself that this wasn’t the first time he’d seen Xiao Baijun dating, and he should have gotten used to it, but for some reason, his composure was completely lost this time.

Finally, when the class was over, Zuo Qiu prepared to return to his room.

Dai Ni said to Xiao Baijun, “I’m hungry. Come with me for a late-night snack.” Seeing Zuo Qiu about to leave, she also asked Zuo Qiu, “Zuo Qiu, are you coming?”

Zuo Qiu forced a smile. “You two go. I’m a bit tired. I’m heading back to my room first.”

He walked towards the door with his notebook, ignoring everyone’s reaction.

As Zuo Qiu walked, he scorned himself for being so conflicted. He had told himself he would be happy just seeing Xiao Baijun happy, but now seeing his crush happy felt incredibly harsh!

Zuo Qiu, who was wandering aimlessly, was too unfocused. He walked past two rooms before realizing it. He returned to his room door, took out his key card, opened the door, and turned to close it when a large hand stopped him.

“I want to come in and sit down,” Xiao Baijun said, looking into Zuo Qiu’s eyes.

He didn’t go for a late-night snack with Dai Ni? That was the first thought that flashed through Zuo Qiu’s mind when he saw him.

“It’s not convenient,” Zuo Qiu refused, looking down. He wanted to be alone and quiet for a while, undisturbed by anyone, especially Xiao Baijun.

Xiao Baijun ignored Zuo Qiu, pushed the door open forcefully, and closed it after entering.

“Insufficient reason,” he said, indicating he wouldn’t accept the refusal.

Zuo Qiu saw Xiao Baijun barge in, his face icy, and instinctively backed away.

Xiao Baijun walked towards Zuo Qiu, step by step, as if taking a stroll. “Are you scared? Scared of what?”

Zuo Qiu was a little lost at the moment, as if something had completely derailed. He continued to retreat, stammering, “N-nothing to be scared of.”

Xiao Baijun didn’t speak, just followed Zuo Qiu. At this moment, he resembled a ferocious lion, waiting for its prey to completely lose the will to resist before consuming them whole.

Zuo Qiu slowly backed up against the wall, with nowhere left to go.

Xiao Baijun stepped forward, placed his left hand on the wall, and stared at Zuo Qiu, saying, “Run, keep running.”

This atmosphere made Zuo Qiu feel inexplicably afraid. He didn’t dare to look into Xiao Baijun’s eyes, quietly rebutting, “I’m not running, not running…” His voice trailed off.

Xiao Baijun’s right index finger directly hooked Zuo Qiu’s chin. Staring into his eyes, he said, “Tell me, why are you unhappy today.”

Zuo Qiu instinctively denied, “I’m not un…” happy.

Before he finished speaking, Xiao Baijun’s lips pressed down directly. Zuo Qiu’s eyes widened like brass bells.

Their lips touched for a second, then separated.

“Tell me the truth, or I’ll keep kissing you.”

Zuo Qiu swallowed hard, his head spinning a little. He made up an excuse, “I… I think I’m sick.”

Xiao Baijun’s lips pressed down again. This time, it wasn’t just a light touch. He bit Zuo Qiu’s lower lip, his tongue attempting to break past Zuo Qiu’s teeth.

“Stop, stop, stop, I’ll talk, I’ll talk.” Zuo Qiu quickly turned to the side, avoiding Xiao Baijun’s lips.

“Mmm, speak. If your answer doesn’t satisfy me, I’ll still continue,” Xiao Baijun said in a husky voice.

Zuo Qiu now believed Xiao Baijun would follow through and didn’t dare to lie. He closed his eyes and said, “I’m unhappy seeing you with Dai Ni.”

A slight smile appeared on Xiao Baijun’s lips. “Continue.”

“I used to hope you would be happier than me.”

“And now?”

“Now…,” Zuo Qiu paused for a second, answering half-jokingly, half-seriously: “Now I just hope you live better than me and die sooner than me.”

Xiao Baijun’s behavior recently had inadvertently sparked his possessiveness. Previously, seeing him with his girlfriend, he could pretend to be composed, but now watching the person he loved being intimate with someone else, Zuo Qiu felt miserable.

Xiao Baijun didn’t look upset at all hearing Zuo Qiu “curse” him; his eyes were full of amusement. He looked at the lowered head of Zuo Qiu, wanting to melt him into his very bones.

“Don’t worry, if I die, I’ll take you with me.”

He then kissed Zuo Qiu’s lips again. This time it was no longer a gentle breeze but a storm. Xiao Baijun’s aggressive tongue forced its way into Zuo Qiu’s mouth, causing a frenzy.

Zuo Qiu, momentarily distracted while being kissed, was still thinking about the previous issue: He promised he wouldn’t kiss me if I told the truth! A man’s words are completely unreliable!

Finally, Zuo Qiu was pressed onto the bed by Xiao Baijun. While kissing him, Xiao Baijun’s hands were also busy, exploring his body and moving downwards.

When his hand reached a certain part of Zuo Qiu’s body, Zuo Qiu’s eyes were full of disbelief.

When it was over, Xiao Baijun looked at the white liquid on his hand and said to Zuo Qiu, whose eyes and brows were filled with a seductive haze: “Ever since I saw you watching that adult film once, I’ve always wanted to do this in my dreams.”

Adult film? Dreams? The information in Xiao Baijun’s words was too much. Before Zuo Qiu could sort out his thoughts, Xiao Baijun had already headed to the bathroom.

As he reached the bathroom door, Xiao Baijun looked back and winked at Zuo Qiu: “That part of you is really cute.”

Zuo Qiu blushed fiercely and quickly pulled up his pants.

After Xiao Baijun washed his hands, he stopped Zuo Qiu, who was about to get up to take a shower, and lay down on the bed next to him, naturally holding Zuo Qiu’s hand.

Zuo Qiu was still in a daze, wondering how they had ended up like this.

“Ask whatever you want to ask.”

Xiao Baijun was generous, acting as if he wouldn’t hide anything if Zuo Qiu asked. Of course, internally, he actually wanted Zuo Qiu to ask so he could officially acknowledge and stamp their relationship.

But Zuo Qiu didn’t follow Xiao Baijun’s script. “No, nothing I want to ask.”

Xiao Baijun turned and glanced at him, raising their clasped hands. “You’re not asking what this means?”

“A handshake of friendship?”

Xiao Baijun rolled over, pressed down on Zuo Qiu, kissed his lips, and then moved one hand down to a certain spot. “If this kiss is called a kiss of friendship, what do you call this touching?”

“Do you believe pure friendship allows for this kind of caress?”

Zuo Qiu’s face was red, and he turned his head away.

Xiao Baijun wouldn’t let him go, using his hand to straighten Zuo Qiu’s face. “Say it. What is our relationship now?”

Zuo Qiu met Xiao Baijun’s eyes. His pupils were black, like a black vortex, devouring one’s will, causing Zuo Qiu to involuntarily say what Xiao Baijun wanted to hear.

“Boyfriends.”

Xiao Baijun smirked, leaned down, and awarded Zuo Qiu another kiss. “Good boy.”

The two lay quietly for a while. Xiao Baijun said, “I’m sleeping here tonight.”

“What if someone finds out?” Zuo Qiu was a little worried.

“Scared of what? Is it only okay for men and women to study a ‘night script’ (euphemism for sex) but not for men and men?”

Zuo Qiu laughed, his chest rising and falling dramatically.

Xiao Baijun sat cross-legged on the bed and said to Zuo Qiu, “I know your worries. So in public, we’re still just ordinary teammates until I find a good opportunity to announce it. But privately, you have to be honest with me. If you have any difficulties, just tell me, and we’ll solve them together.”

Zuo Qiu got up and sat on the bed. Instead of answering Xiao Baijun’s question, he asked him, “Do you really like me?”

He had already accepted the sudden fact that he had a boyfriend, but regarding this fundamental question, he was still a bit confused. He clearly liked girls not long ago, so how did he change so quickly? And how was he so sure Zuo Qiu also liked men?

“Do you remember half a year ago when you were watching an adult film in the dorm? Oh, maybe the times are too numerous, and you don’t remember which one. It was on the morning of x month, x day, 20xx. The background of that adult film was on a balcony…”

Zuo Qiu wanted to hit Xiao Baijun over the head with a hammer. He wasn’t that enthusiastic about that kind of activity, and with other people in the dorm, he couldn’t do it often. So, as soon as Xiao Baijun mentioned it, he remembered that one specific time out of only a few, and it turned out Xiao Baijun had discovered and watched?

“Get to the point,” Zuo Qiu didn’t give Xiao Baijun another chance to expose his privacy.

“Oh, the point is, ever since I accidentally peeped at you doing that shush-shush thing, and then started having wet dreams all night, and every time you were on the bottom, I knew I had fallen into your trap. Of course, I struggled, but I still lost to you.”

Zuo Qiu’s face had been constantly flushed. Now, after hearing Xiao Baijun’s words, even his neck started to turn red. He blurted out, “Then why did you find a girlfriend?”

Xiao Baijun sighed, “Can you not bring up that dark history? Just pretend I was having a momentary lapse, okay?”

Zuo Qiu could actually guess Xiao Baijun’s mindset. Suddenly realizing he liked men overturned his previous fixed way of thinking. During this period of self-doubt, he probably wanted to do something to prove his sexual orientation, so doing something like getting a girlfriend was quite normal. Just like Zuo Qiu had secretly watched adult films for self-identification, Xiao Baijun found a girlfriend. But Xiao Baijun’s approach must have hurt the girl.

“Did Sister Xinyi find out about your situation?” Otherwise, a person’s sudden change of character and frequent hysteria would be inexplicable.

Xiao Baijun didn’t talk about his entanglement with Zeng Xinyi, taking all the blame on himself: “It was all my fault. I hope she can be happy in the future.”

Zuo Qiu was silent for a while, then asked uncertainly, “Will you still like girls in the future?”

Xiao Baijun lay back. “Yes!”

Zuo Qiu’s eyes dimmed.

“If you get a sex-change operation, I’ll like you as a girl.”

Zuo Qiu had a delicate appearance. Last time, when he wore women’s clothes on the show, he looked even better than most girls.

Xiao Baijun wasn’t sure if that beautiful outfit had hit him in the heart, or if he just accepted all aspects of the person he loved. Xiao Baijun felt his heart race when he looked at Zuo Qiu in women’s clothes, just like when he dreamed about that night six months ago. He had never felt this way about anyone else.

Zuo Qiu looked at Xiao Baijun’s teasing expression and slowly recovered. His heart was so sweet it felt like it was bubbling. It turned out that being with Xiao Baijun was such a pleasant thing. He could tell him many things on his mind, touch him, and even do more intimate things. This feeling was so good, so good that he decided that no matter what happened in the future, he would never let go.

Zuo Qiu held Xiao Baijun’s hand, looking at the lines on his palm, and said, “I had prepared to be alone for the rest of my life. I liked you but didn’t dare to let you know. I admit I was timid. I was afraid of strange looks from others, and even more afraid of my parents being hurt because of this. I was always hiding in my shell. Now that you’ve pulled me out, I’ve lost my last armor, so…” Zuo Qiu looked up, staring deeply at Xiao Baijun, “If you regret this later, I won’t agree. I don’t know what I would do then, but I can assure you it won’t be as simple as just cursing you to die sooner than me.”

This was Zuo Qiu’s personality. Once he made a decision, he wouldn’t allow things to be abandoned midway. This spirit of persistence was probably why he had been an unbeatable academic ace since childhood.

Xiao Baijun looked at Zuo Qiu, his eyes filled with pleasant surprise. He knew Zuo Qiu was indecisive about relationships and thought it would take some effort for him to truly and willingly be with him. It turned out the timid Zuo Qiu was actually waiting for someone to pull him out.

“I couldn’t ask for anything more!”

He wished Zuo Qiu couldn’t live without him, and wouldn’t let him leave either!

…

The two showered and lay on the bed, chatting. Zuo Qiu noticed that a certain part of Xiao Baijun was still swollen and suggested, “Let me help you with my hand.”

Xiao Baijun shook his head. “No need.”

“Aren’t you uncomfortable?”

“I am, but I want to prove how attractive you are in my eyes.”

Zuo Qiu found this amusing and a little touching. Xiao Baijun was probably trying to say that he desired him, but he wasn’t with him only because of desire.

This method was obviously a bit clumsy and not very good for his health, so Zuo Qiu took advantage of Xiao Baijun’s distraction and grabbed that certain part of him.

Xiao Baijun sucked in a breath and reached out to grab Zuo Qiu’s wrist.

Xiao Baijun’s grip was quite strong. Zuo Qiu thought he would forcefully pull his hand away, but unexpectedly, Xiao Baijun held his wrist and started moving it up and down.

The implication couldn’t be more obvious.

As Zuo Qiu performed the action, he thought: Men, oh men, they say no with their mouths, but their bodies are very honest—animals.

The two slept wrapped in each other’s arms for the night. The next morning, when Xiao Baijun walked out of Zuo Qiu’s room, yawning and wearing Zuo Qiu’s pajamas, he ran right into Zhao Zhixian, who was about to look for Zuo Qiu. Zhao Zhixian’s eyes almost popped out of his sockets when he saw Xiao Baijun.

Xiao Baijun gently closed the door, glanced at Zhao Zhixian: “What are you looking at? Haven’t you ever seen people study the script all night?”

Zhao Zhixian heard the sentence, which sounded like a threat but was actually bragging. Staring at Xiao Baijun’s retreating back, he couldn’t quite snap out of it. Did… Second Young Master Xiao succeed?

Xiao Baijun walked to the next door, about to open his room, but looked back at Zhao Zhixian standing by Zuo Qiu’s door as if he wasn’t planning to leave, and added: “Zuo Qiu didn’t sleep well last night. Come back for him later.”

The two had been kissing and fooling around all night, too excited to fall asleep until the latter half of the night. Zuo Qiu really hadn’t slept well. When Xiao Baijun got up, Zuo Qiu, who was usually an early riser, showed no reaction at all.

Zhao Zhixian was now definitely, absolutely, 100% sure—the Second Young Master had succeeded, and he even made Zuo Qiu unable to get out of bed the next morning!