Obsession Beyond the Wall of Courtesy - Chapter 91

“That’s right. Revril, you definitely look more stable and better here.”

Floren looked at me with bright eyes. Chartine also nodded and looked at me, and her smile seemed sincere. Especially, her eyes were very gentle.

“You look like you fit this place better than ever.”

“You look more stable and better.”

What Chartine and Floren said earlier kept running through my mind. I had wanted to leave the Bestine mansion the whole time. Even after marrying Cedric, I often had that feeling. When I was at the temple, I was happiest, but now, strangely, everyone said this place suits me well.

My hand holding the spoon trembled slightly. Maybe it sounds spoiled, but being beside Cedric didn’t feel comfortable. It felt like I was floating somewhere, always wanting to leave. Like this wasn’t my place.

“Revril?”

I looked up at the sudden voice and saw Chartine smiling at me.

“Anyway, now that everything is stable, I’m really happy. More people have come to our temple, so things have gotten a bit better.”

Floren nodded beside her. It seemed that everything was going well since I came to Cedric’s side. I couldn’t keep a serious face all the time, so I forced a smile. Chartine whispered softly.

“Revril, Duke Jedburgh seemed quite cold when I saw him before, but now he looks much different. Is the duke always this kind?”

Cedric looked at me calmly. I didn’t look back and slowly nodded. Since I seemed kind to Chartine and Floren from the start, I thought I should keep it that way. Also, since they said everything worked out well because I came here, I wanted to show them a good ending.

Chartine smiled brightly and said with a lively voice that she was glad she was right. I was relieved that Chartine and Floren were happy. But even though I smiled, my heart wasn’t so good.

Cedric didn’t take his eyes off me. I was barely smiling, but since I was also worried about Cedric, my lips almost trembled.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the dining room door, and the butler came in. He whispered something to Cedric. After the butler left, Cedric spoke calmly.

“Vincent has returned.”

They smiled brightly and stood up. When I was about to get up too, Cedric called me.

I stopped and looked at him. Cedric said to Chartine and Floren,

“You two go to the sitting room first.”

The servant naturally guided them. After saying goodbye to me, Chartine and Floren left the dining room.

Soon the room grew quiet, and Cedric said one thing.

“Did you tell them to lock that room?”

I didn’t understand the sudden question easily. Cedric looked at me for a moment and said,

“I mean our child’s room.”

Only then did I avoid his gaze and nodded.

“Why did you lock it?”

His cold voice echoed sharply in my ears.

‘Why is he asking? He probably already knows the reason.’

I couldn’t speak, but I hated the silent atmosphere. Especially because his gaze was intense, I couldn’t ignore it easily.

After hesitating, I spoke.

“Because I didn’t want to see it.”

“Didn’t want to see it?”

When I looked up at his slightly mocking tone, Cedric looked at me with a crooked gaze. His eyes were dry but persistent, as if something was wrong. Feeling like I had to say something, I opened my mouth.

“I built that room long ago, but now it’s the past.”

“Even if it’s the past, I only have good memories with you. Don’t you?”

He asked insistently, and I looked at him.

“You know.”

“Know what?”

“How I feel. Even if I don’t say, you know.”

“How can I know if you don’t say?”

Cedric’s eyes were quite cold. It felt like he was forcing me to say everything in my heart. I couldn’t easily shake off the feeling that he already knew my hidden feelings but was pushing me to confess.

Cedric took a step closer.

“Revril.”

I couldn’t meet his eyes. I remembered the pathetic old me who clung to him and had only illusions and hopes. I didn’t dare say all of that.

“That room was always open.”

It was an unexpected answer. I fiddled with my hands and looked at them with a fixed face. He was close, but I couldn’t look at his face. I felt like crying and barely held it back.

“So you could go in when you came.”

“……”

“That’s why I didn’t lock it but left it open. Anyway, it was what you wanted most.”

“……”

“Our child.”

I bit my lips and held back tears. Being beside Cedric, many wounds came to mind, but there were also so many past memories tied to him that I couldn’t forget easily.

“Anyway, I told them to leave that room open again. Even if they locked it, only certain people would go in anyway.”

At those words, I looked up at Cedric.

“Do you want to use that room again?”

Cedric looked at me for a moment, then said calmly,

“There’s no reason not to. You’re healthy now.”

“……”

“Though your strength is weak.”

His low voice seemed to carry a lot of meaning. I tried not to think about it and asked,

“Do you really want a child?”

Then Cedric stepped closer. His breath was very close. He kept looking at me and said,

“If I didn’t want one, why would I be here with you now? Why would I come at this time and do this?”

“……”

“I have to do my best for you so those people will think better of you. After all, you are the wife of Duke Jedburgh.”

I couldn’t say more and looked away. Then Cedric lowered his head and quietly whispered in my ear.

“Honestly, I didn’t like those people earlier either.”

Surprised by the unexpected words, I opened my eyes wide, and he chuckled.

“You smiled well at them, but to me, you only showed tears.”

“……”

“I thought I supported you more.”

Cedric didn’t take his eyes off me. I had nothing more to say. When I lowered my head, Cedric calmly held my hand. He played with the finger that wore the wedding ring.

When I tried to pull my hand away, Cedric lifted my hand and kissed the ring. Surprised by his sudden action, I stared blankly. Cedric smiled and slowly let go.

“Let’s go see Vincent.”

I calmed myself and left the dining room. Though I walked fast, Cedric followed me slowly. It felt like he was showing me that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t escape.

Finally, I reached the sitting room at my normal pace. Just before entering, Cedric said,

“I already fired the nanny.”

I looked up, and Cedric continued,

“We can’t lose our child that way again.”

Sahel was quite capable. Vincent was calm but surprisingly lively when he found something he liked. Sahel had worked hard spending the whole day with such a child.

“But firing so soon…”

“Sahel understood too. She admitted it was her fault.”

I felt uneasy. Then Cedric came closer and whispered in my ear.

“Revril, Chartine is looking at us very curiously.”

Only then did I turn and look at the sitting room. As Cedric said, Chartine was watching us with curiosity. I raised the corners of my mouth as if nothing was wrong. I was glad I could still use the expression control I learned in society before.

As I approached, Chartine asked with a puzzled look,

“Revril, is something wrong?”

At that moment, Vincent suddenly hugged me.

“Mom!”

I held Vincent and said calmly,

“I think Cedric told you not to worry because I worry about Vincent too much. I am especially worried.”

I barely made up the words, and Chartine smiled and nodded.

“You did take care of Vincent a lot when you were at the temple. Especially worrying about food allergies.”

I forced a smile and nodded. After Vincent was born, I worried he might have peanut allergies like me. Luckily, he didn’t have that allergy but just disliked food with beans.

At that time, Cedric sat beside me and took Vincent.

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