No One Ever Loved Me - Chapter 63

It seemed I had underestimated Edgar. More accurately, I didn’t realize just how petty he could be.

“This is so upsetting. How long were you planning to keep such a big occasion a secret?”

Lady Rosette dabbed at the corners of her eyes with a handkerchief, though not a single tear fell.

“Cecilia, we’re family. Did it not occur to you how it would feel for us to hear from someone else that you’ve entered the palace?”

Edgar sat with his legs crossed, nodding smugly as if savoring every word.

He must’ve been in such a hurry that he didn’t even take time to rest after his journey—calling for Lady Rosette late at night just to tell her personally.

“Even if you didn’t think of me, you should’ve thought of your sister, Isla.”

Lady Rosette’s reputation wasn’t what it used to be. The kind image she had built as a kind stepmother had started to fall apart day by day, mostly due to Isla’s reckless behavior.

Though born into a noble family, hers had already fallen from grace, and Lady Rosette had never truly enjoyed the privileges of the aristocracy.

She had no way of understanding how the truly powerful raised their children.

She was a baron’s daughter who had somehow become a countess.

She must have worked desperately to hide her shortcomings, fearing she’d be crushed by elegant words and social games.

She saw Isla as an extension of herself.

Everything she had once wanted but could never have—everything she had given up—she gave to Isla.

So when Isla learned the truth about her perfect mother’s imperfections, it must have shaken her deeply.

Maybe her recent outbursts were just desperate attempts to deny what she had discovered.

She used to drag her private tutor around to gatherings she wasn’t invited to, forcing herself into events. But lately, her name hadn’t been heard in a while.

Marchioness Federica wasn’t one to gossip, so the rumors had clearly come from Josephine.

Josephine, a close friend of the Marchioness, visited her often.

She would entertain the Marchioness with harmless society gossip and, after the lady went for her afternoon rest, share the stories she knew I’d want to hear.

According to Josephine’s always-accurate insight, Lady Rosette was in a delicate position.

No one openly criticized her, but no one spared her feelings when gossiping about Isla either.

Isla was at the age where talk of marriage should be starting.

Marchioness Federica had speculated that during this trip to the palace, the Queen might begin discussions about the debutantes coming of age.

Though the Marchioness herself had stepped away from high society, the Queen likely wished to give her grandmother a role—if only symbolically.

In this world, the debutante season was essentially a coming-of-age ceremony. The only difference was that it applied exclusively to girls.

Once a debutante completed her ceremony, she was considered a proper adult.

She could attend social functions without a governess or a chaperone, and she could stay out late at formal balls.

“I’m sure you haven’t forgotten that Isla’s debut is just around the corner.”

It was clear Lady Rosette had her sights set on Isla’s debutante presentation.

Federica’s visit to the palace might not be especially noteworthy on its own, but if Isla managed to make a good impression on the Queen beforehand, her future would be secured.

“But if Isla—who hasn’t even come of age yet—meets the Queen now, it could stir up unwanted rumors.”

That was the kind of logic Ricardo had used to figure out my real identity.

Looking back, I’d tried to blend into noble society without ever truly learning their silent rules.

It wasn’t something that could be solved just by reading books.

So, shamelessly, I resumed my correspondence with Ricardo.

Though he’d only recently become a noble himself, he had an astonishing grasp of how their world worked.

After endless rounds of back-and-forth questions and answers, I’d finally managed to cram into my mind the kind of knowledge the real Countess of Linton would naturally possess.

Thanks to that, I could now point out Lady Rosette’s faulty reasoning. I suppose that meant my efforts hadn’t been entirely in vain.

“But Cecilia, she’s your sister. What’s wrong with a younger sister following her older one?”

“That is the problem, Lady Rosette.”

At my cold response, she momentarily forgot to dab at her nonexistent tears and looked at me in shock.

“As you said, Isla is my sister. And when she behaves poorly, it reflects badly on me.”

“Cecilia! How can you say something like that!”

She turned to Edgar, looking for backup.

But somewhere during the conversation, Edgar—who had been nodding like a wind-up toy—had gone stiff.

It was clever of him to bring Lady Rosette here to try to change my mind, but clearly, he hadn’t accounted for Isla.

As soon as the conversation shifted toward her, he crossed his arms and withdrew, suddenly acting like a neutral observer.

He must’ve assumed Lady Rosette would talk about how proper it would be for a wife to accompany her husband to the palace.

“Do you feel the same way, Count?”

Lady Rosette snapped, her tone completely different from the soft, pleading voice she’d used with me.

I suspected she was being bold because she had leverage over Edgar.

Maybe she had seen me visiting Elodie.

Edgar likely had no idea I even knew where Elodie lived, which meant Lady Rosette could’ve used that knowledge to strike a deal with him.

But Edgar keeping two women wasn’t a real scandal. Not in this world. That alone wouldn’t be enough to damage him.

So if I found out where the villa was and whose name it was registered under, she’d likely try to avoid a messy confrontation.

“I have no choice but to take Cecilia’s side this time, Countess.”

Edgar had always ignored anyone who didn’t benefit him directly.

Seeing Lady Rosette prioritize her daughter Isla over him must have disappointed him deeply.

“You know what Lady Isla has done—her behavior, her rudeness—and yet you still want her to meet the Queen?”

At Edgar’s sarcastic remark, Lady Rosette’s pale face flushed bright red.

“Count, you should choose your words carefully. Haven’t you heard women’s hearts are like reeds—bending this way and that? We’re known for changing our minds in an instant. You never know when mine might change.”

Despite her veiled threat, Edgar only scoffed.

Casually, he wrapped an arm around my waist.

There wasn’t much guesswork needed to understand what was going through his head. His wife—me—was the one going to meet the Queen.

Any small deal with Lady Rosette? Meaningless, if the prestige of House Linton rose because of it. He could crush that without hesitation.

Thinking that far, I almost admired him.

People who were wholly devoted to their desires had always fascinated me. But Edgar was more than devoted—he sacrificed himself on the altar of his ambition.

He never thought of the consequences. Once he had a goal, he charged toward it without looking back—like a racehorse with blinders.

“If I’d known Lady Rosette was going to be such a nuisance, I wouldn’t have brought her here. That’s on me, Cecilia.”

And just like that, the “sacrifice of desire” changed course.

Edgar knew that the relationship between Cecilia and Lady Rosette wasn’t nearly as picture-perfect as the rumors made it out to be.

Now, he was playing the part of the supportive husband Cecilia had always wanted.

Conveniently, he erased from memory the fact that he was the one who brought her unpleasant stepmother into this in the first place.

“Lady Isla hasn’t exactly shown the respect a Countess of Linton deserves. I can vouch for that, no matter what anyone says.”

Such a kind, thoughtful statement.

If Cecilia were really here, she might have thrown herself into Edgar’s arms and sobbed on his chest.

Edgar probably thought the same. He looked confused, even slightly disturbed, that I just stood there blinking at him.

“If you want… I’ll speak to the Queen for you.”

Smart man. Offering Cecilia a chance to avenge her painful past as a child—what a tempting offer.

But really, it was all about getting me to beg Marchioness Federica to add another name to the palace visit list.

Looking at his smug face, so sure he could twist my decision with a few sweet words, I finally spoke.

“Not a chance.”

I unwrapped Edgar’s arm from around my waist.

“Isla is my sister. A young girl acting out a little shouldn’t be punished twice over. That’s not how adults behave.”

Lady Rosette’s eyes widened and turned sharply toward me.

“So, what you’re saying is… you’re forgiving Isla?”

“If she keeps to herself like she is now, I have no grudge against her.”

Edgar, meanwhile, bit his lip.

He looked like a man trying to retrace his steps, wondering what he’d done wrong.

His real mistake was never realizing that I wasn’t Cecilia.

Through my correspondence with Ricardo, I realized just how dangerous my position was.

If Cecilia had had even one close friend, I would’ve been exposed far sooner.

But whether it was fortunate or not, Cecilia had no friends. The only person remotely close to her was her old nanny, Martha.

As a servant, Martha had no choice but to accept the changes in me, even if she didn’t like them.

But if someone of equal status—or someone like Ricardo, whose position was arguably higher—had been nearby, I might’ve already been dragged off to an asylum.

The truth was, such a person did exist: Edgar.

He and Cecilia had been engaged for years.

If he had spent any real time with her—even formally—he would have noticed immediately that I wasn’t acting like the woman he once knew.

The same was true of Lady Rosette. Even if she wasn’t a loving stepmother, if she had at least treated Cecilia as a proper daughter, she would’ve noticed something was off.

But neither of them had ever truly known Cecilia. And they had never tried to.

“Don’t worry, Lady Rosette. Even if I don’t see Isla as a sister…”

She sucked in a sharp breath.

“I certainly don’t have the time to go around harassing a young girl.”

I shifted slightly, putting some space between Edgar and me.

“You should escort Lady Rosette home. Since you’re the one who brought her, it would only be proper for you to take her back.”

Strictly speaking, Edgar hadn’t even come with her. He’d simply sent a carriage to bring her here.

He let out a short, frustrated grunt before yelling for a servant.

“Escort the Countess home!”

He probably thought the reason things hadn’t gone his way was because he brought Lady Rosette along. That’s why his sweet little trap hadn’t worked.

The idea that Cecilia might actually reject him—that concept probably didn’t even exist in his world.

“Cecilia, about the palace…”

Lady Rosette hesitated, but when Edgar began acting as if she were no longer there, her face twisted in frustration, and she turned to leave.

I hoped this meant their little alliance had weakened.

“Of course I’m going alone. This isn’t some children’s game where I can suddenly decide to bring another person and just announce it like it’s no big deal.”

Edgar shot me a furious glare, then kicked over a poor, defenseless coffee table.

“Elodie must be tired from the trip. Stay here tonight.”

I quickly stepped in front of him as he headed toward the entrance.

Elodie wasn’t in a stable condition right now. The last thing I wanted was for Edgar to see her.

“Marchioness Federica has high hopes for Elodie’s upcoming performance. If her health declines and the schedule gets delayed, that would be a real problem.”

My added explanation made him hesitate.

And so, the sacrifice of desire grumbled, swallowed his pride, and stormed upstairs.

Support