No One Ever Loved Me - Chapter 51

No matter the circumstances, I had a mountain of responsibilities waiting for me.

I couldn’t afford to miss out on the valuable opportunity presented by Edgar’s business trip.

After leaving Marchioness Federica’s estate, I let out a quiet sigh.

The Marchioness genuinely loved and cared for the Queen.

That kind of affection—an unconditional, motherly love—was something unfamiliar to me, a concept I had never truly known.

I hadn’t meant to cause any trouble for the Queen, yet I couldn’t predict how the Marchioness might interpret my actions.

“My lady, the carriage you’ll transfer to is ready,”

Sarah approached and whispered. I had already planned to visit the house where Elodie lived.

Back home, I had left a message saying I’d be dining with Marchioness Federica.

That way, everyone would believe I was still at the estate.

“Wouldn’t it be better to send someone to bring the nanny here instead?”

Sarah, much like Martha, saw Elodie as a constant irritation.

She once even boasted that she’d gladly pull out all of Elodie’s hair for my sake.

Now that Martha was gone and this was her chance to shine, the only reason she’d suddenly hold back was obvious.

She hadn’t reported my whereabouts to Lady Rosette.

Before entering the estate, I had given Justin specific instructions.

While I spent time with Marchioness Federica, he was to keep an eye on Sarah and ensure she didn’t leave or act without permission.

Judging by Justin’s confident, unwavering expression, I felt certain he had carried out his orders faithfully.

“Elodie is away on a business trip with Edgar anyway. I’m just going to look at an empty house—there’s no need to involve more people.”

“But still… what if the caretaker tries to stop you, my lady?”

“If that happens, we have Sir Juan. It’ll be fine.”

Sarah looked visibly frustrated. Things weren’t going her way, and it was written all over her face.

“My lady, caretakers don’t just back down because there’s a knight present. It might only damage his honor.”

Sir Juan, who had been silently listening, took a step forward. I stopped him with a slight nod.

“You must’ve forgotten about Justin. He’s not a knight—so there’s no honor to worry about.”

If Justin was offended by that comment, it would mean his recent change in behavior was just an act.

“Of course, my lady. You can count on me. There’s no need for Sir Juan to step in. If things get noisy and your identity is exposed, that would be far worse. I’ll handle everything quietly.”

Justin thumped his chest with confidence.

Sarah’s face twisted in displeasure.

I smiled gently.

I could finally trust that both Martha and Justin were truly on my side now.

At least one small problem had been taken care of.

A much bigger issue still remained—and it wasn’t something I could solve on my own. So, for now, I decided to push it aside.

No matter what conclusion Ricardo came to, all I could do was deny everything.

At the time, I’d been so shocked by what I heard that I was at a loss for words—but I had already come up with an excuse.

“I’m just worried, my lady. If something happened to you, the Count would be devastated.”

Edgar? If I were to suffer an unfortunate accident, he might shed a few public tears—but deep down, he’d be the happiest man in the world.

He’d earn praise for not abandoning his disabled wife, all while gaining free access to Cecilia’s wealth.

“If he truly cared, he wouldn’t have continued seeing Elodie all this time.”

At my calm and logical response, Sarah finally went silent.

Even though I had changed over the past few months and no longer yearned for Edgar’s affection, the emotional fortress that the old Cecilia had built still stood strong.

Everyone believed that Cecilia had loved Edgar with her whole heart, to the point of death.

Even my recent actions—though clearly different—were seen as another strategy to win him back.

The funny part was, even Edgar believed that.

“I understand how you feel, my lady…”

“I’m glad you do,” I replied.

As I began to walk, Sarah followed. Her tightly pressed lips showed just how displeased she was.

The moment we left Marchioness Federica’s estate, we switched to a rented carriage hidden deep in the overgrown brush.

The coachman had paid extra to secure it.

I didn’t forget to change my outerwear either. I had explained the situation to Penelope and asked her to prepare a coat that wouldn’t draw too much attention.

I had to hide my identity as the Countess of Linton, but I also couldn’t appear like a commoner. Taking Penelope’s advice, I chose to disguise myself as the wife of a wealthy merchant.

In this world, wealthy merchants lived lives almost as extravagant as nobles.

They usually owned several homes and increased their wealth through rental income.

So, if I appeared dressed as a merchant’s wife visiting a villa, no one would think twice.

“My lady, I’ll stay behind to watch the carriage,” the coachman said.

Justin took the reins.

The rented carriage was small, and my knees kept bumping into Sarah’s as we sat facing each other.

“She’s not even home—what’s the point of going there now? Wouldn’t it be better to visit when she’s around?”

I pulled my knees in tightly to avoid bumping into Sarah’s in the cramped carriage.

Sarah, seemingly used to tight spaces, looked completely unbothered.

“Even if Elodie didn’t live there, I would’ve gone.”

“What? Why?”

Because that villa belonged to me—or more precisely, it was under Cecilia’s name.

Judging by her reaction, Sarah didn’t know that. Well, of course. There was no way Lady Rosette would’ve shared something that important with her.

I needed to find out how big the villa was, whether only Elodie’s room was under Cecilia’s name, or if the entire property was.

Martha hadn’t told me much.

She said it would only upset me and insisted it was better if I didn’t know.

Since Elodie was living there with Edgar’s blessing, digging into the details would only stir up conflict. According to Martha, ignorance was bliss.

Even though she understood I wasn’t the same as Cecilia, Martha still stubbornly held to her opinion.

She believed that, since Edgar was someone I would spend my life with anyway, getting caught up in his affairs would only wear me down in the end.

But my goal was to divorce Edgar. Yet people like Martha—and society at large—talked like leaving him wasn’t an option. As if I had reached some enlightened state of acceptance.

“But why, my lady? Why go to that house when she’s not even there?” Sarah pressed on.

“I’m curious about Edgar’s assets.”

“The Count’s assets?”

My offhand answer made Sarah’s eyes go wide.

“I want to check if he’s hiding a secret stash of money from me.”

“Oh, I see! You’re going to tear through the place behind that sly fox’s back?”

If there were morning dramas in this world, Sarah would’ve been a loyal viewer.

I couldn’t help but think that as I looked at her disappointed expression.

“My lady, we’ve arrived,”

Sir Juan announced, opening the carriage door. Just in case, I covered my face with a veil as I stepped out.

“This is the place?”

“It matches the address,” he replied.

The villa was quite large. I counted the windows from the ground up—four floors.

It looked like a luxury villa with two residences per floor.

“Justin, tell the caretaker I’d like a tour of the inside.”

As a wealthy merchant’s wife, I was expected to act with a certain level of authority.

Sending Justin instead of knocking myself would give the right impression.

Justin knocked on the office window.

“What is it?”

A gruff-looking man suddenly appeared. He listened to Justin’s explanation, then eyed Sir Juan and me from head to toe.

“Hmm. This isn’t going to be easy.”

The conversation dragged on. Justin gestured passionately as he explained, but the caretaker stood firm, shaking his head repeatedly.

“Well, this place is… different,”

Sir Juan said quietly when I looked at him.

“Most of the residents here are probably mistresses of powerful men.”

“Mistresses?”

“Not just casual flings—these women have been fully set up with homes.”

The word “flings” made me frown.

“Apologies. I know it’s unpleasant, but I couldn’t think of a better word.”

“It’s fine. So you’re saying this place is essentially a secret haven for powerful men and their kept women—so, the security is tight.”

“Exactly.”

Justin looked like he was about to raise his voice in frustration.

Even with a broad-shouldered young man like him pressing, the caretaker didn’t flinch.

This property belonged to Cecilia. Edgar had turned her asset into a hideaway for his affairs, without a hint of guilt or shame.

“Shall I try?” Sir Juan offered.

But I shook my head.

Just as Sarah had said, there was no way that stubborn caretaker would back down just because a knight stepped in.

Knights stood out too much. If someone recognized Sir Juan, I’d be the one to suffer the consequences.

“Let’s wait in the carriage.”

“Cecilia?”

Just as I was about to turn back, I heard a familiar voice.

One I wasn’t happy to hear—and hadn’t expected at all.

“I saw Sir Juan and had a feeling. And sure enough—it’s you.”

It was Lady Rosette.

I glanced at Sarah, who looked just as shocked as I was.

I had been so confident that I’d blocked every path through which information could reach Lady Rosette. So how had she found out and followed me here?

“My lady.”

“Cecilia, this isn’t the kind of place you should be wandering around.”

Lady Rosette had a basket looped over one arm.

“I come by now and then for charity work, but this isn’t somewhere you need to be.”

“Charity work?”

She lifted the cloth covering her basket, showing me what was inside.

“Some people here are starving. They don’t even have bread to eat.”

“This area seems clean and well-kept, my lady.”

There were shops lining the street, centered around the villa. It didn’t look like a poverty-stricken neighborhood.

“You haven’t seen the back streets, have you?”

Lady Rosette smiled as she approached.

“Behind this place is a different world entirely. A terrible one—something a lady raised in the Count’s household couldn’t even imagine. Don’t ever set foot there again.”

At some point, Sir Juan had positioned himself to block Justin from Lady Rosette’s view.

With Sir Juan’s large frame in the way, Justin was now hidden.

I appreciated the gesture, but in truth, Lady Rosette had probably already seen Justin arguing with the caretaker.

She knew I was here. She must have grabbed her basket and rushed out to stop me as soon as she heard.

“If we hadn’t run into each other, you might’ve seen something you’d regret. Come now, Cecilia. Let’s go.”

She clearly wanted to get me away from the villa as soon as possible.

She didn’t even ask why I was there, or why I had taken a rental carriage instead of my own. That only confirmed her unease.

“Come have dinner at home for once. You always hated eating alone, didn’t you?”

I glanced sideways at the villa. I couldn’t walk away from it just yet.

But how was I supposed to shake off Lady Rosette, who was now gripping my arm?

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