No One Else Will Do But You - Chapter 35

When loneliness and solitude arise, the world turns to a blanket of black. When a person is alone, the torment begins.

When he was little, his maternal grandmother fell ill. Due to technical issues in China, she was sent to the United States. At that time, Shu Dad was also working in the US.

From time to time, Shu Mom would go over as well.

Gradually, Shu Luo was left at home, and he started school very early.

They hired an ayi (nanny/housekeeper) to look after him at home, but she was, after all, not his parents.

In his childhood, he was somewhat introverted, liked to play alone, and found it hard to fit in with a group because he was too young. Slowly, everyone just thought Shu Luo was simply introverted. Later, in the fourth grade, an incident occurred: drowning.

During summer vacation, he went surfing in Xiamen with Shu Dad. Perhaps there weren’t many people there at the time, and not many people were surfing.

Shu Dad was surfing freely alone, while Shu Luo played with sand on the beach. Perhaps he got bored of playing and wanted to splash around in the water. He was swimming along the shallow edge when he suddenly drifted toward the deeper water.

His parents often took Shu Luo swimming when he was young, so his swimming technique was good. Although the sea was deep, the water along the edge was definitely safe.

Perhaps invisible things are often the killers.

When swimming, all he could hear was the sound of the water. It was very quiet, but this silence made Shu Luo feel extremely uncomfortable, even tormented. He didn’t know why, but he relaxed his hands and feet and simply let himself sink.

The area where he sank created a ripple. Someone spotted it and immediately yelled for the lifeguard.

Shu Dad immediately returned to the shore; his child was indeed gone.

“A child just drowned, but they just sank without making a sound. It was terrifying.”

The lifeguard brought the child up, but he was already unconscious, his lips purple. However, his face showed no sign of struggle, unlike the tension of someone desperately trying to survive. Instead, he was completely relaxed.

Shu Dad was shocked and rushed forward immediately, calling out, “Luo Luo, don’t scare Dad!”

“Sir, please don’t panic. Our lifeguard is performing emergency aid now.”

A moment later, the water in his chest was expelled, and the child slowly regained consciousness.

However, a sentence from the lifeguard caught Shu Dad’s attention.

“The child’s state is abnormal; it’s not the normal state of drowning. A person with a strong will to survive who struggles in the water will typically show an extremely tense expression before losing consciousness. Only those with a weak will to live, who are suicidal, exhibit that expression: relaxed. Sir, I recommend taking the child for psychological consultation.”

That’s impossible.

But many things that seem impossible still happen.

“The child lacked parental affection and companionship. If, as you said, you frequently left the child at home while working abroad, this phenomenon is not uncommon. The child’s introverted behavior is different from a psychological illness. If he appears outwardly cheerful but becomes extremely quiet when alone, it’s time you paid attention: What is wrong with the child? Sometimes, neglect is precisely the beginning of a serious development.”

Shu Dad took Shu Luo to see a psychologist, ostensibly saying he was afraid the drowning would leave a psychological shadow, but in reality, he was still concerned about what the lifeguard had said.

“The data shows mild depression.”

Shu Dad was baffled. “But, my child is usually very normal! How could he possibly…”

“The child himself isn’t aware of it; he is too young. But if the child’s temperament suddenly changes, he experiences physical discomfort, or exhibits some extreme behavior, these all need attention. Perhaps you spent too little time focused on the child.”

Shu Dad was silent for a while. Was it really like that?

The ayi who took care of Shu Luo answered.

“Luo Luo is usually very quiet. He prefers to stay alone in his room or play with toys by himself.”

“Are there any other differences?” Because this behavior alone was not enough to explain anything; it only showed the child was quiet.

The ayi thought for a moment. “Well… he can be quite irritable when he’s alone. He likes to tear things up and often messes up his room.”

When Shu Dad told Shu Mom about this, Shu Mom’s face turned pale, not only because of the drowning but also because of the mild depression.

“How, how could this be? My Luo Luo is clearly so cheerful…” Shu Mom’s frown hadn’t eased since she heard the news.

“It is crucial for you, as parents, to accompany the child during this time. The child is still young. While he doesn’t understand anything, you must guide him, or the consequences could be disastrous.”

Since Shu Luo started primary school, Shu Dad was working in the US and couldn’t return. Shu Mom would generally go to the US once a week for two or three days, so Shu Luo was mainly looked after by the ayi. They had truly been neglectful; this was a completely unexpected consequence.

So, Shu Mom arranged for Shu Dad to take care of his mother-in-law (Shu Luo’s maternal grandmother), while she focused entirely on caring for her son domestically, never leaving the country.

It wasn’t until the symptoms mentioned by the doctor completely disappeared and the child fully recovered that she stopped. However, one habit became difficult to change: clinginess.

“I don’t know much about the other things, but the ayi entrusted Shu Luo to me, just in case Shu Luo did something extreme.”

Zhong Qing remained silent, her eyes slightly red.

Zhang Feiyang seemed to notice Zhong Qing’s sadness. “So, he never fights with you to the end when you argue. He feels uncomfortable himself, and he might even get angry. He controls it very well. This is a facade he puts on in front of people, a very good one—sunny, cheerful, positive, and healthy—but he secretly licks his wounds behind the scenes. However, Jiang Mu’s appearance is definitely Shu Luo’s savior.”

The quiet song always revealed a hint of sadness. The back of the person in front of them wasn’t as straight as usual. The always lively brows were slightly drooping.

Zhang Feiyang took a deep breath. “So, all the tolerance is not indulgence; it’s respect for him. I don’t know the extent of your affection for him, but I told you this hoping you can let go. Because Shu Luo’s current state is not sufficient to hold up the sky for you, as he also needs someone to hold up the sky for him.”

“Feiyang, it’s rare to see you so sensitive.” Zhong Qing sounded slightly choked up, but she tried her best to conceal it.

Zhang Feiyang forced a bitter smile. “I can’t bear to see you fall for him, and I also feel heartache for Shu Luo. I hope he can be well. No matter how good I am to him, I can only bring him happiness, but he won’t show his sadness to me. So, I am also trying my best to fulfill my part.”

The song ended, and Shu Luo turned around.

“Why aren’t you two singing? I’m bored singing alone. Come over here, come on.”

Keeping this smile is best. He must keep smiling like this.

Zhang Feiyang and Zhong Qing exchanged smiles and went up to sing together.

They played until 9 p.m., then everyone went home.

“Shu Luo, go up and get some good rest.” Zhang Feiyang patted his shoulder and didn’t say much else.

Shu Luo nodded and smiled. “Thanks! I had a great time today.”

“As long as you’re happy. You just need to be happy.”

Shu Luo noticed his unusually mature tone. “Feiyang… you’re a little different today.”

“Hey, how am I different? Go on up, I’m leaving now!” Zhang Feiyang walked backward a few steps, smiling brightly as he waved and turned away.

As he turned, his smile vanished. He silently prayed: Shu Luo, you must keep smiling.

Shu Luo felt a little bewildered but couldn’t figure out why, so he simply gave up and went upstairs.

“Luo Luo, you’re back. Come and have some fruit.”

As soon as he entered the door, he heard Shu Mom’s voice.

He washed his hands and sat on the sofa to watch TV with Shu Mom.

Shu Mom stroked his head and spoke softly. “Did you have fun today? Playing with them.”

“I did! It’s just a shame Jiang Mu didn’t come back.” He was secretly thinking about Jiang Mu.

Shu Mom smiled. “You’re just too clingy to A’Mu. What will you do if he really goes back to France?”

His heart sank.

“Go back to France…”

“A’Mu’s father is not an ordinary person, after all. I heard this trip back is also to deal with the issue of A’Mu’s stay or departure.”

Shu Luo pondered for a moment. “Is that so…”

Shu Mom sensed the change in his emotions. “Luo Luo, don’t rely too much on one person—Dad and Mom are okay, but if it’s anyone else, you might end up getting hurt.”

Shu Luo felt a bit uncomfortable hearing his mother say such emotional things to him. “Mom, why do you feel a little strange today?”

Shu Mom gave a dry laugh. “How could I…”

She was just overly worried. The child relied too much on Jiang Mu. What would happen if Jiang Mu left? If he were a normal child, it wouldn’t matter, but Luo Luo… she didn’t want him to be hurt again. As parents, it was very difficult for them to fully compensate for the pain a child suffered in childhood, so now, they were doing everything possible to protect him.